Is xmas only for kids?

[Urkidding]

I am chinese woman, so I understand her feelings. It is definitely not greedy, it is just so called "spoiled". I got presents from my husband when I was in China. but now I am in the US I didnt get my chrismas present. I got my birthday gift a necklace which is 4 days before christmas. Honestly I dont care about christmas gift, I just made sure we had enough gifts for kids. My husband asked me what I wanted to get on christmas,he wanted a rasor now. and we decided to buy them after christams, as the price would be cheapter based on what my husband said

 

Great Wife! - Smart Husband

[Rakkasan]

What I wanted is some little present like candy or flower, I want to know that he cares, he will do something(absolutly not necessarily costly) to make me happy. Is that can be called" greedy"? I want the feeling of being loved, is that too much to ask?

I do not consider you as being greedy. Zhen sent me a Christmas card and that was all the present I needed from her. I was pleased that even though she doesn't understand our Christmas, me took the time to purchase a simple card and mail it early in the month. Your SO could have done the same for you, it is not a big expense and it shows that he is thinking about you.

 

I do not know what kind of relationship you two have, but based on what you have said he seems a bit defensive about money. This may just be because of the stories about some women trying to take advantage of American men financially.

 

As others have said, he may not be a gift giving kind of guy, but a card is a simple expression of ones feeling. I think they are very important for any relationship, but especially so in the type of long distance relationships that we are dealing with.

Edited December 30, 2006 by Rakkasan (see edit history)

[bosco]

My Ling bought me red long-johns to wear when I come for Spring Festival. She showed me my present on xmas morning (webcam). I think this might be my best xmas present ever.

Edited December 30, 2006 by Ling-Curt (see edit history)

[Urkidding]

My Ling bought me red long-johns to wear when I come for Spring Festival. She showed me my present on xmas morning (webcam). I think this might be my best xmas present ever.

 

You'll need them too where you are going!

[ameriken]

I was not sure what we would do for Christmas since it was not her tradition. But after putting up lights, a tree, as well as taking her on a 90 minute 'tour' to see the lights in other neighborhoods, I could see she was getting in the spirit. I asked her if she wanted to do the tradition of exchanging gifts and she happily agreed.

 

We wrote a list of things we both wanted, went to the mall and did some window shopping, and then separated to buy one or more of the gifts on our lists for each other. She suggested a $50 limit. We came back, wrapped the gifts, and then opened them on Christmas eve.

 

It was exciting to see the smile on her face. Such a simple concept can bring such joy and excitement as well as another thing we were able to do together.

[bosco]

My Ling bought me red long-johns to wear when I come for Spring Festival. She showed me my present on xmas morning (webcam). I think this might be my best xmas present ever.

 

You'll need them too where you are going!

 

yup! -12¡ãC (10¡ãF) there at this moment. But that's not so bad. Really cold is once you get below -20¡ãF. As a climber, I've experienced temps down to -50¡ãF with high winds--I have no idea what the chill factor was but I know when you have waterbottles inside your pack that have frozen solid, it's pretty damn cold out.

[Feathers268]

I have another possibility on this. 2004 was a Christmas that was hard for me. Having thought foolishly that Jen would have been here (before learning the true visa time), I was really down because the only thing I wanted was to have her here with me. I had sent her something but then her Birthday is at the biginning of the month so things just got sent together. I also had purchased gifts for her after the holiday and wrapped them to be put aside until she was here.

I'm not saying this is what is going on, but Christmas is about family and being together. When you are apart, it is felt even more so than at any other time of the year. Hearing a request for gifts might have just come across the wrong way. Not that you are bad but that he is feeling alone and his emotions surfaced a little.

[Dennis143]

I tease Leiqin that I gave her a car for Christmas and she gave me trouble.

 

I know this is off topic, as the topic is about Xmas and that's that other celebration that coincides with Christ's birth. You know the one where you feel pressured to buy everyone some crappy gift knowing that they'll do the same as you do when you take your boxed set of decorated with Xmas holly coffee mugs home. Xmas is that time of year that you dread, as you know that it's not really a time of meaning nor joy, but just pressure. No, Xmas ain't for kids, but Christ mas is for everyone.

Edited December 31, 2006 by Dennis143 (see edit history)

[bosco]

You weren't Scrooge in a past life were you?

[Dennis143]

You weren't Scrooge in a past life were you?

Neither in a past life nor this one.

[Rakkasan]

I also think you should discuss with him what U.S. holidays he celebrates and how they are celebrated. Although I am all for celebrating Chinese holidays as much as possible given the limited participation in my area, I think it would be a good idea for any wife coming to the U.S. to assimilate by being introduced to American holidays like ameriken did.

[bosco]

I also think you should discuss with him what U.S. holidays he celebrates and how they are celebrated. Although I am all for celebrating Chinese holidays as much as possible given the limited participation in my area, I think it would be a good idea for any wife coming to the U.S. to assimilate by being introduced to American holidays like ameriken did.

 

Agreed. Although it will be more expensive and much more crowded, I am going to visit Ling for Spring Festival because I think it is important to experience her important holidays and traditions, not just know about them.

[sleepless in Houston&CQ]

Meimei,I understand your feeling. But I don't think it is right to ask for a gift.That will make your SO feel bad.He would think you cares about the gifts more than him. As a woman,I'm agree with you that the little gifts shows the loves and cares for each others. but did you buy anything for him? I believe there is another way more skilled to remind him show his special love for you on the special day. hehehe, seems it takes time to train a man.

I remember I bought perfume for my husband in 2005 Christmas at that time we were apart. He sent me greeting cards. This year,we spent Christmas together in China. I mentioned the gifts. but he said we didn't have Christmas in China. and plus we have received the best gift from the US government....the VISA. This didn't bother me. I can buy anything I want by myself and plus my husband has applied American credit card for me.and he has showed his loves for me all the time. I have nothing to complain about.

Please don't bother yourself by this tiny things. Happy New Year! I'm sending you a warm hug for your new year gift.

Emma

Edited December 31, 2006 by sleepless in Houston&CQ (see edit history)

[Dennis143]

I'm sending you a warm hug for your new year gift.

Emma

Now THAT is the best gift that I could ever receive, Emma. Bobby is a very lucky man, as I am sure he is fully aware.

 

Happy New Year to you too.

[LeeFisher3]

We must keep in mind that the tradition of Christmas is viewed differently around the world and by various religions. I think SinoTexas said it best for many in the US, a day for Christians to commemorate the birth of Jesus Christ. Most scholars both biblical and secular will confirm that December doesn't fit the recorded history when trying to pinpoint his birth date.

 

Probably one of the most objective historical descriptions of the Christmas holiday can be found at History of Christmas by the History Channel.

 

Culture and tradition have played major roles in defining this holiday's observance but the origin of the Christian observance came in the fourth century by Pope Julius I who chose December 25. By holding Christmas at the same time as traditional winter solstice festivals, church leaders increased the chances that Christmas would be popularly embraced, but gave up the ability to dictate how it was celebrated. This has lead to the merging of the different celebrations and traditions that surrounded the winter solstice.

 

Washington Irving also played a major role in defining Christmas as we know it today, just as he has managed to rewrite the history of Columbus by saying ole Chris was trying to prove we world was round, a fact that had been proved quite some time before. But then Irving managed to see a bunch of books and change history in the process.

 

Pop culture plays a large role in how things are viewed, in spite of the facts.