May I change K1 visa to F1 visa and stay in the US

[blueheart73]

After one year's waiting, and another 3 months after I got my K1 visa, my fiancee finally asked me to come to the US. But things seem have changed so much, the man I used to love so much now is almost a stranger to me...I don't want to describe the details, only want to ask a question: if I get an offer from some school, can I change this K1 visa to a F1 visa and so I can stay in the US?

[Alex]

What happened?

[chinadave2001]

no.

[Jeikun]

Someone more knowledgable may wish to correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe that a K visa can't be extended or changed, other than for the purpose it was originally issued for.

 

I would like to be wrong though, I'm very sorry to hear that. It's terrible when you believe in something, and wait and fight for it so long, only to realize at the end that it's no longer what you want, or that it's truly out of reach. I know how you feel.

 

You might want to ask yourself though: Did you come to the US to marry this man, or were you marrying this man to come to the US? If it was all about being with your love, and now the relationship is dead - and coming to America was about being with the man you wanted to marry, not for it's own sake - then you shouldn't feel too bad about having to go.

 

I know, once being here, one may wish to stay and take advantage of many of the oppertunities here, and if there is a way to do that, and it's what you want remembering that you've left your whole past life behind, and now aren't even going to be with the man you came to marry, then go for it.

 

I'm not trying to sound grim, I just want you to not make a mistake some people I know have made. Don't get so caught up in wanting to stay here, that you do something like marry him even if you no longer love him, or he no longer loves you. I don't know you, but I don't have to know anyone to be able to tell them that "You're worth more than that."

 

This might not help much. I honestly hope everything works out for you though. Whatever that means.

 

- Jason

[robandbolor]

um i dont think so. i think its 3 months and thats it.

 

you have to reapply outside the US - try to get your school paperwork ready before you go maybe?

 

i know i may be a bit naive, but usually in a break up the first thing i would think is that someone would want to go home, sort of like a security blanket. your english is pretty good, i feel something is amiss.

 

if it was his fault and you feel you may be ostracized in your country, such as domestic violence or in that vein, you may be able to stay longer to sort things out. i am not an expert but lotsa free legal services are available.

 

if you did come just to come to the US, you owe him an apology, for pulling his strings for over the past year. he could have spent it trying to find his true love instead of being fooled.

 

my apologies, but some guy waiting over a year for you is saying alot about his committment. i would guess that there was alot of communications and whatnot, as you received a visa. sometimes things do go wrong like any relationship, but trying to stay in the US sounds a bit too self serving and strange, since most people would be more emotional and want to just leave and forget?

 

anyways, good luck.

[DaveR]

I read on one website, that a K-1 can only be used for the purpose it was intended for. You can only stay by marrying the person who petitioned for you to come to the US. You cannot marry anyone else or change to a student or tourist visa. The only way K-1 can change status is by marriage in 90 days, if that does not happen, then the visa expires and the person needs to return to thier country.

 

It may be harsh, but sounds like you have to return to China. The K-1 is designed for the parties to get to know each other better before they marry. It sounds like you and your fiancee will not marry, so the K-1 has worked the way it is designed to. Your only option is to return to China and see if can apply for an F-1 visa.

 

David

[Dave G.]

After one year's waiting, and another 3 months after I got my K1 visa, my fiancee finally asked me to come to the US. But things seem have changed so much, the man I used to love so much now is almost a stranger to me...I don't want to describe the details, only want to ask a question: if I get an offer from some school, can I change this K1 visa to a F1 visa and so I can stay in the US?

Like I said in a previous thread similar to this one....

 

Whoa...let's slow things down a bit. We don't have enough details to launch into any assumptions. Until more info is provided, we can only take the original post at face value.

 

1. It seems she is on US soil. From the sounds of it, she arrived here and shortly became disillusioned with the man she once loved and wanted to marry. She never mentioned if they had or hadn't tied the knot. Since she referred to the guy as her fiancé, I'm guessing they haven't.

