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Secret to a happy marriage


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Interesting Paul. That was part of our problem before. She would constantly remind me of all the things she thought I had done wrong or slighted her with over the past 30 years. Most of it I could barely remember happening.

 

I don't know if it needs to be delusional. Certainly letting go of things is important to success. I am very curious to know a year or two from now how we will be handling this.

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She would constantly remind me of all the things she thought I had done wrong or slighted her with over the past 30 years. Most of it I could barely remember happening.

 

Exactly the pattern with my ex also. I appreciate Luli so much because she is totally incapable of this kind of passive-aggressive subterfuge. If there is something she doesn't like I know about it right away and then it's gone. If I bring it up again and tell her I am sorry she replies, "no sorry." It's dead and done for her and we move on from there... :D :D

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Interesting Paul. That was part of our problem before. She would constantly remind me of all the things she thought I had done wrong or slighted her with over the past 30 years. Most of it I could barely remember happening.

 

I don't know if it needs to be delusional. Certainly letting go of things is important to success. I am very curious to know a year or two from now how we will be handling this.

Did you watch the movie "Fifty first Dates"? The wife's memory is only 1 day old. After she goes to sleep, she forgets everything.

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This really hits home.  My ex wife remembered every little crappy thing I ever did regardless of how trivial.  She would draw them out like a weapon in an arguement.

We should only keep a list of good things our spouses had done. Not like the Santa's list (who is bad).

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In relationships with American women it has always seemed to be about completion, who¡¯s right, who¡¯s fault, who¡¯s in charge, who hurt whom first. No winners in a battle to break the other¡¯s will. :blink:

 

As far as I can tell with Chinese women it seems to be about relationship and caring, if she feels hurt or offended something is said and she normally follows it with ¡°don¡¯t do it again¡± and it¡¯s over. I can¡¯t say that I have felt anything but love from her even when she has scolded me. The only competition I have found is who can bring happiness and joy to the other and in this competition everyone seems to win. :greenblob:

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