Sam and Fen

Technically I am Asian too, maybe not in the American defination of "Asian" All Asians push their kids very hard to do well in school. The main reason for this is that most Asian countries are over populated with very few oppportunites to make it big in life. If you do well in school you can get into Med or Engineering school and have a good future but if you don't and end up studying the Arts or Economics you really do not have much of a future. This was very true in the past but with the economies of countries like China and India doing very well this is slowly changing. Most of us "Asians" who are 30+ something have been bought up that way and that is why we presuure our kids to do well in school. My daughter today is studying Bio-Pshycology at Purdue so the pressure that was put on her by her momma in school has certainly paid off. The other reason is we "Asians" like to boast about how well our kids have done in school and in life. Failure of a child for us is failure of us as parents. What can I say it is in our DNA.

Just two words of advise Lorena Bobbit.

My wife did something as stupid but we got lucky. When she first came here she decided to walk to the mall to do some shopping while I was at work. She found a pair of jeans that she liked that were on sale, buy one get one 1/2 off or something like that. She only wanted one pair but to get the deal she convinced another shopper to pay togather (how she did this with almost no english skills remains a mystery). Well the other lady paid for both, my wife gave her the money and the other woman gave my wife her jeans and left. My wife hung around the store for a while to see if there was anything else she liked and when she was done she went back up to the counter to get a bag for her purchase. The cashier asked to see the recipt which the other lady took with her. My wife was trying to convince the cashier that she was not stealing and it was a legitimate purchase. Fortunately for her the other cashier who had seen the transaction between my wife and the other lady happened to walk by and let my wife off the hook.

There is a new show on Broadway called Chinglish that deals with a lot of these issues in a funny way. My wife did not like the show but I was splitting up and most of us that have a Chinese wife and have dealt with "Lost in translation" issues will find this show very entertaining.

I have been thru this unfortunately. It is very important for a Chinese woman to work and not ask the Husband for anything especially Money. When my wife first came here she was looking for work and went around to all the stores in our negibhourhood. Her first job was working at a gift shop owned by a Chinese Couple, she made $4/hour (half the minimum wage) and they only worked her when they had a delivery come in so she could do all the heavy lifting. We tried to find jobs at a few Super Markets but she was never hired because she ain't a Latino. She wanted to work as a nanny and almost everything was very far away from where we live and I just said No way. Like some said she did not come 9000 miles to stay away from me. I finally called in a favor and got her a job at Kohls and after the holiday season they cut her hours and I was spending more money at bars then she was making just waiting to pick her up. All this time she was talking about a job at a factory where 99% of the employees are Asian's of every stripe especially Chinese. I was not keen on this job because she would primarily be communicating in Chinese and not English and that would hurt her ability to learn English. I finaly relented and she has been working there for about a year now. She works the second shift and it has drastically cut into the time we spend togather but as they say pick your battles. So it is really up to you, If you feel very strongly about this then it is a battle worth fighting (I did). The other suggestion I have is put some money into her account as a loan and tell her she can pay you back when she finds a job closer to home. Good Luck buddy. You are between a rock and a hard place.

Hi Carl Hope you are doing better now. I wanted to share my experience with you and others and I hope this helps you all. My Blood Sugar has been high for the last few years but my A1C was normal. When I checked it the last time my A1C was border line normal and my Blood Sugar was around 250 making me a prime candidate for Diabetes. So my Nag Bag has had enough of my ignoring it and took matters in her own hands and I am happy to report that in the last month my Blood Sugar levels have dropped to around 200 in the mornings and around 170 in the afternoons. Here is what she did and boy it has worked: 1. Cut out all sugar from my diet, no cookies,cakes,ice cream (dammmmmmmm I love sweets) 2. Very minimal Potatoes or Rice. 3. NO BEER so I switched to Scotch (it is the only liquor that does not have sugar) 4. Guava Leaf Tea. If you go to any Chinese medicine store in China town you can buy these leaves. Boil these leaves in water for about 2 hours and drink it. I have been drinking 3/4 cups of this stuff every day. I have found for best results drink the tea an hour after a meal. I Googled this and there is more then enough evidence that this thing works. The fruit itself is very effective also, just avoid the skin which tends to increase Blood Sugar. Bitter Lemon is also good as it has natural plant Insulin but I can not stand that stuff. One other thing that I learn' t tough I have not tried it yet is Cinnamon is very good to control Blood Sugar, Triglycerides and also helps Cholesterol. Boil Cinnamon in its powder form in water and drink it, even sprinkling some on your cereal in the mornings will help. Cinnamon in excess of a tea spoon full in a day can be harmful. If any of your wife needs to talk to my wife about how to make this tea drop me an email at scubegroup@xxxxx.com. Good Luck.

