'Why I Date Asian Women'

[Dennis143]

I stumbled across this site tonight:

 

http://www.asianwhite.org/afwm/why.html

 

You Know Your an Egg When: White on the outside, yellow on the inside.

The "Egg", a.k.a. the Asiaphile suffers from a racial identity problem. They are frequently seen wandering around Chinatown, or eating a bowl of Pho, and will be first in line at the Jackie Chan opening. How do you know you are an Egg? See if the statements below describe you.

 

You were indignant when the waiter handed you a fork in an Asian restaurant.

 

Your cell phone has Chinese characters on it

 

You drink loose leaf Jasmine tea.

 

In most the pictures you have of yourself you are the only white boy, and you didn't notice it at the time

 

You slurp your noodles

 

Chicken feet and pig blood cakes = good eatin'

 

Red bean ice cream is a real treat

 

PEARL MILK TEA!!!!

 

You are disappointed when they dubbed Crouching Tiger hidden dragon instead of leaving it in Chinese.

 

You can tell when the dialogue jumps back and forth between Mandarin and Cantonese.

 

You can tell which actors are from Taiwan by their accents.

 

You have those little Chinese health balls on your desk

 

You give a slight bow when you meet people.

 

You are charged with drunk driving because you said the entire be pe me fe alphabet by mistake.

 

You pass out lucky money in red envelopes on New Years

 

You don't think January 1st is New Years

 

You think white people smell funny.

 

You say "Lucy Liu and those other Angels"

 

You would rather just walk.

 

You have met Zhanghuimei, but you can't quite put a face to Gloria Estephan

 

All this open space gives you the heebie jeebies

 

You know the ins and outs of public transportation, and you can't drive

 

Most of your girl/boyfriends have been Asian.

 

You can't quite connect with 'regular' white people

 

You know Taiwan politics better than the American politics.

 

You get antsy when there aren't enough Asians around.

 

You have to explain to your work colleauges that you actually LIKE to drink cold coffee.

 

You visit a pier in Monterey and look down and get hungry from seeing the floating seaweed.

 

When your girlfriend is talking to you, you respond with "HMMMM" or "UHH-HHUUUUH" and believe that those are intelligible answers.

 

You regard pointing feet at others as unspeakably rude.

 

You just don't get "Americans"

 

You read this page and didn't realize it was a joke.

[A Mafan]

1, 3, 4, 6, 7, and 9-11 are absolutely true. Okay, I haven't actually met Zhang Huimei...

But Chinese people have said I know more Chinese pop stars than they do.

[shrug]

 

I guess I'm an egg.

[Tom]

Ha! I never realized! There were 22 items I actually agreed with.

 

I got a kick out of the one 'When your girlfriend is talking to you, you respond with "HMMMM" or "UHH-HHUUUUH" and believe that those are intelligible answers'. At first, whenever my wife replied with the kind of 'uuuhhh' sound, I always had to think 'did that mean yes?', but now I find myself doing it - but not just with her - it's with everyone else too.

 

And I DO have those little Chinese health balls at my desk.

 

Except, I don't like chicken feet - I tend to stay out of the house when they are being cooked - terrible smell.

 

It seems sometimes when my wife does things for her friends, she gets the chicken feet as a kind of gift of gratitude. All I can think of is "gee - thanks "

[Feathers268]

So that's why Jen keeps calling me egg. And I thought it was because she wants me to lose a little weight.

[tonado]

Not an egg. A smilie

[georgeandli]

Don't consider myself an egg. Just lucky to have found LiWen.

[trickyspark]

Don't consider myself an egg. Just lucky to have found LiWen.

226555[/snapback]

Ah god the chicken feet, or in my wife's case she'll grab pig's feet if there arent any chicken feet in the grocery store. Dear lord, she found a family pack, musta been about 6lbs of pig feet...I still can't bring myself to eat those, although I realize they probably put worse things in hotdogs.

 

 

Anyone that has been to China and eaten a meal with the wife's family ever get special meat? I did, my wife says "HERE HONEY TRY THIS", so I do...it was like 95% gristle or cartilige...which to me, and most people I know gristle initiates a slight gag reflex or a polite spit into the napkin at least.

