Chinese Culture ????

[Stephen]

I've read a lot of threads here discussing Chinese culture. And as I spend my last day of my fourth trip to China, I have to ponder. Are the children who run around in the hotel restaurant grabbing food off of other peoples table, part of the culture? Are the people who get stranded in the middle of the road with no escape possible, part of the culture? Are the people who spit and blow their nose on the street, part of culture? Is all the shoving and cutting in line, part of the culture? Are the ten people who are staying in our 2 bedroom condo, while my wife and I have to pay for a hotel, part of the culture? Are the children who are jumping up and down on our new sofa with dirty shoes while their parents laugh, part of the culture? Are the 4 other people who come to visit and I have to pay for a hotel for them cause there¡¯s no room in our 2 bedroom condo, part of the culture? Or are these things a complete breakdown of discipline within a society¡­ Well I certainly don't know. I found the best way, for me, to understanding Chinese culture is just to smile and say ¡°Whatever Dear¡±. I've learned not to make any judgments on the spot and even when I think about it later¡­ I just smile and shake my head¡­ because I guess it's just Chinese culture.

[phantom1949]

I've read a lot of threads here discussing Chinese culture. And as I spend my last day of my fourth trip to China, I have to ponder. Are the children who run around in the hotel restaurant grabbing food off of other peoples table, part of the culture? Are the people who get stranded in the middle of the road with no escape possible, part of the culture? Are the people who spit and blow their nose on the street, part of culture? Is all the shoving and cutting in line, part of the culture? Are the ten people who are staying in our 2 bedroom condo, while my wife and I have to pay for a hotel, part of the culture? Are the children who are jumping up and down on our new sofa with dirty shoes while their parents laugh, part of the culture? Are the 4 other people who come to visit and I have to pay for a hotel for them cause there¡¯s no room in our 2 bedroom condo, part of the culture? Or are these things a complete breakdown of discipline within a society¡­ Well I certainly don't know. I found the best way, for me, to understanding Chinese culture is just to smile and say ¡°Whatever Dear¡±. I've learned not to make any judgments on the spot and even when I think about it later¡­ I just smile and shake my head¡­ because I guess it's just Chinese culture.

 

I guess I have always been wrong. I thought the two words to a successful marriage are "Yes Dear" not "Whatever Dear".

 

I will have to ponder this change...

 

I know you sound frustrated but family is family so get use to it.

[Stephen]

Oh I'm use to it... that's why I'm still smiling

 

I've read a lot of threads here discussing Chinese culture. And as I spend my last day of my fourth trip to China, I have to ponder. Are the children who run around in the hotel restaurant grabbing food off of other peoples table, part of the culture? Are the people who get stranded in the middle of the road with no escape possible, part of the culture? Are the people who spit and blow their nose on the street, part of culture? Is all the shoving and cutting in line, part of the culture? Are the ten people who are staying in our 2 bedroom condo, while my wife and I have to pay for a hotel, part of the culture? Are the children who are jumping up and down on our new sofa with dirty shoes while their parents laugh, part of the culture? Are the 4 other people who come to visit and I have to pay for a hotel for them cause there¡¯s no room in our 2 bedroom condo, part of the culture? Or are these things a complete breakdown of discipline within a society¡­ Well I certainly don't know. I found the best way, for me, to understanding Chinese culture is just to smile and say ¡°Whatever Dear¡±. I've learned not to make any judgments on the spot and even when I think about it later¡­ I just smile and shake my head¡­ because I guess it's just Chinese culture.

 

I guess I have always been wrong. I thought the two words to a successful marriage are "Yes Dear" not "Whatever Dear".

 

I will have to ponder this change...

 

I know you sound frustrated but family is family so get use to it.

[tonado]

Yes, that is part of the culture. Take the good as well as the bad.

[Randy W]

Yes, that is part of the culture. Take the good as well as the bad.

 

 

I would have said "No, but it is part of the culture to put up with it", although I have seen people get yelled at for misbehavior - this is VERY rare

 

It's amazing how one person with a cell phone can overpower any other sound in his vicinity.

