DennisLeiqin

Warning signs will come from your gut. And, sometimes it's simply the luck of the draw whether you get a GC chaser or a life companion. Like any relationship, don't rush and take your time to truly know her. Maybe, go live there for extended periods. The love fantasy is just that. Don't fall head over heals in love from a couple of times in bed... True love is cultivated from years not hours. Suggest to her that you go live in China instead of her immigrating here...see what her reaction is.

Yeah but we need USA Cancer sticks... I checked with the local smoke shope in they are $59.00 a carton, Air Canada has them for 39.00 a carton and I can pre order them. so I think I will do that tomarrow. The many Chinese men that I know here in the states who smoke have their favorite Chinese brand. Personally, I doubt that Chinese dream of having a Marlboro nor even thought of it. Free smokes are free smokes. Just like any smoker anywhere, we have our brand that we smoke and ain't gonna change. Maybe having USA smokes might be a novelty, but why waste your money? Stick with a good American whiskey and you won't go wrong. The more expensive looking the bottle the better. In a gift box and they'll be the envy of everyone.

OMG Larry, you're kidding!

They're pretty much all the same IMO. Been going here for years and I still like it best: Ocean Star Restaurant 145 N Atlantic Blvd Ste 201 Monterey Park, CA 91754

BTW, Mick sent me a PM via Facebook. Said that he now can't post here at all. Been so quite here lately, wondering if more may have the same problem...

Someone will be along to soon to help. BTW, many Chinese ladies think it's a waste of money to spend on flowers. What will yours think?

Thank you so much for that! I really appreciated it! The thing is I don't have any chinese bank card. Do you know any local florist who accepts visa or master card? I thought they all, did these days. That's how I order. Wait a minute, what's Chinese bank card got to do with it?

Don't use Flowers.com. They did not deliver my order one year and I never recouped my money. I always call the nearest local florist to my mother's home and order direct from them.

Thanks for the good luck wishes. I know this is not a pretty story about China. I am learning I am one of many victims of some of the darker policies and methods of the China machine. I do love many aspects and people of this country, but certainly nothing about what is related to this issue. We live in modern times when this sort of thing should be a matter of the past. China is focusing too much on building its infrastructure at the peril of its naive citizens when it comes to health care. Many Chinese often say, "Why don't you just go back to America and be treated there?" It's difficult to explain that while America has the best hospitals and doctors in the world, it comes at great cost. I do not have medical insurance in the USA, and my injury would be classified as pre-existing. I am pressing my insurance company to order an emergency evacuation to the hospital in Sydney, Australia. But, it's a weekend, and the decision makers don't return to work until Monday? What's that? The hell you say? You mean your staff sips on a drink and has a leisurely weekend, while one of your covered members is awaiting an emergency evacuation? Oh, sir, your treatment will be very expensive, and must be approved at a higher level. Well, then, call them up on the phone now and tell them to get to work! If the emergency evac to Australia is approved, then my company will be on the hook to provide my monthly salary during treatment, and also reimburse me for travel expenses. Otherwise, I will have to give up all of it, go to Australia on my own dime, lose my job, and forfeit any compensation that my company would be forced to pay me if I remain in China. The US Supreme Court will rule on the legality of Obama care in June. Your pre-existing condition will be a non issue if the court rules favorably. Interestingly, I wonder if you are for or against Obama care now?

And, they continue to do it here in the states too. First a look at me. Then a look at Leiqin. Then back to me... then back to her... Leiqin notices it and is always proud that these women look. She says they are sizing us up to to see what type of Chinese woman draws a laowei.

Our context was staring at women. If we now shift this to staring at foreigners then that goes without saying... No. It's not about staring at women. It's simply whether or not they even notice. You introduced that noticing equated to ogling, staring.

Have you ever asked chinese (men and/or women) about this? Whether they will admit to notice or not is one thing... but 'why' they don't stare is the more interesting issue. Oh yes they can stare, David. I get stared at as if I am an inanimate object. There's certainly no three second rule when it comes to staring at me! Usually those hard, long stares are from men. I have asked some Chinese men do they notice, most don't understand the question.

