Take it easy we are just Kidd'n you

[Thomas Promise]

Over the past several weeks I have received some good natured and not so good kidding around by friends and associates about being engaged to a Chinese Woman. Of course some of the questions are why???? Tom why not get involved with an American Woman right here locally? What do you see in a Chinese woman? What do want to have a submissive little Doormat? An ex-old girl friend even called me when she heard about my plans and asked what I saw in a lesser person! ( In her statement she is partially right by about a 120 pounds lesser. A real genuine F-250 there & made in America).

My response to these questions is: I fell in love with a Woman who happens to be Chinese. Look at our Great Country I am of Italian Heritage and my ex-wife came from German-Irish backround, That guy and his wife over there one is English and she is Polish etc. So what is wrong with a Chinese Spouse? Is it Ignorance? Jealousy? Fear? On these peoples part. A very good friend of mine has got engaged to a Lovely Chinese Lady from China last week. He does not think of her as a Chinese Woman but only as a woman he fell in love with, his future Wife and very best friend.

Any help on this topic would be really appreciated. Thanks.

[chef4u]

Thomas, I believe somewhere in the past I saw this same question posed. I believe it was by Dennis. Unfortunately I am not that computer savvy to copy post that thread here for you to review. Maybe some one remembers that thread and can post it here for you as a easy reference. But, your friend is correct as far as I am concerned. Now, our world is quite close to each other. It is indeed the woman, not her origin, race, religion or political view that should matter. It is the person that matters. I remeber as a young teenager my parents telling me that they could only date Sicilian's. They could not even marry an Italian. So, I hope we can all get by this West Side Story stigma and concentrate more on the individual person. My first wife was Jewish....I am Sicilian. My second wife was Japanese....I am a Sicilian. My soon to be wife is Chinese......I am Sicilian. So you know what....who cares...I don't. Never did and never will. So, my soon to be wife is a unique person who is very special to me and I am a very unique person who is very special to her. What other people think??? Well, I quess there special too

Edited October 16, 2005 by chef4u (see edit history)

[Dennis143]

OK, here you go....

 

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=12323

[esun41]

I live in Southern California... Does everyone have the same ethnic background here? No way...

 

I see a person of Asian background and wonder of the heritage (Korea, Philippines, China etc...) I see Hispanic and wonder Mexico, El Salvador, etc... My heritage is swedish but I've never been to Sweden. (Too cold)

 

This Nation was founded on the ideals of freedom and diversity... this is what makes it so great.

 

In my eyes... we all are of one maker... GOD! (One Nation Under!)

[david_dawei]

Always an interesting topic ! and I've got a few to show, and another good one started by Dennis.. .least he forgot

 

 

Why Did/Do You Pursue a Chinese SO Woman, Please, only men answer, thanks

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=10489

 

 

Your friends and family, how do they deal with your decision

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=12662

 

 

If my wife is a "mail order bride", then?

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=8238

[LeeFisher3]

Tom, you could always mention that you finally found someone who not only claims to believe in family values, but lives them every day. This is not a trait often found in the US these days.

 

When they mention submissive you should just bust out laughing and ask them where they heard that fable. I firmly believe Chinese woman are more in charge of the value system in the country than most men would admit.

 

You could always mention the divorce rate in China is about 5% compared to 50+% in the US.

 

The comment about lesser person is great, I'd love to ask her how Hitler's master race is doing.

 

Your true friends will welcome and support your decision, the others need to reconsider what friendship means. Those who are not able to have an open mind are not worth the time.

 

You got a great lady Tom and anyone who is not willing to accept that doesn't deserve your time or energy.

[ptcrusier333rph]

some people will never understand or ever want to, just let them move on. Lost a friend over this topic after marrying my SO. but I gain a Better friend in my SO.

