Life In America

[SheLikesME?]

Funny about some of you and the shopping carts.

 

One thing I hope some of you noticed is that this thread was started to point out your observations of American's reactions to your Chinese partner. Not that you should or could change your partners behavior. What do you notice? The little things. Also to discuss some of their troubles in coping with us all at home or out.

 

One thing I notice with all people is that if your silent people don't know what your thinking or assume sometimes your stuck up. Heck it might be your simply hard working and don't know the language that well. Mexicans may smile and look you in the eye when they don't know the langauge and working for you. Asians may feel a bit humiliated or something over langauge or just not give a thought to smilling and looking a person in the eye any need to do so. Not logical or something. I am just guessing for stimulation. Think I will go back to work...by all.

[david_dawei]

sometimes my wife will be second in line and go to hand something to the cashier... the cashier and first in line might make a rude face or commment.. I tell her not to worry... that americans cannot do two competent things at one time.. but they can do one required one and one rude one on cue.

 

What I think is missed in the exchange is that the american cannot think how to be more efficient... we trend to be serial rather than parallel in our actions... FIFO is not efficient but is the most common approach of many workers.

 

Because the chinese don't always follow FIFO, they get things done faster too..

 

Look at traffic... those "weaving" in and out of traffic are a pain in the ass, but more cars will get from A-B by this than a steady stream of FIFO traffic...

[Randy W]

sometimes my wife will be second in line and go to hand something to the cashier... the cashier and first in line might make a rude face or commment.. I tell her not to worry... that americans cannot do two competent things at one time.. but they can do one required one and one rude one on cue.

 

What I think is missed in the exchange is that the american cannot think how to be more efficient... we trend to be serial rather than parallel in our actions... FIFO is not efficient but is the most common approach of many workers.

 

Because the chinese don't always follow FIFO, they get things done faster too..

 

Look at traffic... those "weaving" in and out of traffic are a pain in the ass, but more cars will get from A-B by this than a steady stream of FIFO traffic...

 

 

But cashiers learn to not do that so they don't end up short at the end of the day - rule # 1.

[david_dawei]

sometimes my wife will be second in line and go to hand something to the cashier... the cashier and first in line might make a rude face or commment.. I tell her not to worry... that americans cannot do two competent things at one time.. but they can do one required one and one rude one on cue.

 

What I think is missed in the exchange is that the american cannot think how to be more efficient... we trend to be serial rather than parallel in our actions... FIFO is not efficient but is the most common approach of many workers.

 

Because the chinese don't always follow FIFO, they get things done faster too..

 

Look at traffic... those "weaving" in and out of traffic are a pain in the ass, but more cars will get from A-B by this than a steady stream of FIFO traffic...

 

 

But cashiers learn to not do that so they don't end up short at the end of the day - rule # 1.

maybe... CYA rules trumps many practical or efficient issues

[Feathers268]

Hey I thought the Chinese treated each other better and warmer in China than we do each other here in the USA.

From what I've seen I would think different. Being a foriener, people would say hello to me but I wouldn't see the same response amongst each other.

Also, when I saw a man physically slap his girlfriend in the face, people would look the other way as if nothing happened. Here in most cases someone would have stepped in. Also, most of us have an extremely limited view of China and have been sheltered from the "bad" areas. You might not have to worry about being shot, but I'm sure there are places you would certainly fear for your safety.

As for this being stricktly "Chinese", many of these traits are alive and well in the US and Europe.

[kangjie]

Hey I thought the Chinese treated each other better and warmer in China than we do each other here in the USA.

From what I've seen I would think different. Being a foriener, people would say hello to me but I wouldn't see the same response amongst each other.

Also, when I saw a man physically slap his girlfriend in the face, people would look the other way as if nothing happened. Here in most cases someone would have stepped in. Also, most of us have an extremely limited view of China and have been sheltered from the "bad" areas. You might not have to worry about being shot, but I'm sure there are places you would certainly fear for your safety.

As for this being stricktly "Chinese", many of these traits are alive and well in the US and Europe.

Where are these places that I would fear for my safety ? I'm talking about from the chinese citizen not the government.

Does china have an equivalent of St louis or Camden or Detroit ?

