DON'T KID YOURSELF: You are being watched!

[Shenzhen K-1]

 

......They are people, Roger, not saints.

 

I have never experienced a scowl from anyone - anywhere in China when traveling by myself. The only time I have seen scowls directed at me (or maybe my gal) is with my Lao Po on my arm. She is very aware of the dirty looks from her countrymen too.

 

With the shortage of women in China, it is only natural that Chinese men are not happy with white men for taking Chinese women. Consider it the equivalent of the scowls that were often cast at black men with white women in the late 60's and through the 70's.

 

There may also be a cultural component to the scowls when they come from old women. I suspect those dirty looks are directed at my gal for violating some sort of racial purity tradition. Unfortunately, I only know of the existence of it and do not know the background.

 

I believe it grows out of internal Chinese "racism" surrounding the many ethnic peoples (there is actually a Chinese word that better describes it without carrying the terrible connotative meanings that have attached to the word racisim - but I do not have my big computer with me).

 

 

Sorry Griz, but I just don't buy into any of this !!

 

It's a little over-the-top, for me.

 

It has never been my experience. Period.

 

As I stated earlier, you are the first, as I recall, to report here in this forum, that they are scowled at in "every place" they have visited.

 

I'm voting with Lil' Roger... on this one...NEVER experienced anything like this negative "scowls" in about 3 months in China over 4 trips and visiting many cities... maybe perception is everything... B)

 

Very true Wisconsin Roger, son gets more looks when we are in Wisconsin with his Bear jacket on!! Dange unloyal kid anyway!! B)

[Jeikun]

Other than drop-jawed staring like I was green or on fire or something I didn't notice too much.

 

BUT

 

There was the Chinese guy in the restaurant who after giving my wife the "What's wrong? You can't find any nice Chinese guys?" line (in Chinese) came up to me with a big fake grin and in broken ass English "You America?" (poked finger at my chest) "You U.S.A?" "O.K. USA?" (thumbs up and a bigger faker grin). Then in Chinese to Jun "Tell him my uncle was in Korean War. Killed Americans." Then tried to look menacing and waited for my responce. About then was when the restaurant owner got between us started bitching at him in Chinese and "It ok. you go. you go."

 

I'm not sure I'm ready to buy on the "getting scowls EVERYwhere" part, but neither am I inclined to side with those of you maintaining that China is a happy land of sunshine and gumdrops where we are all accepted regardless of our nationality or race.

Edited February 15, 2008 by Jeikun (see edit history)

[griz326]

Other than drop-jawed staring like I was green or on fire or something I didn't notice too much.

 

BUT

 

There was the Chinese guy in the restaurant who after giving my wife the "What's wrong? You can't find any nice Chinese guys?" line (in Chinese) came up to me with a big fake grin and in broken ass English "You America?" (poked finger at my chest) "You U.S.A?" "O.K. USA?" (thumbs up and a bigger faker grin). Then in Chinese to Jun "Tell him my uncle was in Korean War. Killed Americans." Then tried to look menacing and waited for my responce. About then was when the restaurant owner got between us started bitching at him in Chinese and "It ok. you go. you go."

 

I'm not sure I'm ready to buy on the "getting scowls EVERYwhere" part, but neither am I inclined to side with those of you maintaining that China is a happy land of sunshine and gumdrops where we are all accepted regardless of our nationality or race.

 

I have not experienced anything as extreme as you, Jeikun, but the scowls - while not ever present or even common - occur frequently and everywhere I have visited with my Lao Po.

 

It's good to know that at least one other person here doesn't feed on happy horse manure.

 

"happy land of sunshine and gumdrops" that's a good one.

[SheLikesME?]

When you bring your wife to Eureka, Montana; will she also be "watched"?

I don't know, but a lot of folks watch my wife. Men for the same reason and women with some envey. She never notices, except she commented how some started dieting in her office and she figured it was because of herself. I notice all who notice but I am not jealous. Heck I watch her too...in wonder and amazement!!!

[SheLikesME?]

Guess this thread sounded like watched form the gov. of China. No

 

Now I felt lik Elvis in one city. Everyone on the street was watching us. Had guys come up and just want to shake my hand or say howdy. Pretty cool. Could have taken advantage of some ladies but didn't in that town. Odd, so odd. I think superstars are used to this.

[tsap seui]

As a combat veteran... extreme, sustained, hard core combat at that, I would have had no problem with a Chinese guy, in his OWN country, who looked at me with distain and told me that his uncle had gone to Korea and killed americans, just so he could get my reaction.

 

My reaction? He would have either been talkin' to my back, or, if I was in a posistion that I had to give him a comment... he would have gotten a smile and a palms up (at my sides) shrug, and my telling him that I was sorry that america went to Korea. And I ain't no damn push over, wuss, either.

 

Griz, I'm not takin' you comment personal....

 

"It's good to know that at least one other person here doesn't feed on happy horse manure."

 

And I fully agree that some have on some very rose tinted glasses while in China. My woman told me on my first, and subsequent trips, that to many of her countrymen/women she is looked on as trash, a whore, and who knows what else for being seen with me. And, at the same time, I have met some of the friendliest and open people I've met in my life.

 

I don't eat happy horse shit, and, I also am not an ugly american... that thinks everyone must kow-tow to me when I am in their country. I respect others rights to their feelings when I am in their country. I don't need others to kiss my feet, I don't need everyone to smile at me, and I certainly take it in stride when they scowl or express their thoughts.

 

Negativity only gets to a person, when, THEY let it.

 

I like ya Griz, and I say with a smile on my face, if you feel, and are concentrating on the fact that you're gettin' negativity from the Chinese people, then it's your own fault. It reminds me of the profiling that GUZ does to many innocent women at their interviews. Many good are paying for a few bad.

