just wondering

[missingher]

I'm not being a jerk i'm just wondering a few things ( i'm in the same boat of most of you ).

well 1st most of the couples i see on here are of fairly young asain women with signifently older men ( more than 10 or 15 years older )!

to be honest i'm not the most handsome guy but a lot of the guys i see here and other sites aer older men balding grey haired and overweight!

and the ladies are extremely attractive.

they could probably get any man they wanted in china or anyway for that matter. i was just wondering if the men really beleive that the woman they are trying to get here really love them or are just trying to get to the USA?

me and my wife have known each other over 2 years now and we have been married now for 6 months?

how long as most of the men on here known the person they are with now? and how many of you met though a site or place specializing in finding a potential mate that are lookng for marriage?

most of those cases are why the immigration is so leary on granting visa's and it actualy makes its alot harder for the rest of us that actualy have a real type of relationship ( known each other for awhile and are not just jumping into a relationship with someone they have never met and get married after only knowing each other for less the 1 week or 1 month)!

i quess i'm kinda getting frustrated for all the crap we have to go through just to get our wifes here it should be easy but many of the cases i mentioned above have messed it up for everyone else!

I also wanted to know how many men on here are repeaters ? meaning how many times have you been ingaged to someone from another country? how many times got married to a woman from another country and got divorced and then within a few months go back to that country and get a new girl to marry?

AND REMEMBER I'M ALSO WAITING FOR MY WIFE TO COME HERE SHE IS IN HONG KONG WORKING. SHE IS NOT FROM CHINA . THANKS

[Jeikun]

1. Cautiously approach hornet's nest

2. Whack it with a stick

3. Run

[mikem]

Well bud I fit some of the examples you mention. I am 20+ years older then my now wife..We met in person when I was in China..on business..01/2001 She then traveled with me for more then 10 days and everything was a go from there.. I met her parents on my second trip who are just a few years older then me..My Lapao is extremly attractive and in her early 30's. She was married once before but no kids to some guy from Tiawan who showed once and she never saw again..Maybe she likes the stability..I have talked to her about the age difference many many times..She wrote me a letter after we met and the words from that letter I will never for get.. "Although we are so far apart and there is a difference in our age and language, Love knows no distance" Oh boy I have never had anyone talk to me this way. I asked a couple of my business associates about this and they did some checking for me and said she is dead serious.. I was trying to figure out what I did to the poor girl to make her feel this way.

I also find that alot of the Chinese ladies like older guys mine says I look like the Boss?? Oh she also calls me baby face you figure that one out.

I had met many when there and still get flirted with when I go to Shanghai I ask my wife not to leave me alone in the stores because of this,, but when I saw and met her-- Take the fork out I'm done.

Chinese guys are well known for their extra caricular activety and this is very common there I have seen this even in my business associates so that may be a reason also.

Also her Dad would Kill her if she screws up.. She knows and has told me that.. Her Mom and Dad Brother and Sister really aprove of me its because she tells them I treat her so kind....3 of her girl friends are in love with me(go figure) she has told me this and when she speaks to the from here on the phone I must talk with them or else..Also maybe they know the older guys are a little more settled and still not trying to sow the old proverbiale oats..

I think a key element of this whole thing is to meet the family and go there as many times as possible before she comes here. I was there 4 times in under two years prior to her coming here. And even after being here I would ask her if she still wanted to get married. The answer was always in the affirmative. Saw most of the sights and always had a great time. The Chinese folks a very curious about westerners.

I am very settled person and make an excellent living.. She does not have to work but wants to. When I say why. She says she wants to send Mama and Papa some money every month.. I offered to give her money to do this be she frowns and says to me this is your money not my money..I cease arguing at that point. She loves it here and has met several Chinese ladies here who are from Tiawain/Shanghai and Ningbo/Nanning. In fact the gal from Tiawain is her age and asked us over for Turkey dinner on Christmas her husband is from Scotland and she has been here for 5 years. My Lapoa treats me better then my own Mother did..I am spoiled rotten. Of course I treat her very well she goes to all the company parties with me. At this years Christmas party she was the hit of the party she wore a Red and gold Chipai from GZ..everone had to meet her. One of the guys I work with we are pretty close said she looked like a China doll. Also my Lapoa is very domesticated she cooks keeps house etc. and loves all the appliances we have here wait till yours finds out you have a dryer in the house.. the others here will tell you the same.. Mainly go there and check things out as much as you can and take it from there your heart will answer your questions.

