SheLikesME?

Good link, thanks.

Hmm, I have read this thread a few times. I'm surprised I havn't posted and annoyed everyone. My biggest fear? EVERYTHING!

I'll give it a shot: - toilet seat is up for politness to the man. Woman can pull it down on her way down to sit. Man has to bend over first. Waste of movement. - Peel the banana so they have a stick to hold on to. - bitter, like seed. Life is to be enjoyed. SWAG

Just stay in TX and never move to CA or PA. You'll be fine At least here it is only half of what you accumalate while married. What you had before is yours or what she had is hers. No alimony except re-education for her to re-enter work force, if she didn't work during marriage. Problem with som eof these states is the lady leaves a guy and shackes up with another and never marries him specifically to get alimony from her ex as well as child support. I have a friend that his ex should be in prison for her cheating and robbery in my opinion. Heck the fact she was cheating for 2 years has no bearing in PA. At least in TX if she is doing that you might get another 10% of the split if you fight it. Also the lawyers just seem to try to get divorces over with here and work by volume, unlike what I hear from the years of settlement conflicts in CA.

Ahhh, you keep your hoola hoop avatar. Your to be comended. Now if Randy W would just get his back on.

David, I see TCM twice now and not shure what it means.

I'm not implying anything, but my wife would be frustrated about those same things too. She would also tell me so, privatly, later. She has been in Europe and worked with Americans and I think avoided getting me into situations, knowing somewhat how I live. I know she is completly embarresed to take me to her parents home who I think have an out house Now the shoes on the couch, WHEW, she would have stepped in and done something about that. In fact her sister was a bit too strict with me and even washed my slippers I carried in my bag before i could walk in her house. she didn't care how rude she was to me about the cleanliness. Later she kinda warmed up to me.

They didn't give me a nikel.

Thanks Eagle Eye. I misread....tooo fast.

If I read Texas law correctly, the state will allow her to drive here for up to one year on entry into the USA on her PRC license. Since she has no SS# I want to get around it as TX requires it for a state license. I wrote the state to see what they have to say, since I am not a lawyer and to verify what I think I read. I will call my insurance co to see if I can add her without a SS#. Hmm, wonder if I should do that. Anyway it is best I find out. Somewhere I read she needs to get an International Permit in multi language including English. Will see if they have them rather than getting a notorized translation. PRC does not recognize them from another country. Wonder if they issue them for their citizens to travel abroad? Here are some links: The Law: http://info.sos.state.tx.us/pls/pub/readta...ch=15&rl=91 Look for Question Out-of-Country Driver License http://www.txdps.state.tx.us/administratio...rol/faq/faq.htm Answer: http://www.txdps.state.tx.us/administratio...s_dl_id.htm#q51 I will keep this thread updated. Or if some of you are ahead of me I would appreciate any advice. I did a search in CFL but found nothing about a spouse having a Chinese license. Funny if this works as the PRC does not recognize our license.

Just glad to see you taking charge and handling this. Go get'em tiger. I hope my wild crazy wife does not stay and i have to do an AOS, but never know........ Just a curious question. Could you have had the interview in CA even though you moved, or do you have to change interviews due to location?

Well now they know what to prepare same answers for.

Thanks Billy. Good info. Will see what the wife says when she is here. I think she wants nothing to do with food other than at a market, considering her childhood responsibilities in the garden. I just wonder about this blood business. Wonder if I was ever fed it? I don't think so as usually they like to try to gross me out over there in China land.

This has got to be for NewDay, where is he? Hahahahaha. I love it. That would be some tomatto soupe there. Maybe mix it with milk. Just curious what all goes into this soupe now. You have my attention Li. Doug PS: and I wouldn't be so afraid of the diseas. Dave, I was thinking only of a place for you to raise your own game, or open a shelter in the county for your food. But seriously these lil meat packing companies are great, sometimes.

Dave, I just love the narative. I hope I can control my wifes conversations so well. I am surprised at her cooperation with you. You handle well. After loosing my entire text I will have to make this short now. It sounds like your condo is in need of seling. Maybe get into a county but make sure pigs are allowed. Some rural areas here allow anything but pig farms. Look for a small meat processing plant. Larger than a butcher shop, but small enough to be more of a mom & pop operation. We go to those for our sauseges and beef for our big 4th of July family party. Get those guys to get what you want and remember where they got it, as one pig/ chicken, sheep, goat, cheetos farmer may be differnt from another. If you find that then maybe you don't need to live in the county. But the drive from the county wouldn't be so bad would it? Maybe your wife needs the city though. I think I ate this chicken in dumplings. I was taken to this dumpling resturaunt on my 2nd visit as I earned the nickname Doug Dumpling while in China. Chicken came out last and after this guy was finished. So how did you do the deed quickly? She didn't mind plucking feathers? http://i16.tinypic.com/2h38rxs.jpg Would she mind knowing a Northern Girl? The real question is if my wife would like a Southern girl I supose. Good poll question brewing. Merry Christmas to you and all. Love your stories. Keep them coming. I love the dialog. Doug

Of course it wouldn't hurt if you can negotiate something with her to come over and take a look at America and your situation. Maybe get married, or maybe go back with her and marry over there. Is that possible on K1? I have no idea, as I abandoned that once I met my wife. Maybe marry in both countries. I guess it hinges on her time away from this new business now. I am not sure if you can convince her you have the money to cover her losses if she gives it up. My wife will not accept LOSS on anything hardly. Good luck. I gotta go work on the house.

