jemmyell Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 Hello, My SO wants me to come to China as soon as I can since she believes (from reading many posts here) that the number of visits is a prime deciding factor during the interview. I used all my vacation time plus I borrowed 2 days to visit her in October. Will it be better if I visit again at Spring Break / Easter or during her interview? Either way that will be my second visit. My big worry is that if I go for Easter then I CANNOT go for the interview or an emergency overcome attendance. Please give me some advice! -James Link to comment
Yuanyang Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 So does my wife however, her needs are for emotional support. Now I'm just back after my 3rd trip in 11 months. So I don't anticipate any issues with the number of visits to China since filing. Nevertheless, I'll go back ASAP. I don't like to only because I want time with her and our daughter after they get back to the USA. I don't think the Family Leave Act covers that. Link to comment
david_dawei Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 I'm glad to hear your SO is reading info here ! Frankly, it is best that both are understanding and talking, as you guys are obviously doing. here are some comments I have previously made on this topic... http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?...ndpost&p=171177 --- If I simply go by the premise that you will only go one more time (prior to interview or interview), I would simply recommend that this be a joint decision. I think that as long as two trips are taken [in the end], I don't see the VO as using either one against you necessarily... because the VO will not be aware of the second trip (or any) till a question is asked about it or your passport [copy] is asked for. In either trips case, the answer is 'two trips'... But you can be assured that it will most likely be asked. I personally think there is more bonding and celebration (and emotional help in overcome) to be present at the interview. But, if your SO is of the opinion that another trip prior to the interview is what is really necessary for her sake, and she has no issue with going alone to GUZ, etc... then I'd do what she wants. ( Is there a chance of losing an opportunity to go at the interview if you wait till then? ) Your very early in the process, but good to look ahead at even issues regarding the interview. My entire process was solely focused on this [final] event and so I think you are doing right to ask questions about it... Good luck. Link to comment
Randy W Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 2 trips - one in Feb., one in July, none for interview (due to a lack of vacation time). We felt it was more important to maintain the relationship. Link to comment
Guest ShaQuaNew Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 I think it's natural for any couple anywhere to want to be together. The US has the daunting task of weeding out those that are trying to skam immigration policies with sham marriages. Unless one does NOT work and has unlimited funds, it's quite a challenge to make more than two trips to China over the course of one year. If one is making trips to China using a credit card, they will also be left with the burden of paying off that credit card once a visa is issued. We all must tread the thin line from being financially irresponsible and getting ourselves fired because of missing so much time from work. Whether or not a couple has a bonafide relationship must be measured subjectively by a VO. Many trips to China does NOT a bonafide relationship make. It may be VERY difficult for some to make more than one trip to China over the course of one year. If that's the case for you, don't be discouraged. If your relationship is indeed bonafide you are likely using other means to communicate one with another, these methods include email, telephone, snail mail, cards, flowers, etc. Link to comment
Meidon Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 Not that I have unlimited funds but i was in china 3 times and will be there a fourth time before years end to pick up my laopoo. Link to comment
Guest ShaQuaNew Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 Anyone having a sincere relationship with their partner is likely to visit them in China as many times as they can. I don't think it wise to pursue a line of thinking you MUST vist China "X" number of times to be approved a visa. With only a "very few" exceptions, a visa is more likely to be disapproved for those having poor record keeping skills. Link to comment
frank1538 Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 That's a tough choice. For me, being there to help Jingwen and the kids navigate through paying the fees, getting the medical results/vaccinations, and prepping for the interview was as important as the previous trips to be with her. I guess I'd answer the question this way. If you're rock solid in your relationship, I'd probably opt to go during the interview. Your SO can still legitimately say that you've been to visit more than once. On the other hand, if you want to continue to develop the relationship, go now. Link to comment
shyaushu Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 Good question, but who can really say? It's clear from the post today about reversing the grotesque decision the same day this is a crap shoot. If you've been together in China as much as is reasonably possible (work, finances, heartache, etc.) then you just go with what you have. Obviously, either decision could easily be the "wrong" one, depending on the interviewer. Link to comment
bobmal99 Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 Having just gone through it I would say it is more important to be at the interview. However, I realize everyones situation is extremely different. Had I not been at the interview who knows how much time may have been added to our waiting for the kids visa's. You have plenty of time to think about it, take your time and make a decision based on your situation, which I know nothing about.. There are literally hundreds of women every week having successful interviews and getting their visa, without their fiances present at the Consulate... Most men go for the emotional support that can not be overlooked. Of course your fiance will say she does not need you there. These Chinese women are a very proud group of individuals. But just think of how impressed she will be if you are there. And if there are any complications, you are there ready and waiting, for whatever... Best of luck with your decision... Link to comment
jemmyell Posted November 28, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 Having just gone through it I would say it is more important to be at the interview. However, I realize everyones situation is extremely different. Had I not been at the interview who knows how much time may have been added to our waiting for the kids visa's. You have plenty of time to think about it, take your time and make a decision based on your situation, which I know nothing about.. There are literally hundreds of women every week having successful interviews and getting their visa, without their fiances present at the Consulate... Most men go for the emotional support that can not be overlooked. Of course your fiance will say she does not need you there. These Chinese women are a very proud group of individuals. But just think of how impressed she will be if you are there. And if there are any complications, you are there ready and waiting, for whatever... Best of luck with your decision... 172221[/snapback]Hello, Yes it is a very hard decision. I can afford the trip, but I do not have time available from work. Taking a leave of absence would jeapordize my employment. So, I was planning to go for the interview, but my SO thinks she can handle this alone. I am tentatively planning a trip for March with my Daughter, so she can meet my SO and her Daughter. BUT I am VERY concerned that this will make me unable to help with the interview. At the projected interview time I should have a full two weeks vacation, and if I get to GUZ the night before that will give plenty of time for emergency overcomes or almost two weeks of joyous celebration. That was my plan..... However, having been married for 20 years prior (I am a widower) I know that the husbands plans are DEFINITELY subject to review... Thanks for all the input, we are now looking for feedback from 001 since my SO has asked the same question there. -James Link to comment
drive_75 Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 I'm not sure if there is any relationship between the two but I have been to China six times in one years. I just returned from my 7th trips. I have to say that it is very tiring but I love spending time with her and we always have these vacation together inside China. Through these vacation time, we learned a lot about each other. We argue, make up and understand the limit of each other's patience limit. I think that I would suggest everyone visit their SO more frequently to find out the true them. Make sure that you can love them for what they really are. Everytime, I'm there I learn more about her. This last trip we did a lot of adventrous like hiking and horseback riding. A lot of these activities can bring the best and worst of everyone. Link to comment
SallyHon Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 Can the USC accompany her/his SO through the whole interview process, including VO interview? Thanks... Link to comment
Guest ShaQuaNew Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 I'm not sure if there is any relationship between the two but I have been to China six times in one years. I just returned from my 7th trips.172236[/snapback]Seven (7) times in one year....... Holy Moly! Link to comment
warpedbored Posted November 28, 2005 Report Share Posted November 28, 2005 Can the USC accompany her/his SO through the whole interview process, including VO interview? Thanks...172242[/snapback]No the US citizen has to wait outside. Tough call on whether two trips and not go to interview or two trips including the interview. Logic says two trips is two trips. I would have to lean in favor of going to the interview since that would give you the extra option of being there to help should there be a denial. Also there is the factor of being there to give her emotional support as well as confidence. Link to comment
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