ptcrusier333rph Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 damn I feel good, got everything together to get passport started tomorrow going to pay extra to get it done sooner robert dancing a jig Link to comment
DaveR Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Great news Robert. I know it will only be a few more months until the wedding. Good luck with the passport and visa. Dave Link to comment
skibum Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Robert, If you are just getting a PP does that mean that you have never met her or was she able to come here. Link to comment
ptcrusier333rph Posted March 30, 2005 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 not met her, but going to spend jan to june next year in china taking classes, it be at least next june or later before she can come back here, she been in china several times and i can fly to hanoi from dalian several times. selling my house this summer and fall and i need some of the classes here out of the way, For me to see her many time will not be a issue, big issue is keeping her mother from arranging another wedding. And not going in as blind as I was on first marriage I know what I want in a woman, and I know Thoa enough to make that judgement. and my feeling I have for her is something I thought I never experience. She already shown her love for me by defying her family. Robert Link to comment
Trigg Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Wahhhhhhooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! Link to comment
Dan R Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Congratulations on the birth certificate. Dalian is very far from Hanoi and tickets are expensive. Isn't there somewhere closer you can go to study? Winter is also very cold there. What about somewhere like Sanya? Is there a reason you don't want to stay in Hanoi? Link to comment
ptcrusier333rph Posted March 30, 2005 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 my college has a campus in Dalian, only cost me the tution about 1200 Us dollars, single occupant, apartment is furnish, the apartment complex is on the campus there and was built 2 years ago, and 250 us dollar living expense for tutoring english for 20 hours a month, only require 9 credit hours of classes oh and they pay for the plane ticket to and from US getting BA in fine arts but getting some of my requirement out of the way there, and my Master will be in Asian art so need to learn chinese as well as viet namese. can't beat having 6 months in china and learning at same time, as well as get to see your wife. was told she can stay with me in Dalian so no problem there. Robert Link to comment
skibum Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Robert, I wish you the best of luck and hope that the two of you will be as happy as my wife and I are. But, please go into this keeping your eyes open. I have had a couple of other e-mail romances and I know you can tell a lot about a person from the mails. But each time when I met them, there was something that made me glad I did not marry them. As I am the oldest member on Candle, I hope you will take some advice as it is intended. I have alway thought that it is a mistake to marry there. A SO should have the chance to experience life in the US before making the big move of marrage. We have seen several cases here on Candle where the woman returns to China in a few months. I think that you also said that she had sister that she would adopt. I think she did not tell you about this until you had set the date. If it was me, I would check very carefully to make sure it is not her child. Yes, I am always suspicious and the only reason I bring all this up is to get you to think as this is a big step. Again, good luck and happiness in the future. Gerald Link to comment
frank1538 Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 I'm glad you finally got the birth certificate thing fixed. Now get that passport and get over there. I wish you luck and hope your expectations and reality are the same when you finally meet. Link to comment
ptcrusier333rph Posted March 30, 2005 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 be kind of hard to be her child she have to be 10 to have her, and I chat with both, the sister not sure what she want yet, her uncle and aunt is starting to take a interest in her which would be good. I have had some online relationship, nothing ever kindle my fire like she has, Also I been lie to by my ex for the whole time we was together, one reason I not dated or not allow anyone close, I talk with her bother and older sister, so far nothing has raise a red flag. And most on here have base their life on one to a few brief moments together, Some have the option of staying for a few years, we don't have the option of being 10 miles apart, and think it strange to be warn of the dangers of marrying from a CFL member, I would expect that coment from someone not going or never will go through the process.If she can't adjust here then I move there, my options are open, getting a degree then go from there. I do not feel I'm making a mistake, first time in my life I feel as if I'm doing it right. I use to go with my gut instinct and it alway been right, only 2 times I gone against it, changing major from art to computer in 1983, and my marriage to my ex both time my gut told me it wrongmy gut tell me this is right. not needing the doom and gloom Robert and Thoa Link to comment
skibum Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Robert, I never said I was against getting married. I just think that the SO should have a chance to live in the US for a while before getting married. I usually go on gut instinct also but I was wrong twice when it came to my first 2 marriges! I am very glad I spent 4 months with my wife before we got married as it gave us a chance to really know each other. Please don't think that I wish you ill will. Nothing is farther from the truth as I really hope everyone who goes on this visa journey has a happy life. I also don't take my own advice as my wife and I were married the day after she got here....... Link to comment
beijingjenny Posted March 31, 2005 Report Share Posted March 31, 2005 Congrats Robert! Great news. Link to comment
ptcrusier333rph Posted March 31, 2005 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2005 no ill will, each person different, andhave to learn for themselves, I'm willing to do what I can to make her life here or there the best we can do. I willing to do what I can to be with her, either here or there robert Link to comment
warpedbored Posted March 31, 2005 Report Share Posted March 31, 2005 No matter how careful you are you never really know until you take the plunge and marry them. Even then you don't really know a person until you divorce them. I thought I knew my ex pretty well but she sure surpised me. My advice? go with the gut but listen to the brain. If a red flag is raised be cautious. Above all be perfectly honest with your loved one about what kind of life style she will have here. If you are a man of modest means make sure she understands that. I knew Bing for 2 years before I married her but only met her twice in person before she came here. We have been married for 10 months now and every day I tell myself what a lucky man I am to have found her. It just keeps getting better. I am indeed a very lucky man. Link to comment
ptcrusier333rph Posted March 31, 2005 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2005 i been in a relationship where it was all lies (ex wife), I been very honest with Thoa, and have been very open with my income and life. I told her to not be afraid to ask me or my family any questions about me, she already been email my sister in california and chatted a few times with my nephew hand thier wives. everyone been told not to hold back on any information she ask. and she been very open with them and me I feel very lucky Robert Link to comment
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