The Power Shift - What do (Chinese) Women Want?

[DennisLeiqin]

Oh yes they can stare, David. I get stared at as if I am an inanimate object. There's certainly no three second rule when it comes to staring at me! Usually those hard, long stares are from men.

 

I have asked some Chinese men do they notice, most don't understand the question.

Our context was staring at women. If we now shift this to staring at foreigners then that goes without saying...

No. It's not about staring at women. It's simply whether or not they even notice. You introduced that noticing equated to ogling, staring.

[Randy W]

Oh yes they can stare, David. I get stared at as if I am an inanimate object. There's certainly no three second rule when it comes to staring at me! Usually those hard, long stares are from men.

 

I have asked some Chinese men do they notice, most don't understand the question.

Our context was staring at women. If we now shift this to staring at foreigners then that goes without saying...

 

Men tend to look at my wife more than they do me - with no time limitations. I find the Chinese stare more comfortable than that of Americans, since they don't try to look away before they think you might notice.

 

The only one I find disconcerting is when they give one of us a blank look, and then look at the other without changing expression.

Edited May 4, 2012 by Randy W (see edit history)

[Guest ExChinaExpat]

Oh yes they can stare, David. I get stared at as if I am an inanimate object. There's certainly no three second rule when it comes to staring at me! Usually those hard, long stares are from men.

 

I have asked some Chinese men do they notice, most don't understand the question.

Our context was staring at women. If we now shift this to staring at foreigners then that goes without saying...

 

Men tend to look at my wife more than they do me - with no time limitations. I find the Chinese stare more comfortable than that of Americans, since they don't try to look away before they think you might notice.

 

The only one I find disconcerting is when they give one of us a blank look, and then look at the other without changing expression.

 

Randy, your wife is a very attractive woman. But honestly, not only men, but Chinese women check out every woman who is with a foreign man very carefully.

[Randy W]

 

Men tend to look at my wife more than they do me - with no time limitations. I find the Chinese stare more comfortable than that of Americans, since they don't try to look away before they think you might notice.

 

The only one I find disconcerting is when they give one of us a blank look, and then look at the other without changing expression.

 

Randy, your wife is a very attractive woman. But honestly, not only men, but Chinese women check out every woman who is with a foreign man very carefully.

 

I understand- my last comment there (about the blank look) came from mostly women.

 

That's the only look that I really can't get a grasp on the meaning. The ones I enjoy the most are when someone spots me, and then turns to their buddy, who then turns and looks at me an almost predictable number of seconds later (not TOO quickly). You can practically read what they're saying - doesn't matter that it's in Chinese.

[tsap seui]

..... honestly, not only men, but Chinese women check out every woman who is with a foreign man very carefully.

 

 

WHOOOOWEEEE, GREAT point Jesse. Chinese wimmin DEFINATELY check out any woman who is with a foreigner, as do Chinese men. Heck, that may be the only time Chinese men look at Chinese wimmins....LOL

 

tsap seui

[ChrisA]

..... honestly, not only men, but Chinese women check out every woman who is with a foreign man very carefully.

 

 

WHOOOOWEEEE, GREAT point Jesse. Chinese wimmin DEFINATELY check out any woman who is with a foreigner, as do Chinese men. Heck, that may be the only time Chinese men look at Chinese wimmins....LOL

 

tsap seui

 

LOL.. Tsap, I agree as I have seen this happem more times than I can remember, some of the looks at time weren't pleasant either!

[DennisLeiqin]

 

 

Randy, your wife is a very attractive woman. But honestly, not only men, but Chinese women check out every woman who is with a foreign man very carefully.

And, they continue to do it here in the states too. First a look at me. Then a look at Leiqin. Then back to me... then back to her...

 

Leiqin notices it and is always proud that these women look. She says they are sizing us up to to see what type of Chinese woman draws a laowei.

[tsap seui]

..... honestly, not only men, but Chinese women check out every woman who is with a foreign man very carefully.

 

 

WHOOOOWEEEE, GREAT point Jesse. Chinese wimmin DEFINATELY check out any woman who is with a foreigner, as do Chinese men. Heck, that may be the only time Chinese men look at Chinese wimmins....LOL

 

tsap seui

 

LOL.. Tsap, I agree as I have seen this happem more times than I can remember, some of the looks at time weren't pleasant either!

