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Did you ever just sit and wonder?


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I guess this would be relative to those of us who don't have our SO's with us and those of us who live alone, or anyone who can relate to this. Have you ever come home at night with not a lot to do, and you sit down at the computer. You get on CFL and you start reading the various posts and problems. You read about those who have good news. You read about those who are having a rough time. You have compassion for everyone and, sometimes, you respond, sometimes you just read other people's posts. You start thinking about your SO and how far away she is. You think of how much you love her and wish like hell that she was sitting on your knee. You think and you wonder, "how long will this take?" Will this ever, ever, EVER end? You've told your relatives and close friends about what you're doing. When you see them, they ask, "hey, how's that visa coming along?" or something along those lines. You tell them, "well, I'm still waiting for my application to get from point A to point B or whatever. You know that some of them thought you were crazy to start with. But, you can't be concerned with how "they" feel. Every night, you come home, you check your email, you check CFL, you check USCIS, you check GUZ, you check everything that is possible to check, and -- no change. You get through to the next day. You check again. You wait -- no change. A week goes by, two weeks go by, three weeks, you check -- no change. You keep reading CFL. You read about guys like Rick and his SO Yanlan and what a hell of a time he's having. You feel bad for him. You want to help. But, your case is what's important to you. You wait-- a few more days --- no change. You keep telling your friends "sorry, nothing to report, no change." You just sit, night after night, and you wonder, "what in hell am I doing?" Then you think about your lady and it gives you strength to move on to the next night, and the next, and the next . . .

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Every Night,

 

Every Day.

 

On a good day I do planning sometimes I will shop for her. Like today, I bought 20 of those foo-foo padded hangers women like to put their clothes on. Awhile back I bought a bunch of pink plastic hangers for our daughter's closet.

 

Empty closet

 

I have new bedding she bought and I brought back, pillows, sheets, covers. I keep them ready, I won't use them until she is here.

 

Empty bed

 

Her clothes almost fill a huge dresser, but their owner is nowhere to be found in this home. Nor is the owner of numerous toys and such that sit on a floor in a room with pink curtains.

 

Empty home

 

The brief time comes when we can talk on Yahoo and/or telephone during the evening. I can see her.

 

Then... Nothing

 

Empty Life

 

Staring at the TV, I don't even know what I'm watching; waiting to become so exhausted that sleeping will happen... then work.

 

This is the pathetic excuse I call "A Life" for over 15 months.

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Are you thinking again?

 

Well, before I met you guys I came up with this really great idea. Why not find a nice Chinese girl, hmmm. I knew the kind of person I was looking for so I did. Then I come to find out that it is difficult and there are all these people with my idea! In fact I found out that I was not even close!

 

Things should not be this tough or ridiculous. I'm sure criminals go about other methods than these to get in.

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I guess this would be relative to those of us who don't have our SO's with us and those of us who live alone, or anyone who can relate to this.  Have you ever come home at night with not a lot to do, and you sit down at the computer.  You get on CFL and you start reading the various posts and problems.  You read about those who have good news.  You read about those who are having a rough time.  You have compassion for everyone and, sometimes, you respond, sometimes you just read other people's posts.  You start thinking about your SO and how far away she is.  You think of how much you love her and wish like hell that she was sitting on your knee.  You think and you wonder, "how long will this take?"  Will this ever, ever, EVER end?  You've told your relatives and close friends about what you're doing.  When you see them, they ask, "hey, how's that visa coming along?" or something along those lines.  You tell them, "well, I'm still waiting for my application to get from point A to point B or whatever. You know that some of them thought you were crazy to start with.  But, you can't be concerned with how "they" feel.  Every night, you come home, you check your email, you check CFL, you check USCIS, you check GUZ, you check everything that is possible to check, and -- no change.  You get through to the next day.  You check again.  You wait -- no change.  A week goes by,  two weeks go by, three weeks, you check -- no change.  You keep reading CFL.  You read about guys like Rick and his SO Yanlan and what a hell of a time he's having.  You feel bad for him.  You want to help.  But, your case is what's important to you.  You wait-- a few more days --- no change.  You keep telling your friends  "sorry, nothing to report, no change."  You just sit, night after night, and you wonder,  "what in hell am I doing?"  Then you think about your lady and it gives you strength to move on to the next night, and the next, and the next .  .  .

