Cerberus

Yin uses both umbrella and SPF 45 subblock like Tonado's wife. I know that he is further north than I am. Best option she likes is to AVOID the sun altogether. IMHO, why a person goes to this extent to protect themselves for the sake of beauty is an ongoing eternal question, that American laowei's probably won't ever be able to explain.

Michael, I won¡¯t try to sound like a smart aleck in response. The question that you are proposing has been posted on numerous times. The opinions are very diverse. The consensus of opinion I believe was not wear the ring during the interview (the ring raises a too many questions, etc, etc0. The second part of your question was when to give, where to buy etc, etc. I believe these questions, have been discussed so many times and there are so many opinions, I wouldn't hazard a guess to where the correct answer was. IMHO, the best thing to do is to use the search function for CFL and form your own opinion. In my case, the engagement and wedding ring were one and the same (welded by jeweler at my direction). However I was a K3 Visa petitioner (marriage based). I know that my wife doesn't really care much all that much about rings and wears a small platinum band I purchased also for her for her marriage. The diamond ring I brought to her (family heirloom with 1 karat) diamond stays locked in a safety deposit box). This is only her opinion. Your fianc¨¦e¡¯s may different. The decision is based on what your fianc¨¦e decide. Good luck

Now that is a thought filled with wisdom!

Charles, Most of the times I have been to China I drive. Go to AAA get international license. Approach dealerships outside of major hotels. For a token gratuity, and basic rental fees (although prorated for Laowei's) , driving is is very easy. However as may other posters have said, it is luck of the draw. You have an accident, YOU will be held accountable. No matter whose fault. Goes without saying throughout the Far East. Driving is dependent on you and your confidence on your driving abilities. The countryside not as big of a problem. City, I shut it down and let the taxi driver do the driving. BTW, getting a rental moped is akin to going to Hell and throwing lard under the runners trying to go faster. There is no protection. You still will be held accountable, etc, etc IMHO, you might want to have your SO contract a driver with a verbal contract. They can drive you for less that $20.00 a day, they carry the burden of insurance and have to deal with the cops. All you have to do, is have your SO or yourself make arrangements with the driver when and where to pick you up. Generally, you pick up the driver's meals. Just other options for you. A AAA international drivers license is NO GOOD in China Agreed about international license. However money talks and BS walks. IMHO, they would rent a car to Cheetah (from Tarzan) with an international license or a license from Nebraska. I already did this. The rental agency around the corner from the Minshan Hotel, in Chengdu. They only asked if I was a good driver. Thank God, I left my white cane outside and showed the them the ominipotent universal sign of unlimited Visa. Already been there and done that. Same advice applies, you drive, you wreck, you Laowei, you pay! His choice whether he drives or not! Shanghai, Beijing, Shenzen, I use the driver option! I may be stupid! However, I ain't crazy!

Charles, Most of the times I have been to China I drive. Go to AAA get international license. Approach dealerships outside of major hotels. For a token gratuity, and basic rental fees (although prorated for Laowei's) , driving is is very easy. However as may other posters have said, it is luck of the draw. You have an accident, YOU will be held accountable. No matter whose fault. Goes without saying throughout the Far East. Driving is dependent on you and your confidence on your driving abilities. The countryside not as big of a problem. City, I shut it down and let the taxi driver do the driving. BTW, getting a rental moped is akin to going to Hell and throwing lard under the runners trying to go faster. There is no protection. You still will be held accountable, etc, etc IMHO, you might want to have your SO contract a driver with a verbal contract. They can drive you for less that $20.00 a day, they carry the burden of insurance and have to deal with the cops. All you have to do, is have your SO or yourself make arrangements with the driver when and where to pick you up. Generally, you pick up the driver's meals. Just other options for you.

