Jaseball

I used yesasia before too. Bought the Korean soap opera "Kim Sam Soon," and it was pretty expensive, but hard to find elsewhere. Fast shipping though.

That's awesome. My wife and I both had our first buffalo burgers in AZ about a month ago and we both liked them. Some of the best ethnic food in the US is like that noodle store you talk about. It's probably run by someone who was making the same stuff in their original country and is an expert at it before coming over here to open their own business. That jackalope sounds awesome. Would love to try one.

You already have a long post over in the stories section and several replies talk about culture and give excellent advice. I believe that while cultural differences may cause some friction and not being able to communicate in either English or Chinese is a definite problem the fact remains you have a man and a woman together, married, and in a relationship with all the benefits and problems and issues of marriage and relationships. Women are fairly simple. If it is an honest situation, then a man should honor, support, cherish, and do their best to improve the life of their wife. A good wife does the same thing for her husband. Another important fact that most men don't seem to get - you can't reward bad behavior. If a woman is acting out, constantly whining/complaining, making the guy feel like a loser, and is the opposite of being supportive the worst thing a man can do is beg for forgiveness, apologize, buy her a gift, promise to change, etc. Why? Because in certain situations the guy is not wrong and if he isn't wrong and he caves in, then the woman loses even more respect and instead of being nicer she'll act up even more. Another thing to remember is sometimes a person is not 'fixable.' If you happen to fall for a scammer, a bi-polar, a depressed person, or a sociopath there is nothing you can do to change them and the best you can do is recognize that fact, protect yourself, and move on. Never try to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you. It never works. Always watch out for people that run hot/cold. Supper affectionate and lovey dovey one minute, then ice queen the next. That said, you may see more replies, but with this thread and the other thread with 50+ replies I'm not sure what else you are looking for. You have a total of 11 posts and the first one was about your wife calling the cops and leaving after AOS. This is sort of like buying an old home to fix up, ripping out the kitchen, baths and making the home unlivable by yourself, then asking a contractor to come in after the fact to fix things.

My wife's cousin tells a story about some relatives of her husband who came over to eat at their house in Idaho and she served ribs and the guests just nibbled the best part of the meat off the ribs and did not make an effort to get all the meat. She was so angry at these people that she said she will never have her husband's cousins over to eat again. I think what happened is not only did they not display the kind of appetite and enthusiasm they should for the honor of being invited over to eat, but they displayed a stupid wastefulness. My wife and her cousin gnaw a rib bone down to the bone. These cousins were the kind of petty, spoiled, superfluous excess population that Chinese people have little patience for. You got to respect the intensity at which the Chinese people live. I hate that too. I've found some folks are just reluctant to eat at other people's homes. If they are not in a real restaurant being charged a ton of money they de-value the experience. Some folks are incredibly picky or just don't like anything being served. I had one guy who's been to my house 2x for poker/lunch/dinner parties. Both times he brought drinks over - for himself and he refused to touch any food, except a newly opened pack of potato chips. My other guests were chowing down and happy with the food. Couldn't figure out if this one guy just didn't trust food he didn't prepare on his own or perhaps was Jewish and knew nothing was kosher. Another friend and his entire family doesn't eat leftovers. Once it is prepared and served, that's it. Something newly prepared for the next meal and the leftovers are tossed out. Always hated this aspect of American culture. You know the society is asking for a wake up call when some people are tossing out leftovers that would be more food than other people in poor nations may see in 3-5 days.

