Inauspicious topic

[griz326]

Just wanted to highlight a couple of things I learned from my recent hospitalization and close brush with death:

 

*** Did you specify in your will what should be done with you when you die?

*** Did you specify a funeral home to handle your remains?

 

I updated my will and living will before I got sick, but was surprised when the hospital asked me what should be done with my remains and who should handle it. I know that I specified in one of my final documents that I was to be cremated, but I did not say who was supposed to handle that.

 

--- I'd like to suggest that you negotiate with a local funeral home and make the arrangements part of your final paperwork. It seems just too much to ask a spouse new to this country to handle those affairs.

 

--- I'd also recommend that if your employer's insurance coverage offers income replacement for long and short term disabilities that you take it. That's saving our bacon right now. (If it is not part of your package, find it some where.)

 

--- I'd also say that having some insurance coverage for the education of the children is important too.

 

 

I've been so stubborn over the years that I never carried much insurance. When I got married again, I made a lucky decision to buy insurance to take care of my new responsibilities.

 

While there are not many people as stupidly stubborn as I can be, I just thought I'd offer this up for those who might try to claim my former title of "King of the bullheads."

 

[RobertH]

All good point you bring up Grizz. Now you said close brush with death what's that all about? I thought you were just going in for some type of back surgery. If it's not too much to ask fill us in on what type of back surgery you had and what was your life threatening moments kinda worried about you.

 

I had my back surgery about 5 weeks ago now. I think I'm getting better the pain is greatly reduced but I'm still very weak. I get tired very easy and my leg gets really tired and start cramping up if I'm up on it too much.

[george lee]

hi griz,

 

i'm happy that you are doing well at this moment.

 

what kind of insurance did you get? whole or term life insurance? there are so many questions to buying whole or term and its confusing for me. why you choose that over that? you can pm if its confidentical. i'm in the process of buying insurance form my family just in case something goes wrong. thanks.

[george lee]

anyone can add or comment on insurance topic if they like, much appreciated.

[griz326]

I don't know the specifics about the insurance, George. It provides for both long-term and short-term disability and income replacement based on a percentage of your earnings. When I log on to our HR site I'll see if I can get more details.

 

Robert, the surgeon told me the sort of infection I had is pretty rare. It was an abscess inside the vertebrae and putting pressure on the spinal cord. I was told my spine was filled with green puss...which is supposed to mean something. ??? The surgery was performed on an emergency basis with the doc scheduling the surgical suite and arranging my admission while I was still in the MRI.

 

To get into my spine, they had to cut sections of vertebrae bone out of each vertebrae. The procedure is called a laminectomy and the surgeon did at least 10 of them - that makes me spineless . (He didn't save the pieces. I wanted to make keychains out of them and give them to friends with the message, "Now I know you've got my back!" Seriously )

 

The situation was further complicated by breaking my back in childhood at L5 and the sacrum.

 

I have some recall of the moments before surgery that strike me as if I met my maker, said something in my defense and was sent back. ...but I had so much morphine in me that it was probably just a dream.

 

Clearly, 30-40 years ago a person with a similar probably would have died - or at the very least been paralyzed for the rest of their life. Fortunately, I am learning to learn to walk again.

Edited August 29, 2011 by griz326 (see edit history)

[Cerberus]

Griz,

 

Long time not being around. Very informed view of final arrangements. I know that my own wife would become lost in the process. You and many others are keenly aware of the sensitivity of Chinese, death issues of spouse, life insurance, etc., etc.

 

After 5 years of marriage, my better-half finally acknowledged eventual consquences, for the both of us, and began to openly talk about it, and take steps into the future. Now two wills, w/life insurance, to include final arrangements for both are in place. It only took 5 years. You're advice is dead on target. Other members should discuss this before-hand, and be prepared. Chinese superstitions or not. Beware new and other older members; this is a very serious matter, and they (Chinese) will recoil from the idea as being totally repugnant.

 

There is one thing that you didn't put in your post; D.E.R. (Do Not Resitate). Each state has specific laws in regard to hesitation of a patient, which may have a cardiac rest, resulting from prior hospitilzation. Some states require a caregiver to do everything possible to save a patient. Other states have different laws, and YMMV.

 

My new job requires me to travel to extremely hazardous areas (e.g. Nigeria, Pakistan, Ivory Coast, etc.). Yin and I have discussed it, and I have a built-in DNR order. Yin understands this and knows that I'm unafraid of death. Well! Maybe a little bit! However! I digress from the issue. Yin and I have discussed this issue ahead of time, and after that Griz's information is dead on target.

 

The only issue, which I have NOT discussed with Yin; is kidnap insurance! Yes! VERY real!.

The last job I was on in Nigeria (45 days or so), required a 25 million, kidnap surety bond to be emplaced for each individual team member. The nicest part is that no oil corporation wants to pay. Ergo; each team member generally had one or two "machine-gunned equipped" guards in the immediate area. It was very safe. These guards are nuts. The Nigerian guards we had, need little or no excuse to fire. I have seen death before, but not so balant. These men make the Mexican Zeta cartel look like Girl Scouts.

 

Yes! I carry the necessary paperwork wirh me always. Such are the nessesities of life and death.

 

Dave