Threadbare, Am I incorrect, didn't you say once that you were in Thailand? Just think of your fianc¨¦e¡¯s splashing water about as a lifetime extension of Songkran! (For those unfamiliar with this Thai holiday Songkran is a Thai traditional New Year, which starts on April 13 every year and lasts for 3 days. The receiver of water is blessed and cleansed.) TB, just think of yourself being blessed for the rest of your life! Yes,there is a version of this festival in China. The festival is interesting,but if you are "laowai" everybody gangs up on you with buckets and buckets of water. DONT carry anything valuable with you because it will get soaked. One day of the festival is the water thing,but the other days are boat races and parade,so these are definately worth checking out if you are in town.The problem with this festival is that the 40rmb hotel room skyrockets to 200rmb+,and thats for the low end rooms. Yep, I see you have been there and done that. The water war in Thailand is still going on and Laowei's are definite "targets of opportunity!!" Thailand it has resorted to the use of water cannons in some of the popular soi's. Haven¡¯t had the opportunities to experience China's water festival. Thai children are the Thai equivalent to stealth WMDs. They "cruise" around looking innocent and childlike, until a target of opportunity crosses into their field of tactical vision. Then the poor unsuspecting farang (AKA Laowei) gets nailed. These attacks are the most insidious and are the hardest to detect! We just returned recently from LOS. I found that it is mandatory to carry personal items you don't want soaked in plastic Ziploc bag. Also, carry changes of clothing in a bag, which has been waterproofed. Anyway, this is getting off track from the OP. I'll let my humor subside. In seriousness in regard to the original post, IMHO there isn't much you can do with a person that has grown up this way. The Chinese bathrooms (and many other Far East bathrooms) are built to stand up to water going everywhere and are constructed with this purpose in mind! I don't really mind myself and actually do enjoy them being built this way! My wife finally the changed the paper issue when I deliberately didn't empty the bathroom trash can. We left on a 2-week trip. Upon our return, the bathroom stunk to high heaven. When she asked why, I quietly showed her the trashcan with the refuse within, with a few explanations. After that she changed all by herself. IMHO, your SO will just have to change this herself in regard to the water and paper issue. You know what this entails don't you? Trying to get a stubborn Chinese woman to quickly change is not at all unlike akin to kicking a Union Pacific locomotive off it's tracks. Do you want to borrow some of my plastic bags to protect some items in the bathroom?

Threadbare, Am I incorrect, didn't you say once that you were in Thailand? Just think of your fianc¨¦e¡¯s splashing water about as a lifetime extension of Songkran! (For those unfamiliar with this Thai holiday Songkran is a Thai traditional New Year, which starts on April 13 every year and lasts for 3 days. The receiver of water is blessed and cleansed.) TB, just think of yourself being blessed for the rest of your life!

Robert, Yep, in my mind's eye I think that the chickens are still are still pissed off. These days, I open the freezer door carefully. In the case that one of them reincarnates into a cougar and attacks, when I open the door. Dave

Li, You exactly mirror my thoughts, I was very concerned about the bacteria, etc. That was where the frozen man-chicken comes in at! As I stated, getting good Chinese groceries in Oklahoma City, is a very poor option. That is....not unless I want to go to DFW about 450 miles away. Shhhh! My wife hasn't thought of this option yet! LOL Dave

This has got to be for NewDay, where is he? Hahahahaha. I love it. That would be some tomatto soupe there. Maybe mix it with milk. Just curious what all goes into this soupe now. You have my attention Li. Doug PS: and I wouldn't be so afraid of the diseas. Dave, I was thinking only of a place for you to raise your own game, or open a shelter in the county for your food. But seriously these lil meat packing companies are great, sometimes. Doug, Good thought. I had that one immediately and openly suggested to Yin to use a packing packing company, since I didn't want to do the butchering. But Nooooooo! Yin wants to save money! That will teach me to keep my big mouth shut! Note to self: Next time, just do it and don't talk about it! Damn! Sometimes the frugality of the Chinese people drives me crazy! Dave

