Engagement Ring

[michaelt]

I got engaged to my wonderful SO on my first and only visit to China back in January. I told her I would get her an engagement ring when she arrives in the US because I was not comfortable buying one in China and would like it sized well for her. But now, since I am learning so much about the interview, I can see where her wearing a ring could help this process. Should I send her a ring? I don't really want to do this by mail (I think that would be too impersonal) but does anyone think it makes a significantly better impression to the Visa Officer if she is wearing an engagement ring? (I would think so) Or perhaps it is common for the beneficiary to NOT be wearing a ring? Thank you all!

[Cerberus]

I got engaged to my wonderful SO on my first and only visit to China back in January. I told her I would get her an engagement ring when she arrives in the US because I was not comfortable buying one in China and would like it sized well for her. But now, since I am learning so much about the interview, I can see where her wearing a ring could help this process. Should I send her a ring? I don't really want to do this by mail (I think that would be too impersonal) but does anyone think it makes a significantly better impression to the Visa Officer if she is wearing an engagement ring? (I would think so) Or perhaps it is common for the beneficiary to NOT be wearing a ring? Thank you all!

Michael,

 

I won¡¯t try to sound like a smart aleck in response. The question that you are proposing has been posted on numerous times. The opinions are very diverse. The consensus of opinion I believe was not wear the ring during the interview (the ring raises a too many questions, etc, etc0. The second part of your question was when to give, where to buy etc, etc. I believe these questions, have been discussed so many times and there are so many opinions, I wouldn't hazard a guess to where the correct answer was.

 

IMHO, the best thing to do is to use the search function for CFL and form your own opinion.

 

In my case, the engagement and wedding ring were one and the same (welded by jeweler at my direction). However I was a K3 Visa petitioner (marriage based). I know that my wife doesn't really care much all that much about rings and wears a small platinum band I purchased also for her for her marriage. The diamond ring I brought to her (family heirloom with 1 karat) diamond stays locked in a safety deposit box). This is only her opinion. Your fianc¨¦e¡¯s may different. The decision is based on what your fianc¨¦e decide.

 

Good luck

Edited May 12, 2007 by Cerberus (see edit history)

[robert]

I got engaged to my wonderful SO on my first and only visit to China back in January. I told her I would get her an engagement ring when she arrives in the US because I was not comfortable buying one in China and would like it sized well for her. But now, since I am learning so much about the interview, I can see where her wearing a ring could help this process. Should I send her a ring? I don't really want to do this by mail (I think that would be too impersonal) but does anyone think it makes a significantly better impression to the Visa Officer if she is wearing an engagement ring? (I would think so) Or perhaps it is common for the beneficiary to NOT be wearing a ring? Thank you all!

Michael: Why not buy the ring and make a 2nd trip to China. This can multiple benefit you. You can give her the ring personally. You get a second opportunity to visit her and maybe most important it shows the interview officer that you have been to China twice thereby reducing the risk of the question arising of a real relationship! Good Luck!

[Randy W]

You can buy a ring now, estimating the size (or take sizing rings with you on your next trip). Most jewelers will allow you to re-size it after she arrives in the states.

 

What I did was to keep the ring here, and sent her a picture of the ring and a copy of the receipt for relationship evidence.

[jim_julian]

I can't recall seeing a Chinese lady married to a Chinese man in China who had a traditional engagement ring. It's just not the custom that it is in the US.

 

Likewise, many many Chinese do not wear a wedding ring.

 

I believe that's it's waaaay too risky to buy a diamond in China when you can buy at competitive prices with recognized grading certificates in the US.

 

I have a hard time thinking that the presence or absence of an engagement ring is going to have a significant impact on the VO. Money might be better spent for a second trip (although many pass with just a single visit)

 

Bottom line: Either buy a ring in the US and make a trip or wait until she is here.

[lostinblue]

Yan told me we have better places to use the money than for a diamond ring. Few women in China wear one.