 

Robert

[warpedbored]

I was recently asked by a woman."couldn't you find an American girl?" As if I am such a loser that no American woman would want me and I had to settle for a lesser foreign model. I have no patience with such idiots. There will always be close minded bigots who don't know how to keep their mouths shut. This is a good time to find out who your friends really are. Drop the racists like a hot rock.

[Yuanyang]

Tom, you could always mention that you finally found someone who not only claims to believe in family values, but lives them every day. This is not a trait often found in the US these days. ...

We've become a nation of talkers and not doers certainly when it comes to The Family.

 

I've only had two people ask "Why?" and I've refused to dignify the question with a response; but rather give them a "How Dare You Ask" look.

[HanLi]

the true test is with each other, if others can't see the shared values.... that is their loss.........

[jtaylo69]

First let me commend each and every one of you for not just making possibly one of the best decisions of your life, but also for having the balls to back up your decision, regardless of family or friends. I know it is a very difficult decision to have to make, but in the end, you really do gain a better person, a better friend, and a far better mate that one could ever find in the States.

 

Now, should you at any time feel that you have made even the slightest error on your part, let me help to remind you as to why you took this first step in becomming a far better person in the first place.

 

While you were in the USA, Please ask your self these questions:

 

1) When was the last time you met, shook hands, broke your neck, or droped your jaw by looking at a so called Perfectly made American Woman? You know the type: Boob Job, Butt Job, a face lift or two, that prissy litte walk, that "I'm all that" strut, enough make-up to make Tammy Fay Cry with Jealousy, the Attitiude from Hell as if to say, "You can't afford this piece of ass, so don't even bother", or (if you are rolling in the Benjamines) the swarms of ladies constantly attempting to try & get your attention.

 

Well guess what? When they said, MADE IN AMERICA, well, these ladies are more than likely to be the only TRUE THING left that is ACTUALLY MADE IN AMERICA. Thats right, I said it. They may have been bread in America, But everything else was Made. Attitude, the Drive for the Money, and oh yeah, that boob job.

 

When was the last time you ever saw such a woman cook a meal, clean a house, wash a dirty dish, much less, bring a guy a cup of coffee? That's right, NEVER!

 

When was the last time you ever seen such a woman truely and sincearly touch or hold her man like she MEANT it? Nope, Never. Not going to happen in this life time (unless she's needing more money for that tummy tuck)

 

When was the last time you ever heard of an American woman just sitting down with her American man just to carry on a CIVIL conversation, or talking about HIS NEEDS? Yeah Right. Wake up, You're Dreaming

 

When was the last time you heard of an American woman Insulting every other woman out there claiming that the other woman was NOT REAL and ONLY she was a REAL WOMAN? YUP!! You guessed it, EVERY SINGLE DAY OF OUR STINKING LITTLE LIVES.

 

2) When was the last time you looked at a Chinese woman and said to yourself "HOLY SHIT!! Damn!! or WOW" and did everything you could to break your neck just to get a better look? Do you know why?

 

Because here is a woman that is 110% Bonified & Truely a SELF MADE WOMAN! That's why.

 

NOPE! No plastic, no silicon, no buckets of paint or plaster, no fillers, no additives. Just 110% Pure Woman, in all of their true beauty and glory. Just as god made them to be.

 

YES! They have an attitude. But you know what, it's that Attitude that helps to remind us that THEY ARE ALIVE, THEY ARE THE REAL DEAL, and THEY ARE THE REAL REASON why we fell in love with them.

 

Although they may be a bit shorter than most. Although they may be a bit more reserved than most. Although they may be a bit more assertive than most. I have yet to find any other speicies of a woman who could ever come close to filling a Chinese Womans Shoes.

 

Here's why:

 

SHEs:

 

Always happy to see you in the morning

Always pays attention to what you are saying

Always listens to your concerns

Always looking out for you best wellfare

Always ready to defend YOUR honor

Always making sure you had pleanty to eat

Always making sure you have something clean to wear

Always making sure that you look just right to be seen in public

Always ready and willing to do what ever she can to make your home a loving and respectable home

Always ready to be your friend

Always ready to be the Best Damn lover you have ever wanted or will ever need

Always willing to try something different with out complaints

Never going out of her way to put another down or insult another

Never making it a point to prove to you that SHE IS ALL THAT & that YOU Better Not Forget It.

