Hock, Spit, Splash, Drip

[Guest ExChinaExpat]

I know it won't do any good to complain about this. I have adjusted to many of the cultural differences in China, but there are a few that continue to send shivers up my spine.

 

1. Hock spit. This is the loud sound made by someone hocking up a lugie, without regard to who may be standing right in front of them.

 

2. Spitting. Most everyone spits, but Western people tend to do it privately. In China, you will see lugies hocked up and spat on the floor while you're in an elevator, standing taking a piss, spit in the wastebasket anywhere, and also in the ashtray that others use.

 

3. Splashing. Bathrooms have sinks, toilets, and showers. But, for Chinese, it is very difficult for them to keep the water in the sink or drain. Users learn not to lean against the sink counter top, because there is a large pool of water living there. Don't bother to squeegee it off, because it will be filled with water again from the next user.

 

4. Drip. Maybe it is because of shorter sausages, but there is usually more piss on the floor in front of the toilet or urinal than ends up inside it. No soap, no towels, and no disinfecting procedure to clean whatever ends up on your shoes. And you wondered why Chinese people take off their shoes in the house.

 

Chinese drivers still bother me, but I do my best to avoid them. I know they will be driving on the sidewalks and the wrong way on the roads. I can look and prepare for them most of the time.

Edited February 23, 2012 by JiangsuExpat (see edit history)

[RobertH]

Lol this dose not bother me. I however can understand why it would bother you. I have actually found it nice on the occation I need to harvest a lunge oyster and send it to market that my wife dose not give me a look like I am gross.

[dnoblett]

Lol this dose not bother me. I however can understand why it would bother you. I have actually found it nice on the occation I need to harvest a lunge oyster and send it to market that my wife dose not give me a look like I am gross.

Oh my wife would have issue with that.

[tsap seui]

I know it won't do any good to complain about this. I have adjusted to many of the cultural differences in China, but there are a few that continue to send shivers up my spine.

 

1. Hock spit. This is the loud sound made by someone hocking up a lugie, without regard to who may be standing right in front of them.

 

2. Spitting. Most everyone spits, but Western people tend to do it privately. In China, you will see lugies hocked up and spat on the floor while you're in an elevator, standing taking a piss, spit in the wastebasket anywhere, and also in the ashtray that others use.

 

3. Splashing. Bathrooms have sinks, toilets, and showers. But, for Chinese, it is very difficult for them to keep the water in the sink or drain. Users learn not to lean against the sink counter top, because there is a large pool of water living there. Don't bother to squeegee it off, because it will be filled with water again from the next user.

 

4. Drip. Maybe it is because of shorter sausages, but there is usually more piss on the floor in front of the toilet or urinal than ends up inside it. No soap, no towels, and no disinfecting procedure to clean whatever ends up on your shoes. And you wondered why Chinese people take off their shoes in the house.

 

Chinese drivers still bother me, but I do my best to avoid them. I know they will be driving on the sidewalks and the wrong way on the roads. I can look and prepare for them most of the time.

Alrighty now, this is my kinda thread.

 

When I came home from Vietnam, the first time, the plane stopped in Hong Kong and we spent the night there. Early next morning a cabbie took me to the plane bound for America. On the ride to the airport some guy walked up to the curb and blew outta his nose the longest string of snot I had ever seen....I opened my door and PUKED right in front of him it was so disgusting.

 

Looking back, I laugh at my sorry ass, I mean what the frack, here I had just gotten out of a helicopter a few hours earlier where I had been carrying kids with guts hanging out, legs blown off, blood and body parts everywhere and all of that had long ago stopped botherin' me at all....yet I puke at a long string of snot....woe is me, I have done some stupid things in my life, but that long string of snot intrigued me for some reason.

 

Years later I takes the travelin' tsap seui side show to Chinertucky to meet some Chiner lady. I meet up with Wenyan and in the Mei Du Hotel in Fushun one night we walk down to the restaurant. Marble floors everywhere in the hotel and in the entire put yer feed bag on room (restaurant). Well sir, we walked past a security guard and he absently spit a large wad of mouth cum, or whatever it is called when you jes need to spit a half a gallon of saliva. I laughed out loud as it was so cool of him to just spit uncaringly on marble freakin' floors in the second best hotel in Fushun.

 

Me n' lil' rabbit are at a table lookin' at the pitchers of food on the menu and Mr. Barney Fife Zhang, the security guard goes and sits down about 15 feet away from us. The tiny hiney waitress comes over to us and Wenyan gives her order to the young gal...just then Barney Fife rears WAY back, makes some LOUD gutteral throat sounds as his body pulls up a deeply embedded oyster from WAY DOWN and with a LOUD PATOOEY his hocks a HUGE green clam, the largest I have ever personally witnessed, right onto the marble floor by his own shoe.

 

Folks, I kid you not, this damn oyster or clam as you will, was so big it had its own zip code, I looked over at it in pure wonderment and watched it quivering back and forth like it had something to say or at the very least had it's own heartbeat.

