wedding issues

[Homeprincess]

Hi,guys, does someone know how much a wedding can cost in the states? My parents wanna know this since we know in America it is bride's family to pay all the wedding expenses so they wanna make sure about the amount. None of my and my fiance's parents are very rich people in China or in the states. But they want to try their best to hold a meaningful and memorable wedding for us. So, thanks for the advice.

 

BTW, does American government offer "honeymoon vacations" for employees as Chinese government does?

 

Sorry if this topic is off-track a little bit.

[xulei601]

My wedding is just in the planning stages, but I've learned a few things.

 

Most importantly, a little creativity and simplicity can keep costs down. I think one of the most expensive aspects is the venue. Don't know what churches cost, but I looked around at scenic wineries. The average cost there for a 3 hour ceremony/reception was $3000. Other options needed to be explored, and we decided on a restored Victorian-style hotel in my hometown (a small town). To rent the lobby for all afternoon and evening was only $75! To also rent every room in the hotel for guests to stay would cost under $2000.

 

A lot of money is spent if the bride and groom have attendants - best man, groomsmen, bridesmaids, maid of honor, ushers. In that case you are expected to pay for the dresses and tuxes, and maybe even their accomodations, and a gift for each. We are going quite simple with just a best man and bridesmaid. Simple, but I think it might add a little to the intimacy of the gathering.

 

Finally, you can save a lot of money buy taking care of a few things in China. Just yesterday we went shopping for rings and a wedding dress. I figure we paid less than half of what we would have in America.

 

You can definitely have a meaningful wedding while keeping costs down.

 

Good luck.

[Steve and Qingqing]

Cost is really up to you...You can have a small simple wedding at the Justice of the Peace for 150.00 or a huge wedding with everything for 10 million.. Average price for a small chapel wedding is probably 1500.00....I know a friends small wedding with one hundred guests at a old victorian house cost him 1600.00 do a search on google for wedding chapels and the state your planning on having it in... Las Vegas offers packages from 125.00 to ??????? I saw some for 8,000 as well.....My situation is I dont expect either parents to pay for the wedding...tradition or not... My SO only request is that we have flowers.... If you plan a huge wedding, catered with lots of food and liquor and flowers, then 15,000.00 is realistic..

Edited September 1, 2005 by Steve and Qingqing (see edit history)

[Guest ShaQuaNew]

Wow, what a question.

 

Let's just say from $100.00 or less depending upon the price of the marriage license and cost to notarize it up to:

 

$100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.00

 

I hope this helps

[Homeprincess]

You can definitely have a meaningful wedding while keeping costs down.

 

Good luck.

151658[/snapback]

Thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts.

 

Are there any website I can learn more in details about the procedures? I used to attend one of my American friends' wedding and she told me the flowers alone cost $5,000.

 

My mom was told by her friend who live in the states to prepare around 30,000 to 40,000 for a "common" wedding in the states. Somehow I feel sorry for my parents since they even have to afford my tuition fee at graduate school later on. Besides, in China it is taken for granted that groom's family takes care of everything from the wedding ceremony to the first big downpayment of an apartment. So is around 30,000 usd necessary for a wedding in New Jersey following the normal procedures?

 

In other words, what's the reasonable budget for a typical and simple wedding in NJ?

[Randy W]

BTW, does American government offer "honeymoon vacations" for employees as Chinese government does?

151657[/snapback]

 

 

Employess are allowed 2 weeks or more vacation time every year. Some employers will allow you to borrow vacation time from next year for a special purpose like a honeymoon.

 

I know that with my employer, though, I'd be working Saturdays into next year to make up the time, since I've already spent 2 weeks in China and 1 in Washington.

 

No flowers, wedding cake, best man, etc. are necessary. Minimum costs are for the wedding license, and minister, depending on what you want. Some will marry you for free.

Edited September 1, 2005 by Randy W (see edit history)

[Homeprincess]

BTW, does American government offer "honeymoon vacations" for employees as Chinese government does?

151657[/snapback]

 

 

Employess are allowed 2 weeks or more vacation time every year. Some employers will allow you to borrow vacation time from next year for a special purpose like a honeymoon.

 

I know that with my employer, though, I'd be working Saturdays into next year to make up the time, since I've already spent 2 weeks in China and 1 in Washington.

 

No flowers, wedding cake, best man, etc. are necessary. Minimum costs are for the wedding license, and minister, depending on what you want. Some will marry you for free.

151668[/snapback]

Too bad there is no honeymoon vacations...in China, if one gets married after 25 years old, one can have up to 40 days' vacation and this is stipulated by law...

[Guest ShaQuaNew]

Thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts.

 

Are there any website I can learn more in details about the procedures? I used to attend one of my American friends' wedding and she told me the flowers alone cost $5,000.

 

My mom was told by her friend who live in the states to prepare around 30,000 to 40,000 for a "common" wedding in the states. Somehow I feel sorry for my parents since they even have to afford my tuition fee at graduate school later on. Besides, in China it is taken for granted that  groom's family takes care of everything from the wedding ceremony to the first big downpayment of an apartment. So is around 30,000 usd necessary for a wedding in New Jersey following the normal procedures?

 

In other words, what's the reasonable budget for a typical and simple wedding in NJ?

151667[/snapback]

I suggest you go to your nearest book or large drugstore and take yourself to the magazine section. There you will find a plethera of magazines for brides and weddings. Major consensus regarding weddings............I don't know if there is one. All limits are contained within the confines of your pocketbook and what you want. Do yourself a favor and DON'T do anything that you can't pay for. If you don't have the cash now to pay for it, don't do it.

