Married in China?

[skibum]

We never discussed getting married in China and the thought never occured to me. I just assumed that we would take the three months on the visa to see if she liked it here. As it turned out, we got married the day after she got here!

But, what makes you want to get married in China?

[msmckee]

We didn't get married in China, but I can think of one advantage. You can avoid the possibility of a shakedown if you want to travel and stay in the same room. Or just avoid the threat in general, travel or not.

[hakkamike]

We never discussed getting married in China and the thought never occured to me.  I just assumed that we would take the three months on the visa to see if she liked it here. As it turned out, we got married the day after she got here!

But, what makes you want to get married in China?

164081[/snapback]

There has been a lot of dissusion on this.

 

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=8144&hl=

 

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=3629&hl=

 

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?...topic=10327&hl=

 

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=9980&hl=

[izus]

We didn't get married in China, but I can think of one advantage.  You can avoid the possibility of a shakedown if you want to travel and stay in the same room.  Or just avoid the threat in general, travel or not.

164086[/snapback]

what do you mean shake down?

[jbray]

I got married in China so that her family could come to the wedding. Also, we were ready to get married, but weren't able to go to the US (because of the visa) for another year... It's a lot cheaper! I think we paid $400 for the whole thing (we took 80 people to an all-you-can-eat hotpot place... Yeah, classy!).

[msmckee]

what do you mean shake down?

164099[/snapback]

It might not be advisable to share a room with a woman in China that you are not married to, even in her own home. You may find your self contributing to the local precinct beer fund... or worse. Think about a police record. I know most have never had a problem, but it was a risk I would not (did not) take. We had separate rooms in GZ when Yue interviewed. Some hotelers might not even give you a room without proof of marraige, or an equivalent guarantee

 

We recently went to Atlanta for a couple of days. After we checked into the hotel Yue quietly asked, "we don't need to show marry?" I'm thinking of a 1930's movie with Clark Gable

Edited October 28, 2005 by msmckee (see edit history)

[HanLi]

it was something we wanted to do... is that strange?

[jim_julian]

  After we checked into the hotel Yue quietly asked, "we don't need to show marry?"  I'm thinking of a 1930's movie with Clark Gable 

164151[/snapback]

She sounds like a very sweet lady ... good heart.

 

I do worry about staying in the apartment in CK. Neighbors could make trouble. Maybe it helps that Mama and Baba live there too.

[tywy_99]

Getting married in China was a time I'll never forget! An adventure almost beyond words.

Looking back on it now, I wouldn't have had it any other way!

 

Our wedding anniversary is 2 weeks away! Married for 3 wonderful years!...

[Darlene2005]

It's up to you and your so if you get married in China.

[Yuanyang]

I'm very proud to have my Chinese Marriage certificate with me!

 

We married in China because that's what she felt most comfortable doing. She knew that it would take longer but the family seemed very happy that we married there.

[Robert S.]

She insisted. Then much later she said she was afraid she might lose me otherwise. That was a sweet pill for my ego and I ate it up. Ping has promised me that when we go back to Dalian we can go and say hello to the lady who works in the Office For Chinese People Marrying Someone From Another Country. I loved her little speech she gave which ended in "and we hope you stay married forever."

[mercator]

She insisted.  Then much later she said she was afraid she might lose me otherwise.  That was a sweet pill for my ego and I ate it up.  Ping has promised me that when we go back to Dalian we can go and say hello to the lady who works in the Office For Chinese People Marrying Someone From Another Country.  I loved her little speech she gave which ended in "and we hope you stay married forever."

164324[/snapback]

Many factors, really...

 

One, we were ready. That was probably the main factor.

 

Second, her family is extremely traditional, so the thought of her coming to the US and staying with me in my home was basically unacceptable. Further, she was also worried that she would lose me or that she would come over and I would change my mind. I think 'saving face' is bound up in there as well.

 

Third, so she could marry and have the celebration with her family. My family is pretty casual, so it seemed the wise thing to do.

 

No regrets. Maybe it will take longer for the K-3 and maybe it won't. It defies logic why a K-1 should be faster than a K-3, unless they some how rationalize that there is more risk of cham marriages when you marry in China than in the US.

 

Anyway, I wouldn't have done it any other way, except maybe winning the lottery and living with her there and touring the country until a DCF visa went through! (lol).

 

merc

[Guest Gene]

I wanted to get married in China to give her and her family a commitment from me. I figured it was the least I could do considering the commitment she was giving me.

[skibum]

Thanks for all the answers. I guess I always assumed that the 3 month period of the visa was a good thing. I still think it is a good idea to allow the SO to she if she likes her new living conditions and community. But, like I said, we did not take advantage of it anyway.

Her parents are pretty laid back and never said anything about us getting married there.

Anyway- alls well that ends well - hope these love stories never end!