[Guest love]

AND REMEMBER I'M ALSO WAITING FOR MY WIFE TO COME HERE SHE IS IN HONG KONG WORKING. SHE IS NOT FROM CHINA . THANKS

HK is belong to China. it's just a city of China.

[lele]

AND REMEMBER I'M ALSO WAITING FOR MY WIFE TO COME HERE SHE IS IN HONG KONG WORKING. SHE IS NOT FROM CHINA .   THANKS

HK is belong to China. it's just a city of China.

just a SAR (special administrative region). but yes, it is china in all aspects that matter, and will be fully integrated in under 45 years, with the cities of HK and SZ effectively becoming one large city.

[MoonCarolCafe]

1. Cautiously approach hornet's nest

2. Whack it with a stick

3. Run

 

Some people just can't resist testing a pointy stick on a sleeping grizzly.

[MoonCarolCafe]

I'm going to answer your post point by point. A bit of background before I begin:

 

I'm 7 years older than my wife. When I met her I was an anti-mainlander-Chinese bigot. Initially my wife wanted nothing to do with me, it was I who did all the chasing. My wife would have been quite happy for me to move to China (she wants to stay in HK or SH) instead of her coming to the USA.

 

well 1st most of the couples i see on here are of fairly young asain women with signifently older men ( more than 10 or 15 years older )!

to be honest i'm not the most handsome guy but a lot of the guys i see here and other sites aer older men balding grey haired and overweight!

and the ladies are extremely attractive.

(Are the women young, or do they just look younger?) I have news for you... most American men (including yours truly) are overweight. Most single American men with the economic ability to make multiple trips to China are going to be older rather than younger. Older men are more likely to be balding, and/or have grey hair. Due to cultural differences wide differences in age between husband and wife are not quite the issue it might be in Poughkipsie.

 

they could probably get any man they wanted in china or anyway for that matter. i was just wondering if the men really beleive that the woman they are trying to get here really love them or are just trying to get to the USA?

If they could really get any man in China, why would they settle for a middle-class American when they can have a millionaire Chinese real-estate magnate? Would you settle for less if you could have more?

 

me and my wife have known each other over 2 years now and we have been married now for 6 months?

how long as most of the men on here known the person they are with now? and how many of you met though a site or place specializing in finding a potential mate that are lookng for marriage?

Immaterial. It does not matter where/how a couple met. The actions AFTER a couple meets are germane, but I would never say it's a sham marriage based on them meeting on a site... dedicated to hooking up American men who want to meet Chinese women with Chinese women who want to meet American men. SOME of these are shams, but I would never accuse all of them of being so.

 

most of those cases are why the immigration is so leary on granting visa's and it actualy makes its alot harder for the rest of us that actualy have a real type of relationship ( known each other for awhile and are not just jumping into a relationship with someone they have never met and get married after only knowing each other for less the 1 week or 1 month)!

i quess i'm kinda getting frustrated for all the crap we have to go through just to get our wifes here it should be easy but many of the cases i mentioned above have messed it up for everyone else!

Really? That's the reason? Because earlier this year I had a chance to speak with a man who had just transferred out of the visa office, and he indicated otherwise.

 

I also wanted to know how many men on here are repeaters ? meaning how many times have you been ingaged to someone from another country? how many times got married to a woman from another country and got divorced and then within a few months go back to that country and get a new girl to marry?

IIRC if you get divorced in a few months, she has to go back unless she can prove spousal abuse. And if you are in jail for spousal abuse, you are not going anywhere to marry anyone.

 

AND REMEMBER I'M ALSO WAITING FOR MY WIFE TO COME HERE SHE IS IN HONG KONG WORKING. SHE IS NOT FROM CHINA . THANKS

Petitions for marriages in HK take less time to process than petitions for marriages in China. I you married her in HK you'll be going through a different office than those of us who married in China, and so our shenanigans will have little impact on you.

[warpedbored]

He said she in HK working and is not from China. There are many women working in HK from the Phillipines for example so it was not neccessarily an error on who HK belongs to.

[Larry & Meirong]

My wife just turned 36. I am 57. I was concerned about her love for me too, but I now feel more certain of her love. She has proved it to me several times and in several ways. I think love has to be tested to find out how strong it is. We have had several disagreements, and they have helped me to confirm that she is committed to me. On my first trip to China I had dinner with her family, and was welcomed in a way that was very wonderful. They are as dear to me as my family.

 

I think that Chinese women exhibit a type of love and outlook on life that is indicative of America 50 or 60 years ago. I also think they value age and the wisdom (hopefully) that sometimes comes with age.

