A scary but real story

[tucsonjim]

Jany, thanks for sharing your incredible story. You are a very courageous and strong woman with so much to offer the right man. I hope you find the love you want and deserve. Best of luck to you and Cindy! Please stay in touch. We all care about you very much here at CFL!

[jemmyell]

Hello Jany,

 

It is so nice to hear from you again and for you post your story here for us to read. It brings joy to my heart to hear that you and Cindy are doing well and moving forward with your lives.

 

Our best wishes for you both always,

 

-James and Loving Candle

[eeyore]

Jany,

 

I'm glad to see your still posting and I hope your choice to stay in America turns out to be a good one.

 

You should not blame yourself for what your x-husband did, he lied to you and completely deceived you. That’s his fault and not yours. You should not feel guilty at all, he is to blame for the trouble, not you. I really hope someday you meet a nice guy and have the life you hope for.

 

Good luck and God bless.

 

Thomas

[sawadee]

Jany,

 

Every time I read your story tears come into my eye, and I dont know why, maybe the bad things happened to you make me suffer, maybe the horrible experience scare me, maybe you attitude towards a better life and all the efforts touch my heart, maybe all the love that CFL members give you move me deeply, and this time, I think its the tears happy for the ending of all your fears.

 

Wish you find what you want to find in States, the nightmare has ended forever.

 

Adele

[drive_75]

Jany,

Thank you for sharing your story. I'm glad you are okay now. I'm sure the incident in the wetland isn't for insurance money. You have something priceless that he wants, Cindy.

[pkfops]

Here's the link to Amy Tan's (Joy Luck Club) lecture agent

for anybody who has direct contact with Jany.

 

If this is a story that should be told, I think Amy is

the one who could do the best job.

 

I'm sure it could generate enough revenue for Jany

to make her US journey a successful one.

 

http://www.barclayagency.com/tan.html

[lostinblue]

I don't want to sound harsh,I'm so happy her nightmare ends at last,I'm just wondering why she didn't notice her husband's age on passport and his tax papers before she left china,why she didn't realize it was a big red flag her husband didn't pick them up at airport? what made her blind?

[Jeikun]

I don't want to sound harsh,I'm so happy her nightmare ends at last,I'm just wondering why she didn't notice her husband's age on passport and his tax papers before she left china,why she didn't realize it was a big red flag her husband didn't pick them up at airport? what made her  blind?

222198[/snapback]

Some people become blinded by love, and think they know the other person. Only when looking back on things after it is too late do they realize something should have been obvious.

 

This is another good reason for Jany's story to be told. Not just to share her pain, and her relief at it being over - but also as a warning to some of you Chinese girls, who might have been too trusting, or been worrying about something that didn't match up but were afraid to address it.

[Dennis143]

I don't want to sound harsh,I'm so happy her nightmare ends at last,I'm just wondering why she didn't notice her husband's age on passport and his tax papers before she left china,why she didn't realize it was a big red flag her husband didn't pick them up at airport? what made her  blind?

222198[/snapback]

Some people become blinded by love, and think they know the other person. Only when looking back on things after it is too late do they realize something should have been obvious.

 

This is another good reason for Jany's story to be told. Not just to share her pain, and her relief at it being over - but also as a warning to some of you Chinese girls, who might have been too trusting, or been worrying about something that didn't match up but were afraid to address it.

222201[/snapback]

Amen, Jason. Jany's story is so very important and noteworthy for all Chinese women who seek Western husbands. I hope the word of her story passes through those networks of Chinese women. They cannot simply rely on the new IMBRA law, but must be vigilant to weed out any potential criminal who seek to prey on them.

[tonado]

Jany,

 

Thanks for sharing. People should be careful when dating over the internet.

[JanyNH]

I don't want to sound harsh,I'm so happy her nightmare ends at last,I'm just wondering why she didn't notice her husband's age on passport and his tax papers before she left china,why she didn't realize it was a big red flag her husband didn't pick them up at airport? what made her  blind?

222198[/snapback]

I will let you know why I wanted to share my story here at CFL. Because after I got in troublle. Some members at CFL from all over the USA that I consider brothers and sisters tried all of their best to find the way to help me through the police and they did help me a lot. I survive here with their kindness and love and help. I would like to share my story with these nice American people just like sharing something important with my family. But before the case was over, what I could say was limited. Now the case is over and I can tell them all about the story and let them know more detail about what had happened to the Chinese woman that they had help.

 

It is hard for a foreign woman knowing nothing about the American criminal history checking system to check a man's background. And it is hard for a foreign woman to understand the American tax paper. And if a man intend to lie, he knew how to avoid you checking him out. He must have filed a lot of documents for getting his passport and getting my visa. But the American Immigration Department even didn't find out his background. How could I find it out? It was really hard for me to learn everything about him if he intended to hide something behind you. I think maybe you are just lucky to have an honest and trustworthy person to be your life partner. But not everybody can be lucky like that. This is why something sad happens sometimes.