America is 24th on the muder per capita. China is not on the list

http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_mur_...ders-per-capita

Edited March 5, 2007 by kangjie (see edit history)

[Joanne]

sometimes my wife will be second in line and go to hand something to the cashier... the cashier and first in line might make a rude face or commment.. I tell her not to worry... that americans cannot do two competent things at one time.. but they can do one required one and one rude one on cue.

 

What I think is missed in the exchange is that the american cannot think how to be more efficient... we trend to be serial rather than parallel in our actions... FIFO is not efficient but is the most common approach of many workers.

 

Because the chinese don't always follow FIFO, they get things done faster too..

 

Look at traffic... those "weaving" in and out of traffic are a pain in the ass, but more cars will get from A-B by this than a steady stream of FIFO traffic...

 

Agreed! Even though I am not sure if you are humoring us.

 

I often could not help pushing my things even though another person is being served by the cashier. I was not trying to get in front of that other person, but subconciously felt that there are better things for the cashier to do than just standing there waiting for something to happen (for example the price being checked by another worker, etc.).

 

If fact, in China, in the similar situation, most cashiers would start processing the next in line while waiting for the other's result.

 

About this efficiency, there are many management theory/methods invented by Americans on how to carry out tasks efficiently. However, not many people think in such terms. Which remind me of a Chinese elementary school test question:

 

There is a 11 inch by 8 inch retangular shaped plywood (or metal, cardboard, whatever) sheet. You will need to cut out circles with 3 inch diameter. How many circles can you get from this sheet?

 

In reality, when my hubby and I were carrying out a project, facing a similar question as above, his reaction is to get a saw and start cutting one by one, while my reaction is to arrange and draw them out before cutting. I observed the difference and thought it all made sense. To my hubby, time is money. On the other hand, our Chinese live on limited resources, we of course have to plan carefully to reduce waste.

[Dennis143]

Hey I thought the Chinese treated each other better and warmer in China than we do each other here in the USA.

From what I've seen I would think different. Being a foriener, people would say hello to me but I wouldn't see the same response amongst each other.

Also, when I saw a man physically slap his girlfriend in the face, people would look the other way as if nothing happened. Here in most cases someone would have stepped in. Also, most of us have an extremely limited view of China and have been sheltered from the "bad" areas. You might not have to worry about being shot, but I'm sure there are places you would certainly fear for your safety.

As for this being stricktly "Chinese", many of these traits are alive and well in the US and Europe.

Where are these places that I would fear for my safety ? I'm talking about from the chinese citizen not the government.

Does china have an equivalent of St louis or Camden or Detroit ?

America is 24th on the muder per capita. China is not on the list

http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_mur_...ders-per-capita

I seriously doubt that, because China is not on some murder LIST, China doesn't rank as high. I can only guess (and, of course, these are merely assumptions, so you can buy what you want with it ) that the Chinese gov't doesn't need murders published nor made public, as they are not an open society about those things. Best keep things, like the killing of first born girls or deformed babies or muders in general hush, hush.

 

There was an area in GZ where I walked with my lady at night passing young thugs who followed behind and along side me (she seeming oblivious to it) while holding and swing metal pipes in an act of indimidation. The act worked real well. Never walked so fast in my life.

[Dan R]

Stairways in apartment buildings can be dangerous. A friend warned me to be careful going up to there apartment. Someone had been knifed and robbed a few days earlier.

 

Similar to our school murders China has experienced similar. During one visit there were several copy cat attacks at schools on school children by adult males. They had grievances with the parents about jobs and politics. The children were easy targets.

 

This is not about culture or a country. It can happen anywhere.

 

There was a time when my family left the back door unlocked so neighbors could lean in to talk. It wasn't even locked when we were out. This was in several Eastern and Midwestern states. Now would anyone forget to lock up?

 

When I first started visiting Japan many of my friends' homes had paper front doors with no lock. Today they have metal doors double locked.

[Joanne]

Stairways in apartment buildings can be dangerous. A friend warned me to be careful going up to there apartment. Someone had been knifed and robbed a few days earlier.

