BEWARE!!!

[danswayne]

I would never spit on her, but I would be glad to know if this has happened before. I was afraid of the same thing happening to me when I first came to China. That is why I told myself no girlfriend the whole year I was here. Also because I only wanted to stay in China for the one year and then move on to new things. Well that all changed when Diana walked in the door and I saw that smile. It took me a couple months for this fat, ugly foreigner to win her over, but when I did there was no looking back for her, or me either. We now spend about 24 hours a day together and I think I can speak for her too on this, we both wish we had about 10 extra hours a day to be together. I have had some girls ask me point blank, do you have a foreign friend, who needs a girlfriend, because she needs a passport. There are all kind of girls here some get lucky others don't. I have seen more bad foreigners than bad girls here in my 3 years, and that is the saddest part.

[Guest Riverguide]

Ok I will back down a little bit..maybe I was being too harsh on those 3.

 

I am sorry.....

 

I live and work in the San Francisco Bay area...I think the true melting

 

pot of america.........where I work and play, live folks from all over the world.

 

I love the idea that I can go into a meeting with 10 folks and none of them

 

are from the same country....it is fun ..stressful and a challenge all at one

 

time.

 

A lot of the folks I supervise are from all over the world....I enjoy this part

 

of my job very much....I love understanding about different cultures.....

 

Once I had a young lady who was from asia. The young lady worked her

 

butt off and did a very good job for me and the company. She was a

 

temp. and we were going to bring her on full time...we did our background

 

check and found trouble...She lied on her application...she was on

 

workmen comp. form her other job. Her boss had no idea she was able

 

to work. Her friends and faimly came out of the woodwork to support her

 

they try to convince me that where she came from it was part of everyday

 

life to lie on a applications to get a job....Was she a bad person....i don't

 

think so....however....I couldn't hire her because of the lie....I took a lot of

 

crap from her friends...and I felt bad about it.....however...she was out on

 

workman comp. form her old company ( being paid by our tax $ )while

 

working at my company....... she commited fraud...........

 

Here is a case where a young lady lied and lost her job over it....even

 

though in her mind and in the mind of her family..she did no wrong.....

 

 

Maybe Ring thinks she did no wrong....maybe this type of thing happens

 

more then we would like to think...however

 

.....honesty is still what we are measured by

 

at the end of the day....

 

Maybe Ring did get sold a bill of goods by this guy in China.....maybe the

 

pull for his love and the disire to come too ameirca did tear her apart

 

inside........but she crossed a line a normal person would not do....

 

So before we all start feeling too sorry for her and try to justify her actions

 

because of love, education, culture or her desire to live in the USA.

 

Understand that she saw that line and made an effort to cross it on her

 

own.......she commited fraud.....and the thought that some folks would

 

try and say PJ was at fault....makes me sick....folks have got to own what

 

they do and not do...excusses don't cut it.....

 

 

Ok....I am sorry that I rambled......

 

Just my thoughts.

 

Riverguide

[PJ]

ynot,

 

*sigh* well, I was just starting to calm down the past two days, but these recent postings I can feel the sense of frustration rising again.

 

Let me ask you this. What if I was less intelligent and fell for her and her husband's plan? What if I had fell for her and her boyfriend/husband (call him what you want, you've seen the letter) little charade? Although they didn't mention specifics, there was a definite intent to "be together" in the future.

 

How would they accomplish this? Obviously, the intention was for her to come to America, and for them to be together eventually. What would they do? Wait until after I have spent the money I saved up for my "fiancee" to send her to college, buy her a car, and leverage my contacts to help her find a good job? She was more than open to the idea of me supporting her while she studied, learned english, learned to drive, and found a good job.

 

I always told her she was free to be a homemaker, a career woman, a scholar, whatever she chose to be. I would support her in the beginning, of course, since would not have the financial means to do so herself. I just sort of figured in the long run, we would support each other and it would all balance out. I didn't figure her plan was "let P.J. support me until I get educated, get a car, a green card, and then give him the boot for my old flame."

 

All I have done is my best to ensure that these two will *not* be able to find another American to use and discard in this manner. And believe me, now that I have better insight on their character, I would not put it past the two of them to hop back on the "plotting and scheming to a better future" bandwagon.

