Boy are you fat!

[chinadave2001]

For me, one of the most difficult things to adjust to in China was the very straightfoward assessment that I was fat. I am a big man, no doubt about it. Built like a NFL lineman - 280 lbs and all that. Nevertheless, people here in the US never make a comment directly to me about my weight. When I was in China, people would come up to me in the street, and in their very best English, say "Hi. You are very fat!" Even those who couldn't speak English would use hand gestures, followed by a thumbs up, to convery the same meaning. Taxi drivers always feel the need to communicate this idea.

 

At first I was really angry and thought that these Chinese people were very rude and ill mannered. Later it was explained to me that it was really more of a compliment - that in a country like China which had suffered so many famines that being overweight was seen as a sign of prosperity and an easy life. Folks that were commenting on my weight were either complimenting me on my good fortune or jealous. Now, I am still not sure I buy all that but after a repeated such compliments, my skin finally got thicker and I got over it. The best was when I asked my fiance about my weight - did it bother her? "No," she replied, " I like a fat man!"

 

Dave

[owenkrout]

Your not the only one, my friend. My wife constantly walks by, pats my belly and says, "Ponpon!" (Fat). Actually they are right. The Budda look is admired.

[Lurker]

Is it equally admired in men and women?

[Myles]

Aloha from Hawaii,

When I was in Hangzhou in October I went to a health fair in the middle of town. Among the

health products was the Chinese equivalent of Slim Fast. It was called Slim Quick. Many quick

changes in China.

Myles aka Annakuen'GG

[tonado]

Not many Chinese are so huge. When they see a 280 lb man, they probably wonder how you got to be so big. I think it is more of a curiosity factor than admiration. However, I don't think they are trying to insult you. In many Chinese movies, fat woman is definitely not admired.

[Charlotte]

Not many Chinese are so huge. When they see a 280 lb man, they probably wonder how you got to be so big.  I think it is more of a curiosity factor than admiration.  However, I don't think they are trying to insult you.  In many Chinese movies, fat woman is definitely not admired.

Tony's comment is more true to the fact that very few Chinese are overweight. When my hubby and I were in Shanghai, everywhere we go, people would look at him and some even wanted to pose for pictures with him with their camera. Overweight is not admirable, nor is the symbol of wealth. But a foreign devil like my hubby in Shanghai does look like a tourist attraction, especially his beer belly. My hubby even teased himself that he would pose as Buddha on a park bench to collect some money --

 

Years of American life certainly turned me into a chubby girl -- it was a rude awakening last summer in Shanghai that all my clothes would end up XL and XXL in China. What happened: I thought I was the most slender in my office and wear a moderate medium size, not skinny, but certainly not overweight by American standard. But my friends and family were ruthless when they saw me: Oh, you are fatter now than last time!

 

Chinese like to comment on your appearance (health wise) when they see each other again. Get used to it while in China.

It is considered very rude in US to do so. Please JMs avoid the weight comment, esp. to your in-laws.

[owenkrout]

One major change that is happening is that there are now many overweight Chinese children. The parents and especially grandparents tend to look upon it as a sign of a healthy child. It is getting wide spread enough that the government is starting to have a media campaign about it not being a good thing. Part of the problem, honestly, is that the child sits at a school desk all day and then the parents make them take extra lessons in the evening. The result is little physical exercise.

 

As for me, I attract so much attention that my wife says we should charge 2 RMB for every picture people want to take of them with me. According to where we are as to what they see me as. In Shanghai it is "Old Man Christmas" in more politically correct Shenyang, it is usually, "Marx".

[chinadave2001]

It is getting wide spread enough...

 

No pun intended?

[Mick]

Now I am not slim by any means, but I am not grossly overweight eitherr. Five feet nine inches and 182 lbs. as of this morning. Yet by Chinese standards, I am on up there in tonnage.

 

Interestingly enough, on the first date Li and I ever had, five years ago, we were walking together on a street in Hefei. We had talked about many things that day and were experiencing a lull in the conversation. The quietness was broken when she turned to me and said:

 

"You remind me of my brother-in-law, you are both fat".

 

 

We still joke about this even to today. To say someone is fat in China does not mean the same thing it means in America.

 

Fat can also mean, "healthy and energetic". Of course, my students who say this may just be trying to be kind.