 

Similar to our school murders China has experienced similar. During one visit there were several copy cat attacks at schools on school children by adult males. They had grievances with the parents about jobs and politics. The children were easy targets.

 

This is not about culture or a country. It can happen anywhere.

 

There was a time when my family left the back door unlocked so neighbors could lean in to talk. It wasn't even locked when we were out. This was in several Eastern and Midwestern states. Now would anyone forget to lock up?

 

When I first started visiting Japan many of my friends' homes had paper front doors with no lock. Today they have metal doors double locked.

 

My parents in law live in WA. Eight years ago, they didn't lock their door when they go out. Now they do. However, locking the door merely serves to tell people that nobody is at home. It would not stop burglars because the nearest neighbor is 1/4 mile away.

[kenshin77]

sometimes my wife will be second in line and go to hand something to the cashier... the cashier and first in line might make a rude face or commment.. I tell her not to worry... that americans cannot do two competent things at one time.. but they can do one required one and one rude one on cue.

 

What I think is missed in the exchange is that the american cannot think how to be more efficient... we trend to be serial rather than parallel in our actions... FIFO is not efficient but is the most common approach of many workers.

 

Because the chinese don't always follow FIFO, they get things done faster too..

 

Look at traffic... those "weaving" in and out of traffic are a pain in the ass, but more cars will get from A-B by this than a steady stream of FIFO traffic...

 

Agreed! Even though I am not sure if you are humoring us.

 

I often could not help pushing my things even though another person is being served by the cashier. I was not trying to get in front of that other person, but subconciously felt that there are better things for the cashier to do than just standing there waiting for something to happen (for example the price being checked by another worker, etc.).

 

If fact, in China, in the similar situation, most cashiers would start processing the next in line while waiting for the other's result.

 

About this efficiency, there are many management theory/methods invented by Americans on how to carry out tasks efficiently. However, not many people think in such terms. Which remind me of a Chinese elementary school test question:

 

There is a 11 inch by 8 inch retangular shaped plywood (or metal, cardboard, whatever) sheet. You will need to cut out circles with 3 inch diameter. How many circles can you get from this sheet?

 

In reality, when my hubby and I were carrying out a project, facing a similar question as above, his reaction is to get a saw and start cutting one by one, while my reaction is to arrange and draw them out before cutting. I observed the difference and thought it all made sense. To my hubby, time is money. On the other hand, our Chinese live on limited resources, we of course have to plan carefully to reduce waste.

 

Nah, things are completely different in individual's perspective, to me, as a Chinese girl who's been to the states, Canada and now living in China, my own point of view is:

 

Canada : Peaceful, Boring, Lazy, Cold (Well, except Vancouver)

U.S.: Comfortable, Relax, Aggressive, Boring

China : Crowded, Energetic, Fun, SAFE

 

When I use SAFE here, I actually mean SAFER than U.S. I don't really have to worry about carrying a DV on my hand getting robbed walking on a street in NYC or DETRIOT or any of THOSE places~ I don't really have to worry about having a lot of CASH in my pocket, sometimes I just dont like to use Cards~ There do have people they SEEM to follow you around, I've experienced this before at night time in Shanghai, However, at the end, I found thats just b'coz of myself being extremely suspicious always. o_O

 

If my BF ever speaks Chinese, I'd rather us living in China. Anyways, We still plan to move back in the future. ^.-

 

Yuki~

Edited March 5, 2007 by kenshin77 (see edit history)

[SheLikesME?]

More of my soap opera:

 

I forgot to add about my Mom calling my wife a shrew after a few days, because of the way she would talk to me sometimes. That dust on top of the bar in the closet where cloths hangers go was a real tense situation But she also likes my wife, as she gets hugs and given the proper attention and care needed.

 

Mom told me today that my wife said something to her about claiming the kitchen. From what I know of my wife I think she meant she would do some cooking as my MOm was doing most of it the first week or two. Wife was so wore out when she arrived that she rested for several days then she got into her left over homework. Geeze 2 huge studies on campanies or an industry. The reports were much more extensive than I ever do. She should do this then play the stock market if you ask me. Or work for some outfit who invests. Anyway once past the homework she did get in the kitchen, then we traveled and brought home the chinese food, and she took the kitchen over. Mom just could not eat any of it though.