Luckily my wife is pretty open to all types of food. I've introduced her to Greek, Mexican, Italian, French, Korean, Japanese, BBQ/Grilling, and a few other 'Made in USA Kitchen,' food from other countries when she arrived. We've also had various well known fast food. She especially likes KFC and fried chicken in general. I am in NCal as well and don't feel Round Table is a good representation of pizza. Some stores offer a decent tasting pie, but for quality and value a small mom and pop store should put RT to shame. In China I kept to street and restaurant food. I love trying different food, styles, and try to eat 'exotic,' stuff like Andrew Zimmer. That guy's probably has a stronger stomach and also gets paid to travel, explore, and eat, so he's got several advantages, but I do my best. We do have some differences. I love pickled and some sour tastes such as Clausen pickles, Chinese style pickled cucumbers, radishes, etc., or Korean side dish type stuff, but I noticed she may nibble a very small piece, but she doesn't like it. In China she loved duck tongues, this silk work type thing, fried pigs feet, and some other choice items. I tried every single one, but have to say it was me nibbling or taking one small portion and her happily chowing down. I pride myself on being a good cook and grill master. We've grilled like crazy, smoked/BBQ'd, and had family and friends over for dinner, while my wife has been more into preparing the Asian style noodles, dumplings, buns, etc. It works out well, but I have to say both of us are sort of food snobs. We've shared the nasty street food like smelly tofu all the way up to Michelin star restaurants and we compare everything from a cost/pleasure/value viewpoint, if we can prepare it at home and if we can, can we do as good or better.

You just have to start documenting now. Not having pictures and not having the passport with stamps already raise red flags. There is no way to check to see if your story is real or even if you two have ever met in person as it stands. The best thing to do is just consider what you need going forward and collect evidence. Doesn't matter if you are camera shy. Take photos with relatives on both sides. Take photos with the daily paper's date showing, in front of a date display a restaurant's specials, in front of a stock ticker with date/time. Having only a few pictures in the same clothes and in front of the same places is also a concern. Having zero pictures is really suspicious. I made sure to snap as many photos as possible of my then fiancee because I knew we would be separated for many months and would only have short visits together when I could go back. When dealing with USCIS it is unfortunate, but we have to think like them and try our best to eliminate their ability to doubt our relationship, our intent, our partner's intent and you have to approach things from the viewpoint that if your case were brought in front of an impartial jury would USCIS win or would you win? The good news is I have been reading and hearing many new filings taking 6-8 months. When I was filing it was at least 12 months and with a delay, like we experienced it took 18 months. If you want to go through with the filing and feel the match is good, it is worth the hassle, wait, and effort. On QQ - Use the video chat. That way you can just talk and see each other and can capture a screen shot of him or you both online. If he doesn't have Internet or the capability to use video, then you have to arrange time for him to go to an internet cafe for video chat. It is worth it, not only for documentation, but being able to see and hear your partner helps a little with being separated. It did in our situation.

Hi. We got a blue slip too when my then fiancee went the first time, but it was for 'past party membership,' which is a pretty crappy one. I expected a 6 month delay while they ran 'additional checks,' and it took 6 months. Your blue slip should not take even 1/2 as long. Best of luck.

You want to file a K1 already? Find the passport. You really shouldn't be without that. May want to try contacting the airline and getting your itinerary or ask if there is anyway to show you were on the flight from HK to the mainland. My first trip to China was for a vacation. I had no plans to meet my now wife, nor did I have a clue about the K1 process. For that first trip I don't remember having much, except passport stamps, my boarding stub from the flight from the US to Taipei and some pictures. I just asked for her phone number and email and said she seemed to be a great girl and I planned on staying in contact. Got a phone card that lists out call day/time/number and printed out monthly sheets of us talking. Used QQ and snapped a pictures each time we went online to chat. Had her write me letters and wrote letters and kept those. I did make a second trip back to visit and propose as well as meet her family and see where she worked and that time I kept everything. Filed the K1 after that second trip. Don't know how long you have been together or how well you documented your relationship so far, but it may not be a bad idea to take the time and a few months to document everything and save up for a plane ticket for another visit.

Congratulations!!...How about a description of the details of the interview?....i think most people (myself included) are always looking for the details of what to expect at the AOS interview. Congrats to the OP as well. We're going in for the AOS interview next week. Hopefully we also pass. Planning on posting our experience here on the boards after the interview.

