Did you have a Chinese Traditional Wedding?

[pkfops]

I had consulted with a Chinese lawyer on this, yes, as long as you don't register the wedding, your still on a K1.

 

Tim

 

 

>>>We are not going through the K3 process, we will have the Symbolic wedding for her and family there in China.

 

Maybe I worry too much...but might that "symbolic" wedding actually be viewed as the real deal - forcing you to switch to a K3?

 

Steve ... the key is the visit to the government office, registration of marriage, and the infamous "red book" ... that's what the governments of China and the US regard as marriage in China.

 

Even at our "wedding" (engagement) dinner I gave a little speech about how I will take care of Lao Po and she did likewise. It's things like that that constitute what Tim is referring to as a symbolic wedding. As long as he doesn't register a marriage with the Chinese government he's OK.

 

And any such photos must never be submitted as they will be used aginst you.

Edited December 18, 2007 by pkfops (see edit history)

[Shenzhen K-1]

I had consulted with a Chinese lawyer on this, yes, as long as you don't register the wedding, your still on a K1.

 

Tim

 

 

>>>We are not going through the K3 process, we will have the Symbolic wedding for her and family there in China.

 

Maybe I worry too much...but might that "symbolic" wedding actually be viewed as the real deal - forcing you to switch to a K3?

 

Steve ... the key is the visit to the government office, registration of marriage, and the infamous "red book" ... that's what the governments of China and the US regard as marriage in China.

 

Even at our "wedding" (engagement) dinner I gave a little speech about how I will take care of Lao Po and she did likewise. It's things like that that constitute what Tim is referring to as a symbolic wedding. As long as he doesn't register a marriage with the Chinese government he's OK.

 

And any such photos must never be submitted as they will be used aginst you.

 

You just aen't right..........funny as all get out, but not right!!

 

And also, Merry

[hakkamike]

if I rememer right this same topic came up around 3 years ago Nothing has changed..

[Shenzhen K-1]

if I rememer right this same topic came up around 3 years ago Nothing has changed..

 

Well after some of the posts on this subject.......three years later they still owe on it!!

[yaya44]

Our "traditionally modern" unofficial, but real wedding costs:

 

Engagement pics: 8000rmb

Dower money to her parents: 99999rmb

Chartered bus for foreign / non local guests to her hometown: 7500rmb

Hotel fare for foreign / non local guests: 12000rmb

Restaurant: 50000rmb

Alcohol/drinks: 25000rmb

Favors: 2500rmb

Entertainment: 10000rmb

Pictures/video: 5000rmb

Cars: 5000rmb

 

In a nutshell, a lot of our costs incurred because we wanted as many of our friends and family (from usa and china) to come, thus required us to charter a bus. There we had the traditional reception annointing us husband and wife proceeded by the customary chinese "newlywed" hazing at her house (never understood why its done after and not before the wedding). We had a relatively small wedding by most standards (300-400), and all of it had to be paid by me (minimal money in red envelopes). I think overall, its probably 50 percent cheaper then th usa.

[MikeandRong]

If we decide we will proceed further, then we will make plans to see her family in Harbin. I think around the April / May timeframe but who knows. lucky dates for us to marry have not been determined yet.

 

If you go to Harbin on this forst trip, dress warm. It will be a high of -10 days and -25 nights (F not C).

 

If you decide to do the photo shoot up in the Harbin area, PM me, I will set you up with the family photo shop.

[pkfops]

Our "traditionally modern" unofficial, but real wedding costs:

 

Engagement pics: 8000rmb

Dower money to her parents: 99999rmb

Chartered bus for foreign / non local guests to her hometown: 7500rmb

Hotel fare for foreign / non local guests: 12000rmb

Restaurant: 50000rmb

Alcohol/drinks: 25000rmb

Favors: 2500rmb

Entertainment: 10000rmb

Pictures/video: 5000rmb

Cars: 5000rmb

 

In a nutshell, a lot of our costs incurred because we wanted as many of our friends and family (from usa and china) to come, thus required us to charter a bus. There we had the traditional reception annointing us husband and wife proceeded by the customary chinese "newlywed" hazing at her house (never understood why its done after and not before the wedding). We had a relatively small wedding by most standards (300-400), and all of it had to be paid by me (minimal money in red envelopes). I think overall, its probably 50 percent cheaper then th usa.

 

Right on Topic!

[yuehan123]

I recall covering this in detail after our wedding 'reception' last year. Unfortunately, I'm too lazy to look for that thread.

 

How much you spend depends a great deal on how much you got. Cash talks, credit cards are only a little useful.

 

Wedding itself- no clue, we got married in USA, at the court house, after k-1 complete.