 

Anyway I understand her choice of words. To someone new like my Mom she took it wrong at first and wanted to throw a whole skillet of food in her face, she said, but she decided not to and just work this out. Mom says wife is very kind to her. So I think wife uses terms or phrases that just don't translate well to New folk.

Edited March 5, 2007 by SheLikesME? (see edit history)

[Feathers268]

Hey I thought the Chinese treated each other better and warmer in China than we do each other here in the USA.

From what I've seen I would think different. Being a foriener, people would say hello to me but I wouldn't see the same response amongst each other.

Also, when I saw a man physically slap his girlfriend in the face, people would look the other way as if nothing happened. Here in most cases someone would have stepped in. Also, most of us have an extremely limited view of China and have been sheltered from the "bad" areas. You might not have to worry about being shot, but I'm sure there are places you would certainly fear for your safety.

As for this being stricktly "Chinese", many of these traits are alive and well in the US and Europe.

Where are these places that I would fear for my safety ? I'm talking about from the chinese citizen not the government.

Does china have an equivalent of St louis or Camden or Detroit ?

America is 24th on the muder per capita. China is not on the list

http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_mur_...ders-per-capita

Others have stated similar to this, you must remember that China's media is state run and therefore what is not atractive does't air. Many times Jen made sure I had a better control of my wallet while in China because, as she put it,"people here no good". That is something here I've never worried about even in Oakland which can rank right up there in crime. Wether you want to admit it or not, there is murder, rape, theft, and so on in China as well. Just because it is not reported, does not mean it doesn't exist.

[kenshin77]

Hey I thought the Chinese treated each other better and warmer in China than we do each other here in the USA.

From what I've seen I would think different. Being a foriener, people would say hello to me but I wouldn't see the same response amongst each other.

Also, when I saw a man physically slap his girlfriend in the face, people would look the other way as if nothing happened. Here in most cases someone would have stepped in. Also, most of us have an extremely limited view of China and have been sheltered from the "bad" areas. You might not have to worry about being shot, but I'm sure there are places you would certainly fear for your safety.

As for this being stricktly "Chinese", many of these traits are alive and well in the US and Europe.

Where are these places that I would fear for my safety ? I'm talking about from the chinese citizen not the government.

Does china have an equivalent of St louis or Camden or Detroit ?

America is 24th on the muder per capita. China is not on the list

http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_mur_...ders-per-capita

Others have stated similar to this, you must remember that China's media is state run and therefore what is not atractive does't air. Many times Jen made sure I had a better control of my wallet while in China because, as she put it,"people here no good". That is something here I've never worried about even in Oakland which can rank right up there in crime. Wether you want to admit it or not, there is murder, rape, theft, and so on in China as well. Just because it is not reported, does not mean it doesn't exist.

 

Just my two cents, from the over 20 years living in China, I always can see the news on TV or anytype of media reporting Murder, Rape, or other Crimes. Theres certain TV show each day on different channels showing the crimes to prevent people from being harmed again. This is completely OPEN to ME. Yes, to ME, to Chinese.

 

You don't see it being reported, doesn't mean it must exist~

 

Perhaps when your wife saying *Here is no good* I believe its good to be careful like that SOMETIMES, and most of the Chinese act that way too in some Certain places, same rules applied in the States as well. I believe walking at the river bund side in Shanghai is as nice as walking in some sort of place you consider safe in the U.S.

 

Theres an proverb in China, Nothing is absolute.

 

Jumping to another topic, during a survey of the Chinese who has been to U.S, its not hard to find out that in our eyes, U.S. is comfortable for Retirement, but China is definitely the heaven for energetic people who have the young hearts~.

 

Yuki~

@Shanghai

Edited March 6, 2007 by kenshin77 (see edit history)

[david_dawei]

made sure I had a better control of my wallet while in China because, as she put it,"people here no good".

In almost a dozen cities in six months.. I was never told to worry about my wallet.

 

I wonder if she would give that warning to a chinese friend visiting her, or only to a western visiting? If the latter only, then maybe she's too sensitive to what a 'foreigner might want to hear'...