For Doug and Bobby, I see a commonality in your post so I will handle response as one. Dog, no don¡¯t need to sell the condo. In fact we rent it. Yin and I have no desire to have additional homes. Who would we give them to when we depart this, "vale of tears?" When I was a soldier in Korea in 1976, I rented a small place outside of Euijeongbu. Every morning the owner would bring 10 or 15 chickens into the courtyard. I would wake up to clucking of the chickens and the like. I would lay in bed an attempt to go back to sleep. That is when one chicken would be grabbed and I would hear this awful ACCCCCK noise as he killed them. This is about 0530hrs in the morning. Now try to imagine me, having a chicken hung upside down from a porch beam, drawing the chickens neck with children probably watching at first, then running off into the distance to tell their horrified parents. The rest of the vision consists of me being hauled away by local gendarme. This is all done in this nation's new "Politically Correct" environment. I would be found sooooo guilty and soooo quickly my head would swim! LOL As to the dispatching, I know that CFL many members of CFL disdain being ¡°Politically Correct.¡± However, many don¡¯t disdain the term and might take offense. As to the execution, I better not push the envelope and horrify some readers. I¡¯ll PM. As to the feathers and offal, that is where I extracted my ¡°pound of flesh.¡± Remember the adage ¡°You shoot it, you clean it¡± given to hunters. I eluded that that the old statute had been repealed in recent years and had been changed. She bought it hook, line, sinker and the stern of the boat. God! Sometimes, I¡¯m such a bad man! Bobby and Doug both. The hardest thing in my relationship is at times keeping a straight face. Yin is extremely cultured and educated. However, there are some chinks in her armor. You just have to know where and what they are. This is done only with great care and slight probing. LOL It takes some bit of time and no undue amount of idiocy on my part. Go to what is proverbially stated ¡°Going where angels fear to tread!¡± Pissing off a Chinese woman ain¡¯t in my game plan! On a more serious note Bobby, Doug and all readers. Yes, huge amounts of humor can be found. This is true of my marriage and all others. You have to stop and smell the roses, see the humor and enjoy what you have. This is the underlying message in these posts. Many people miss the humor, or take the differences of their better half for granted. These omissions can lead to loss of love, trust, companionship a man and woman provide to each other. The marriage is not unlike water, it will always seek it¡¯s own level. Once the marriage has become stagnant at the lowest rice paddy, disaster is not very far off in the form of separation or divorce. The water (love) must be contained with walls, and refreshed with new water (love and understanding) In Korea the best rice (paddy) was always at the top of the mountain, where water was replenished daily. The worst rice was at the bottom paddy where the water was semi-stagnant. A second lesson that I wished to impart to others was that I was not mop-slapped or trained in any way. I married a Chinese woman and I volunteered willingly. I knew that it would be trying at times. I was keenly aware that a mixing of cultures to form a hybrid relationship had to me made. The sum of a marriage is made up by all of the parts, good and bad, of the other person. Many people understand this. However, many people only mouth the words and attempt to change their partner into what they subconsciously believe an ideal mate. They fail to realize that changing the way a Chinese woman is tantamount to trying to push a Union Pacific locomotive off the tracks. They were born Chinese, they were educated as Chinese, they lived as Chinese and they will die Chinese. All of this is backed up with 5,000 years of culture. I believe that you have the idea. Am I the great Buddha or Dr. Phil of relationships? NO! Have Yin and myself argued and disagreed over hundreds of things? Absolutely! Will there be a calm serene marriage, as we grow older in our marriage? Never! Arguments/disagreements will still occur. However, I have a better loving understanding of Yin, as she does of me. In short, both of us have adapted to each other and formed a loving hybrid marriage I spoke of earlier, which will survive for a very long time. Will a divorce/separation ever occur with the steps that we have done? I don¡¯t know. However, what person in the world really knows their future? Enjoy what Life you have today! Tomorrow, it may be gone! Dave