[david_dawei]

I always advocate buying the ring together in china.. being a part of her selecting that ring is priceless... and it's a lot easier for her to do it in her 'backyard' atmosphere.. but maybe that's just me.

[rosyanne]

Just ask her what she prefer to do.

[Rickmt57]

I am CR-1 and I bought my wife a ring while we were together in China, it is a modest ring but it made here the happiest woman in the world. She also insisted on buying me a ring and on the inside we hade it engraved with our names and the date we were married. I didnt do this to make a difference at the inteview, infact the thought never crossed my mind I did it because I love my wife dearly.

[michaelt]

I am CR-1 and I bought my wife a ring while we were together in China, it is a modest ring but it made here the happiest woman in the world. She also insisted on buying me a ring and on the inside we hade it engraved with our names and the date we were married. I didnt do this to make a difference at the inteview, infact the thought never crossed my mind I did it because I love my wife dearly.

Thank you. I apologize. I didn't mean to "cheapen" the ring thing. I promised a ring to my SO but do not see me returning for awhile due to a new job and no vacation. I just did not know if VO's don't see a ring, does that cause them concern and launch the "evidence of relationship" thing? Again, forgive me for mis-communicating my genuine intentions.

[michaelt]

I got engaged to my wonderful SO on my first and only visit to China back in January. I told her I would get her an engagement ring when she arrives in the US because I was not comfortable buying one in China and would like it sized well for her. But now, since I am learning so much about the interview, I can see where her wearing a ring could help this process. Should I send her a ring? I don't really want to do this by mail (I think that would be too impersonal) but does anyone think it makes a significantly better impression to the Visa Officer if she is wearing an engagement ring? (I would think so) Or perhaps it is common for the beneficiary to NOT be wearing a ring? Thank you all!

Michael: Why not buy the ring and make a 2nd trip to China. This can multiple benefit you. You can give her the ring personally. You get a second opportunity to visit her and maybe most important it shows the interview officer that you have been to China twice thereby reducing the risk of the question arising of a real relationship! Good Luck!

I'm actually thinking in that direction now, but new job probably not too generous with time off for many, many months, but don't anticipate interview till atleast Dec or Jan.

[GaryandSherry]

I got engaged to my wonderful SO on my first and only visit to China back in January. I told her I would get her an engagement ring when she arrives in the US because I was not comfortable buying one in China and would like it sized well for her. But now, since I am learning so much about the interview, I can see where her wearing a ring could help this process. Should I send her a ring? I don't really want to do this by mail (I think that would be too impersonal) but does anyone think it makes a significantly better impression to the Visa Officer if she is wearing an engagement ring? (I would think so) Or perhaps it is common for the beneficiary to NOT be wearing a ring? Thank you all!

 

Michael... The last thing you should be worrying about is an engagement ring. You need to worry about all that damned paper work and insure you dot your 'i's" and cross your "t's". An engagement ring won't do you much good if you can't get past the interview. As a side note. I had my wife buy a cheap ring in China for show. It was most certainly changed when she arrived in the US and we were married.

[ed and ying]

I always advocate buying the ring together in china.. being a part of her selecting that ring is priceless... and it's a lot easier for her to do it in her 'backyard' atmosphere.. but maybe that's just me.

Me too ! Ying wanted to pick her ring. That is great, cause I sure did not want to try an pick it. I said not a word about fakes, buying in USA might be safer or a better value. The only thing of importance was that she got the ring she wanted and she was happy.

Edited May 13, 2007 by ed and ying (see edit history)

[jkobman]

Sarah and I are now married. When I asked her to marry me, we went to a local jewelry store in Nanjing and bout 22K rings - pretty much a matching set. They sized them in the store. IF you are able to return, get some rings.

Sarah maintains that many "siamonds" and precious stone rings are faked and do not buy the rings in China. AT the time we purchased the rings (3 yrs ago) the gold was regulated and the price set daily by the Chinese Govt.

 

Hope things work out.

 

Happy Jeff in Virginia

[tonado]

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=24700

 

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