 

You are, of course, free to express your opinions here, and I do apologize to you if I sound harsh. My intent is not to attack you, rather, I feel very strongly about my stance, and about what she tried to do to me and to my family.

 

P.J.

[Guest R2D2]

You forgot to mention that they are frauding me and other citizens of the United States. This is why my poor loved ones have to wait so long.

[owenkrout]

Danswayne has some very good points.

 

On my first trip to China I was on a tour with five other American professors. We were constantly approached by women wanting someone for a fake marriage to get a visa to the US. Coincidence or not, it is a fact that this only happened in the southern part of China and once in Shandong. I have never been approached like that in the north of China except for the one time in Shandong and that was by a prostitute and her madam. (Not a judgement, a fact. OK, if you don't want to help with a visa would you like to "buy" the girl for the night?) They were like leeches on the group, we finally had to walk over toward the police station to get them to leave us alone. It happened in our interpreters home town and she was almost to die with embaressment that it would have happened there. She felt personally responsible. (BTW of the six people, two were Quakers, one was a Morman and one was openly gay. She was fishing in the wrong waters)

 

The second point is that I would agree that I have seen more bad foreigners than bad Chinese. Bad teachers and those here just to womanize (what is the term when a woman does it?) and/or party party party. Well, maybe not literally more bad foreigners, but the percentage is definately a lot higher.

[danswayne]

I feel very sorry for PJ aka Phatkat, and I have seen some people here who would do the same thing in the drop of a hat. I also can say that you can judge some people here just by looking sometimes, and I agree the boyfriend does not look too trusting. I can always tell who the thief is on the bus here in Changsha for some reason, and I would be very careful around that guy. I have stopped some thieves here by the way and the whole bus was happy there was a big nosed foreigner on the bus when it happened. I have worked with the government of Hunan for over a year, because I am not just a teacher here I also help a Charity Foundation from Tennessee. So I have seen all kinds of people here, people I would trust with a million dollars, and then some people who make satan look trustworthy. Diana has showed me the best side of China, and that is why we both plan to make it our future home if this mess ever gets cleared up in GZ. The more I have read the board the past day or two the happier I am her family is trying their best to keep me in China, even if I have to fight them all the time to stop feeding me like the pig I am.

[Guest enight]

P.J,

 

first I am very glad to see you are coming back to normal

 

second ...

 

so far, I have seen too much doubts in the whole thing, I am afraid that you might have been tricked by someone else intendly.

 

let me give you some reasons here...

 

1.

I am not Ring's friend, and actually we are almost strangers, we got to know each other was under you P.J's requirment in last year, and she wrote me an email on 2002, Dec 1. I replied but never heard from her again.

 

the second mail I got from her was 2003, Feb 20, she sent me a short note just for checking my email address.

 

 

 

Hi kate:

I am Ring,are you remember me?i am arrived in

Tampa at 16Feb afternoon,what date are you come to

here?if you received my e-mail,please let me know.

Ring

 

 

then it happened the case,

 

on Feb 21, 15:10 I suddently got 2 strange emails from her, one is

 

My American fiancee PJ found out that I have a husband

in China. Now I will have to go back to China.

 

another one email is the conversation between her and her 'husband'

 

P.J,

 

do you notice the difference with the 2 emails?

 

1. she didn't use capital words so much proper as she did in the second email?

 

2. I am not a close friend of her, or you can say I am a stranger to her, why would she sent me these emails especially the one with her and her 'husband's coveration?

 

3. her English seems not in a same level between the 2 letters.

[Guest enight]

P.J,

 

first I am very glad to see you are coming back to normal

 

second ...

 

so far, I have seen too much doubts in the whole thing, I am afraid that you might have been tricked by someone else intendly.

 

let me give you some reasons here...

 

1.

I am not Ring's friend, and actually we are almost strangers, we got to know each other was under you P.J's requirment in last year, and she wrote me an email on 2002, Dec 1. I replied but never heard from her again.

 

the second mail I got from her was 2003, Feb 20, she sent me a short note just for checking my email address.

