frank1538

Just got another email from GZ, again asking me to furnish Jingwen's address in Chinese so they could send her the P3. Having done so twice before, I'm beginning to wonder WTF is up with these folks, but it did cause me to think of another top ten: Top ten responses from GZ (and their meanings) 10) We have not received your fiancee¡¯s files. (NVC said they sent them to us, but we can¡¯t find them among the 6,000 files already received.) 9) NVC no longer uses diplomatic pouch to send files to us. (We have a sweetheart deal with DHL. They charge us an arm and a leg, but they just put the stuff in regular mail.) 8) The instruction packet will be mailed next week. (You guess which month, ok?) 7) The instruction packet has been mailed. (We used your address in the US from 18 months ago, ok?) 6) The files are delayed in customs. (We can¡¯t seem to get this right ¨C paperwork? What paperwork? You mean Beijing wants us to file something?) 5) Please don¡¯t follow up for 5-7 business days as this will delay our response. (Come on, we dare you.) 4) Please provide us with the address in Chinese characters (We dare you to us our email form which only accepts pinyan, and faxes aren¡¯t read ¨C send it regular mail so we can have some breathing room.) 3) We have not received your fiancee¡¯s files. (This time, we actually have the files, but we like to screw with you.) 2) We have received your fiancee¡¯s files. (Just kidding) 1) We do not make mistakes. (We¡¯re the government. Of course we don¡¯t make mistakes. You read the prior emails incorrectly. No, they are not contradictory. They¡¯re written in govspeak. Let us translate them for you. Still waiting for the translation? Good. Send us a follow up email in 5-7 business days.)

I could say that home is where the heart is, but this trite expression does not even begin to describe the complexities of life today. Mick, I sense a couple of things. First, many of us have re-invented ourselves over the years. Sounds like you may have done this with your stay in China - a near radical change in lifestyle that you continue to find rewarding. Unfortunately, some of those rewards are 10,000 miles away. Second, the rewards and recognition flowing from a university professorship in China will generally always exceed those found in the states. This is an unfortunate fact. Educators are not considered economic dynamos in this country; hence, their worth is not recognized nearly as much as they should be. In contrast, your status in China as a university professor earned you a respect that you may find lacking in the US. Often, we have to resign ourselves to the fact that work has to be viewed as the means to an end, not the end itself. I try to resist this view, but, sometimes I find myself rationalizing that work only needs to provide me with the means to enjoy my family, maybe not at the economic level we all dream about, but at least at the level that will give me the time to be with those that really matter. Unfortunately, I think it is rare that we end up working in a job or profession that we truly love. Considering that we spend so much time in jobs that do not reward us the way we'd hoped, the quiet desperation syndrome raises its ugly head more than we'd like. I would give my left huevo to be teaching, passing on knowledge and experience to those young sponges eager to absorb. Your sponges are in China, aren't they? Maybe, it's time to think about fishing again.

Got room at the table for one more?

I just sent you a PM

Couldn't agree with you more. and, you'll avoid the side trips on the way there and back, aka "we want your yankee dollar". Our driver offered to take us to these places, and we know he just lost a small commission when we politefully declined. We did gave him a tip to compensate, though, and his side commentary, in English, was well worth the extra cost.

Sorry to hear about mom. Mine is 87 now and almost the exact same thing happened to her while we were vacationing at the beach a few years back. I wish her a speedy recovery. Just curious, is bigfoot proportional? Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on, bra, la la how the life goes on.

While we wait for the ever elusive visa, Jingwen and I have been discussing where to live. These are her preferences: in the city, two stories, red brick, new, five bedrooms, That kinda rules out my current 3 bedroom in-town ranch. Actually, it rules out most in-town houses that I could afford, since I already bought one of those for my ex - only 10 years left on the mortgage. Reminds me of what Lewis Grizzard once said after his fifth divorce. Rather than getting married/divorced again, about every five years, he'd just find some women he hated and buy her a house - cheaper in the long run. But, I digress. City living seems very importatnt to Jingwen and despite lots of photos and chats, I am not sure she fully understands surburban living. Unfortunately, her "dream house" will likely be found in the burbs. Personally, I'm not real enthused about the burbs and the multi hour commutes to the office. Living in-town is my preference. In typical "lao po" fashion, she says she will be happy wherever we live and while I do not doubt her, I do want her desires realized. Over the long haul, I am confident that appreciation in housing prices will eventually allow us to buy up to her dream house in town, but, until then, I struggle with where to start - smaller house in the city vs. larger house in the suburbs. For those of you with your spouses already here, what kind of feedback are you getting about houses and location?