[tonado]

Fat can also mean, "healthy and energetic". Of course, my students who say this may just be trying to be kind.     

Mick,

 

I think they are trying to be kind. Did they say "Fai Low"? You should definitely watch the Chinese movie "Love on a Diet".

 

Actually, my gal loves me because I am not too thin (5 feet 8.5 and 156 lbs). There is a lot of Chinese guys that are too thin (like starving people in Africa). I think girl prefers a fat guy over a thin guy if she has to choose. The bigger he is, the better security (like a big teddy bear).

[floyd]

Well, I would get some comment on my weight, and also on a grey hair or two. I still think it is a little of the case of pick on the foreigner, as after I started making comments back they quickly stopped, or at least switched the comment to Chinese so I could not understand. They would say, you should buy some weights to excersise more, and I would agree, and say they should buy some to make sure a strong wind would not blow them away. They would say I must not be able to bend down (which I can just fine), and I later say something about how they can not reach up to get a book off a high shelf, they would comment on me looking old with a grey hair, and I would say they look old due to a wrinkle. The reactions to my commenting back, and the ceasation to the comments afterwards lead me to believe they were pushing based on me staying too polite to comment back.

[tonado]

Well,  I would get some comment on my weight, and also on a grey hair or two.  I still think it is a little of the case of pick on the foreigner, as after I started making comments back they quickly stopped, or at least switched the comment to Chinese so I could not understand.  They would say,  you should buy some weights to excersise more, and I would agree, and say they should buy some to make sure a strong wind would not blow them away.  They would say I must not be able to bend down (which I can just fine), and I  later say something about how they can not reach up to get a book off a high shelf,  they would comment on me looking old with a grey hair, and I would say they look old due to a wrinkle.  The reactions to my commenting back, and the ceasation to the comments afterwards lead me to believe they were pushing based on me staying too polite to comment back.

A polite way to fight back is to say"When typhoon hits, I will be the only person standing. You will blow away like a feather".

[Guest hopeful]

This is a really interesting topic and I just want to follow Charlotte's post by adding that the size chart in China is very different from that in the US.... most Chinese women are likely to be petite and I have quite a few friends who actually have to buy boy's jeans since they can't find anything else that would fit them here in the US. I have been commented by my colleagues in the US as "so slim that you are going to be blown away by wind", however, last time I was in China, when I was reaching for a shirt in M size, the saleslady actually stopped me and said "no, you won't be able to fit into that, you have to get an XL!"

It is sad to find out that I was not perceived as being slim anymore in China;

Good news is, I actually fit into the M size perfectly.

[floyd]

 The reactions to my commenting back, and the ceasation to the comments afterwards lead me to believe they were pushing based on me staying too polite to comment back.

A polite way to fight back is to say"When typhoon hits, I will be the only person standing. You will blow away like a feather". B) B)

Yes, this is very similar to just what I did say. And with a smile and in a far more jovial manner then they used. What makes me think that they were really just being rude (like the orginally poster wondered about), was the reaction when I started commenting in this manner myself. If it was truly ok in their culture they would have taken the comment back in stride, instead they at times dropped their jaws, and stopped talking on this topic from then on. So it seems they were trying to hide behind the culture, and counted on me to not 'adapt' to it so quickly.

[owenkrout]

This leads to an interesting point about China itself. It is a simple fact that everybody, men and women, average both taller and heavier up here in the Northeast than they are in the rest of China.

 

I am short by US standards. 5 foot 8 inches or 1.72 meters. When I am in Guangzhou, for instance, I still tower over most people, men and women. Up here in the Northeast though, I am about average height and it is not uncommon for even the women to be taller than me. In fact, I have two nephews who have to be pushing 7 feet or about 2 meters!

 

In addition, in most of China most of the people, men and women are very thin. They literally look like a strong wind would blow them over. People up here tend to have a heavier build. Most people are not fat, though you do see that up here, but they definately have more meat on their bones than is true in most of the rest of China.

 

I suppose that the Manchurian and Mongolian blood lines have increased the average size. Also I reckon that the the average slimly built Chinese would not last long in the cold weather up here. They would freeze to death by the end of the winter up here! We do have a few students from southern China and they always look like they are about to die from the cold, even when the local students are commenting on how nice the weather is.