Wife's Friend Wants to Meet America Man

[keelec]

Otherwise this sounds about as wrong as hearing one of my friends suggest that I get my wife to hook them up with one of her Chinese friends because they prefer thier women to be docile and obedient.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with introducing friends. Heck, many people meet their second half through the introductions of friends.

 

Yes, a large number of the foreign women that marry American men are wanting to come to the USA.

 

Yet, they do so for many reasons. Some women are seeking a "Docile and Obedient" husband!!!

 

That aside, I have talked to many Russian women about the subject, and have come to the conclusion that Russian women and American men can make a tremendously good match. We'll see how that holds up over the next few years.

I have been told that many Russian men frequently overindulge in Vodka, as well as being generally "Lazy". Although the Russian women want go come to the USA because of an illusion of wealth, they are also looking for a magical loving relationship that they believe can be found in an international relationship.

 

The bottom line is that anybody (both men and women) who is willing to endure over a year of waiting for a visa believes that they have found something better through international dating than they would otherwise find in their own respective countries.

 

I have read some horror stories of women who marry an American Citizen for the sole purpose of taking advantage of his generosity. Yet, I have also seen personals ads posted by men that make me gag and want to heave.

 

----- Clifford -----

[bobmal99]

Exactly what do you mean by """"mindful of her place in public""""""

[AZwolfman]

. . .they prefer thier women to be docile and obedient.

Wow, Is your wife actually docile and obedient! Mine aint!

 

LMAO

 

Patrick

Yeah, where did you get one of those??

[Mick]

Exactly what do you mean by """"mindful of her place in public""""""

I thought that would get someone's attention. Xiahong is 'traditional' Chinese, meaning she would never make me lose face in public no matter how stupid a thing I do or how badly she would want to correct me. That changes when we get home and close the door. She isn't the least bit inhibited about laying down the law and she is every bit as stubborn and pig-headed as I am. That's part of why I love her.

Never knew you were stubborn and pig-headed Don.

[bobmal99]

Do you think we are going to buy that????

[AngryTexan]

After seeing how well Xiaolu takes care of me, and how much happier I am these days, several of my friends have inquired about the possibility of meeting her available friends in China. "Docile" and "obedient" are not words I would use to describe her. Rather, "kind", "generous", "caring", and "loving" are the ones that immediately come to mind.

[Mick]

After seeing how well Xiaolu takes care of me, and how much happier I am these days, several of my friends have inquired about the possibility of meeting her available friends in China.  "Docile" and "obedient" are not words I would use to describe her.  Rather, "kind", "generous", "caring", and "loving" are the ones that immediately come to mind.    

Having met Xiaolu Tex, I couldn't agree more. She is one great lady.

[AngryTexan]

As is Li, Mick. You are a very lucky man indeed!!

[Patrick & Li]

Well.....Lets put it this way. My wife is a strong, independant lady. She works hard, and she is very regimented in her behaviour. She is also very feminine, acts like a lady at all times. She understands and appreciates the fact that we are partners and share in lifes adventures together. I am also pretty sure that she has certain expectations of me that i have yet to grasp, and vice/versa! We often tell each other that we will teach the other about Chinese/American cultures. I am sure she will only teach me the good parts, as will I!

I wouldn't have it any other way.

 

Patrick & Li

[dmdnb9s]

I met my fiancee on AsiaFriendFinder. She was only one of two women, out of many, who had genuine feelings, caring and concern about the passing away of my first wife. Her profile had many things in common with mine and after several months of emails, YIM & phone calls, I went to see her. She was even better in person, so I asked her to marry me. That was one year ago and we are still doing the visa waiting game. [must be love to still be waiting ;-)]

 

I chose international dating because I too did not want the manipulation, uncaring & liberal thinking that is so common with many American women today. I chose traditional Chinese women because they have many of the traditional family values that I grew up with. Most of my family & friends think it is because I wanted a docile servant. I try to explain but they just don't get it. But now that they are learning who Lisa is, they are asking me if there are any more woman like Lisa back in China.

 

I did learn about Lisa's temper and "The Look" on my last visit, so I would not say Chinese woman are subservient. But I do agree that they do not allow their man to lose face in public. It is more of "just wait until we get home mister".

[Orrin]

Robert...............

 

Do you still wonder now why it is so difficult getting U.S. visas for Chinese women under the age of thirty??

[SBS]

At my wife's request, I am posting this because my wife, Ping, wants her friend to come to America.

 

If she wants to help her friend to come to America, she should contact the USA consulate/embassy and see about getting an immigration visa.

 

Otherwise this sounds about as wrong as hearing one of my friends suggest that I get my wife to hook them up with one of her Chinese friends because they prefer thier women to be docile and obedient.

I agree with you .

 

also it sounds like her friend just wanted to come to America for herself.

[frank1538]

I think maybe you're reading too much into Patrick's request.

 

I remember when I was leaving Zhanjiang to come back to America, Jingwen's niece came up to me and very discreetly gave me some of her pictures. She asked me to see if any of my friends might be interested in writing to her. I took the pictures.

 

I would like to think that her seeing how I treat Jingwen may have had some bearing on her wanting to meet an American. It never entered my mind that she was looking for an get out of jail card.

 

If Li's friend wants to meet more Americans, maybe it's because she sees how Patrick treats Li and how happy Li is.

[keelec]

Robert...............

 

Do you still wonder now why it is so difficult getting U.S. visas for Chinese women under the age of thirty?? 

So, it is bad for a foreign woman to want to marry someone outside of her country?

 

What about an American (man or woman) who decides to marry a foreigner and decides to bring her home to the USA? I guess he should be treated as a third class citizen too!!!

I guess we wouldn't want for these foreign women to compete for our jobs here in the USA.

Of course, it is perfectly fine for us to send all of our shoes, clothing, and handtool manufacturing to their country.... just as long as they don't send any "workers" here.

 

----- Clifford ------

[MarkLuvsShuPing]

I think Orrin is just addressing the concern that we all have at first, does she want me or the land of the free? Personally I wouldn't begrudge anyone the opportunity to come to America and partake in/contribute to the prosperity that we enjoy.

 

I don't doubt that a good majority of immigrant wives and fiancees were inticed to leave their homeland for the myth that is America. I mean I don't think they're lining up in droves to immigrate to, oh let's say, France and Germany. Does that mean they're wrong or criminal? I don't think so.

 

Haven't you ever thought, "If I had about $30,000 I could go retire somewhere in southeast asia and live like a king."? Is that any different? Leaving your homeland for the perception of a better life in another country.

 

Unfortunately that is sometimes the only reason a perspective immigrant marries an American. It's OK as long as true feelings grow from there, but if it remains the only reason, that's when it's wrong. That's when we have a broken heart and a lot of unhappiness all around.

 

Now, as to Orrin's use of a certain demographic, Chinese women under 30, I don't have the numbers to support my suspicion, but I would guess that's where a lot of broken hearts, i.e. insincere marriages, come from. The bad news for us is that they delay the process for those who are truely in love.

 

But that's the point, isn't it? How do you tell the difference? The length and inconvenience of the process seems to be the current solution.

 

I (of course) think it's fine to meet on the internet, fall in love and bring your loved one to this country. My guess is their work ethic and dedication to a life here in America is much better than many of the spoiled natives we already have here. So how can that be a bad thing?