Nice. Glad to see things are going well.

Familiar? I guess I haven't read too many posts about this sort of situation, but the situation is probably far too common. One former friend who I had lost touch with I contacted a few years back. It had nothing to do with the current situation, supplemental support, or what is happening now. What is relevant though is I reached out to the guy and just wanted to have a drink/lunch and catch up a bit. That former friend was on top of the world. Was in with Google in a great job, recently married, wife made great money and he lived the good life. He basically told me he never asked people for help because he didn't want to be disappointed and he also felt he did everything on his own and didn't want to owe anything to anybody. I'm sure he was excluding his wife and own family in that comment, but I got the idea. His meaning was pretty much, "Don't ask me for anything because I never plan to ask you for anything." Never talked to that guy again, even though we were good friends all through high school and college. That saying about a friend in need is a friend indeed applies perfectly and I'll never forget that experience. Now it is the same sort of feeling. Nobody likes to ask for help, but when they do it is usually for a very important matter. I've never asked for help from my family. Like most folks I like to be independent and self sufficient. I also don't want to be a bother or a burden or anybody or have to put someone on the spot. Still, this was the first time I did ask for help and I guess it will be the last as well, since all things considered this request was important to me, but I can think of several other situations that would be far more critical. The crazy thing is my best friend did step up and is planning on helping. It is a sad state when your friend helps out when your blood turned away.

I never thought it would be such a task to get someone to co-sponsor my wife. Not here to air out dirty laundry, so no details, but suffice it to say I may not have the option of a completed supplemental support form in the background as insurance. My entire plan was to go to our interview next week and do everything possible to qualify on our own. That is still the plan, but I thought having a completed form I could turn in, just in case, was a good idea. Talk about disappointing. I was already angry because many family and friends really didn't extend a warm welcome to my wife and it's already been several months since our marriage. My wife is a sweetheart too. She speaks English, is shy, but friendly, and we're happy together, but I always felt an air of disdain, superiority, or some other complete crap from some people in my life. Thought it was just in my mind and I was paranoid, but I guess the ol' gut was right. Oh well. You never know who your real friends and I guess supportive family members are until you are in a bind and feel the need to ask for help, only to get shunned or receive some utter BS excuses. Hell, at least my conscience is clear if things reverse and the same folks need my help and I say no. What's fair is fair. At least this is all clear now. In some ways this is better, since if I didn't get laid off I would have never had to ask for help, never learned a few things about some people, and I'd still be clueless right now. Tried to shield my wife from some of this BS, but she's smart and knows what is going on, so she's hurt. I actually thought I'd have several people offering to help and I'd have to pick one. Really didn't think it would be a 180 degree situation and I am still sort of in shock.

I'm pretty worried about this. I am her primary sponsor and I did submit the I-864 along with documentation of my last 3 years taxes and other financial status. If my retirement accounts are counted I'm well over the poverty limit by 3x. Haven't been sleeping well. Looking for a new job and having this interview hanging over our heads is stressful. After about 8 months and 5 trips to the Social Security office we were finally told my wife should get a number and card in the mail in two weeks. There were still issues and the person there did a 'manual over ride,' and requested the number for us. I didn't even know this was possible. I'm trying to line up someone for a supplemental support document. For various reasons this is hard to do, but I believe it may be necessary. I can't imagine going through all this, all the time, effort, waiting, being separated, expenses, and being married, only to be told we can't adjust because you are currently unemployed and we doubt you can support her. What happens then? They start deportation proceedings against my wife? I have to appeal the decision and spend money on an immigration attorney? It hurts my head just thinking about this. I'm currently asking family to provide a supplemental support form, but it really feels invasive. The idea of asking them for pay stubs, W2 forms, and 3 years tax returns, while also having them feel financially obligated to my wife if I happen to drop dead is really very difficult on many levels. I hate putting people into a corner like that. Why couldn't I have been approved and in at least the 2 year conditional period before losing my job? Heck, why did I have to lose my job in the first place? Any more opinions? Anyone else go in with a stellar work history, but unemployed at the time?