 

Wedding reception- whole different story. We returned one year later and let her Dad handle the invitations. We also paid the far away (and, poor) family travel and lodging expenses. Agree that between the red envelopes and the tea ceremony gifts, your actual reception expenses will likely be covered. We had 10 tables, 10 people each table- cost about 10,000 rmb. But, wife's family knew the Hotel manager and his father.

 

However, you also need to supply the cigarettes, candy, nuts, treats, booze and fruit juice. You like Boone's Farm or Brand X famous brandy?

 

Your wedding photos? As with everything in life you get what you pay for. We are very pleased after choosing 'a lot' of photos. Dowry? Not us. Gold gifts? Not a chance!

[Shenzhen K-1]

Our "traditionally modern" unofficial, but real wedding costs:

 

Engagement pics: 8000rmb

Dower money to her parents: 99999rmb

Chartered bus for foreign / non local guests to her hometown: 7500rmb

Hotel fare for foreign / non local guests: 12000rmb

Restaurant: 50000rmb

Alcohol/drinks: 25000rmb

Favors: 2500rmb

Entertainment: 10000rmb

Pictures/video: 5000rmb

Cars: 5000rmb

 

In a nutshell, a lot of our costs incurred because we wanted as many of our friends and family (from usa and china) to come, thus required us to charter a bus. There we had the traditional reception annointing us husband and wife proceeded by the customary chinese "newlywed" hazing at her house (never understood why its done after and not before the wedding). We had a relatively small wedding by most standards (300-400), and all of it had to be paid by me (minimal money in red envelopes). I think overall, its probably 50 percent cheaper then th usa.

 

That is one nice wedding, not going to spend 1/2 that much here!! I did the dowry thing but not nearly that much, WOW!!

[SheLikesME?]

The whole family certainly considered us to be married after this banquet. Our daughter shifted from calling me "uncle" to "dad" at that point. It's a little hard to appreciate this with our western backgrounds but to Lao Po's family this was as solid as being married by the Pope.

Interestng story Jim and certainly done right for the family. a bit off topic, but I can't help but feel like it is always OK to play by the different rules when in China. It just feels like another world. To the family you are married. I want to expand my thoughts but this isn't the thread for it.

 

We did the registration, but had a reception in Benxi for those who could come. Wife did not want to spend too much and did not want me to have to pay her parents anything, since she felt like a modern woman in Beijing, but tradition tugged on her. Will meet her father if he gets visa next month.

[sleepless in Houston&CQ]

Emma and I had a REAL Chinese wedding in China and it was cool.

 

We went and picked up the RED BOOK in ChongQing and then took a

flight to Shanghai. For the wedding which was held the following day.

 

The cost depends on how deep your pockets are?

I'm not sure the total cost as Auntie and Uncle paid for some stuff.

Emma's old college class mates paid some stuff and with those RED Envelopes,

I'm almost sure covered the rest of the bill

Edited December 20, 2007 by sleepless in Houston&CQ (see edit history)

[izus]

our lawyer for our K1 warned us about marrying in China.

to be sure nothing was documented. so we decided against any actuall ceramony

 

we had our pictures in GZ during interview trip.

everyone in US thought i was married there because they looked so real.

 

she had a wedding shower (i dont think they call it that) before she left,

we got real lucky cause both her parents and sisters all were able to attend our wedding in miami.

[mchina34]

Just the straight poop. If you had a traditional wedding in China, and you foot the bill, what was the tally? What did that include?

 

It seems my lady wants to go all out, including gold presents for family. If you would rather not disclose financial details here, PM me please.

 

Tim

 

 

i did, and it was one of the best experiences of my life. no joke. we had a fairly large one with over 100 guests at a nice hotel. it was great...and compared to an american wedding, cheaper and much more fun. make sure you record it...and practice your talent skills. it's common for the groom to have to 'earn' her from the mob ;-}

 

dowries vary per family and per region, but don't get suckered. if you feel you are, then chances are they're not being very family-like. your american, so they might expect more. but in general, the husband pays for all wedding epxenses, the ring, the housing, and provides the family with a dowry (cash normally as i know it). the wife's side also can/does provide a dowry, normally in the furnishing of the home. kind of like american style gifts at a wedding, eg, toaster, microwave, bedding stuff, etc.

 

also, i've heard that sometimes it's a test to see how much the guy thinks his wife is worth, but in the end they don't really require the extravagant dowry. again, depends on the family, but from several i've heard that's the norm.

[ameriken]

Did you have a Chinese Traditional Wedding? No. We did a civil ceremony on the cheap after she got here on her K-1.

 

After getting her visa we spent one night in Shanghai with family before flying to the US. They took us out for food and her brother and brothers-in-law to get me drunk.

I'm with Don on this, we did a civil ceremony in Vegas, utilizing their own marriage commissioner to do the ceremony.

 

However we do intend to go back to Shanghai sometime in the not so distant future to have a simple ceremony for her family and friends. When? Not determined yet, if not this year, next year for sure.