If there is any remaining ethics left, it shows itself by men who don't ogle. It's considered demeaning to the lady and if one is married they don't dare get caught doing it either. Now David, I know very well that when an attractive woman crosses your path that you do not ogle, but you do notice. And, I certainly hope that you know that I understand and adhere to the 3 second rule when looking at an attractive woman to avoid being labeled an ogler. Still, I have difficulty understanding any man with red blood in his veins who states they didn't see or never noticed... I love my stepson, Ning. I think that he knows that I cherish him and will take care of him, if needed, just as I will take care of his mother. I think that he is just shy and introverted. I believe that much of that is from his non-western, Chinese-style nurtured upbringing that didn't lay any foundation for the love of the human touch. And, that's OK. It's just different for me. Learning is continuous. So is accepting.

No problems here - I use Firefox

Keep in mind she will need to re-certify to become a RN in your state, more than likely requiring going back to school a couple years to get a certificate. PI is the largest supplier of nurses to the US. If she attended an accredited PI nursing school, she can start to work here immediately. It's something she should check into before immigrating. http://www.ehow.com/list_6587581_accredited-nursing-schools-philippines.html

Hey Richard, good to hear from you. Hope all is good and that being big rock star in China hasn’t gone to your head. I see Chinese trophy wives driving their Mercedes, Beemers, Lexus’ etc. I see many just ordinary Asian women driving those too. Status and a show of money are very important. Chinese women often compare among each other and, IMO, not meeting up to another’s income or living standard includes some loss of face. So, is it for love or money…? When I read the article, I kept thinking ‘what’s love got to do with it?’, as that’s basically the crux of Chinese relationships. Now, I know many Chinese couples who have learned to love and have developed a love between each other no different than any western couple. Yet, I wonder, if that’s how their relationships began…with love or a partnership for a secure future. China is a society that (mostly) shows no physical affection towards one another. They weren’t hugged as children and they don’t hug their children. Public displays of affection are strictly taboo. The only public displays of affection that I notice are between those of the same sex. Still, a lot has to do with age, education, income class and area they were raised as to whether they’re outwardly affectionate or not. Speaking in generalities and from my own personal experience with the many Chinese women whom I know here in America, most Chinese women don’t kiss nor know how to kiss. Kissing isn’t depicted on their Chinese soaps and it’s not something they’re taught or have had role models like us westerners have. That doesn’t mean that they aren’t willing to learn and that they may enjoy that form of affection with an American husband, but it is just plain foreign to them. Heck, my wife and I have very good close and long-time Chinese women friends who still stiffen up like a board when/if I try to give them a hug. Then there are others who have embraced ( ) the western style of greetings by hugs. Again, a lot has to do with age and background. Their Chinese world and our western worlds are just that, two very different worlds where acceptable social norms are very different. And, some just never thaw to our western ways. Back to the article...if women marry for money, I wonder if some Chinese women hope and expect that they will be living in the lap of luxury and prosperity by marrying an American man? And, their disappointment after coming here and realizing that he’s not rich and there aren’t all the comforts she expected causes her to explodes with anger and rage, especially after leaving everything behind to now only feel alone, isolated and poor? Let me go a bit further with a rant on Chinese boys. Cripes, what is with some of them…androgynous, low testosterone, waif-like boys that many Chinese girls are attracted to? Heck, we had a young 19 yo Chinese college boy living with us for a while. He was tall, ran, lifted weights, worked out… yet, when I introduced him to our group of Chinese singles at our church, I see him sitting at a table alone with three very pretty Chinese coeds and, instead of engaging them, his head is buried into his cell texting away. And, then there’s this other teenage Chinese boy who goes everywhere clinging to his mother like a 4 year old child. When mom and he are sitting together, he has both arms wrapped around her arm with his head buried in her neck while his mama strokes his hair he coos up at her like a man looking at his lover. Cripes, it’s just too ef’n creepy. Yet, Chinese see nothing strange. And then there’s my wife’s son, Ning, who lives with us. He says that he doesn’t like to be touched. One weekend his good buddy, a single American man ~30, Rusty, came and stayed at our home for a weekend. I took Rusty to get a foot massage, but not wanting to be touched, Ning just sat in the lobby waiting while the massage ladies laid hands on Rusty and me. Whenever Ning is with me and if I should see an attractive woman that turns my head, he seems oblivious. He’s not gay, I am sure. But gosh darn it, he’s got no American red blooded sexual man drive equivalent within him. I just don’t get it. Heck, poor kid doesn’t even know how to hug his mama. Really, no wonder many Chinese women look at us like some exotic creature. Anyway, what was the question?