208785[/snapback]

I would swear you've been reading my mind. Amazing how all of us that are waiting for our SO's think about the exact same things. The not knowing is what is the killer. Then I read about what rick is going through and I become scared chitless. To finally get to the point of having an interview and then have everything fall apart because of some hard nosed VO.

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Great post guys.....do you ever find yourselves talking to her pictures too.... :P  and you can imagine her talking back.  Then ya laugh at yourself and say some day....some day!

208810[/snapback]

Now Richard, that is just wacky. :P And....the picture talks back? :whistling:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(you know I'm just teasing you, ole buddy. :lol: )

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Great post guys.....do you ever find yourselves talking to her pictures too.... :P   and you can imagine her talking back.  Then ya laugh at yourself and say some day....some day!

208810[/snapback]

Now Richard, that is just wacky. :P And....the picture talks back? :whistling:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(you know I'm just teasing you, ole buddy. :lol: )

208818[/snapback]

Yo Dennis...what ever it takes to get ya through, right?...hehe

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I have new bedding she bought and I brought back, pillows, sheets, covers.  I keep them ready, I won't use them until she is here.

 

208795[/snapback]

Silly you..... those sheets were made for a mattress without padding (the notorious upholstered rock). They will never work on an American mattress. LOL :P :lol:

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Great post guys.....do you ever find yourselves talking to her pictures too.... :lol:  and you can imagine her talking back.  Then ya laugh at yourself and say some day....some day!

208810[/snapback]

yes. I talk to her for a few hours each morning, and then at her pictures now and then throughout the day because the house has photos of her all over the place.

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Guest ShaQuaNew
*You get on CFL and you start reading the various posts and problems.

*You read about those who have good news.

*You read about those who are having a rough time.

*You have compassion for everyone and, sometimes, you respond

*sometimes you just read other people's posts.

*You start thinking about your SO and how far away she is.

*You think of how much you love her and wish like hell that she was sitting on your knee.

*You think and you wonder, "how long will this take?"

 

*Will this ever, ever, EVER end?

208785[/snapback]

Yes, I do.... ;)

Edited by ShaQuaNew (see edit history)
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Great post guys.....do you ever find yourselves talking to her pictures too.... :happybday:0„2  and you can imagine her talking back.0„2 Then ya laugh at yourself and say some day....some day!

208810[/snapback]

yes. I talk to her for a few hours each morning, and then at her pictures now and then throughout the day because the house has photos of her all over the place.

208860[/snapback]

Yes, I do the exact same thing. We talk on the web cam 2 times a day, and the phone at least 1 time, and it still is not enough :o .

 

We have more pictures than I can even count. The best are the life size ones of us together we had made by her friend for us. They are printed on silk, and hang on the wall. These are hanging on the walls in the bedrooms of each of us, and look soooo real. We just finished talking, and I miss her already.

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What kills me is when Jie asks, " How long ? "

 

As I look at it going forward it appears it will never end, but when I look at the time that has elapsed since meeting her, it seems like yesterday.

I think about her every waking moment, and have gone through being unproductive at work, school, and home. Now I feel Okay, but deep down it still tears at me.

 

" LOVE and WAR "

 

In love with Jie, but at war with my emotions. Deep down I feel that all of this will pay off big time. The waiting only strengthens our love. I see it as the " tear down period ", after this we will rebuild our life together.

 

I also think of it as;

 

We met, we were merely caterpillars.

We wait, we are in the cocoon.

Then the day comes, we become butterflies.

 

Then the " training " begins, Reality sets in, and......................

 

Looking at the status on the hour/daily only adds wood to the fire of my insanity. I try not to.

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