 

 

 

I am really greatful they shared their food and they really were the nicest most generous people I can honestly recall meeting, and I appreciate them cooking those big meals for me, but man that gristle was hard to eat. Every piece I ate, seemed to indicate I liked it, so they'd drop more on my plate.

 

My wife loves it, she loves fat too, Where as I usually cut it off my steak, it's the first thing she eats...and will sometimes snag mine. How she stays 90-95lbs I have no idea. I did notice at meals, her and her family drank very little compared to what they ate. Where as I would drink what they said was "unnatural" amounts. Usually about a quart or half a quart of tea, coke, or what not.

[Mick]

I must say that all of those fit me, except the chicken feet and pigs blood. No wonder Li sometimes calls me a Da Wei Dan....Big Bad Egg!

[SheLikesME?]

I want to comment but just dont know what to say. Most on the list don't fit me.

 

My wife had a 3 way with me and her daughter this AM on the skype. I didn't know it was possible. Then her sister got on instead of our daughter. I felt so wonderful. Gee we were all together again. I could smell and see the food, bathrooms, and breath. It was heartfelt and wonderful.

 

I have to seperate myself from China when I am here or I kinda get depressed, or ready to fight.

Edited June 27, 2006 by SheLikesME (see edit history)

[A Mafan]

...you probably need to be a little more careful with your word choice, there....

[Tom]

I could smell and see the food, bathrooms, and breath.  It was heartfelt and wonderful.

226903[/snapback]

I can relate well (except for the smelling of the bathrooms part - I'm trying to not think about that so much). The rest is good, though.

[Tom]

...you probably need to be a little more careful with your word choice, there....

226918[/snapback]

:roller:

Edited June 27, 2006 by Tom (see edit history)

[SheLikesME?]

haha, if you mean the phone conversation, well ok then. B) Never entered my mind. If it is word choice about fighting well that is another issue. I just try to channel the energy toward making money and preparing for their arrival.

 

Hey the vision and smell of the bathroom, though not always pleasent, is still tied to love, love of the chinese and the good business friends I made, as well as the strong love with my wife and all the things associated with her. China is like heaven to me, and when they got on the phone, 3-way , I was in heaven again for a moment. It is odd I could visualize as if I wear there and smell it for a moment. Sure felt warm and good to me. The smell was more of the food, or her kitchen.

 

Odd that they are so clean and don't have a scent and yet the oders in China, huh?

Edited June 27, 2006 by SheLikesME (see edit history)

[A Mafan]

haha, if you mean the phone conversation, well ok then.  B) Never entered my mind. If it is word choice about fighting well that is another issue.  I just try to channel the energy toward making money and preparing for their arrival.

 

Hey the vision and smell of the bathroom, though not always pleasent, is still tied to love, love of the chinese and the good business friends I made, as well as the strong love with my wife and all the things associated with her.  China is like heaven to me, and when they got on the phone, 3-way , I was in heaven again for a moment.  It is odd I could visualize as if I wear there and smell it for a moment.  Sure felt warm and good to me.  The smell was more of the food, or her kitchen.

 

Odd that they are so clean and don't have a scent and yet the oders in China, huh?

226935[/snapback]

If you don't know where the problematic wording is, then it's all good. I applaud your innocence.

[SheLikesME?]

haha, if you mean the phone conversation, well ok then.   Never entered my mind. If it is word choice about fighting well that is another issue.  I just try to channel the energy toward making money and preparing for their arrival.

 

Hey the vision and smell of the bathroom, though not always pleasent, is still tied to love, love of the chinese and the good business friends I made, as well as the strong love with my wife and all the things associated with her.  China is like heaven to me, and when they got on the phone, 3-way , I was in heaven again for a moment.  It is odd I could visualize as if I wear there and smell it for a moment.  Sure felt warm and good to me.  The smell was more of the food, or her kitchen.

 

Odd that they are so clean and don't have a scent and yet the oders in China, huh?

226935[/snapback]

If you don't know where the problematic wording is, then it's all good. I applaud your innocence.

226938[/snapback]

ha, my wife get son my case about my bad english, so probably more like stupidity.