ameriken Posted November 7, 2005 Report Share Posted November 7, 2005 My SO had an interesting question........for about 4 months she has been using as an MSN messenger name "Wo ai lao gong", and we both use the terms lao po and lao gong very freely, although we are not gotten married. She changed it after my first visit to see her when I asked her to marry me. Almost all of our 'evidence' include these terms. I have seen posts where the K1 visa was not given at the interview because the VO got suspicious the couple was married. Could these terms lead the VO to think we are married, when we are not? Or do they accept this as common terminology even though a couple is not married? Thanks for any help ! Link to comment
Guest ShaQuaNew Posted November 7, 2005 Report Share Posted November 7, 2005 I have seen posts where the K1 visa was not given at the interview because the VO got suspicious the couple was married. Could these terms lead the VO to think we are married, when we are not? Or do they accept this as common terminology even though a couple is not married? Thanks for any help ! 166930[/snapback]Yes indeed. You must be very careful because what may seem innocent to you may well be viewed quite another way by a government official. Remember, a K1 visa permits one to come to the US and marry their fiance within 90-days. There are far too many however that conduct secret wedding ceremonies in China in an attempt to defraud the US government. The reasons for doing it seem harmless enough; and most do it because they want their SOs family and friends to participate. Other's have gotten into trouble showing wedding photos to a VO. They argue that they are only photos and they never married, but the seed is still planted. Yes, be careful.... Link to comment
ameriken Posted November 7, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2005 166930[/snapback]There are far too many however that conduct secret wedding ceremonies in China in an attempt to defraud the US government. 166932[/snapback]What I dont understand, is why do they ask for a 'single certificate' if they are going to suspect a marraige to begin with? The cert is a notarized govt doc. I dont get it! Link to comment
m-coon Posted November 7, 2005 Report Share Posted November 7, 2005 166930[/snapback]There are far too many however that conduct secret wedding ceremonies in China in an attempt to defraud the US government. 166932[/snapback]What I dont understand, is why do they ask for a 'single certificate' if they are going to suspect a marraige to begin with? The cert is a notarized govt doc. I dont get it!166949[/snapback]keep in mind that this "status of single" certificate is easily false! Anybody can claim they are single on this - it really is just your statement that you are single. I don't think it is verified. CFL members - please correct me if I am wrong. Link to comment
ameriken Posted November 7, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2005 (edited) 166930[/snapback] 166932[/snapback]What I dont understand, is why do they ask for a 'single certificate' if they are going to suspect a marraige to begin with? The cert is a notarized govt doc. I dont get it!166949[/snapback]keep in mind that this "status of single" certificate is easily false! Anybody can claim they are single on this - it really is just your statement that you are single. I don't think it is verified. CFL members - please correct me if I am wrong.166950[/snapback]She also got a cert from a govt office different from the notary office that stated that she had not been married since 2002. This is an official govt statement, and I think the govt has started keeping a computer database with legal records of marriages. So, she has both this and her own statement. So's may want to look into this Edited November 7, 2005 by ameriken (see edit history) Link to comment
philb Posted November 7, 2005 Report Share Posted November 7, 2005 Loose lips sink ships... I am also guilty of using Lao Po and Lao Gong; while we are definitely not married yet. I have heard mentioned here that this habit leads to a quick response when asked,"what is your Lao Gong's name?" OOops..I meant my Fiance NOT Husband. Off on the wrong foot with the VO. I must correct this and reflect the proper status also. Phil Link to comment
frank1538 Posted November 7, 2005 Report Share Posted November 7, 2005 I was advised against providing e-mails or other correspondence that contained these endearments. One would think the government would be smart enough to understand this cultural thing. Not. Link to comment
ameriken Posted November 7, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2005 (edited) I was advised against providing e-mails or other correspondence that contained these endearments. One would think the government would be smart enough to understand this cultural thing. Not. 166957[/snapback]Yes, these endearments should show that the two are a close couple, yet it actually can jeopardize the visa. In a way, such innocence leads to guilt. My SO said that in China, a plain ol' boyfriend/girlfriend can use the lao gong/po terminology. Yet, what matters is what the VO thinks. We have a 4 month period of using these terms very loosely and frequently, and is on all MSN Messenger talks (daily) and emails. Any suggestions what we shoudl do about this, if anything, when we present our evidence to support our relationship (and show that we are really not married)??? Edited November 8, 2005 by ameriken (see edit history) Link to comment
IluvmyLi Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 Li and I also have used the term "husband" and "wife". I will make sure to avoid printing out these emails. Better safe then sorry. Link to comment
Randy W Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 I was advised against providing e-mails or other correspondence that contained these endearments.?One would think the government would be smart enough to understand this cultural thing.?Not. 166957[/snapback]Yes, these endearments should show that the two are a close couple, yet it actually can jeopardize the visa. In a way, such innocence leads to guilt. My SO said that in China, a plain ol' boyfriend/girlfriend can use the lao gong/po terminology. Yet, what matters is what the VO thinks. We have a 4 month period of using these terms very loosely and frequently, and is on all MSN Messenger talks (daily) and emails. Any suggestions what we shoudl do about this, if anything, when we present our evidence to support our relationship (and show that we are really not married)??? 166959[/snapback] If you want to go to this trouble, it is permissible to use a marker to cover personal topics. I think these names would certainly qualify. Link to comment
HanLi Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 Whew!! Glad I'm CR-1....... but I used those terms too prior to the marriage..... silly??? Link to comment
Meidon Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 I am really surprised & worried that GUZ would make a point to not like the fact that we call our SO's Laopoo and Laogong. Me an my SO have used it and we will continue to use it but this is a concern of mine. if this is in our chats for our interview what should we do cross our fingers? Link to comment
david_dawei Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 I'm not convinced that these particular names showing up in emails are going to cause a VO to deny someone.. They probably do 100s of interviews a month and seems impossible that they would be unaware of its usage among the culture, whether married or not... Link to comment
ameriken Posted November 8, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 (edited) I am really surprised & worried that GUZ would make a point to not like the fact that we call our SO's Laopoo and Laogong. Me an my SO have used it and we will continue to use it but this is a concern of mine. if this is in our chats for our interview what should we do cross our fingers? 167033[/snapback]I just discussed this with my lao........oops, fiance, and we decided that we know our love for each other, and it is better that we do not do anything to cause delay at the interview. We know we are not married, but GZ does not, so we will keep the LP/LG out of our talk, both written and verbal. The VO's are known to ask questions using the term "your Lao gong" or "your husband", and if the SO does not counter and say we are not married, he is my fiance, then it could raise suspiciion. Edited November 8, 2005 by ameriken (see edit history) Link to comment
jim_julian Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 This is a little hard to understand. Most couples in love in China adopt the Lao P- Lao Gong terminology. My Lao Po was very sensitive about this. When I sat with Mama, Baba, and her daughter and asked Baba's permission to marry then it was OK to call each other that in front of the family. Surely the VO's cannot be so disconnected from Chinese culture not to understand that! Link to comment
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