My wife Yin has struck again. Of course, it would be in this particular discipline or area of expertise. To refresh members of where this discourse starts, refer to the link here: http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?...c=12455&hl= To be honest, my wife is truly an excellent cook. She makes every dish from her native Sichuan province imaginable. At the risk of sounding insulting to some members, she turns her nose up with disdain at other Chinese regional cooking. I personally enjoy all of the five major cooking styles of China and always want to try every one of them, when I¡¯m in China. My wife¡¯s words as best as I can remember them with a bit of paraphrasing; ¡°They are not ¡°real" Chinese and DO NOT know how to cook! Sichuan people are the best at cooking!¡± Now readers understand where the title of ¡°Prejudiced Chinese Cooking¡± originates. This original setting was approximately 2 years ago in the city of Chengdu. Let¡¯s us fast-forward to today! Lately my wife Yin has been complaining about the taste of foods that she obtains in America. Most especially, the pork and chicken. She smells them prior to cooking of the meat and will turn her nose up at them. She concisely and clearly states that they ¡°Don¡¯t smell right, and are not butchered and dressed in Chinese style!¡± Obviously, I am just a poor dumb Laowei with only 270~ years of culture behind me. Her culture has 5,000 years, (which I think that she delightedly and gleefully, emphasis on the gleefully) informs me of all the time. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the ultimate Weapon of Mass Destruction, available to any Chinese woman, to establish their premise in any disagreement. As of late, we are more or less forced to do all of our shopping in Oklahoma City. This locale is NOT the Mecca of Chinese culture needless to say! Shopping for foodstuffs is a clever combination of other Asian culture (e.g. Vietnamese, Thai) grocery stores, attending open flea markets, and a variety of American stores. This more or less sets the stage of the following observations and saga. We stop by a Vietnamese grocery store, which specializes in foodstuffs for both Chinese and Vietnamese shoppers. We have an extensive shopping list and this is first stop of the day. The conversation at the meat counter: The players: Yin, one very confused and unsuspecting Mexican clerk (here after referred to as CM) and myself. Alice: ¡°Langon (while standing at meat counter) we do not buy pork." I just want free range chicken!¡± Dave: ¡°What is a free-range chicken?¡± Alice: ¡°Sagwah! This is chicken that walks around and has good exercise with legs and eats very good to eat. They taste very good!¡± Dave: ¡°Exercise does this?¡± Alice: Yes! (She waves at CM to come over for service) CM: ¡°May I help you?¡± Alice: ¡°I want to buy two free-range chickens!¡± CM: What? Alice: (speaking slower) ¡°I want to buy two free-range chickens!¡± CM: I don¡¯t understand you! What do you want? Alice: (speaking very slowly and enunciating every word) ¡°I¡­want¡­to¡­buy¡­two¡­free-range¡­ chickens!¡± CM: What is a free-range chicken? Alice: It is a chicken that walks around. CM: (Looking a bit confused) ¡°Ma¡¯am¡± all chickens walk around! Alice: (becoming a bit exasperated) I know they do! But I want one that walks around wherever they want to.¡± CM: (quickly approaching the point of mental overload looks at me for help!) ¡°Senor, what does she mean by this free range chicken?¡± Dave: ¡°Don¡¯t look at me!¡± I asked and I was called a Sagwah! I know that she wants a chicken to make soup. I know that every times she does this soup it still has the head and feet on it.¡± CM: (immediately brightening) ¡°I know what she wants now, senor!¡± CM: ¡°Please come here ma¡¯am.¡± Here is your chicken you wanted.¡± (He proudly holds one up that has recently come from the freezer. Crisis has been averted!) Alice: ¡°It is frozen!¡± CM: "We have too. It is health Dept rules." Alice: ¡°Stupid rules!¡± CM: ¡°I know but it is law!¡± Alice: ¡°This is man chicken!¡± CM and Dave: ¡°What?¡± Alice: ¡°It is man chicken!¡± Dave: ¡°A chicken is a chicken, what does a rooster or man chicken have to with anything?