Maybe that's why he's looking offshore hoping that someone will be content enough to just sit at home simply enjoying the comforts that an American home will offer?

Here in SoCal, to get around getting audited for doing large cash transactions Chinese businessmen and women use travelers checks. Apparently, they can exchange TCs in amounts over the $10000 bank transaction that a bank must report to the IRS. Instead of keeping large sums of cash on hand, these business persons are safe and secure having travelers checks. My wife infrequently gets paid with a personal check and frequently gets paid in TCs. I guess my income is large enough that the small amount that I deposit from her income isn't significant enough to raise any flags. The only drawback to her not having deductions is that she has no SS income of her own to look forward to.

Wait a minute...just because there aren't available Asian ladies in your immediate area you choose to look on the other side of the world for one? Doesn't make any sense. While I have "TRIED" looking into a couple of dating sites here in the usa (ie. Match.com, ehaemoney.com etc) none of them seemed to have the kind of lady I was looking for. I've been trying to look in areas that I drive to (Philly, Jersey, & Tampa) but I'm never there long enough to just sit down and talk. So yeah, any suggestions, I'm all ears. J, you may know or not that I live in SoCal within the largest concentration of Asians living in the US. I am pretty active within the community too. Seems like not a week goes by that my wife isn't asked by some Chinese woman to help her find an American husband. Unfortunately, most of these women do not belong to an internet introduction site. Sitll, Chinese ladies often ask me how to go about getting connected with American men and I explain to them about Match, eHarmony etc. I have even helped a few times with help joining a site and sometimes with their profile etc. In fact, I met my wife through AsianFriendFinders where I stated in my profile that I was only looking for Asian ladies already living in the US and who could speak English. My wife was living in Alaska when we connected. The point is, there are many ladies out there. Instead of planning your vacation to PI or China you would simply plan to visit the US or Canadian city where the prospective woman lives. Anyways, that's my pitch. Can't say that I blame anyone who chooses to go on another fantasy trek to the orient either.

Interesting that Dick's wife had one (seemingly painful) speaking line in that spot. Wifie seemed to be a bit uncomfortable during that show...Wonder how many young starlets Dick had during his tenure. We probably will know fewer and fewer Dicks as time goes by...

This is OUR life... RIP Don and Dick... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0g7KawdsVSQ&feature=related

There are many who have been through what you post here. Unfortunately, there lies a very long road ahead that will be the ultimate test of your relationship. Those who have travailed will be sharing their story and advice to you shortly. So sorry to hear about this and I wish you both success in the end. Dennis

Wait a minute...just because there aren't available Asian ladies in your immediate area you choose to look on the other side of the world for one? Doesn't make any sense.

From what I can gather, she's not from a big family. No, I have not been there yet but soooooo Ready to go. We;ve chatted online for about a year, called her more times than my phone bill can handle, LOL. She's not very religious. I want so much to learn more about their culture, but many places on the net only gives bits & pieces. If I knew more, it would hopefully help me to understand more about them, LOL Allow to add to Kim's question a bit... From your posts you seem wild eyed and giddy again, which is good, but does that cloud your judgement? Meaning, what did you learn from your first try? What warnings, red flags, did you ignore that you won't this time? Why not search for someone already here? If it's an Asian woman you want, there are many here looking for a good man. Have you given them a try? From what others on this board did successfully on their second try was to marry in China, live a while or visit frequently with extended stays to develop very solid relationships before attempting to file. Are you also considering how important it is that you leave no doubt in the VO's mind that your relationship is more than just infatuation after a visit or two with email promises? Good luck to you.

Wow, great news, Lou. Give Guichun a hug for me too. Congratulations!!