 

 

 

Hi kate:

  I am Ring,are you remember me?i am arrived in

Tampa at 16Feb afternoon,what date are you come to

here?if you received my e-mail,please let me know.

                                        Ring

 

 

then it happened the case,

 

on Feb 21, 15:10 I suddently got 2 strange emails from  her, one is

 

My American fiancee PJ found out that I have a husband

in China.  Now I will have to go back to China.

 

another one email is the conversation between her and her 'husband'

 

P.J,

 

do you notice the difference with the 2 emails?

 

1. she didn't use capital words so much proper as she did in the second email?

 

2. I am not a close friend of her, or you can say I am a stranger to her, why would she sent me these emails especially the one with her and her 'husband's coveration?

 

3. her English seems not in a same level between the 2 letters.

then on the night 21:30,

 

I got the last letter which is not only sent to me but also sent to other 13 people (and I recognized one name of a girl I know who doesn't know her well too)

 

´ó¼Ò

 

ÎÒµÄÃÀ¹úfiancee

·¢ÏÖÎÒÓÐÕÉ·òÔÚÖйú¡£ÏÖÔÚÎÒ±ØÐëÈ¥»ØÖйú¡£

 

need find a new ÃÀ¹úfiancee spnsor. you can help me?

 

hes upset becuase sees here letter to chinese husband.

 

http://www.001.com.cn/forum/usa/111901.html

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index....9402c83d2da983

 

 

"zhenlun mo" <mozhenlun@yahoo.com.cn>

 

ºÃÀÏÆÅ£¬

 

ÎҺ÷µºÃ¶àÀ²£¬²»¹ýÖÙ³ÉÈÕåí¶Ç£¬ÊÕµ½ÄãemailºÃ¿ªÐÄ°¡¸Ð¾õºÜÎÂů¡£ÒѾ­ºÃËÆÎÞ·¢

ÉÕÀ²¡£ºÜÏëÄãÄÜÏ°¹ßÄDZߵÄÉú»î£¬ÖªµÀÄãÿÌ춼ÊÇ°ëÒ¹ÐÑÎÒºÜÐÄÍ´¡£ÎÒ»áÕÕ¹Ë×Ô¼º

µÄ£¬ÄãÒ²Òª°¡£¬Ï£Íû·Ö¿ªµÄʱºò´ó¼Ò¶¼ÄÜŬÁ¦£¬ÄÇôÖؾ۵Äʱºò¾Í»áºÜÐÒ¸£¡£

 

¾ÍÊÇÕâ¸öÐÅÄî¸øÎÒËùÓеĶ¯Á¦µÄ£¬ÄãÕæÊÇÎÒµÄÈ«²¿£¬Äܸоõµ½Âð£¿

 

ÎÒ°ÑÎÒÃÇÈ¥ÉÕ¿¾µÄÕÕƬ·¢ÔÚÏÂÒ»·âemailÀïÃ棬Äã²é¸½¼þ¾Í¿ÉÒÔ¿´µ½ÁË¡£

 

 

°®ÄãµÄ´óè

 

ÏþÓ¾ Öì <hillringzhu@yahoo.com.cn> wrote:

ÎÒÇ×°®µÄÀϹ«£º

 

ÄãÒÀ¼Òϵ¶È×öʲôѽ£¿ÎÒÇÙÍíѵµ½½ñÔç3µã°ë¾ÍÆð×óÉíÀ²£¬ÄãÒÀ¼ÒÓÐÎÞ¼û

ºÃµãѽ£¿ÖÙÓÐÎÞ·¢ÉÕ£¿¼ÇסÒû¶àµãË®ºÍ³Ôҩѽ£¬¹ãÖݲ¡¾ú¶à£¬ÎÒÕæϵºÃµ£ÐÄÄãѽ£¬

 

Äã¿ìµãºÃ·µÀ² Ring

 

 

 

 

 

_________________________________________________________

Do You Yahoo!?

"ÓÃÑÅ»¢ËÑË÷£¬ÕÒµ½¹ØÓÚ°Â˹¿¨µÄÒ»ÇÐ"

http://cn.search.yahoo.com/search/cn?p=%b0...%c2%cb%b9%bf%a8

 

 

 

first, the Chinese way she wrote was not proper,

 

second, look at the english words she was using, was it same level as the previous letters?