¡± Alice: ¡°Man chicken is very bad and doesn¡¯t taste good!¡± Dave: ¡°Why?¡± Alice: ¡°Man is a man!¡± Same as man-chicken. They walk around and party, drink and do not do anything. They do not taste good, are too tough!¡± Dave: ¡°Never mind! Just buy the damn chicken!¡± Alice: "But Langoun, it is a man chicken! It won¡¯t taste good." Dave: "I don¡¯t care if it is a man chicken, a woman chicken or a hermaphrodite chicken. We don¡¯t have a choice do we? Besides, a man chicken is called a rooster. A woman chicken is called a hen. OK?¡± Alice: ¡°No I guess not! But soup will not taste good, because it is a man chicken! Are you sure these are the right words for calling chickens?" Dave: Yes, Yin! I¡¯m pretty sure of the English language. OK?" Alice: "OK I trust you. It is still a rooster, not a hen. Very bad taste. We Chinese people know. We have, 5,000 years of culture.¡± Dave: "Darling, I love you and your cooking. I will somehow eat the soup! OK?" Alice: "Are you sure Langoun? It will taste bad you know." Dave: "Yes Darling, I¡¯m very sure!" Shortly thereafter, we departed the store with our groceries and Yin¡¯s ¡°man-chickens.¡± That night she prepared Sichuan style chicken soup with one of the man chickens. The one thing that bothers me is to open the pot up and see a chicken¡¯s head sticking up and looking at me. I usually keep my piece about her cooking. However, I asked why she cooked the chicken with the head on. She has stated that it is for flavor. I don¡¯t know about the rest of you in this forum. I think most American¡¯s would have a great deal of trepidation in seeing KFC, Church¡¯s or Pioneer Chick outlets, sell fried chicken heads, so the product has a distinctive flavor. This sounds like the original source of another urban myth. I wonder if this myth will make it¡¯s way to the Discovery Channel for the ¡°Mythbuster¡¯s¡± program. This is one show that, I do NOT want to miss! LOL On with the saga. We ate the chicken soup over the course of the next few weeks. Needless to say, it was very good. However, there were many times when Yin would remark that the soup would be much better if she had a live chicken and cut Chinese way. I didn¡¯t have a clue of the following: One: Where to get a live chicken? Two: How to kill the chicken in a condominium complex, without violating some rule or another. Three: Who got to do the killing? Mainly because I know that my wife is a ¡°city slicker¡± and the closest that she came to a farm was when she was employed at the PRC Agriculture Bureau, looking at rice paddies and aphids. However, love is love. I began inquiring of people, where I could purchase live chickens. I got some seriously weird looks from people. When they asked why, I would explain the desire for live chickens. They looked like the poor clerk (CM) I spoke of earlier. Many of them were smirking, as I would leave their company. Twice, I imagined that I laughter! (Probably, just my imagination!) I suppose that it good to bring some levity into people¡¯s lives though. I will now set up the next scene for you. Yin and I frequently volunteer at the city animal shelter. I¡¯m the son of a veterinarian and have loved animals all of my life. Yin at first wasn¡¯t too sure about the shelter, since she didn¡¯t have many pets or association with animals (besides rice aphids in her previous employers care). However, she took to it like a champ and began exercising some of the dogs, cats etc. I will point out that the shelter gets a myriad of animals, from raccoons and coatimundis and goes all the way to kittens and dogs. The point; the shelter also has chickens which have either been maltreated or use in cockfights. They are restored to health and later returned to the farm, adoptive home, etc. This is when Yin¡¯s eyes lit up with a new novel and original idea. CHICKENS! In fact LIVE chickens! We now go to the animal shelter: Alice: "Langoun, I want to adopt chickens!¡± Dave: (me thinking quickly, Uh-oh! Something is up!) ¡°Why?