Steve and Qingqing

I dissagree that All american dvds and cds are pirated.. The ones That are in Wal Mart and the dvd stores, bookstores in the Major Malls I highly doubt are bootlegs.. there prices reflect legal copies... Those retailers had no current movies for sale except Wal Mart had Jet Li's "Unleashed "and that was because its considered a Chinese movie, not american.

On both of my trips back from China, I had about 40 dvds with me.. 60% american releases... I declared them on the customs form.. Never questioned or stopped... I wouldnt worry about it, but if you are then mail them back to your son... One more thing. you have a 800 limit, your So would only have a 200 limit since shes not an american citizen.

Youd have better luck having your SO just walk over from Mexico then trying to get a visitors visa..Sad that the gov makes being legal so much harder than being illegal.

A single chinese female has vurtually no chance of ever getting a visitors visa..In our governments eyes, a single young female, especially out of college, to them they believe america looks to good to ever want to go back to China and so they believe they will stay once here.. You must prove that you have strong family ties that will make you go back to get a visitors visa or property .

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Our first meeting at the Beijing Airport. Seeing a huge crowd of people gathered waiting for their loved ones.. Not seeing my love until I cleared the crowd and saw her beautiful brown eyes and loving smile as I smiled back, she rushed into my arms, holding me tightly we embraced as she buried her face against my chest We exchanged I love you's and it felt so perfect and still does...

Personally, I think each and everyone of us here are the lucky ones to find true love.. Thank you all for your comments.

Heres a question my SO asked me to ask all of you. when shes finally here, what is the procedure for getting her parents a tourist visa to the USA? How can we help? How long will it take? Thank you.

Unfortunately my job just went through a layoff and the thought of being away from work for another two weeks is dangerous. We also want to save the last two weeks I have for the wedding and honeymoon.

Again, David is right on track with the way she is thinking...Its going to be scary for her to look for a job in a foreign land let along do it in a second language your not confortable speaking.. She sees this as a great opportunity but wasnt understanding that theres really no time to pursue the venture. She doesnt want to wait any longer than she has to to be together. She doesnt want a Chinese wedding either. Nor go K-3 and have to wait to be with me longer.. She basically has answered her own question on what to do..Her motive has always been to have the best life for the both of us...She even once said that if she ever got a job better than mine, I could stay home and go to the movies and not work. ( Please can I get this in writing!)..... She wants a happy life together... one that allows us the luxury to travel often...The opportunity just would possibly made it easier for her to find work here, she is also not certain when it comes to her abilities even though everyone has told me she shouldnt have any problems finding a good career.. By the way, she has a masters degree in inorganic Chemistry from Xiamen University. Oh and has been trained on a DNA microscope!

Im located in Dallas right now. I lived in Houston back in 1973 for 6 years. Dallas also has a large asian population ( over 20,000 in North dallas alone) Just the other day, I picked up a copy of the Dallas/Chinese Yellow pages and thumbed through it. Interesting.. even has all the Becoming a Citizen questions in the back plus a drivers manual in chinese for Texas. I will pass on your post to her about Houston.. Dave,thats so true.. Im sure she would go crazy if she isnt busy...

Dave, she is concerned about having to do an english interview with any company, hense one reason this looks good to her. We both agreed that the USA is the best place for us to be in the distant future, especially since I would be limited in opportunities in China. She will finish her current contract and hopefully get a nice recomendation letter from them. Not sure if that would even matter to a US company but couldnt hurt. We also talked about everything else that will be talking place once shes here..wedding, filing more papers, learning the area, learning to drive or mass transit. a job would be nice for her to have soon but im really not concerned if she takes her time in finding one. Support is not an issue. I make well above the poverty level. I would like her to take her time and find one she really wants...Not feeled pressured into one. Neither one of us wants to be apart any longer than necessary. She feels this whole process is already way too long!

Its not crystal clear but for you if you were in this situation.The reason we even posted the question here. If it fails then it means 1 -2 more years or longer has gone by and we are not together. We have know each other since 2002 and we dont want to wait another year. We would like to get on with our lives together. Had this job come along a year ago , then their wouldnt have be an issue..Its not an issue on whos right or not, its whats best for the both of us that matters. She is still young and will have many more opportunities for a prosperious career. We will marry, thats not in question here.. but we dont want to start all over with a K-3 now and wait again. As for the proper thing to do, thats why we started the K-1 in the first place... To get married and have a life together as husband and wife together not on opposite sides of the world. This is a decision we BOTH will make together..Its not a question of me TELLING her what we will do.

Dave is right. Its an opportunity for her.. She has never lost sight of whats most important and that is us being together. She expressed to me today that she doesnt wish to stop the K-1 that weve already started. Ive mentioned that there will be other opportunities that will come along for her and that we are never limited to just being in Texas forever. We also agreed it couldnt hurt to talk with this manager although she feels hes looking to fill some positions now.. She doesnt want me to move to China just for this job either. We both still feel that the USA is best for our situation in having a better live together..I suggested moving there in our last conversation. So for now, we will continue on with the path we've chosen

Thank you all for your advice.. we talk everyday and usually twice a day by phone....I mentioned my concerns over this again..Suggesting that going back on a fiancee visa for a job to get a job in america wouldnt look well in the VO eyes when it came time for the AOS interview.. They are trying to weed out false relationships based on those only wanting to come here for work...the visa isnt a work visa we are applying for.. its a relationship based visa and not being here once married doesnt show a strong relationship foundation for a new marriage. I think had she had this opportunity at the beginning of this process, when we first filed or even right out of college, the risk might be worth taking.. but now when we are almost finished, I really dont want anything to come along that could jepordize (excuse spelling) everything weve accomplished so far. not to mention being permanatly banned from the USA if your AOS interview is denied because of this..She told me that if I dont want her to do this then she wont pursue it... I told her everything youve all said and have mentioned that everyone I know doesnt think a smart, ambitious, hard working, master degreed, bilingual, young woman will have any trouble finding a decent job here in the States...but it wouldnt hurt to find out what this manager has to say....I just dont see a company hiring someone for 3 months and transfering them and the thought of having to wait for her for another 2 years only depresses me. I really dont think it will come down to that though.

