skibum

We went to Denver yesterday to finish the AOS requirements - give them 3 pictures and the old green card. She got a stamp in her passport that says she is here legally but now has no green card. If she wanted to leave the USA she would need another stamp to be able to get back in. New card should be here in a couple of weeks. The new appointment system appears to be helping. No crowds, no lines. We did have to wait 45min after our appointment time. The waiting room was less than half full. The govt did something good!

I think everyone isn missing the important thing here -Merc"s SO is TELLING HIM what to do. A bad start!

In a small hotel I slept on a wooden bed one night. Not as bed as I expected. If you want to buy one of those sheets that the quilt goes inside, try overstock.com They had some last time I looked.

In China, wouldn't it be a green flag for something bad? After all, when the market goes up, the numbers are in red. When I spent time in China with her, I would give her money so she could pay for our meals, train tickets and such. I felt I would be insulting her by offering more money as she made plenty and gave most to her parents for their old age. Not that they need it much either but they worry about getting sick and having medical expenses.

The CS sweetie went to looked at her vaccination record, signed off and did not charge a thing. The record had English and Chinese.

I would not worry that it is a red flag, money is just a way of keeping score with the women. iBut why do you start sending money anyway?

I agree, notrevorich. But Moose got suckered - instead of sending more money, just have her say that you are sending more!

Dennis, I hope you did not take it that I thought she was scamming you. I think that the lack of compassion is a combination of the families taking care of themselves and not worrying about others and the lack of money from the govt for medical care. Look at the amount of stealing also. No respect for others. But, I still love it there.

Dennis, I have no doubt that your woman was destitute but when in China you have to watch out for scams. In Nanjing there is a skinny boy that has his leg hooked behind his head and moves around on a big board with wheels. He looks pitiful and many people give him money. But, the guy that drives him and some others to work, gets the money. Same with the little girls selling flowers. By giving them money, you encourage begging. Just like the bums on the street corners here. You did good however but did you ever figure out what the guy was upset about?

Thanks for all the answers. I guess I always assumed that the 3 month period of the visa was a good thing. I still think it is a good idea to allow the SO to she if she likes her new living conditions and community. But, like I said, we did not take advantage of it anyway. Her parents are pretty laid back and never said anything about us getting married there. Anyway- alls well that ends well - hope these love stories never end!

We never discussed getting married in China and the thought never occured to me. I just assumed that we would take the three months on the visa to see if she liked it here. As it turned out, we got married the day after she got here! But, what makes you want to get married in China?

Thanks for the reply. The more details you give the better we can help. To me it sounds like a broken relationship but you did not say if she wants to come back. As my son told me one time when I was broken up over a Asian girl -"There are probably 500,000 other single women over there." That was the best thing that ever happened to me as I kept looking and found the perfect woman.

Great letter. It may take a month to get a reply as the last letter I wrote was held for security reasons. If you do not get a reply in a month, PM me and I will see what phone number I can pull up.

I was 62 when we went thru the process and I did not sense any hint of age discrimination. But my wife is a lot younger than yours.

Yirong is hard for most Americans but once they hear it there is no problem. She was excited when a neighbor's boy came over and pronounced it right. If she is writing someone, she sometimes puts (e-ron) after her name. I would not want to call her something else as it is a part of her and our relationship. I was asked by a girl to give her a name the first time I went to China. I suggested "Courtney" as that was the name of a girl renting a room from me. She did not like as she thought it was a mans name. I wonder if this is a fad or part of westernization. Maybe they all hope to go to the USA.

Joanne, I think of non-Christians in the same manner that I think of all people. And religion would never be a factor in what I think of them.. People are people no matter what religion or color or nationality. But then again, I am not a Christian. I think that most of us who found a love in China knew the religious atmosphere there and knew what they were getting into. There is no reason two people in the same family cannot practice their own religion. I hope everyone gets this straight before marriage.

May I ask why this happened?

A Chinese girl died yesterday after eating a dead,sick chicken. Her brother is ill. I am not trying to start a panic but just thought it was something you should be aware of.

I thought about this when we were in the black hole. But I think that the disadvantages of being illegal are not worth it. Of course if you are dirt poor and don't need to go to college and such, it is a good deal. Have any of you read about the Shanghai 30 (I think it is 30) on the Consular Affairs web site? I bet those people are still here eventhough the govt knows where they are. It is their fault that my in-laws cannot get visas to visit us.

Tine, I don't remember for sure but probably NSC. The letter we got only has the Denver address.

One of my wife's instructors told her that she was smart because she is Chinese. If only he knew how hard she worked to be smart!

The same thing happened to us in Co. Fortunately her green card came soon and we used that to renew. I talked to people at the state capitol and was told that they just follow federal guidelines. I tried getting them to accept the AOS receipt but no go.

Hey Moon, I am sorry things did not work out. LOL I married a Chinese because they are the only women good enough for me! That would be my answer if anyone asked but all my friends love her so they don't need to ask.

For the record I have seen my wife in make up once and that was when we went out for dinner in Vegas after being married. She does try to keep out of the sun so she will not look like a country girl. Walking down the street she will weave along staying in the shadows. Important----when they get here tell them what is not nice to say to other people.

David, I would say that you two have your poo together!