What bothers you the most...

[awch]

I've lived in China for over 2 years. When I first came I would have listed stuff like trash and staring as the things I don't like the most. But the things that have affected me the most long term are different.

 

I would say the top 4 are:

 

Air pollution- even though Dalian is considered one of the cleanest cities in China, I have had a constant cough and sneezing for about the last 8 months I've been here. I attribute it to pollution.

 

Medical Care- the medical care in most cities is horrendous. I suffer from severe migraines so it can be a real problem for me.

 

Cultural ignorance- If you've spent any long amount of time in China you will realize that the huge majority of Chinese are extremely culturally ignorant. There are so many examples of this..... for just one- 99% of people think I'm Russian but come up to me speaking English anyways.

 

Treatment of Animals- this one really gets me down.

 

A personal one for me is food- but that's just cuz I'm picky.

[awch]

Staring is not considered rude in China, it is the way people learn about new things they might not have ever seen before. No offense is meant and none should be taken.

 

Sorry, but I just don't agree with this. Staring is rude and most Chinese people know it. I've asked my students many times if it's rude to stare and they always say YES.

 

Also, I've never heard any Chinese person say that it's not rude to stare- only foreigners when they want to make up an excuse for why they get stared at.

[cosmiclobster]

I didn't find the air pollution that bad when I was there, it was the weather that sucked, either way too hot and humid or too cold.

 

I didn't mind the stares, there weren't that many, but I did see a lot of small kids that looked at me like I was an alien creature!!

 

The shoving your way into the metro or into an elevator kinda bothered me at first, but in Shanghai with 16 million people, some of it is to be expected. The people in the biggest hurry pushed their way to the front and the rest didn't really care about it. At least on the NY subway the people are courteous enough to let the people out of the car before they try to get in.

 

In GZ on Beijing Lu there were at least 10 people who approached me and wanted me to buy one of the many "watchee" on their wrist. I smiled and nodded my head and said watchee! as I pointed to the watch on my wrist, as if to say to them: Great! You know how to say watch in English!!

[tonado]

I don't like the smoking and spitting at everywhere. Maybe because it was in Nanning. I wonder if Shanghai is like that. Shanghai is supposed to be a modern city.

[LeeFisher3]

Staring is not considered rude in China, it is the way people learn about new things they might not have ever seen before. No offense is meant and none should be taken.

 

Sorry, but I just don't agree with this. Staring is rude and most Chinese people know it. I've asked my students many times if it's rude to stare and they always say YES.

 

Also, I've never heard any Chinese person say that it's not rude to stare- only foreigners when they want to make up an excuse for why they get stared at.

137549[/snapback]

The stares I received were usually from much older people, there are very few westerners in Fushun and it seems we are a curiousity.

 

I recall one man who came to a dead stop upon seeing me and fixed his gaze upon me. I think he was somewhat surprised to see something so different in his world. But there was no need for me to take offense or become upset over this.

[Dan R]

Lee I went out on my own one morning in Liaoyang, south of Fushun. I was a few blocks from the hotel and turned a corner on to a main street. As soon as I made the turn about a hundred set of eyes were quickly turned my way and everywhere I looked they were staring at me. It was a bit discomforting.

 

At least in Yantai when I went for a walk there were the two old toothless women crouched along the street talking. They laughed when they saw me and waved to me. I waved back and they laughed more. That was nice. Those toothless grins looked beautiful. In Liaoyang only smileless stares. It is also a very conservative place and several people said most people there believe the government propaganda about Americans. Anyone I was introduced to though was very friendly. It just shows if we could get government out of the international relations thing individuals would do fine.

 

Can you imagine all those sleepy people early in the morning on their way to work like any other day. Suddenly an alien balding, bearded, ponytailed and overweight is shoved into their midsts shattering their safe routine.

[Randy W]

I think staring is pretty much of a non-event.

 

The most interesting stares I've received were in India - one on a very rural street corner. There were about 10 to 20 people, all just looking directly at me, no one talking, no motion, until one guy picks up a big stick, snaps it in two, and proceeds to clean the mud from his bicycle wheel well. Shortly after that, I saw a group of kids playing soccer. I took a picture and walked away. A short while later, I heard a noise and turned around to look. They were all there smiling, waiting for me to take another picture.

 

Don't think anything of it.

[LeeFisher3]

Lee I went out on my own one morning in Liaoyang, south of Fushun. I was a few blocks from the hotel and turned a corner on to a main street. As soon as I made the turn about a hundred set of eyes  were quickly turned my way and everywhere I looked they were staring at me. It was a bit discomforting.