 

2. I'm fascinated by the three month wait after the visa was issued. Some of us here get right over to China to be with loved ones to support them in the interview process. Others (like me) get plane reservations worked out once we get the interview date. That's why the three month wait is so titillating. I'd like to know more.

 

3. To answer the question regarding changing a K1 for a F1, CD said it so eloquently.

No.

The US government isn't like Wal-Mart. You can't exchange visas because it didn't fit right.

 

Here is my suggested course of action depending on the situation:

 

If you are married -

 

1. Get the marriage annulled. It's clear any feelings you once had are gone. I'm very sorry for that.

 

2. Get as much information you can from universities you are interested in. Talk to admission offices and get all the forms needed for applying to the school. I'd even go further and make a personal contact with someone you can send emails to.

 

3. This one is important: Go home before the 90 days have expired. It will be much easier to get the F1 when the consulate sees you abided by the rules. They'll be much more understanding -- and perhaps more sympathetic.

 

If you are not married -

 

1. See #s 2 and 3 above.

 

Of course, there are other options available to you:

 

1. Overstay the visa and take your chances. It'll be a couple of years before the gov't catches up to you. The worst thing that'll happen is you get deported...but even that takes a long time. Keep in mind you'll find life in the US extremely difficult without a social security number.

 

2. Keep working on the relationship. Maybe you can rekindle that spark. But, you'll have to do it fast. If you don't marry in the 90 days, the gov't might not accept your further stay if the marriage doesn't comply with the 90 day rule.

 

3. Marry the guy. Use him until you get to a point in the adjustment of status process where you can divorce. Make sure you get alimony on top of a green card. To make the alimony issue easier, keep a copy of the I-864. In it, your husband swears an oath to the US gov't to provide for all your needs for 10 years. I'm sure any family court judge would be bound to make him honor that pledge.

 

You wouldn't be the first to make these kinds of decisions and you wouldn't be the last.

 

 

I'm very sorry the relationship didn't work out for you. It's a long wait for the visa. It's never easy for anyone to have their hopes and dreams dashed. Alas, it does happen no matter who you are or where you come from.

 

The bottom line is this: your fiancé/husband owes you three things based on what you wrote. They are: an apology, financial support during the 90 days, and a ticket home. You owe him an apology ("I'm sorry this didn't work out like we planned"), any engagement ring given back (our culture says if the woman calls off the marriage, the ring is returned to the man), and your return to China.

 

This is the important part: The US government provided you with a visa so you can marry. We're funny that way in this country...we really do want families to be together (we're just too slow making it happen!). Because the relationship didn't work out, there's no family to speak of and therefore no need for a K1 visa. If you don't marry and if you stay past the 90 days, your fiancé owes you nothing. No support...no plane ticket...nothing. You would have made a decision beyond what the agreement was in the visa process and you would therefore be responsible for your own support. Please remember that no matter the details, your fiancé has feelings and rights too. Don't take advantage of him or his US citizenship.

 

Good luck finding schools and the such. When you apply for the F1, you'll have all your ducks in a row which should make the process easier.

[cqhk]

Seems like you would have to go back if you don't get married. Don't you want to go home? Seems like the logical thing to do. No sense hanging around and getting more depressed.

 

"if I get an offer from some school..."

 

Are you a professor, as in a school might offer you an internship? Or are you a student, and do you mean if a school accepts an application you might file? I don't think a K-1 beneficiary can apply for school here, until after their is an AOS. I'm not sure, but it seems right. Potential foreign students have to get a letter of acceptance from a school before they can even apply for a student visa to come here. If you are professor and get a job offer from a school, just go home and apply for a visa to come here to work for that school. They can send an invitation letter for you work for them, and you can use that to apply for a visa to come back.

 

What are you looking for love, work, or just to live here?

 

Your written english is very good. I have no doubt you'd probably pass a TOEFL exam.

 

I would suggest you go back home, if you really feel your fiance and yourself have no future. Staying in this country probably isn't worth marrying someone you don't love or who doesn't love you. You're depressed already, unhappy married life will make it worse.