 

Shucks buddy, up in Fushun, Liaoning Provience I get looked at like I stepped out of a space ship and have a banana tree growing out of my right ear and a 4 foot long John Thomas dangling between my legs...LOL We go for a walk in the park and everyone leaves the tiger and bear cages and comes to look at the animal from America. They run by us and take photos with their cell phones or ask me to pose with their young kids. We go out to eat in a restaurant and are forced to eat in a private room....well, unless you like everyone in the restaurant staring at you as you slurp yore seaweed soup and pick the eyeballs out of the cat's head to give them lovingly and romatically to yore wife before you crack the skull to get at the brains...good thing I grew up in Maryland and learned how to crack crab shells, eh?

 

Honestly, I really like Chiner...when there I got used to being on "display" and buddy, I can blow my nose on the sidewalk and piss on the side of downtown buildings with the best of them...nyuk, nyuk, nyuk....Hmmmmm I always try to do what I think Curly would do in the same situation.

 

Tell us some of your stories....I jes loves hearin' tales of feats done in Chinertucky, and have a big polk plum full of them myowndamnself to share. Life jes ain't worth livin' if'n ya can't laugh at it, and yerowndamnself. Know wudda mean?

 

tsap seui

[david_dawei]

Oh yes they can stare, David. I get stared at as if I am an inanimate object. There's certainly no three second rule when it comes to staring at me! Usually those hard, long stares are from men.

 

I have asked some Chinese men do they notice, most don't understand the question.

Our context was staring at women. If we now shift this to staring at foreigners then that goes without saying...

No. It's not about staring at women. It's simply whether or not they even notice. You introduced that noticing equated to ogling, staring.

My context was staring at women. If you want to change that context, then we can discuss it. I already commented on 'whether they notice or not'; good luck getting face answers that are truthful. And I did not equate noticing to gling, staring; they are two issues for me.

[david_dawei]

The only one I find disconcerting is when they give one of us a blank look, and then look at the other without changing expression.

Exactly why should they change expression? That would reveal some intent... or noticing... Let's look at their reason they are able to NOT change expressions if they happen to stare or look?

[david_dawei]

But honestly, not only men, but Chinese women check out every woman who is with a foreign man very carefully.

And for good reason... in their eyes... like, what fish bait did she use, etc... LOL

[Guest ExChinaExpat]

But honestly, not only men, but Chinese women check out every woman who is with a foreign man very carefully.

And for good reason... in their eyes... like, what fish bait did she use, etc... LOL

 

Exactly. Well, in many cases anyway. There are still quite a few people in China who don't like to see a Chinese woman with a man outside her race. However, in general, I think the people of China are more accepting of mixed race relationships than many Americans.

[david_dawei]

But honestly, not only men, but Chinese women check out every woman who is with a foreign man very carefully.

And for good reason... in their eyes... like, what fish bait did she use, etc... LOL

 

Exactly. Well, in many cases anyway. There are still quite a few people in China who don't like to see a Chinese woman with a man outside her race. However, in general, I think the people of China are more accepting of mixed race relationships than many Americans.

And this is why IT IS NOT about noticing... but about staring.

 

This proves beyond a shadow of any doubt that they notice everything... what they choose to stare at is the most telling part... JMO.

[chef4u]

Hey all, thanks for the welcome backs. Anyway, I enjoy being stared by all the Chinese. Why? Because, when they are staring, I put a huge smile on my face and frantically wave at them. Of course, I have the last laugh as they soon find themselves crashing their bodies into a nearby lamp post or another person. Ah, the failure of the Chinese to let go of long stares at a lil old laowei. But seriously, I always have fun smiling and waving back at them;to see their boyish/girlish laughing, giggling responses are...simply priceless.

[ChrisA]

Wow, having words about staring or ogling, this goes hand in hand, happen to me every time I was in China, and it’s not gender related, men and women are doing it, the men on the other hand gave rude, degusting and nasty looks when the ex and I were walking hand in hand. The women gave mostly hard none approving looks, mostly from jealousy or some other factor. It happens in every society, get used to it. The younger generation didn’t really care, but they were looking too. Seriously I remember standing at bus stop, and the guys riding their moped’s suffering whip-lash every time they saw a foreigner waiting for the bus, was funny as hell as I was waiting for one of them to run into a bus, told the ex that they need to have the United Color of Benetton Poster with all the different races painted on all the walls at all the bus stops so the people would get used to seeing foreigners.

 

Now if want to see some people who will really stare at you, go to Germany, it’s not a 15 second stare, it could last up to a minute.

Edited May 19, 2012 by ChrisA (see edit history)