Never intentionally insulting or embarrassing you in front of family & friends

Never letting you leave the house with a bad attitude

Never letting you go to bed uspet

 

and Last but not the Least....

 

SHE's ALWAYS letting you know Just how much she loves you

 

NOW, Try and get that from an American woman. If you can, well WAKE UP!! YOU ARE DREAMING, as it will never happen. Not in this life time, Not Ever.

 

And That My Friends, IS WHY I'D CHOOSE AN CHINESE WOMAN OVER AN AMERICAN WOMAN, ANY TIME!!

[finenn]

Over the past several weeks I have received some good natured and not so good kidding around by friends and associates about being engaged to a Chinese Woman. Of course some of the questions are why????

I just ask why did you marry an american woman?

[Dennis143]

Damn jtaylo69, I was rightfully scolded by Amber for my teasing remarks about American women. Sure hope she doesn't read this post.

Edited October 17, 2005 by Dennis143 (see edit history)

[shimaore]

And That My Friends, IS WHY I'D CHOOSE AN CHINESE WOMAN OVER AN AMERICAN WOMAN, ANY TIME!! 

161075[/snapback]

well some of the american women are our mothers / sisters or aunts - right ? difficult to generalise , american women have as much qualities as chinese women ( and vice - versa ) just some people are attracted to certain qualities and other to other qualities .

Now my little observation, male from my community who emigrated to the USA and got married with American women ( compared to those who married within the community ) are a lot more ambitious / have better communication skills ( non-english speaker ) and integrate quicker to the society at large. All this qualities are down to their girlfriends or wifes who happen to be american women_

[jtaylo69]

Well, I still stand by what I said, No Matter what. & here is why:

 

At age 40, I have had the oppertunity to date just about every facet of ladies the the US could come up with;

 

Big Gals

Little Gals

Tall Ones , Short Ones,

Rich Ones, Poor Ones

White, Black, hispanic, Italian, Phillipeno, French, Dutch, German and even Chinese American.

 

None of which had the True Family Morals, the Honesty, the Dignity, entegraty nor the respect or know how to treat their man or how to truely respect his family or friends.

 

They were either caught up in themselves, into drugs in one form or another, too busy to care about anything but themselves, played the Poor Pitiful me card, If you can't afford me then you don't need me card, their family was far more important than trying to make a lives for ourselves, played the Racist card or was a racist, felt that children should be seen & not heard, deotorant was somthing for only well off folks, a weekly bath was all that was needed, could or would bend over in the middle of a park, drop trow & could piss through a hoop 20 yards away, fasion was everything. the list goes on & on.

 

Now granted, we all have mothers, sisters Aunts etc. But most of them as we know it, were brought up through the OLD SCHOOL where family values, a ladies dignity and the love for her mate were Sincear, honest & true in their truest forms.

 

But unfortuantely, Many of our Sisters, daughters etc, have grown away from those teaching as "ITS TOO OLD FASION" or "Get with Reality, this is a new century" Shit isn't like that any more, what world are you living in" type of attitude.

 

So for me, all I can say to them is: Hate your luck, you cry all day wishing your ship would come in like that of what you see on tv, all of the while crying why cant you ever find a guy like that?

 

Well, if you would quit trying to impress all of your girlfriends on how much of a bad ass, self susficiant woman that you are, You just might have a chance at seeing a passing ship upon which you could get top know. But until you drop all of that BS, your head will still be left in the fog, and while you are busy trying to figure out how you got there in the first place, all of us good guys have gone to better fishing grounds.

 

Hate your Luck, but you've missed the Boat.

 

 

Just my thoughts for what they are worth