 

Since you don't give any details, no idea who needs to apologize to who. Maybe the feelings of disappointment are mutual, so no apologies needed. If you are sincere, you'll find someone just as sincere once you go back home.

 

best wishes,

[robandbolor]

hmm, i caught that too if anyone was looking. are you in the US or about to leave for the US? it sounded like you were in the US to me, and well, you and he gave it the 3 months and were about to go seperate ways (at least that is how it sounded to me). if you are serious about staying, i recommend you try to find a way to get to canada, and work it from there (i know a few foreign students who did this and continued to work there, you can cross the border anytime and visit, so its not like having to go back at all). plus its legal.

 

if you haven't left for the US, do a heart to heart with the fiance. honestly, he could have found another person, which could explain his change of heart. or it could just be jitters. from that point on it's your decision and you would have to live with it.

 

i dont see why this isnt like any other relationship, if you break up, then you break up - it just seems weird when one person says "no more" yet "i want to continue to live with you" and ask for him/her to be responsible for continued support (because he signed a pledge to the government on your status)? my apologies if i am straightforward.

 

but since i did this process, a year is a lonnnnggg time. i constantly asked myself over and over a thousand times, "do i really want to do this?" and my fiance told me over and over, if she even suspected anything funny about me, she didnt want to see me again. so, in some ways the lengthy time kinda helped us in proving its real - we had alot of tripwires. that is why its so surprising that neither one of you suspected something in over a year? and still managed the interview? someone should have "tripped" a wire?

 

if you want the student visa, apply for an f-1, but be prepared because the costs of foreign students in the US is pretty steep. plus, you need the TOEFL i think or proof you can do coursework - but save these - its not too difficult a process compared to the k-1.

[chinadave2001]

HI all,

having endured a failed attempt at k1 visa last year, maybe these are just the rantings of a jaded man.....

 

It seems to me that we have seen a few of these types of posts in recent months....I am a bit surprised that there isn't more anger at these folks who seem intent on beating the system. If anything, some of you seem rather sympathetic to them.

It is because of those who want to cheat the system that your fiance visa process takes so long. It is because of those who cheat that you cannot invite her family over without extreme difficulty. Everytime one of these folks beats the sytem, and many do, our state department makes it harder for those folks who have legitimate reasons for immigrating.....

 

If she has no intention to marry the petioner, she has no business using a k1 visa. Having waited for one year to come here, having told her family and friends that she was doing so, losing face...etc...do not collectively justify what she is intending to do. And if she succeeds, it just becomes harder for everyone else.

 

Just my thoughts.

 

CD

[Guest chinagirl001]

hi blueheart, you can not change K1 visa to other visa, however, you can come over by the K1 visa then just disappear, you can get an ID from NYC or the other large cities, good luck to you

[se_lang]

3. Marry the guy.  Use him until you get to a point in the adjustment of status process where you can divorce.  Make sure you get alimony on top of a green card.  To make the alimony issue easier, keep a copy of the I-864.  In it, your husband swears an oath to the US gov't to provide for all your needs for 10 years.  I'm sure any family court judge would be bound to make him honor that pledge.

Who are you and what have you done with our Dave!!!

 

This is a very simple thing "Do what is right" not "Do what is right for you"

[blueheart73]

Until tonight I have some privacy time to read the response of my question. First, I'd like to say, I appreciate all of you. You are so kind to give me so much suggestions and showed so much care. However, it's really not easy to describe the whole situation by a few words...I feel better that last night my fiancee and I talked a while after I cried again, communication is always the most important thing in a relationship. Still, I can't say that we'll get married and we'll live happily ever since.