We were told that my wife had to get the HPV vaccine when we went in for the other shots. I do remember them asking if she was pregnant and believe if she were that she could not receive the vaccine. As the others have said, you need to contact the civil surgeon and should be able to get a waiver or advice on how to respond.

I don't have direct experience with this, but I believe it would be a great asset for everyone to help and follow your own situation and eventual resolution for anyone else with this issue in the future.

Yep

I've read that there are 2 main reasons for an AOS interview. Correct me if I'm wrong. 1) They doubt the relationship is real. 2) They doubt you can support your wife. Unfortunately I have been caught up in the current economic mess and lost a job of almost 8 years working for the state. We're pretty well covered on the relationship front. Plenty of documentation of our travels, common bank and checking accounts, credit cards, photos, and we've pretty much been together 24/7 since she arrived and we were married. What concern's me is my lack of employment and I am sure that will be their focus. I have submitted tax returns for 2006-2008 and have been pulling unemployment while looking for work. I have fairly substantial retirement savings and cash on hand to support us for awhile barring major emergencies or problems. I'm just not sure how to approach the AOS interview. I did ask family for a supplemental support form, but many were hesitant and didn't want to supply 3 years tax forms, income statements, and other information. Push comes to shove there are still other family and friends I could ask to help, but it is pretty embarrassing and depressing to have to ask for this sort of thing, especially considering we've done everything on our own. Just wondering what everyone thinks. If you folks feel I could get denied because of my employment status, perhaps I should swallow my pride and try again for a secondary sponsor before the interview. The crappy thing is some friends are in the same boat as I am - looking for work, so they can't help.

We applied back in Dec of last year - 2 weeks after my then fiancee arrived. They said wait for at least a month. We came back after 5 weeks or so, applied and ran into the name does not match problem and were told to wait for another month. We came back after that and talked to supervisors who said they would look into it. We got married in Feb 2009. Went back and they said she was within 1 month of the K1 expiring, so no card could be issued. Lived our lives as a married couple, went on some trips and then applied for AOS. We got AP and the EAD card, went back to SS office and they said there is no record of her ever applying, but we have 3 letters from them showing when we applied. It's now been another month and still no SS card. We have to go in for a AOS interview next month, but still no SS card. It is amazing.

That's cool. We're in the Bay Area as well near Oakland/SF. You guys should get the biometrics appointment in a few weeks and go in for the fingerprints/photo/signature.

We received my wife's EAD card in the mail just now. I have to say that card is pretty fancy and far more fancy than my California driver's license. It has a mag stripe, 2 different bar codes, finger print, photo, information section, is plastic, has several security features and is pretty detailed. There's also disclaimers all over saying how it is only to prove she can work here legally, isn't to be used as a re-entry device, can be taken back by USCIS, etc. At least we can finally get her a SS number. We tried one month after she came into the US and went back 3x, but the SS office kept giving us grief and finally said it was too late to issue a card and we would have to wait for her immigration. I'm really surprised and pleased at our biometrics and the speed of both AP and EAD documentation. Will cross my fingers and hope the 2 year conditional green card is approved also and she should be fully documented soon. Been carrying her Chinese ID and passport around for months because we really had no US documentation at all. Hated doing that because I'm paranoid I'd lose those docs, get robbed, etc. Still, having her passport and our marriage certificate with us has saved us some hassles in various situations and this EAD card will hopefully serve as ID as well in many cases until she get's her own driver's license.