 

third, why did she wrote to us this? and why did she even quote the links there? and also came along with the coversation between her and her 'husband'???

 

P.J please open your eyes widely, and be careful, I am afraid someone out there is tricking on you.

[PJ]

Kate,

 

As I believe I mentioned, Ring and I had separate rooms here. I wanted her to feel comfortable and to be able to get to know her slowly, thus she had her own bedroom. I gave her a computer to use in there. She often locked the door and spent hours on the computer, which I found out later, was conversing with her boyfriend/husband.

 

After I called her out on the boyfriend/husband and told her she would be going back to China as soon as humanly possible, she went in to her room and locked the door.

 

As far as IP address, we had identical ones to the outside. Both of our computers run to a single router. This router reports a single IP address to the external world, and internally distributes IP addresses starting with 192.168.1.x. Since my ISP requires one to pay per IP address, it made sense for that IP address to actually map to a router on the Internet.

 

Since then, her parents have confessed to knowing about the boyfriend/husband. They didn't tell me apparently, because they had hopes she would come here, and start a new life. There is a lot about this guy's background that sounded none too flattering, in her mother's words. I will not go into detail. Her uncle also apologized, apparently he knew and had similar hopes. Finally, she herself confessed to my father on the drive to the airport.

 

At this point, I am content to believe that I am not being "tricked" by someone trying to "ruin" her. I do wish the best of luck to her and hope she lands on her feet well ... I just hope she doesn't land herself another American fiancee in the hopes of trying this again.

 

P.J.

[PJ]

Incidentally, I found out through a relative who is friends with their family (I mentioned that she was a friend of the family), that this "guy" came looking for her at her parents house recently.

 

Had she decided that she loved this guy so much, she should have told me "look I have met someone here in China and I love him, sorry ..." I would respect that. However, to decide to plot and use me, that I cannot respect.

 

P.J.

[Guest enight]

Kate,

 

As I believe I mentioned, Ring and I had separate rooms here.  I wanted her to feel comfortable and to be able to get to know her slowly, thus she had her own bedroom.  I gave her a computer to use in there.  She often locked the door and spent hours on the computer, which I found out later, was conversing with her boyfriend/husband.  

 

After I called her out on the boyfriend/husband and told her she would be going back to China as soon as humanly possible, she went in to her room and locked the door.  

 

As far as IP address, we had identical ones to the outside.  Both of our computers run to a single router.  This router reports a single IP address to the external world, and internally distributes IP addresses starting with 192.168.1.x.  Since my ISP requires one to pay per IP address, it made sense for that IP address to actually map to a router on the Internet.

 

Since then, her parents have confessed to knowing about the boyfriend/husband.  They didn't tell me apparently, because they had hopes she would come here, and start a new life.  There is a lot about this guy's background that sounded none too flattering, in her mother's words.  I will not go into detail.  Her uncle also apologized, apparently he knew and had similar hopes.  Finally, she herself confessed to my father on the drive to the airport.

 

At this point, I am content to believe that I am not being "tricked" by someone trying to "ruin" her.  I do wish the best of luck to her and hope she lands on her feet well ... I just hope she doesn't land herself another American fiancee in the hopes of trying this again.

 

P.J.

P.J

 

you are a very smart and talent guy, and you are so strong mind, I am always impressed by your intelligence,

 

and I do pray for you... one day the God brings you a right girl into your life

 

and whatever, the girl and her story is past, it's a history now. so kick out all those dark days out of your life, and ...

 

... Alan and I are glad to see you are coming back to normal, and if there is something we can do for release your pain from this accident case, please let us know.

 

best regards.

[Myles]

Hi Kate,

You are very observant and it is very interseting.

Myles aka Annakuen'GG

[PJ]

Yes, Kate, you do have exceptional intelligence and a sharp eye for detail. You are also very technically sharp, and I am sure that you will find a great job here in the U.S. and probably have a wonderful career.

 

I do admire and appreciate your ideas, and wish what you said could be true, that I was mistaken. But all the evidence afterward, the guy looking for her ... her whole family and her confessing ... I really can't see the truth being otherwise.

 

P.J.