 

Should you be skeptical? Probably. Once you have satisfied that skepticism, sit back and enjoy the treasure you found in "Red China".

 

By the way, you are exhibiting a trait which may be purely american. We like to judge/pre judge people. "You are handsome, and You are not handsome". Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and I think maybe Chinese women are much more discerning in their evaluations. I do not consider myself anything special, but my wife does, and that is all that matters to me.

 

I will edit this post later when I have more time.

[Razbre]

Why you young little whipper snapper!!!!! (just joking...)

Yunling is 36...I'm 52....known her for over a year now...when her interview comes up Jan 11th...it will be my 4th trip over...does she love me? you bet she does...loves me for me...for the way I treat her with respect, dignity and class...

Can she get better? lol...she says no....never...had given up on allllllll men as being dirt bags...

and WHY would ANY woman....unless led to believe that the streets of the US are gold....give up family...job...everything they have worked for...to come to the US where no matter what their education...has to start from scratch.

You say you have known you lady for over 2 years...and married for 6 months...in all that time...how long have you 'physically' been togeather? 1 month? 2 months? 3 months time?

[tywy_99]

is my better half for real?................Ohhhhh yeahhhhhhhh.......

 

trying to teach her how to drive!....and it don't get no more real than that!!!....

[raineedaze]

When I decided to find a asian woman to spend the rest of my life with I did so because the american women have been very dissapointing. I was tired of spending my time with a woman that I thought would be there until the end just to find out that they decided the grass might be greener elsewhere. I know that the asian woman is a very sincere and loving person that when she is treated good will be there unconditionally and will always make her husband feel special. My wife is 46 and I am 54, that is not a big age difference. That is exactly what I went searching for because I did not want to fall in love with someone I could not have until the day I died. Age does not make the successful marriage but it can destroy a marriage if the difference in interests are too great.

 

I have watched my wife fall deeper and deeper in love with me as I have with her. I have watched the progression of this over the past year and my trips to china. I have no doubt of my wife's love for me because I have watched it and felt it progress. It did not come emediately but it did come completely. I have had many meals with her family as well and they are wonderful people. They also agree and give us their blessing. I believe that we must go into this with our eyes open. You can go find a beautiful young woman in china that will be willing to move to the usa. You can also bury your head in the sand and believe that it will be wonderful. I think you should keep your eyes wide open and see what happens to her and to you. Look for the happiness in her heart as well as her smile. We all know love and what it looks like and how it makes us feel. You should be able to see this in her if it is indeed there. Understand that they want to come here, of course they will be happy. Just be honest with yourself and look for the progression of love and watch it build. You will have no doubts then.

 

Good Luck to all of you. The process we must go through to accomplish this is extreme and we deserve the happiness when we get her here.

[missingher]

i said my wife is not from china or hong kong she is just in hk working!

we got married in hong kong so that is where the process as to take place!~! gald to see so many replies! but not to many replied stating if they were in a relationship i had mentioned the post!

[missingher]

to WARPEDBORED you are correct that is what i said and yes my wife is also a filipina!

[Rick-Guohua]

HI, All, Happy New Year

I'm sorry, I have been kinda busy, Got hurt at work, Just got out of the Hospital and home.

 

I read this post and wanted to give my 2 cents.

 

I wasn't looking for an Asian wife or any wife, I was looking locally for dates on AmericanSingles... Got an e-mail from a Beautiful Woman from China,,, Answered and wrote to each other for a very long time and spoke on the phone to her.

I asked, Why me? You've seen my picture, I'm No PRIZE! ( I'm 6 foot and 230lbs and I'm an Old Biker, Beer belly and scares,, Yes I still ride)

Her answer,,, You look nice and I like what you say in your profile, You sound very honest, Chinese man No Honest, Many Bad Habits, No take care of wife, Have many women. I don't want an other Chinese man.

Guohua, My S.O. was 38 then and I was 49. Now I'm 50 soon to be 51.

I can tell you honestly, I have never been treated better in my life by any woman. Like many of our friends here have stated to you. You treat your lady with respect and you are always honest and most importantly you always try to understand her,,, You have a loyal, Loving, Careing Lady, That I believe to this day, Will take care of me, When I am Really Old and Gray.

The first time we meet, I said, Ok, You've really seen me, You have seen my belly from years of drinking,,, What do you think, I'm fat aren't I?

No, No, Your not fat,, My Rick,,,No,, Your Healthy, Your happy and your a good man. But you no need to smoke. Ok? Come my father wants to meet you....

Now the rest of the Story...... Yes, I Love My S.O. More than this world,,, More than My Harley???????? Yea, Ok...