[LeeFisher3]

You can definitely have a meaningful wedding while keeping costs down.

 

Good luck.

151658[/snapback]

Thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts.

 

Are there any website I can learn more in details about the procedures? I used to attend one of my American friends' wedding and she told me the flowers alone cost $5,000.

 

My mom was told by her friend who live in the states to prepare around 30,000 to 40,000 for a "common" wedding in the states. Somehow I feel sorry for my parents since they even have to afford my tuition fee at graduate school later on. Besides, in China it is taken for granted that groom's family takes care of everything from the wedding ceremony to the first big downpayment of an apartment. So is around 30,000 usd necessary for a wedding in New Jersey following the normal procedures?

 

In other words, what's the reasonable budget for a typical and simple wedding in NJ?

151667[/snapback]

You should discuss your wedding plans with your SO to decide the type of wedding you would have. Do not be influenced in this by others who would suggest you must have a very large wedding. This day needs to be special for the two of you. Often a small wedding is much more meaningful to the couple, large weddings are often very stressful and the exchange of vows becomes overshadowed by the management of such a large event. Some weddings seem to be more concerned with impressing other people than celebrating the love between two people.

 

We will have a small wedding with only family and a few friends to share the exchange of the wedding vows. The wedding will possibly be in our home and not be very expensive. We desire to have a video made to share with family and I believe this will be our largest expense. I expect this to cost us about $500 dollars including flowers.

 

We will have a Chinese Wedding Banquet as a celebration and I do not wish to think of the cost to do this in the US, I would estimate we will spend $1000 for this with 20-30 guests.

 

I would not wish for my SO's family to feel bound by American tradition and culture concerning the wedding.

 

In the US each person has vacation time as part of their employment compensation, but nothing is required.

[Guest ShaQuaNew]

You should discuss your wedding plans with your SO to decide the type of wedding you would have. Do not be influenced in this by others who would suggest you must have a very large wedding.

151686[/snapback]

I always found the safest place to be was out of the way and let her decide. Sounds great. Good idea honey. You bet. I'm still practicing my mop-slap ducking routine tho....

[izus]

You can definitely have a meaningful wedding while keeping costs down.

 

Good luck.

151658[/snapback]

Thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts.

 

Are there any website I can learn more in details about the procedures? I used to attend one of my American friends' wedding and she told me the flowers alone cost $5,000.

 

My mom was told by her friend who live in the states to prepare around 30,000 to 40,000 for a "common" wedding in the states. Somehow I feel sorry for my parents since they even have to afford my tuition fee at graduate school later on. Besides, in China it is taken for granted that groom's family takes care of everything from the wedding ceremony to the first big downpayment of an apartment. So is around 30,000 usd necessary for a wedding in New Jersey following the normal procedures?

 

In other words, what's the reasonable budget for a typical and simple wedding in NJ?

151667[/snapback]

You should discuss your wedding plans with your SO to decide the type of wedding you would have. Do not be influenced in this by others who would suggest you must have a very large wedding. This day needs to be special for the two of you. Often a small wedding is much more meaningful to the couple, large weddings are often very stressful and the exchange of vows becomes overshadowed by the management of such a large event. Some weddings seem to be more concerned with impressing other people than celebrating the love between two people.

 

We will have a small wedding with only family and a few friends to share the exchange of the wedding vows. The wedding will possibly be in our home and not be very expensive. We desire to have a video made to share with family and I believe this will be our largest expense. I expect this to cost us about $500 dollars including flowers.

 

We will have a Chinese Wedding Banquet as a celebration and I do not wish to think of the cost to do this in the US, I would estimate we will spend $1000 for this with 20-30 guests.

 

I would not wish for my SO's family to feel bound by American tradition and culture concerning the wedding.

 

In the US each person has vacation time as part of their employment compensation, but nothing is required.

151686[/snapback]

without a doubt the best advice is to consult the little woman.

i told Chun that i was going to leave it up to her. she immeadiatly contacted my sister and started planning.

i dont know if thats such a good idea or not now

my sister told me i would need a second job when she got finished

[shyaushu]

The essence of a wedding is the public joining of two people as lovers and partners. So, the important part is the level and nature of the committment between the two people.

 

I'd "spend" more on that part than on the ceremony and celebration.

 

A simple civil ceremony joining two people hugely in love and committed to their shared destiny is a far better "wedding" than an elaborate (and expensive) loveless union.

 

My first (deceased) wife was from NJ, and our wedding, in her parent's backyard, and with a small army of friends and extended family attending (she was from Haiti) probably cost around $3,000 - $5,000 (her parents paid for it).

 

My wedding with Zhenshu was about like applying for a driver's license in the US -- simply signing some documents and affirming we were not related by blood! -- yet it was emotionally overwhelming. The "wedding celebration" a few days later in Shenzhen, with about 40 friends and relatives eating and drinking as much as they cared to in a private room in a nice "fan guar" cost us about $350 US.

 

My memories of the two are equally wonderful, and have nothing to do with the amount of money we spent.

[xulei601]

Have you sat down with your fiance and really discussed payment? Traditions are just traditions - nothing says weddings have to be conducted a certain way, including the payment. Frankly, I'm a little surprised that, given the economic differences between USA and PRC, that all the financial burden is being put on your family. Maybe you could split the cost, and then you wouldn't have to cut as many corners and could have all the flowers you want!

[pkfops]

Check this site out:

 

http://www.harveystahoeweddings.com/

 

[ptcrusier333rph]

btw the fact the bride parents pay everything has pretty much went out the door in today america, both parties anymore been sharing the bill.

 

as for wedding even a back yard wedding can be beautiful and free on location.

 

Robert