AP is well recognized when re-entering the US... also well recognized in Canada and to some extent in HK... however, it is NOT well recognized in many areas of mainland China. We tried and it was quite scary... almost didn't get her out in time for flight. We also know several others with the same experience in different parts of China. As you noted, just try reading the form... very confusing... even when explaining it to someone else with English as their first language - very difficult - can't be explained very well and it doesn't make much sense. So you can imagine how difficult to explain to Chinese immigration when trying to leave China... they look for Visa or Green Card and don't understand much else. Green Card is not a problem... well recognized whether it's 2 year or 10 year. Yep, I was afraid of this. AP is nice and probably is fine for travel to Canada and Mexico. It should be fine in China as well, but I remember how scrutinized she was with the US K1 visa when we tried to enter Hong Kong through Shenzhen. It should probably work, but the chances of delays and having someone there who wants to give you are hard time is probably best avoided if at all possible. We're no planning on going to China soon and hopefully the green card is approved and arrives soon.

We received the AP approval yesterday. Received what looks to be two identical copies for some reason. Guess I can carry one around and keep one in her file at home with the rest of our documents. There is a large section of warnings though and remembering how hard it was to get out of China it would seem travel back there would be a bad idea. I would hope border guards in the US and customs would recognize the document and let her back into the US to continue AOS, but I doubt Chinese guards would let her out of China on an expired US visa and this document, since I doubt they even read English. Anybody have experience traveling back to China on AP? How does it work with someone with a 2 year green card?

We sent in our AOS packet around end of May, 2009. We got scheduled for fingerprints June, 2009 - Last week actually. My post is probably still on this board. I thought it was pretty fast to get an ASC appointment in a month and we would be waiting for 2-3 months. If we got the cancellation letter I would also still go. Perhaps their automated systems screwed up and they send out more ASC notices than they wanted and now are swamped with cases and they want to scale back. Still, the large bold print about how if you don't show up your entire application would be considered abandoned really pissed me off. Who in their right mind would go through all of this, pay the expenses for trips, fees, plan and have a wedding, start a new life, and then miss the bio appointment? You should definitely go and get there as they open if possible. Our ASC took less than 20 minutes. We were actually waiting outside the door for them to open in the morning for longer than the process took inside. I was really impressed because from filing AOS through the appointment this was the fastest and smoothest parts of the entire journey so far. Sorry to hear other folks are getting the added confusion and frustration.

We decided to save the cash for a hotel room and just leave 2+ hours early for what should be a 1 hour drive with no traffic. We arrived before 7am and had to find a place to get a donut, coffee and to wait for 8am. I started 'the line,' but there was only one lady behind me who was going for citizenship. I guess you have to get biometrics again if you file for citizenship. I find it ironic how it is easier to just steal someone's ID than it is to go through all the motions for visa, conditional green card, 10 year green card, and citizenship. I should know because my ID was stolen 2 years. The staff were on time, efficient, polite and we were done within 20 minutes from start to finish. They fingerprint scan with probably more efficiency than felony prisoners or at least just as methodical. The only 30 second hangup was the first person said my wife's name didn't match the documentation. It was because she took my last name, so it was good we had our marriage certificate with us. I actually brought all our paperwork, just in case. Now I guess we just wait to see if there are any hang ups, if we get called for an interview, RFE or some other issue. Still, the experience so far with pre-visa vs., after entry into the US and AOS has been night and day with the experience in the US far better.

Hey folks. Well, we have our biometrics appointment for tomorrow. I love how they say they will consider our application abandoned. I guess the $1200+ in fees, 1.5 year+ long wait, getting married, and all the time/money/effort in GUZ and China is something we just did for fun and the heck of it? I'm actually considering driving there tonight, even though it is a one hour long drive from where we live. I am paranoid enough that I don't want traffic, accidents, car troubles, or some other random act from God having us miss the appointment. We are scheduled for 8am, so there is little leeway in the morning. Anything I need to bring besides the passport, national ID, and appointment letter? Anything to watch out for? I also updated my timeline before this post, just so folks don't have to remind me. Thanks!