 

Relax, have a good trip, enjoy yourself. No need to look for problems. You're probably gonna have more of a scowlin' problem when the lil' lady comes to Montana, starts growin' herself a crop of dental floss (Frank Zappa's thoughts on Montana), and the cowboys take a look at her and wonder what SHE'S doing in their neck of the woods.

 

tsap seui

Edited February 16, 2008 by tsap seui (see edit history)

[Shenzhen K-1]

 

Relax, have a good trip, enjoy yourself. No need to look for problems. You're probably gonna have more of a scowlin' problem when the lil' lady comes to Montana, starts growin' herself a crop of dental floss (Frank Zappa's thoughts on Montana), and the cowboys take a look at her and wonder what SHE'S doing in their neck of the woods.

 

tsap seui

 

Funny buddy, very funny...................

 

I had the same thoughts, gorgeous Chinese women by my side, go suck eggs boys and girls!!!!!!

[rogerinca]

Ignorance is bliss, Roger.

 

Yes. I agree.

[Rahm30]

My first trip I noticed lots of people watching me. I being a woman and not being Chinese. My sister went with me and we are both tall and bigger than Chinese woman. Women, children and especially men would stare. It wasn't a big deal, we were different. I had a child on the subway reach up and feel my hair, she just smiled and I smiled back. Her mother scolded her and I told her it was okay. One man was riding a motorcycle and wrecked it because he was staring at both my sister and I. When your different people are curious is all.

[Guest Tony n Terrific]

 

..... and scowls from men & women who do not approve of a big white guy taking a Chinese woman.

 

 

In all my visits and time with Lao Po, I have [never] observed any negative body language or looks, from anyone in Guangzhou/Huadu District. This has been affirmed by my ever watchful wife.

 

When we walk the streets of her local neighborhood, or go into any of the main areas of GZ, the looks are always of curiosity and/or positive energy. But I am always smiling and always say hello to those who look a little longer or seem to take a little more interest in our union.

 

I am a happy, cheerful guy and have always done close-up magic on the streets as an ice-breaker when I travel. I've seen the scowls in every place I have visited with my gal and this has been affirmed by my ever watchful sweetheart. We have not visited GZ together yet, so maybe it is different there.

 

 

When you bring your wife to Eureka, Montana; will she also be "watched"?

 

Absolutely She will face the scowls of the racists in the community and the scrutiny of the 80+ Border Patrol officers in a community of 1000 people. One of my friends is a senior BP officer and I have asked him to help with introductions for Xiaoyuan when she arrives.

 

Griz, I haven't wanted to tell you this...but...last time I was in China I saw your photo hangin' in the China Post Office. What the heck did you do in China back in '78, buddy???

 

I had a big ol' laugh when pkfops asked you about your lil' lady being watched in Montana...I hope you did too.

 

tsap seui

Don't forget the milk bottle carton pictures and the ADVO ads asking have you seen us?

[Dennis143]

My first trip I noticed lots of people watching me. I being a woman and not being Chinese. My sister went with me and we are both tall and bigger than Chinese woman. Women, children and especially men would stare. It wasn't a big deal, we were different. I had a child on the subway reach up and feel my hair, she just smiled and I smiled back. Her mother scolded her and I told her it was okay. One man was riding a motorcycle and wrecked it because he was staring at both my sister and I. When your different people are curious is all.

Now that's a great story. We don't often get to read about experiences of American women in China. I can imagine all the heads two women would turn. Funny thing is, I know that there is no exaggeration in your post.

 

Thanks for sharing.

[rogerluli]

My first trip I noticed lots of people watching me. I being a woman and not being Chinese. My sister went with me and we are both tall and bigger than Chinese woman. Women, children and especially men would stare. It wasn't a big deal, we were different. I had a child on the subway reach up and feel my hair, she just smiled and I smiled back. Her mother scolded her and I told her it was okay. One man was riding a motorcycle and wrecked it because he was staring at both my sister and I. When your different people are curious is all.

Now that's a great story. We don't often get to read about experiences of American women in China. I can imagine all the heads two women would turn. Funny thing is, I know that there is no exaggeration in your post.

 

Thanks for sharing.

 

It is much more rare to see foreign women without men in China...Too bad you didn't get a video of the guy crashing his bike...

[lostinblue]

A friend of mine worked at an international school in Tianjin. She is black from South Africa. Everyone wanted to touch her daughters hair. Everytime they went on the street they had a crowd around them

Edited February 16, 2008 by lostinblue (see edit history)

[griz326]

Griz, I'm not takin' you comment personal....

 

"It's good to know that at least one other person here doesn't feed on happy horse manure."

 

And I fully agree that some have on some very rose tinted glasses while in China.

 

It was not a comment intended specifically for you.

 

 

Negativity only gets to a person, when, THEY let it.

 

I like ya Griz, and I say with a smile on my face, if you feel, and are concentrating on the fact that you're gettin' negativity from the Chinese people, then it's your own fault.

 

Agreed. I've traveled the world; dirty looks do not trouble me.

 

People are capable of generating their own misfortune - I saw a number of my shipmates do it in one port to the next. As a blue water merchant seaman (4+ years at sea), watching expressions and body language when in port allowed me to avoid bad situations without physical conflict a number of times.

 

In the case of this post, the dirty looks - scowls - were simply reported as facts of life.

 

Had my gal reacted to the scowls badly, we would have withdrawn to friendlier locations. She took them in stride; so did I - but I certainly did not erase them from my memory.

[griz326]

Ignorance is bliss, Roger.

 

Yes. I agree.

 

Does this mean that you've taken off your rose-colored glasses?