[JanyNH]

I don't want to sound harsh,I'm so happy her nightmare ends at last,I'm just wondering why she didn't notice her husband's age on passport and his tax papers before she left china,why she didn't realize it was a big red flag her husband didn't pick them up at airport? what made her  blind?

222198[/snapback]

I will let you know why I wanted to share my story here at CFL. Because after I got in troublle. Some members at CFL from all over the USA that I consider brothers and sisters tried all of their best to find the way to help me through the police and they did help me a lot. I survive here with their kindness and love and help. I would like to share my story with these nice American people just like sharing something important with my family. But before the case was over, what I could say was limited. Now the case is over and I can tell them all about the story and let them know more detail about what had happened to the Chinese woman that they had help.

 

It is hard for a foreign woman knowing nothing about the American criminal history checking system to check a man's background. And it is hard for a foreign woman to understand the American tax paper. And if a man intend to lie, he knew how to avoid you checking him out. He must have filed a lot of documents for getting his passport and getting my visa. But the American Immigration Department even didn't find out his background. How could I find it out? It was really hard for me to learn everything about him if he intended to hide something behind you. I think maybe you are just lucky to have an honest and trustworthy person to be your life partner. But not everybody can be lucky like that. This is why something sad happens sometimes.

222250[/snapback]

And when I had my interview at American consulate in Guangzhou, the interview official didn't say anthing about my future husband's criminal history. Because my husband filed false documents.

 

The reason why he was not at the airport to meet with me was because there are 4 terminals at Logan International Airport and he went to the wrong terminal. That was what his mother told me on the phone when I called his home number.

 

I trusted my husband because of his age. He is much more older than me. I thought he should cherish me and he did before I came here. He was very nice to me and to my daughter before we got married. I had never thought he would hurt me and hurt my daughter.

 

Now all I can say is I Wish all the people here including the American husbands and the Chinese wives have the life partner that they really want and enjoy their happy family life.

[chef4u]

I don't want to sound harsh,I'm so happy her nightmare ends at last,I'm just wondering why she didn't notice her husband's age on passport and his tax papers before she left china,why she didn't realize it was a big red flag her husband didn't pick them up at airport? what made her?blind?

222198[/snapback]

I will let you know why I wanted to share my story here at CFL. Because after I got in troublle. Some members at CFL from all over the USA that I consider brothers and sisters tried all of their best to find the way to help me through the police and they did help me a lot. I survive here with their kindness and love and help. I would like to share my story with these nice American people just like sharing something important with my family. But before the case was over, what I could say was limited. Now the case is over and I can tell them all about the story and let them know more detail about what had happened to the Chinese woman that they had help.

 

It is hard for a foreign woman knowing nothing about the American criminal history checking system to check a man's background. And it is hard for a foreign woman to understand the American tax paper. And if a man intend to lie, he knew how to avoid you checking him out. He must have filed a lot of documents for getting his passport and getting my visa. But the American Immigration Department even didn't find out his background. How could I find it out? It was really hard for me to learn everything about him if he intended to hide something behind you. I think maybe you are just lucky to have an honest and trustworthy person to be your life partner. But not everybody can be lucky like that. This is why something sad happens sometimes.

222250[/snapback]

........as I do not know a thing about China's criminal justice system or understand their tax laws. Is there even one American CFL member who can honestly say they understand China's justice and tax laws? Did we not do the same as our sisters in China do? Do we not put our "blind" trust in our SO's when we visit China? I did with my SO!! We all have only a certain amount of information about our future wives/husbands. We can only hope that we chose the right apple.....not the rotten one in the basket!! What happen to Jany is no way her fault!!! There is no way for her to have known about this guy's criminal background!!! As Jany replied...."Even USCIS did not know about this guy's background"....how the hell would you think she would know???

Edited June 7, 2006 by chef4u (see edit history)

[Dennis143]

Nobody blames you, Jany. The blame falls on your exhusband. And, now, may he rot in hell. I simply hope that others can learn from your story and that they can now possibly have better ways of verifying a man's background.

 

Yes Richard, there certainly is much blind faith and trust in these relationships. The differences are; us men may simply get taken by a visa chaser; whereas, the outcome these women face could be much greater consequences. I have never heard of a Chinese woman being a sexual predator of children.

[lostinblue]

dear Jany thanks for your reply,I admire you accpet the fate with philosophy.different people have different opinions cause they look things in different angles,the importance is learn something from it,thank you for sharing the scary story with us,it needed enough bravery,you're strong woman,wish best to you and your lovely daughter