Good to hear. Hope things go smoothly this time around.

A lease is a legally binding document and it is very common for different tenants to pay different rents. I doubt if a lawyer will be able to anything, but he/she will gladly take your money. If you are buying your own place I would suggest just moving on and dealing with breaking the lease. Congratulations and good luck with your own home, trust me you are going to have bigger headaches but they will be worth it.

Welcome to CFL and congratulations. Finally!!

I would suggest putting PPTV on your computer. And oh yes practice saying "Yes Dear".

Sorry could not resist that. Good luck Tsap I will be thinking of you and your wife.

Yeah, If a Chinese web site says it then it must be true. Wonder when USCIS will know that they are wrong.

My wife came alone too. POE: JFK. No questions asked. It was a breeze.

Ok, my two MAO...but please don't anyone comment with the old and tired..."Two Mercedes Comments". Air China is one of the three or four airlines I PREFER TO FLY. Here is the place where an oft handed comment would come - I ALWAYS FLY BUSINESS OR FIRST CLASS. Additionally, when I originate in Hawaii - Air China has a convenient flight to Taipei - then I can quickly connect with them or Cathy to HK and then home in Xiamen. Unfortunately the quick flight from Hawaii arrives too late in the morning to avail oneself to the direct flight that recently was allowed - as it leaves at 8:30 AM...direct to Xiamen - eliminating the HK portion. OK, I find the following in business/first in terms of best service - comfort etc.....Korean, EVA/China Air, JAL, Thai, Air China. (I have limited experience with Singapore Air who I have heard has good service. I avoid, if at all possible, flying on US Carriers - with the exception of Hawaiian or Alaska Air. Unfortunately, the routes are limited. ALSO...just flew from Hawaii to RNO via SFO - on United. OMG - what a disaster in First Class.....food terrible, all but one flight attendant so cranky she was almost as bad as ME...with a 6 month old in my arms. Delay in SFO for 3:15 HRS....OMG just shoot me if I go on United Again...I quit them 20 years ago....and I caved in to my wife who wanted the most direct flight. (My choice was FREE 1st Class with Hawaiian to SAC then drive home.....saves money time etc..) Enjoy...the Asian Airlines they are worlds above the US airlines who have forgotten what service is all about! Bingo! I avoid flying domestic airlines as much as I can. Asiana is the best I have ever flown followed by Cathay. My kids have flown Singapore and they were raving about it. The quality of the service on these Airlines is far superior to any domestic airlines.

Not sure if the A# is on the Biometrics notice but you will need that or the SSN#

Jim, being postal is very easy to do...I lived a long time in postal mode, almost like I wasn't happy if I wasn't angry All my anger and bitterness never got a damn thing done for me, but oh how I loved those rages, it was such fun looking at the dark side of everything, yelling at people, crying poor me, and bemoaning the fact that the world was against me. Somehow my wife has changed me, and she has changed too....I used to kid her about her beautiful strong legs...I told herthat her legs were so strong because she always "jumped to conclusions" usually negative conclusions. This trial we have been forced into and still must live, added in with the love that has grown within us has changed us both. Somehow our love has changed us both from the people we were. In a weird way this nightmare we have been given has made us both grow up. I am in awe of the power of love and how it has changed us. Before, the stupidity of my application being sent back for something the case worker had right in front of them, clearly indexed and labeled according to the USCIS's own written instructions would have had both of us going ballistic, today, we calmly discussed it, even laughed about it. We understand our goal, we both understand what it takes to keep our focus, even when idiotic bullshit is being thrown at us by the downright criminal acts of the American government. It would be so easy to be angry....why is anger such an easy emotion? Why does happiness in the face of adversity take so much work? Are we all programed to be angry first, with happiness coming in a distant second? I can only humbly say, thank God for our strong love to sustain us. America is one strong country, but they are so powerless in their stupidity with our denial, the 10 months they waited to deny us, the 11 months it took them to send our case back to USCIS, and now this stupid act with my application. America cannot break our spirit and our love...they may have big bombs and big talk, but they are powerless against twopeople who have found love and are commited to each other. This crap is nothing more than a flea bite from a flea whose brain is so small it takes a microscope to see it. tsap seui I may wind up on Opra before this is over with....these jokers are really giving a ton of evidence andbuilding a strong case as to the lunacy in the DOS and USCIS when it comes to "legal" immigration. What a sad state of affairs our country has lowered itself to when a talk show host has more power than the US government. You sir are a better man then I am. I would be going ballistic if I were in your shoes. If you need a good laugh read my ACH You are too funny, SamIam. In all honesty, I am no better man than you or anyone else, just laser focused on my goal, buddy. If being ballistic would help me to achieve my goal, I would have already been the largest intercontinental BALLISTIC missle known to mankind. What I am talking about Tsap is "Grace under Fire", I would not have that.