WoW. What a touching story. I can relate to this so much. Let me tell you a little more of my wife. As I said earlier, she took this EMBA course through UTA but it was taught in Beijing. I was against it until I prayed and had a change of heart. So I paid for it. She flung herself into school full force. It puts me to shame how much she works at ther job and her studies. She reads all the books from cover to cover. No one else in the class does this, so they all want her on team projects. I got upset due to her putting her daughter with her sister in another town, so she can emerse herself. Also it meant if I came to visit I would interupt her studies. I was to work hard on my side she hoped, like pay off debt and other oportunities. Bottom line I was frustrated and hurt. No matter what I did I could not understand her doing this to me and her daughter. I was baffled. But the good signs showed up. I drug my feet a little on CR1/CR2 issues. Boy has this upset her. I really did not think she was in that big of a hurry to come here. She would remind me from time to time that our marriage was sure and trust is sure, why do I doubt anything? It baffled her. The fact I did not seem so urgent about the CR visas hurt her feelings and she wondered how bad I wanted her. I was frankly surprised. My point is, your lady sounds like a really good gal. I don't think her adjusting to you or a man for the first time is that big a deal or something to be considered at this point. Maybe high strung as hell and logical, yet at the same time deeply emotional (almost uncontrolled) and dedicated to just you. I found my wife was about like a teenage girl on her first date with a boy she really liked. Her reasoning goes completly out the window. Her feelings have been locked up in discipline and culture for so many years, even learning how to be married to her first husband with little to no affection, that it just came out uncontrallable with me on that first visit. Vibratory crazy. I remember questioning her college degrees and high tech job. I could not understand how a woman like this could ever discipline herself to achieve such things. I couldn't. She even questioned herself and had never taken such crazy actions nor felt like she did with me. So her solution after my 2nd visit was to go back in that shell and work like SuperWoman achieving impossible tasks. Yet she talks to me everyday. She just didn't/doesn't want to get too sexy or anything over the phone because it is hard on her. It really is hard on her. It sounds to me like you have a LOT to work with. It may be too late or maybe not, but maybe marriage is OK now. Even if you start the process over. I knew it was important to my wife, beside thinking it is the right thing to do. I just feel marriage makes things go smoother in life, despite any wait. Marriage has helped us. It is a big reassurance and she trusts me. Live there, I don't know. If me I would love to if she is willing. On the other hand if you have debt, then maybe get out of it completly. I would let her know there is no one else for me just like she told you. But you will have to let her put her energy into this business if you do live with her. It will take dedication and maybe make you feel a bit ignored, at times. But if you stick it out the 2 years like that, I bet the reward would be great. She will appreciate your sacrifice. She really could not help her sincere disapointment in not marrying back in June. That emotion is so hard to control. Get with her as often as possible or live with her and I bet it would turn out everybit as good as it can be. Just my hunch, and I could be completley wrong. Heck my wife isn't here yet so where is my experience? I gotta go. Wrote this in too big a hurry. Glad you posted. Maybe I should have PMd and said too much too, but I have said so much about myself already from colonoscopyies to my huge new toilet that, OH well. Hey keep posting. And if you wind up in Houston, let us Txas Gang know. Love to meet you.

I think it is 6 months, not 16, right? If 16 I was about to explode.

AGREED 100%!!!!!!!!! But he put it out here for us to debate.

I agree with this 150%. It is extremely unfortunate that the vast majority of Chinese SOs can't come to the States first for a visit. I think it would immensely help out with a long term relationship. Without a visit first, they're all going on blind faith. Some, unfortunately, will not stay in the relationship once they've actually seen what life will be like for them once here. Which begs for debate as to why some do it. We have been over that many times in CFL. Mine had experience with Chinese men that turned her off about them as bad as I was about USA women. Now we both face the culture and habbit differences. But she liked the way I treated her. She never felt so loved or treated so kind. I was willing to do what it took to make it work, incuding live in China. She definatly had that option. She considered it and decided I should keep my good job. But my wife has been all over Europe and one other Asian country. This decision and gamble was easier for her to make, though she was for a European and not an American at first. I met some other ladies one way or the other who did not have my wifes world experience and who were in their 20s. I could have married one of them. Several I met in person and the others on line. I know their fears of change. I would say for those younger girls it was about encouragement from parents and teachers to talk with me and or see about marriage. So I am afraid I see this gals side of things a bit. If I had loved and/or chosen one of the younger ones, I expect I would have been over to see them more often out of necessity, or possibly have to move over. Our ladies have to trust more than us, I feel. This is a big change. It is too bad they did not have this worked out before now. But anytime is the right time. I just wish you 2 all the best in the world what ever you decide. Again I would LOVE to live over there, but we made our decision and it is set. Haha, I guess my wife made the decision where we live, HAhahahaha the jokes on me