Your all right when it comes to her thinking of the opportunity of getting a decent job for the future of both of us. Ive talked more in length with her over this and told her she needs more info from this company to make a rational decision that will effect both of us. 1) Will this company offer a transfer to said company in the states? 2) how long after you work for them would you be eligable for a transfer? 3) Where are the location(s) in the USA? im in Texas. If we moved then I would be looking for a new job and it might take sometime for myself to find work that pays the same or close. 4) what kind of money are we talking here? If its less than what I make and a move would mean id be looking for work, is it worth it? Especially if its in a more expensive cost of living area like California or New York. Plus its a risk with no guarentee than once here, this company would keep you on or even transfer you after working with them... I know as of yesterday she was dieing to be with me and couldnt be patient any longer.. She wants me to call the DOS each week...I explained to her how american companies work..based on profit and no loyalty to their employees... no guarentees to anything...Ive seen 8 layoffs at my company in the past 16 years and ive been fortunate to have made it through each one but still realize everyones expendable. I tried to make her understand that if she decides this is really what she thinks is best, then we'd be starting all over on the paperwork and could possibly be waiting another 1 1/2 for nothing.Jobs in America are mostly not contract driven. so theres no set length that a company will keep you around..26 years ago, my father was transfered to Texas. A month later he was let go from Northern Telecom. She feels that since its a Big corporation you have more job security. Not necessarily so. I know she loves me deeply and this has nothing to do with second guessing our relationship..its about security and the feeling of being uncertain of ones abilities in a new country...I dont want to burst her bubble, just let her know is a risk with no guarentees of a future position even if this manager in Shanghai says so.. Companies can and do change their minds all the time... Different i think if your a longtime worker as opposed to a new hire.....well at least theres time to "think" about this....im not even sure how one would start all over if one wanted to.. Do you just cancel your paperwork? Write the embassy? Im sure there have been cases of long delays coming up in the process.... I have showed her Monster.com for jobs and maybe she needs to look their more.....broaden the search to more than Texas....Keep any thoughts/ideas coming and thank you to those that have commented so far.

She feels that this would be a good way to go for being able to get a job when she finally is here. I think she wont have that much trouble finding a good job once shes here with her background. She has a job now but her contract wont finish until December of this year and she'd like to finish it out before doing anything. She hasnt decided on what to do, look into this job offer or not, Her sister told her of the job opportunity so she hasnt spoken to them yet. I will pass on all options to her and of course we will have to decide whats best for us...

ARRGGHH, My So has informed me she has an opportunity to work for an Well Known American company located in Shanghai..We are waiting for our P4 now and only have a few months to go...She was wondering if she got her visa, came here, married me... could she go back and start this job and stay there for awhile till she could get a transfer to one of their locations here in the USA...I told her that she'd have to be here for her AOS interview(s) and thats she couldnt miss it! We are K-1. I also told her if we stop the process now, we would have to start all over and wait another year or longer...She is hoping that it would be a great chance to find a job here easily by working there for them now...I also told her that she would have to work for then at least one year before even mentioning to them that she would like to transfer to the USA company.. that first you have to get in good with them... I know its possible to leave on advance parole after your married on the K-1 but for how long? I doubt you can stay a year in another country.. wouldnt we have to start all over or go K3 and start all over when she was ready to quit this new job ( if she takes it).. She is hoping that if she takes this new job then she wouldnt have to worry about finding work here ... she has a masters degree in Chemistry now....on a personal note... im not thrilled at having to wait for her another 1-2 years if she decides this is a good idea....what do you think.... i think she can find a job here with not that much problem.. she speaks very good english now..

The P3 should get mailed to her but dont be surprised if they mail it to you instead.. They did that to me and a friend of mine last year...Not sure why they decided to send it to me except that maybe it was because my SO has a work mailbox..If you get the package, go through it and make sure the forms are all up to date.. if not, you can download more recent ones from the net... Ours had expired in 2004 so I downloaded the forms that last till 2007...

David, thats not true.. You dont have to listen to each entire message before pressing 1 and the 0's... Ive bypassed the messages each time Ive called and have gotten an officer usually in less than 10mins....works for me... you may have to let the message play for just a second though.

One note on this timeline.. The P3 isnt always sent to the chinese benificary.. The petitioner may recieve the P3 instead as was my case and a friends...Mine actually shipped from Washington DC but had the GUZ address on the label.. Im guessing that since my SO has a work mailbox, they decided to ship the P3 to myself instead of her...We lost about 3 weeks because of this... not knowing for sure if they planned on sending us both copies of P3 or just the papers I recieved. IF you the petitioner do recieve the P3, send it to your SO asap and check the forms to make sure they are the most current..the forms we recieved expired in 2004 so I printed out the new ones with a 2007 expiration date on them.

I would advice against as well. I was married before but it has been about 16 years since then . I had to submit my divorce papers along with the 129 papers..The last thing you need is to give them reason to deny or delay your SO's visa...

Congradulations!!!!!!!!!!!!

Qingqing told me that when I die, she will join me. She said she wouldnt have any reason to go on living if i wasnt around for her to love

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