Is it the search box at the bottom right of the tigtag.com home page where it says ÖÐÎĵçÂë²éѯ? Jerry You got it, Jerry. ÖÐÎĵçÂë²éѯ = Chinese telegraphic code search

Congrats. I'm green with envy.

While we're on the subject of food (sorry, MCC, looks like your money is safe), I went on a picnic in Zhanjiang and had some of the best chicken and shrimp to be found. The chicken was whole and warpped in foil, as was the shrimp. Both were cooked slow in an earthen mound along with some sweet potatoes. Man, I thought I was in heaven and it was as close to a outdoor pit roast as I've ever seen. And even better - we used our hands to eat; no chopsticks Bobby, I'd stay away from the spaghetti - something about tomato sauce that doesn't seem to appeal to Jingwen - don't know if it's personal or regional. Go for a good old fashioned cook out, and show them how it's really done. All men know how to grill, right?. But, if you're insistent on doing a low country boil and need some practice, there are several of us here in Atlanta who might be willing to be guinea pigs.

Patrick, I'll take this as good news for you and Li. I hope things go more smoothly for you now.

Great to hear the good news, Jerry. You're getting close to the end. Keep the faith.

right now, I am assuming that my fiancee's P3 is MIA. do you think she could go to GZ and pick hers up? GZ said they mailed hers on 11/3 and repeated faxes and emails have yielded squat.

Given the recent post about the need for a tape showing communication in Chinese, this is again a relevant topic. At the beginning, for me, it was a "family affair". Several of the nephews are college educated and spoke very good English. Unfrotunately, Jingwen was not, so everybody had a hand in helping us communicate at first. Being fiscally conservative, Jingwen wanted to have her kids take English lessons so she could learn from them. Not the best idea, but understandable. Today, we speak Chinglish, and her English is passable. My Chinese is actually a little better than her English, and our everyday conversations rarely present a problem with this and electronic translators. When there is very important information to pass on, like what to expect in the P3, I will send her an email both in English and Chinese - in English just in case she wants to have it translated by a professional. Latey, she has been recording our on-line chats with her camcorder just in case a question is asked about how we communicate. Unfortunately, I sometimes forget that I am on camera and start talking about distance and desires and other things that may be a bit too personal for publication. But, hell, I'd stand naked in front of the VO if I had to. As a precautionary measure, since I will be in Guangzhou for the interview, we will also tape a conversation in advance - just in case. Given the volume of real time chats (text copies of all Yahoo chats), I hope that this will be sufficient. Communication is very important in a relationship. And, what I have found out is that, as communications skills improve, so does the depth of the relationship. I can just imagine what it will be like when Jingwen speaks as well as any American. I just hope she doesn't pick up too much Southern slang in the process. The first time she calls me bubba will be the first time I'll consider moving from the South.

Like some of you, I am still waiting to actually received the P3. GZ says they sent it, but Jingwen hasn't received it yet. Addresses have been confirmed in English and Chinese via email and fax, but still no P3. Does anyone know if it would be possible to go ahead and file the various P3 forms now? This would not be an attempt at a provisional file since GZ has the files (or so they say). This would not be an attempt to circumvent the system if we believe that GZ actually sent the forms. Rather, this would be an attempt to correct what appears to be a problem with EMS. I have this sinking feeling that the pit will be knocking at my door again if I don't do something soon.

Ah, gotcha.. then put me on the "Clawing his way out of the pit" list Same here. Jingwen has yet to receive the P3. Email correspondence with GZ led me to believe that they sent it to the wrong address - no admission on their part, just a request for her address in Chinese, which they should already have. This request resulted in a fax to GZ with the info. Still no P3 in hand

Absolutely. Another hurdle cleared. Good luck with the P3 and P4.

Anyone notice that Dave has only come up for air twice since he's been back. The house must have been really dirty.

Sorry, you guys have it all wrong. It is neither LIFO nor FIFO. It is FIST - First In Stays There

very good news indeed, and welcome to Candle

6 months I know how happy you are. Congratulations. Go ahead and call her

Fantastic news. The pit crew numbers are shrinking.

I got unlucky yesterday. Found out the GZ sent the P3 to the wrong address. I've now given them the correct address (again), so Jingwen is still waiting for the actual receipt. Maybe in the next few days I can change my timeline to reflect receipt of the P3.

Congratulations!!!!!!! That light at the end of the tunnel has the glow of a visa, yes?

you can check the guidelines at: http://uscis.gov/graphics/formsfee/forms/f...iles/I-864p.pdf For a family of two, the 125% amount is $15,150 for the continental US. At $1,200/month, you'll fall short.