Sir Lance, this is what I had in mind as well. Personally of course I would LOVE to live in China. In CFL many have said they would live in China to be with their mate. I recall also words or polls about our own willingness, or not, to give up all we have over here to be with him/her over there. So where is that spirit in this guys? There sure seems to plenty love on her part, but at a young age this process and trouble with it just may be too much. I don't know that anyone could expect this from somone so young and fresh. The college girl I write to help with her english is only 20. In some ways she is more like a Jr. High to High School teen when it comes to boys. I remember when she was shocked when I asked her if she had a bf. Oh no she said. I am too young for that. This is the time in life to study and work hard and learn. Sir Lance, I am glad you read all his posts. I'll take your word for things. Ken, I see your points and I think they should be weighed at all times. But this man is practically married to this girl. I don't think one should give up so easy. Perhpas she shouldn't either. Probably the drilling for the interview and this whole process has been so anti-romantic for her she began to question. None of us really have any idea, but my hunch is that leaving it alone is exactly like Sir Lance has said, she will fly. All of our SOs would have flown if we did not take action. 50 buck and hour in old Hot Humid Houston vs. being with the woman you love, hey no brainer to me. One can probably get a good paying job about anytime. If she is worth it to you then go over. Move over there. It may not work out in the long run. But you have given it your all and can make a good conclusian as a man. One thing I hate about this process is the ladies/men cannot come over for a visit first, meet the family, look at your house, see what you do every day. Even with love they just may not want it. I have told my wife repeatedly that once here she is free to go. I have insisted that she NOT sell her house. She says if she sells her house she would have to like mine and life with me. Yes, this is real dedication, but if she were 22 in China which is more like a teenager in America, I would not expect so much dedication. It does not mean it would not work out and that she is less of a good wife. She is just not experienced. The process has hurt your finace's tender feelings. I would say most of our women have already had their feelings pretty bruised by others in their past. This girl never has. I would cherish this and try to preserve her feelings the best I could. That being said, maybe reality is you cannot find a good paying job in China. Maybe she would be disapointed in you if that is the case. Who knows, but if this is who you want to marry and she just wants to live there, HEY HOW MANY MEN IN THE USA LIVE IN A STATE OR SIDE OF TOWN THEY DON'T WANT TO LIVE IN BECAUSE THEIR WIFE NEVER WANTED TO LEAVE HER PARENTS AND FRIENDS. Heck my boss gave up a huge farm in OK to live in high priced LA in CA to be with his sweetheart. There isn't a damn thing wrong with this girl wanting to stay in CHina for awhile. She loves you I bet, but she is not so sure about all the other. Your ball.

Not sure if she will do it or not, but it seems to me it is in her best interest and yours that she get the visa and do what ever she needs to about the medical. Just keep the options open. OK you are her first man. She is looking at going to a new country on the other side of the world. That country has made her feel unwelcome. She wanted your mother or family to come and visit? Sounds pretty good to me. Isn't it in their culture that someone rasises the child other than the parent? My wife still had her ex's parents living in her house taking care of her daughter when we met and married. I had to live with them too on that visit. My mother lives with me and my wife asked very humbly once if my mother would still live with us. She said I think I can learn a lot from her. Can you believe it? A woman wanting the mother in law in the house? You have to understand her culture a bit more than ours. Maybe this is a need that she has. Maybe she needs more than you. Family and friends seem so tight in China compared to the USA, IMHO. Now I am just fishing here, and we only here your side of things. Young and immature, OK, maybe. But if her feelings are strong enough to wear your ring that long and she understands herself a bit, then I would try to make her as comfortable as possible. We are talking about Chinese who base decisions on more than love. There is the whole arrangement of things and family ties. Money does not seem that important and thats good. But usually the ladies in China are much much more practical about their marriages. It is said that love is not that high on the list, but I am not so sure that is true. But other more practical matters are very high on the list with love than what we have in America today. I suppose I have more to say, but maybe you catch my drift. There are others who can explain the culture and maturity of their decision making better than I. I would get Mom over there. I would send anyone willing to go. Why not? It does not have to be pressure. I am sure your Mom has some sense, or hopefully. Maybe both of you go and you and your Mom stay in a hotel, so there is no pressure. Personally I like getting married instead of the finace business, so people can flame me for that too. But it sure gives a girl a better commitment, IMHO. I wish you the best. But I would do things to just make her feel at ease. I personally would not give up without a trip over. You can always stay at a hotel. You can always do things in a way where there is no pressure.

YYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO oooooooooooooooooooo I HOPE you are no longer LOST and no longer BLUE!!!!!!!! :icecream:

YYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO oooooooooooooooooooo I HOPE you are no longer LOST and no longer BLUE!!!!!!!! :icecream:

DUDE!? WoW! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH HHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOoooooooo ooooooo :icecream: