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I will try this for many know my english no good. me now together here with cfl 5 year now. I am Chongqing girl. I meet my husband (nuworld) on internet in 2005. we chat on email only for one year. my husband decide to come to chongqing and visit me in 2006 for two week. we marry each other for it feel right. (my family very no happy) husband go home to america and take care of visa papers. he send k3 and cr1 together. one year and one day after marriage book we go for interview for k3 visa. during interview no questions asked only man in window say you visa changed to cr1 and give my blue paper. blue paper say need medicine shots. i get question taken care of same day of interview and try to get visa again. man in window say wait 90 days and then we give you visa. 90 days now all gone and i have visa. my husband can not be with me for travel to america for his work to busy. i must travel alone to new country. for me this no problem for me smart girl. husband buy me airplane ticket and i arrive in american on 08/27/2008 at first i find america very difficult to understand but i learn fast. for first few week i stay at home and fix it for more liking for both of us. then my husband get me job at his company. that was 6 years ago and me still work at same company and make good money. we now have 8 years marriage book together. new house, new car with no payment and a new house in chongqing. visa very difficult to get but every people get visa. maybe take longer for some to get but feel good latter when get visa. america is good to me but me still miss china. though my life in china small no good as younger girl me still miss my land. our marriage book together is very good and me feel will last forever.

Hi Everyone, I am Ruby, I am from Liaoning Province, I came to the US in January, 2010 through K-1 Visa, and got married in MS. Before I came to the US, I was a student in College, I have never worked in China. I started working for an office under SSA since November, 2010, I really enjoy helping people who are in need, especially the ones who are grateful. I always take my time listening to their concerns when they call, and try to answer their questions with my best ability, sometimes I feel like I would make a good therapist, I can understand how stressful it must be for people who go through medical illness and financial problems. On weekends, My husband and I volunteer at a local animal shelter, I mostly help with their event, we transport several dogs and cats to local PetSmart/PetCo for adoption, and a lot of them get adopted faster than being at the shelter. When I first started volunteering in 2011, I always want to bring all of them home at the end of day if they are not adopted...but over the years, my husband said it seems I am not as emotional as before...the truth is that I know I can't take them all home...and I will continue do my part to help them find a good home. I rescued my dog from the shelter three years ago, she was found walking on the street by a police officer, he took her to the shelter, after they examined her, they found out she was pregnant, however, none of her puppies survived due to her poor health. When I first saw her, she was in her kennel trying to hide her food under the newspaper, I felt so sad. I got her out of kennel to spend some time with her, she couldn't stop trembling, I felt so sorry for her, especially after hearing she recently lost her babies. My husband and I took her home that day. She didn't have a name when we adopted her because she was a stray, my mother-in-law named her "Sugar" because she is snowwhite and sweet. Now Sugar is very spoiled by both my husband and I, she always jump in bed when I get in bed even though she has her own comfortable bed, it seems she just wants to get close to us. My husband and I are expecting our first baby in January, 2015. I hope Sugar will not feel left out, and love the baby as much as we love her.

Congrats to you and your husband, Ruby. Being a parent is a great responsibility but a huge blessing. My wife Li was unable to spend the traditional month in bed and we had no help with the baby when Salina was born ten years ago. All of Li's family is in China and we had only been back in the States for a little over a year when she was born. I have no family except for my father, who is 93 and lives in Florida. To this day, any time Li gets an ache or a pain of any kind, she blames it on not staying in bed for a month.

Want some fashion inspiration? Check out what the ancient Chinese wore throughout history.

Love your story, Ruby! My eyes became watery reading how you adopted Sugar. You have such a kind heart, not easy to always be patient to listen... You will be a great mom!! And thank you for moderating this forum.