¡± Alice: ¡°They need good home right?" Dave: ¡°I suppose so! Why chickens? Get a dog or cat if you want¡± Alice: "But Langoun, I want to adopt some chickens!" I don¡¯t want another dog!" Dave: "Darling, we can¡¯t have a chicken in a condo! First our home is in city limits, which means no farm animals. In the second place I don¡¯t even know what the condo rules are for chickens. Third, how would you feed them?" Alice: ¡°We don¡¯t need to feed them, Langoun!¡± Dave: (This gentlemen is where men need to have SAW. * Military term meaning situational awareness. I could see the gleam in wife¡¯s eyes. Suddenly, harsh reality set in! ) ¡°No Yin! You are not going to adopt chicken from the shelter, take them home with you and provide a pot for them to live in! Are you crazy, or what?¡± Alice: ¡°It¡¯s OK I think. No one is adopting them. They have been here three weeks. I am helping Oklahoma. I¡¯m a very good Chinese woman.¡± Dave: "Darling, I love you! But do you want me to get arrested? The Oklahoma Police Dept would be pissed that I am killing chicken in our yard, with kids running all over the place. The animal shelter people will personally hang me up by my thumbs! Are you kidding? YOU ARE CRAZY!" Alice: "Then I can¡¯t adopt chickens, Langoun?" Dave: "Not for eating them! NO!" Alice: "If you say so, Langoun we won¡¯t adopt them." Dave: "Thanks honey!" Alice: ¡°But, I still want live chicken for soup! You find for me, OK?" Dave: (sighhhhhh) "I¡¯ll try darling." I finally found her chicken at a flea market near Oklahoma City. Went there and purchased three of them. Yes they were alive! I¡¯m thinking that my wife will get off my butt for a while. To the readers remember when I sliced my own thumb in a previous post? To me I cut myself. To my wife, she swore that police and paramedics should have been called. My wife is deathly afraid of blood. Yep! You guessed it! I ¡®m selected as the executioner of the chicken! Better half wanted to do in a tree in the front yard. Why and how is that some Chinese women, don¡¯t look out of the window and see about 10 to 15 kids playing in the yard. This site alone should be a clue to even the slowest idiot! However, I bound their feet, performed the task very quickly and mercifully! Gave the chickens to Yin, who was tasked for dressing the carcasses. Finally! I¡¯m thinking the end has arrived! Later, that night wife proudly set the table with her ¡°Chengdu potted chicken.¡± Albeit with the head and feet still attached and strewed also (for that ¡°particular¡±) Sichuan taste. It was obvious in her eyes that this was a meal meant for Chinese past memorable Chinese emperors of the Tang, Ming, and Song dynasties. And now for the reign of Emperor David, in Oklahoma City! I see the pride in her eyes at her culinary creation. I have now set the stage for the final segment. We began eating and the conversation approximately was as follows. Alice: ¡°Langoun, how does hen chicken taste?¡± Dave: ¡°Darling, it is delicious.¡± (I was saying this, as the omnipresent and baleful eye of the chicken head stared at me from the plate. Can a dead cooked chicken still be pissed off at me?) Alice: ¡°David I told you female chicken is the best. We Chinese people know this. Wal Mart and American people don¡¯t know!¡± Dave: ¡°Yes, you are right again darling. Chinese people know what is better!¡± (I have learned to pick my battles carefully!) Thanks honey, for the delicious food¡±! I¡¯m thinking that the battle has been won. Yin has her chicken. Now my life can return to normal again! Alice: ¡°Darling there is something else though¡­¡± Dave: ¡°What is it Lampo?¡± Alice: ¡°American pork tastes funny too. I think American¡¯s do not now how to make pork properly? Can you find Chinese style pork for me?¡± My closing thoughts are CRAP! What Frankenstein have I created? Is it my imagination, or do I hear the same people I talked to previously, laughing again at me? Well! I did marry her for better or worse! I wonder what the condo rules are regarding pigs? The Sichuan Chef and her kitchen slave will now fade to black! Take care all and Merry Christmas. Both of give to you our sincerest regards for continued prosperity, fortunes and continued health to your families and yourselves. . Dave P.S. Yin thanks for all the material you give to me. Thank you for your making my life never to be boring, ever again. I love you.

Great post Kenn. Words of wisdom. OP will have to exercise self discipline and strong will power. If she wants you, she knows where to find you. Ken, At least at the "reaming" you will have company. Statco, myself and you. I couldn't agree more with every word that you have said. Perhaps, in the future they will find a way back together once the pressure is off. Look at M-coon's story. These things do happen! Drew, I cannot experience or even try to understand the feelings that you must be going through right now. All I can say is, that I'm sorry for both of you. It is likely little comfort to you, right now. Perhaps, it better to find this problem now (even if it is ill-timed), than have the problem surface one or two years later in the US. I suspect that both of you, would have been miserable up until the end, with the same problem that you have discovered right now. I know that is small comfort to you. I feel that both of you have lost something precious. You have lost a loving and caring woman/wife. She has lost a caring, responsible and loving man. Again, my condolences. Dave

Nice interview Bobby. I was laughing at you analogy of the kitchen sink. Yin did the same at her interview, as your wife did. In the end they wanted so very little and really only looked at one or two papers. I still remember almost 1.5 years ago, that Yin was pissed because the VO didn't really care to look at her photographs, she brought with her. VO may have looked on his PC and realized that Yin had a ugly husband. Can't blame him. Who wants to look at an ugly person? LOL Dave

NW, Try this thread at http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=14417. It may be applicable. I personally wouldn't worry this much. Check your copies of the other paperwork you sent and insure all information is correct. If not; the phone number is in the link I gave you. To me, it seems like a typo on a clerk's part on the NOA2. Dave

Bobby, Congraulations. BTW, I'm sure that she has a Chinese/English dictionary and/or translator to help in her language. Have you gotten her one for Texas/English/Chinese dictionary yet? Best of luck Dave

Doug, My congraulations to both of you. I sent PM, check your inbox. Glad to hear that it all worked out! Dave

Lawrence. Thanks for the congratulations. Nope, I believe that my wife and I are different than most Chinese marriages (However, this may be a genealization on my part). I run all of the family finances, investments, savings, including the paycheck. Inside of the home, what she goes! Outside the home, it is the opposite degree; I have my say so. Of course we both input and make suggestions into each other's domain. For example, she states that she needs new furniture, etc, I work it into the budget; help with the shopping, etc. for her. This check and balance works well for us. Each couple has their own style that they prefer. There is no right way. There is no wrong way. To insure that other not think that I'm a control freak, she has her own Visa and Bankcard, and knows almost to the penny how much we have at all times. My only thing that I would worry about a watch is her choice of style. Almost the same thing applies to clothing. These are articles that I almost never, ever buy for my wife. What I think looks, good, sexy, colorful, etc, etc, may not be what she thinks the gift is. The watch falls into this category. However, I believe watches are not considered the same things as clocks. I know that Yin comes a very cultured and educated family; books, educational items, etc are the norm for them. However, this is my family, yours is probably different, as is every other forum members is different. I would suggest the intelligence game and determine what is good or bad. Clayton already covered the big faux paus's in his posting. I would be a bit leery of purchasing electronics, that are expensive for 2 reasons 1) A lot of the same goods are there and quite a bit cheaper. You might want to keep the cash or bankcard in hand and take them to the electronics store and get what they want. of course you PAY! LOL. 2) Chinese Customs may take exception, when you accidentally leave them there. Some goods are OK. Some will get their attention and they will ask. Then you have to be left with them, explaining to them that they are gifts etc, etc. I would suggest American and/or European chocolate. Chinese from what I have seen have a particular weakness for chocolate, not from China. To my taste buds, Chinese chocolate should only be forced fed to prisoners. I took 10 pounds with me once for gifts. The chocolate was damn near gone at the end of a 10-day visit! Don¡¯t know how, but none of them developed acne LOL. May I suggest that you might hold up shopping for make-up and other imported goods. Make a shopping list. Then go on-line and find the duty free store in the airport you are departing from. This way you can save yourself some money on taxes and import duties. Regard to candy, not very extravagant will do. WalMart, Fred Meyer, Sam¡¯s Club Costco, etc is all that is needed. Purchase last minute and/or forgotten gifts in the same duty-free store with European chocolate. Make-up is a good advisement to get also at the duty-free. Yin uses Shishedo cosmetic products. Try to buy them in the US and then compare what you pay in duty-free shops. It is almost 30% cheaper. Take care and hope that I have helped and not confused you futher. Dave

Phanthom, Try this link I did a while back. Goes into face, Chinese family and fiancee/wife, etc, etc. http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?...c=12659&hl= BTW, I added this as an afterthought. My marriage anniversary is December 25th. Yin gets Chistmas and anniversary gifts at the same time. LOL! It is also hard to forget when your anniversary is too! Dave