 

At least in Yantai when I went for a walk there were the two old toothless women crouched along the street talking. They laughed when they saw me and waved to me. I waved back and they laughed more. That was nice. Those toothless grins looked beautiful. In Liaoyang only smileless stares. It is also a very conservative place and several people said most people there believe the government propaganda about Americans. Anyone I was introduced to though was very friendly. It just shows if we could get government out of the international relations thing individuals would do fine.

 

Can you imagine all those sleepy people early in the morning on their way to work like any other day. Suddenly an alien balding, bearded, ponytailed and overweight is shoved into their midsts shattering their safe routine.

137611[/snapback]

Lucky you escaped with the facial hair intact.

 

There seems to be a huge difference between northern and southern China. Many of the experiences with street vendors and beggars are somewhat forgein to my experiences.

 

The American propaganda about China is just as bad, had a customer explain to me why China was his enemy on Friday. After listening to him I felt like telling him he should redirect his anger toward WalMart.

[david_dawei]

Staring is not considered rude in China, it is the way people learn about new things they might not have ever seen before. No offense is meant and none should be taken.

 

Sorry, but I just don't agree with this. Staring is rude and most Chinese people know it. I've asked my students many times if it's rude to stare and they always say YES.

 

Also, I've never heard any Chinese person say that it's not rude to stare- only foreigners when they want to make up an excuse for why they get stared at.

137549[/snapback]

I've read it in most guide books and even language books written by chinese.

 

It's curiosity, not intending to be an ill mannered act...

[david_dawei]

Staring is not considered rude in China, it is the way people learn about new things they might not have ever seen before. No offense is meant and none should be taken.

 

Sorry, but I just don't agree with this. Staring is rude and most Chinese people know it. I've asked my students many times if it's rude to stare and they always say YES.

 

Also, I've never heard any Chinese person say that it's not rude to stare- only foreigners when they want to make up an excuse for why they get stared at.

137549[/snapback]

The stares I received were usually from much older people, there are very few westerners in Fushun and it seems we are a curiousity.

 

I recall one man who came to a dead stop upon seeing me and fixed his gaze upon me. I think he was somewhat surprised to see something so different in his world. But there was no need for me to take offense or become upset over this.

137597[/snapback]

I used to joke with Zixuan about all the stares.. it was like the 'wave' at a ball game... heads would turn in domino effect.. and you could hear them all murmur, "mei guo ren"...

 

This is what it takes to overcome cultural ignorance maybe... they cannot come out of their land, so we should greet them in their own land...

[Dan R]

You are right about the big differences. It is like two distant lands. Hey they are further than any European countries from each other.

 

That person should stop worrying about enemies and start building friendships.

 

What is more curious than a Laowai dropped on a corner in the middle of 1.3 billion Chinese?

[C4Racer]

I find it interesting that many seem to insist on other countries adhering to US cultural practices in their native country. This is similar to the US State Department’s behavior which has been somewhat dreadful in dealing with the rest of the world and could explain many peoples view point of the USA.

 

China is one of the most crowded places in the world and their society had adopted a social behavior that works for them. The people do not demand the same space requirements or take offense at some behaviors Americans and behavior that is acceptable in the US is considered extremely rude in China.

 

In traffic or shopping I never saw anyone take offense or become angered with someone else who might have been in a bigger hurry and the pushing and maneuvering was only a means to get from one place to another. Staring is not considered rude in China, it is the way people learn about new things they might not have ever seen before. No offense is meant and none should be taken.

 

This is a very ancient society and they have many methods of social behavior that are meant to provide each person a sense of dignity and respect.

 

I am sure there are those who have not taken the time to understand why public displays of affection are frowned upon in China. The short story is they do not wish to make others feel bad, you can never tell if another person would feel pain in seeing this and realizing their life was missing something as wonderful as love. This behavior is out of respect for others.

 

In short, a person should take time to learn a bit about other countries culture and traditions before visiting. It demonstrates a respect for others that is not usually demonstrated by the majority of Americans. When you provide a little effort to respect other cultures you will find that people go out of their way to make you feel like an honored guest and this does not just apply to China.

137530[/snapback]

Great Post. It is not only our State Department, but some tourists that give America a bad name, as well.

Some American travelers take the view of the State Department and carry it a little bit further. When they travel to other countries, they look down their noses at the local population. They also demand to be treated like the "American they are." Luckily for us most of these tourists stick to tour groups and do not wander far from the tour, even in places like Biejing and Shanghai.

 

It is wonderful to get out from these tourist areas and experience the real China. Yes, it is crowded, polluted and just plain different, but this this is the mystic of visiting a different country. You can hardly say you've been to another country unless you have truely experienced the culture.

 

I did not let stares bother me. Saw it as someone who was curious and amazed that an American would travel to thier part of China. I simply smiled at them. Many times, I would see a smile in return.