 

I've read a lot of threads here discussing Chinese culture. And as I spend my last day of my fourth trip to China, I have to ponder. Are the children who run around in the hotel restaurant grabbing food off of other peoples table, part of the culture? NO

Are the people who get stranded in the middle of the road with no escape possible, part of the culture? They always make it to the other side

Are the people who spit and blow their nose on the street, part of culture? NO, just obnoxious

Is all the shoving and cutting in line, part of the culture? Very common

Are the ten people who are staying in our 2 bedroom condo, while my wife and I have to pay for a hotel, part of the culture? NO , but it is part of the culture to accomodate your family

Are the children who are jumping up and down on our new sofa with dirty shoes while their parents laugh, part of the culture? NO people generally take their shoes off in a house

Are the 4 other people who come to visit and I have to pay for a hotel for them cause there¡¯s no room in our 2 bedroom condo, part of the culture? NO, but it is part of the culture to accomodate your family

Or are these things a complete breakdown of discipline within a society¡­ Well I certainly don't know. I found the best way, for me, to understanding Chinese culture is just to smile and say ¡°Whatever Dear¡±. I've learned not to make any judgments on the spot and even when I think about it later¡­ I just smile and shake my head¡­ because I guess it's just Chinese culture.

[SheLikesME?]

I'm not implying anything, but my wife would be frustrated about those same things too. She would also tell me so, privatly, later. She has been in Europe and worked with Americans and I think avoided getting me into situations, knowing somewhat how I live. I know she is completly embarresed to take me to her parents home who I think have an out house

 

Now the shoes on the couch, WHEW, she would have stepped in and done something about that. In fact her sister was a bit too strict with me and even washed my slippers I carried in my bag before i could walk in her house. she didn't care how rude she was to me about the cleanliness. Later she kinda warmed up to me.

[jim_julian]

Wow Stephen! Right on. I've experienced most of that and generally it's too difficult to fight. (Ahh my campaign for no smoking in the apartment, just on the balconies).

 

I'm some times amazed how some people here just gloss over all the crap you summarize and much more.

 

Sure all countries/cultures/individuals have pluses and minuses but it was sweet music in my ear when my wife told me she doesn't want to live in China, she wants to live in the US.

[skibum]

Who are the people in the condo and how did they get there?

[LeeFisher3]

Most of what you have described is behavior and has little to do with culture. Bad behavior is the same world wide, it frustrates many.

 

I've see the same if not worse in the US by American families. The family related things are just that family things, some families don't tolerate this behavior and others think it's cute. Freeloaders are freeloaders no matter what country, it could be that they think they have a rich relative.

 

Standing in the middle of the road trying to get to the other side, guess you've never been to New York or Chicago where the taxi drivers use those people as targets.

 

As for the shoving and cutting in line, when was the last time you were at a professional sporting event, the early Christmas shopping the day after Thanksgiving or the morning they began selling the most resent Play Stations? But the US has something even better when driving in a big city during rush hour, we add a bit more of a challenge to it as you get to guess if the driver you just cut off has a gun and wants to use it on you.

 

Spitting occurs in the US just as it does in China, but in China many people take their shoes off when entering a home, unlike the US where we are happy to bring remnants of the local dog or cat to grind into the carpet for others to walk barefoot through. And yes the kids are more than happy to jump on the new furniture with their shoes on in the good Ole USA.

[sawadee]

Well, spoiled and poor-mannered kids, honking and rude driver, spitting, shoving and cutting line people, selfish guests is not part of our Chinese culture, it is a sign of how we are losing our cultural heritage, and that is sad thing.

 

And the saddest part is that the parents just think how cute and outgoing their kids are, taking the public places as their own; most people who spitting, shoving, cutting lines, shouting, dont feel the shame.

Edited January 3, 2007 by sawadee (see edit history)

[SheLikesME?]

Well, spoiled and poor-mannered kids, honking and rude driver, spitting, shoving and cutting line people, selfish guests is not part of our Chinese culture, it is a sign of how we are losing our cultural heritage, and that is sad thing.

 

And the saddest part is that the parents just think how cute and outgoing their kids are, taking the public places as their own; most people who spitting, shoving, cutting lines, shouting, dont feel the shame.

Ahhh, you keep your hoola hoop avatar. Your to be comended. Now if Randy W would just get his back on.

[Randy W]

 

Ahhh, you keep your hoola hoop avatar. Your to be comended. Now if Randy W would just get his back on.

 

Jan 31 will be the last day of dead movie star month.

[SmilingAsia]

Yes, that is part of the culture. Take the good as well as the bad.

No, this is not part of culture, but part of his WIFE.

If my SO flies half the world to me, I'd prefer more time and space for ourselves instead of showing off by inviting dozens of friends and relatives to our home.

 

I've observed British guys are not so tolerant. I'll tell you the story:

A British guy flew to Guangzhou to be with his wife. The wife invited dozens of friends to show off and also for the purpose of marketing. The wife got commission from the dating service company by introducing women to them. Phone calls the whole day, dinner parties everyday. Now the guy insisted on a divorce.