Dave, it's not Donasho who can grant you permission to distribute that jpeg but the owner of the copyright--which is probably The Oklahoman. At any rate, I went and found the actual online article. http://www.newsok.com/article/keyword/2978976/ That's the link. So Donasho, if you want to edit out the jpg and use the URL link above instead, it'll probably be safer. Cheers. SirLancelot, Thanks for the hyperlink. I only did a short search and turned up nothing. The Oklahoman daily [sic] ain't the New York or LA Times! LOL! See your PM box. BTW, before any rumor-mongerings begin; NO! It isn't a flame either. A personal thanks and several other questions related to the original post. Dave

To all Forum Members, I recently found this article from my hometown newspaper. I thought that perhaps, it might be of extreme interest of CFL members in the southern US. Many, may have missed it! This particular article affects all CFL members in the following areas: 1) NM 2) Eastern half of AZ 3) Southern KS, 4) Texas 5) Oklahoma 6) And I believe the west half of AR. (I may be wrong here) I will caution all members; all the jpegs are copies of copywrited material and special permission was obtained and granted from the Webmaster (Donahso), prior to publication in this forum. As a side note, to members who are planning on my footsteps¡­DON¡¯T! Ask permission first! The Webmaster has to grant the publication of Copywrited material. It is his butt on the line! (The article was drawn for the ¡°The Oklahoman,¡± printed on 30 November, 2006.¡± I submit the following jpegs¡± Item #1 (page 1) http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p273/Typhon_album/OklahomanFinalImagePage1.jpg Item #2, Page 2 http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p273/Typhon_album/Oklahoman2FinalCopy.jpg The only question that I saw immediately was the submission of the EAD at the same interview! I apologize, to forum members. I am very busy, with a new position, wearing ¡°three hats,¡± handling NDT, composites and Quality Assurance and still spending time with Yin; I¡¯m to say the last a BIT overwhelmed. Perhaps, other members can check and overcome my shortcomings. Hope that the information helps others. Thanks Dave

Trigg, I wouldn't go this far. She has a better "shot" at then most. Kids are not a prime concern from what I have seen in China. To pawn an old sage wise black friend once told me; "Money talks and Bullshit walks! You don't have money; you have bullshit!" The odds are slim. However, due to the home she owns, money in the bank (I have never seen a Chinese man/woman not save money and /or "squirrel" money away for a rainy day!). The odds are slim. However, I would probably give her three to one odds that she might be successful. LOL! You might want her to read my posts and become a polite "A-hole." Politeness ain't my strong suit! Why not try it? What does she have to lose? She has far more material values then some I have seen looking for the same thing on this board! Most had far, far less! All they can do is deny her! IMO, the Chinese government wants to see the perseverance of the applicant. Same as GUZ? Have her try a second time. Many times they have relented after the second try. I personally known of two times, that they have relented. Best of luck to your wife, her friend and yourself. Dave

Yes, HK applicants stand a better chance than the mainlander but it still goes back to how financially stable that person is in their home country. If the HK person is a pauper, then his or her visa will be denied. But in general, a HK applicant will stand a better chance than a mainlander. Trigg, I came on late. What Sir Lancelot previously stated, mirrored what a recent visiting Chinese (HK) colleague to our firm stated. The information that I have, is approximately 6 days old. I spent time talking to him about the changes between Hong Kong and mainland China, political climate, etc, etc. I mentioned my wife about travel with green card etc. He told me that the same things that Sir Lancelot told you, almost word for word. The standards are just "slightly" lowered. IMO, probably due to most affluent HK businessman want to return to their country due to money. However, this may be a generalization! I also didn¡¯t want to embarrass him by asking too many questions. Mainland China and Hong Kong is still a sensitive issue to some people. I¡¯m sorry. Try not to shoot the messenger! Dave

LeeJ, Thanks for the information. I might be able to handle this PC, files, etc. For Alice, this may be something else entirely. However your idea has a lot of merit to it for myself. Thanks Dave

http://www.bombayelectronics.com/products.asp?cat=95 http://www.bombayelectronics.com/product.asp?prod=477 Mike, Thanks for the links Dave