Jim, being postal is very easy to do...I lived a long time in postal mode, almost like I wasn't happy if I wasn't angry All my anger and bitterness never got a damn thing done for me, but oh how I loved those rages, it was such fun looking at the dark side of everything, yelling at people, crying poor me, and bemoaning the fact that the world was against me. Somehow my wife has changed me, and she has changed too....I used to kid her about her beautiful strong legs...I told herthat her legs were so strong because she always "jumped to conclusions" usually negative conclusions. This trial we have been forced into and still must live, added in with the love that has grown within us has changed us both. Somehow our love has changed us both from the people we were. In a weird way this nightmare we have been given has made us both grow up. I am in awe of the power of love and how it has changed us. Before, the stupidity of my application being sent back for something the case worker had right in front of them, clearly indexed and labeled according to the USCIS's own written instructions would have had both of us going ballistic, today, we calmly discussed it, even laughed about it. We understand our goal, we both understand what it takes to keep our focus, even when idiotic bullshit is being thrown at us by the downright criminal acts of the American government. It would be so easy to be angry....why is anger such an easy emotion? Why does happiness in the face of adversity take so much work? Are we all programed to be angry first, with happiness coming in a distant second? I can only humbly say, thank God for our strong love to sustain us. America is one strong country, but they are so powerless in their stupidity with our denial, the 10 months they waited to deny us, the 11 months it took them to send our case back to USCIS, and now this stupid act with my application. America cannot break our spirit and our love...they may have big bombs and big talk, but they are powerless against twopeople who have found love and are commited to each other. This crap is nothing more than a flea bite from a flea whose brain is so small it takes a microscope to see it. tsap seui I may wind up on Opra before this is over with....these jokers are really giving a ton of evidence andbuilding a strong case as to the lunacy in the DOS and USCIS when it comes to "legal" immigration. What a sad state of affairs our country has lowered itself to when a talk show host has more power than the US government. You sir are a better man then I am. I would be going ballistic if I were in your shoes. If you need a good laugh read my ACH

Maybe she does have a legitimate Chinese drivers license!

As is the service. There are only 6 "5 Star" airlines in the world. Cathay, Asiana, Singapore , Malaysian , Kingfisher (All Asian airlines) The only non Asian airlines on the list is Qatar. Surprise none of the US carriers are on that list.

Just to refresh your memory:

My wife came on Air China. GUZ-PEK_JFK. She said they were pretty good. You can also check reviews by passengers.

Maybe you can have him send letters at your work address. This way the wife does not know you got a letter and avoids the mop slaps.

Hehehehe you are screwed. There should be no secrets between a husband and wife but on the other hand you don't want to betray your sons trust. Oh what a tangled web we weave.

Maybe popping my chest buttons will match popping my belly buttons! Please don't go below the belly buttons. We really don't need to know.

Ying was, as expected "afraid of", but she is very proud now. She is jealous that he writes me three letters to her one. It was pretty rough in the beginning, but as time goes on she has accepted the "concept" if not the reality of John's independence. In fact, that was a strong influence on John in the first place: join the Marines and get the hell away from an over-protective mom. Among other things. I think that she has grown used to the idea now. My pride and defense of John and his actions and decisions are having the desired results. Kudos to you Steve... Thanks! One of the points I want to make with this thread is that through his Herculean effort and fortitude John is overcoming significant barriers to achieve things that I can only live through vicariously. (Thanks Son ) Things like physical - he's not the biggest guy. Language - he's about intermediate. Maturity - He's still a kid by U.S. standards. But, he is doing it. He makes me strong. And it just goes to show that no matter how devastating or disastrous things appear, one can do it! Bingo! Congratulations on a job well done.