 

The litter bothered me a little. I understand it gives someone a job cleaning up after people. The problem is some times the cleaners do not care. Saw this problem in GUZ near the embassy. Watched a street sweeper clean a sidwalk. Couldn't tell after she was done that she had really done anything, just sort of went through the motions.

 

Driving was a different experience. Drove my brother-in-laws Nissan pickup in Nanning. Found it to be as crowded as LA, but the traffic flowed smoother. You just have to understand the rules of the road. Stay to your side of the road most of the time. Passing is allowed almost anywhere. You may use the other side of the road to pass provided it is free of oncoming traffic. This constant passing done in the cities is where you get the feeling of controlled chaos. One thing I fell in love with was the timers on the traffic lights telling you how many more seconds the light would stay green. Wish we had those here in Portland.

 

The only part I really hated was as my wife puts it, "too many many people." Crowds bon't bother me much, but Nanning on the weekend was almost unbearable. Shoulder to shoulder. Normal five minute walk turns into a half hour. The pushing and shoving. Just learned to push and shove back!!

 

Now, how about things we loved. Food!!! The food (real Chines food) absolutely incredible. Some times it was interesting, like the snake wine. Mostly, even the parts I would not think of eating normally where very good. My wife's father is an incredible cook.

[Randy W]

The looks I got in Guangxi were all of the "hello, there" (very friendly) type.

 

In Beijing, like I said earlier, they were far more interested in my SO than in me.

[Yuanyang]

The looks I got in Guangxi were all of the "hello, there" (very friendly) type.

 

In Beijing, like I said earlier, they were far more interested in my SO than in me.

137700[/snapback]

Same for my SO as she use to be a TV news reporter. She just ignored them and (I learned later) would say that she is not that person.

 

I expected to receive stares, the way I handled it if they were close was to smile, look them in the eye and shake their hands. I did come across a few people that had some hard looks in their eyes. Most usually were older and still wore the 'Mao' suits. So I wrote them off as 'hayseeds'. After all when I take my wife and daughter to see the small east Texas town where I was raised, I expect they'll receive stares and gawks.

 

Litter - From my days when I worked in food processing I have an automatic reflex to pick up litter and throw it in a trash container. People look at me like I had taken off my clothes.

 

Air pollution is horrible in her home city. It was worse in December as the sand laid on the roads filled the air. That took me 3 weeks and 2 visits to the doctor in order to recover.

 

Toliets - Getting better in Beijing! From the smell in December I had expected it to be totally awful in May. Not so, the Olympics are driving a lot of clean up in that town.

 

All and all I accept China and the Chinese for what it is and what it may become. After all this is the country and the culture that produced my darling wife.

[sylinchinastill]

In traffic or shopping I never saw anyone take offense or become angered with someone else who might have been in a bigger hurry and the pushing and maneuvering was only a means to get from one place to another. Staring is not considered rude in China, it is the way people learn about new things they might not have ever seen before. No offense is meant and none should be taken.

 

I disagree. I know tons of Chinese people who get really frustrated with the pushing. I have seen people break out into fights over pushing in the middle of the subway and other places. I don't think it is that people from the US are pushing our perspective on China. Yes- you do have to adapt- but a lot of the things have less to do with culture and more to do with economics- India is the same way with pushing and to say that the two countries have the same culture would be ridiculous. But more and more people are beginning to get frustrated with people frustrating and things like that. Staring is considered rude in China. If you will notice- people with suits on and the younger business-types will not stare at you. It is a class factor just like it is here. Some mamas teach their kids not to stare and some don't- in every society.

 

I find it interesting that there is another divide in perspective between the woman and men on this site- primarily this is based on the fact that most of the women here have lived in China while the men have visited. My parents both visited China and loved everything about it. Vacation- or even living for a time period of less than three months is totally different from living there for a while. I remember when I first went to China I loved it. I thought there were so many cool things about it and everything was great and perfect because my rose-colored glasses were still on. But after living in China for a few years I ran into some problems and found problems with things. The bathrooms- the sanitation- the pollution. I remember in Shanghai some days you couldn't see the sun even when it was sunny from the pollution. Stuff like that. I find it absurd to be proud of people staring at your spouse because my husband would get so offended with me when people stared at me. Once he almost got into a fight on the subway. I guess it depends- he knew that I hated it and there are also different types of stares. I don't mind stares of curiousity but I have also dealt with stares of animosity which can be very painful. Anyway- I'm sure what I say won't change anyone's point of view- and that's fine. I wish I could still see China through the eyes I did when I first went there. I wish my world view could be as open as it was before I actually lived in places and in different circumstances.