Thank you for your wonderful story Ruby. I have always owned a dog but when the last one passed away I could not get another one it's just painful. My wife still has her little bed in out bedroom. She just can't bring herself to take it out We will be waiting for some pictures of you and your husbands new arrival. So don't forget. Larry

Kyle, I think this is evidence of the dumbing down of America that started when they passed the laws that everyone would graduate high school. Whoever wrote this up for the our Department Homeland Insecurity jackals probably graduated high school at the 5th grade level. And, he probably got a few gold stars by his name for writing it up. It says we can use our passport as US citizens, or green cards as LPR's. I'm not giving Uncle Sam 2 cents towards getting a drivers license, with a kindergarteners gold star on it, from an agency that should be taken out and shot...LOL...they aren't making anyone secure. I heard somebody (maybe an illegal alien) got a ride on a plane (domestic flight) the other day....and he didn't even have a ticket for the flight. What???? Sounds like TSA workers went to the same high school as the DHS worker. Rawknee

This is not necessarily true, my wife took IELTS not TOEFL and got into a US Grad school(MBA). TOEFL is American English, IELTS is British English, most schools accept both. Various opinions on which one is easier. Earlier, he mentioned she got a 6.5. That is what my wife scored though most people would consider her fluent in English (her weakness especially prior to grad school was written English). My wife did have to take an English preparatory class at her grad school but I think it helped her to understand what her grad school classes would be like.

Bologna, often called "baloney", is not a brand name. It is a type of meat and sometimes comes in a ring. It can also come in a stick, or a slab, or even sliced in a package. Ring Bologna is thus not a brand name. In the pics you posted, the brand name is Cher-Make, the type of meat is bologna, and the shape is a ring. I can see how this can get confusing for recent arrivals. Your example of Kleenex is a great one. Kleenex was most likely the first and most dominant brand of tissue paper.

Good luck Catherine. From our talks I don't see anything standing in your way to be anything that you want to be. You certainly have the intelligence that's for sure. Keep learning as much as you can about the english language that is the key. You already have a handle on that. As you can see from being in the US for 6 months and being on this forum we Americans like to talk with a lot of slang so although it is not proper english it is still important because almost everyone uses it. Good luck Larry

That's a wonderful introduction, Zhenghong. Don't sell yourself short. My wife has been here 13 years and can barely read or write English. :shrug: You run circles around her.

Ken, it was an unplanned "bring your leftovers" party a day or two after Tday, now that I think about it. It was with who is now my ex, but she had been here 1-3 years I think, at that point. I agree with your saying to be slow, of course. I like Ham, not turkey. I only eat turkey out of politeness. Clean floors and slippers. I take off shoes and wear socks or barefooted in the house, usually, not always, in China and the USA. And beware of the dogs ass, even though he cleans it with his medicated tongue. (I still have not asked that cousin to leave her dog home.) Will see what Fen thinks. There I quoted it twice. THAT says a lot. What an admission. Thanks for being so brave. Forget about "face" so much in the USA, I think. I could open up a can of worms in this subject. What I mean is don't try always hide and act over confident all the time. Be yourself.

I will start with myself. "Hello everyone , I'm Joecy". I like the 2nd sister "Jo" in the novel little women, so I picked my English name as Joe, but people say it's a boy's name so, I added "cy". I was born in Chengdu, grew up in Shanghai, worked as Marketing Communication for many years, met my husband through work, got married in Shanghai. In 2012, I arrived in the US in Philadelphia, first half years were full of culture shocks: I didn't know when to say "excuse me" when walking into American's personal bubble, this happened many times in grocery stores; I chased geese and squirrels, which was later defined as "stressing animals" by my husband; Language is hard. On every weekend, I would stop talking, nor English or Chinese, my brain was fried! I was also disconnected from China town and Chinese church, my friendship were all virtual with my friends/family in China. I was frustrated with finding jobs. Through a friend's personal journey, I was inspired to volunteer at a none profit organization for women, while working in a cookie store for part time. The volunteer experience led to my current none profit dream: create a platform to help Chinese immigrant women strive in the US. I produce a bilingual magazine with my own saving. Now the first issue is printed, hope people would like to subscribe, and let me what do you think.The first issue is free. I have 3 girls, two (by marriage) in high school and 1 in elementary, and a male cat to balance the family dynamics. In the US, I found myself cherish Chinese traditions, family and friends, way more than in China; I like to find the differences between US and China, this has becomes the drive for me to learn and grow. CFL is a very special platform. I hope more Chinese women with similar experiences will join us, and feel safe to share here.

If you could just relax and say "yes dear you are right." Then you would reap great rewards. These are truly wise words Cuzin' Charles! It is obvious that you, Grasshopper, have learned your lessons well. One must walk across the rice paper without leaving even the slightest tear or imprint. The answer to the koan is indeed that: "Yes dear, your are right. How stupid of me to think otherwise."