 

It's a long story if I have to begin from the start. I'm not a pratical woman, I met him only because he talked with me by yahoo messenger, and I happened to have time and wanted to pratice English with him. I never know how to enter any chatting room or any online dating website. I did love him, and loved him more when we met in person, that I quited my offers of some best Australia schools, if I hadn't, I would have finished half the course of some master program. Some people may say, America is better than Australia, but as for me, they are almost the same, my life in China was pretty good, I'd like to go abroad because I somewhat like the lifestyle in western countries and hope to live a more peaceful and easier life. I really don't have to use my fiancee to go abroad, if somebody say that I love him because he is an American, well, I have to admit that probably deep in my mind, I think American men are more interesting and romantic than most Chinese men,that's all. His personality did impress me so much, and so far, I still love him, at least in most aspects. No matter if I could remain in the US or not, if we won't get married, it would hurt me so much, while if I have to return to China, it would hurt me more because I have to face a lot of difficulties in life, such as, probably I don't have the energy to apply schools in foreign countries again. After quited my job when we got engaged(we expected the K1 procedure much quicker), for more than a year most time I just stayed home, and did some volunteer job in a non-profit organization, and now probably it's uneasy for me to get a good job again. To lose face among family and friends is not what I concern, but the fact is, I would be tired of explaining the reasons and I don't like people's sympathy to me.

 

I don't quite understand why my fiancee let me wait for extra 3 months after I got the visa. He didn't explain too much, but he said many times that he was "depressed", not because of me, but because of some problems in his life. We both never get married before, he is 42 and I'm 32, now we do have some difficulties to get along in real life, and I feel we know each other more each and every day. He has been sick before I came, and had to stay home for maybe another half month, which makes the situation worse. I think we both need support, but we both don't quite know how to show the consideration. Sometimes he treated me so meanly. For example, when i helped him to do some housework, he often coldly tell me not to do because I did it in a different way from him. When I said I didn't like some food, he got unhappy and kept unhappy for long time. He chatted online with aother girl quite often and has dozens of her photos, and he insists she's just a casual friend, like a sister. And strangely, although I'm quite independent, I don't know why recently I'm so sentimental, that I often cry, can't control my temper, often get impatient and depressed, I miss my family in China crazily, that when he is mean to me, it will make me feel extremely bad and I just keep on crying...That bothers him much as he doesn't think he did anything wrong and he doesn't know why I act this way, so he keeps on saying that maybe I should return to China, then I would be happier. I don't know if other people have experienced as hard time I do at the very beginning.

 

Thanks you guys to have patience if you have finished reading my silly and long message, anyways I feel better now. I do hope to talk with some friends, and how I wish I'll see my fiancee's smile every day, and I do care about him, even he said, "Honey, can we go to China and live there?" Really I would be glad to.

[blueheart73]

I just read the last message, I'll say, I admit some Chinese women do marry Americans for a better life, such as green card or something...My fiancee knows that I don't love him for his American citizenship, I used to live in Shanghai, as I said, my life was not bad. I don't love him for money either, as my savings is much more than him. I love him just because he is him, but now sometimes love is hurting us so much. As for some women who married for green card, probably they wouldn't feel so hurt, as why do they care anyways. Sometimes, in some degree, I feel it's so unfair, that I have to wait so long, and have had to give up so much, to meet him here, if love has changed, I have to suffer the worst result.

[Patrick & Li]

I have read and re-read this thread.

It really is too bad that people don't realize the sacrifice and hard work that it takes to get this Visa.

But for me, and my wife, it was never about the Visa. It was about making a life together in a country that gives us more opportunities to be successful. If my wife hadnt been able to get her Visa, Then i was willing and able to quit my job, sell my house and get a teaching job in China. This is about LOVE.

 

Blueheart, I feel as if you have been USED by someone who wasnt ready or maybe even able to truly commit to the relationship/Marriage. I am sorry that you have been used this way. My heart goes out to you.

 

The bottom line is....If he will not marry you within the 90 day time period, then you will have to leave this country.

 

Seems to me the lesson to be learned is, If a Chinese lady's fiancee asked her to come to the USA to marry him. She should flat out refuse unless he came there and married her first.

To me, the K1 is a shitty commitment! It leaves it too wide open for abuse from both sides!

 

Patrick