 

The waitress, Wenyan, and I finally stopped gawkin' at the world largest mouth oyster and it's proud former owner, and the tiny butted waitress asked me what I wanted to eat?......what else says I???? "I'll take the oysters" I told her with glee. Man, that thang layin' there and quiverin' like it was shore made me powerful hungry for some reason. WhooooWee

 

See, after my second tour in ol' Vietnam, I had growed up and long strings of snot, mouth clams, even an old momma-san squatin' down right in front of me, hikin' down her black pajama pants, and pinchin' a long black loaf right there between her feet....shucks, none of that bothered me anymore.

 

Now, this here piss on the floor.....I love shakin' the dew offa my lilly in Chinertucky. On our way down to Shenyang to get married, Chinese style, there was 4 guys right on the side of the highway with their waterspouts in their hands makin' the ol' golden arch right there for God and country to see.....well, me bein' tsap seui, I tell Mr. Taxi Zhong to stop the donkey cart RIGHT THERE....I hop out, run over by them ol' boys, and pull out ol' John Thomas and start my own golden arch....only my arch was so big it made it's own rainbow, what with all the sunshine....hehehe

 

Well, me n' lil' rabbit gits hitched in Shenyang and off we head back to Fushun...we enter the city limits and what do I spy...three hombres writin' their names on the side of a buildin' right there in the open and DOWNTOWN. Again, I gives the order to stop that dern donkey right here in it's tracks. I run over to them ol' boys and pull out my merry maker and start writin' words like Mississippi on the wall. I ain't so stupid as to write my own name on the side of a building.

 

I have grown to really like China....the freedom to piss in the open, RIGHT DOWNTOWN if'n you choose. And I like the sounds and sights of people hockin' up big green, yellow, and even black oysters, clams, luggies, you name it, and folks puttin' one finger up one nostrel and blowing out copious amounts of snot through the other....I think it is all hilarious. So does my lil' blushin' bride.

 

I don't like pretentious people anyhow and Chinertucky is a relaxing place to visit. And the mens is REAL MENS....they got a biological body function that needs attending to....they jes take care of business right then and there....no matter where "there" is.

 

Offended, not in the least...I can spit, piss, and hock just as long and as much as the best of them thar Zhangs. And some of them ol' boys is "talented" I tells ya.

 

Nice thread Jesse. We needed a change of pace.

 

tsap seui

I gotta go eat me some chicken curry on rice....we lovingly calls it "baby caca n' chicken" as that curry we get sent over from Chiner is some kinda tasty, but dang if it don't look baby shit yeller in color.

Edited February 24, 2012 by tsap seui (see edit history)

[Guest ExChinaExpat]

tsap my friend, you have one of the most uncanny and unique abilities to tell a story I've ever seen. I'm still laughing my ass off. An oyster with it's own zip code?

 

And speaking of golden arches, you're right. If ya gotta piss, do it. I recall our friend David (Dawei) visiting Nanjing a long while back. We traveled to the city of yangzhou, where we were either in the train or bus station. This place too had nice marble floors with a very large open area. We were all making our way to the ticket counter, when right in front of us was an older man holding a small boy about 6-years old, as he laid a curly turd right in the middle of the floor. Now, that is a little more unusal to see than the China mothers who seem to have perfected the aim from their female child's clam, directly into a nearby trash can. I didn't know that was something that could be done, but have seen it a few times. Hence, the open back and front on the pants, which adds a good level of convenience.

 

Pretentious people don't last long in China, but I still reserve the right to bump fists with the Chinese person rather than making full hand contact.

 

Edited February 24, 2012 by JiangsuExpat (see edit history)

[Mick]

I could tell you many spitting stories I encountered in my five years living in China. What I have noticed, however, is there now seems to be more of it going on here in the States as well. I don't know if this is a southern things or it is nationwide. But I have noticed far more lugie tossing here in good old USA than when I moved to China from Miami back in 97. Anyone else notice this?

[DennisLeiqin]

I could tell you many spitting stories I encountered in my five years living in China. What I have noticed, however, is there now seems to be more of it going on here in the States as well. I don't know if this is a southern things or it is nationwide. But I have noticed far more lugie tossing here in good old USA than when I moved to China from Miami back in 97. Anyone else notice this?

I live within and among the largest Chinese area within the US. Happily, I don't see this here. I believe that, once here, they quickly learn what is accepted as appropriate behavior. I also believe that other chinese teach and probably admonish those who attempt to carry on those China behaviors here.

 

And, don't think that those Chinese who live within this area the more well healed. I often wonder how beggers and winos got here.

[dnoblett]

Kind of reminds me of Bob and Doug.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVJxhhjXY04&t=26s

[Mick]

I could tell you many spitting stories I encountered in my five years living in China. What I have noticed, however, is there now seems to be more of it going on here in the States as well. I don't know if this is a southern things or it is nationwide. But I have noticed far more lugie tossing here in good old USA than when I moved to China from Miami back in 97. Anyone else notice this?

I live within and among the largest Chinese area within the US. Happily, I don't see this here. I believe that, once here, they quickly learn what is accepted as appropriate behavior. I also believe that other chinese teach and probably admonish those who attempt to carry on those China behaviors here.

 

And, don't think that those Chinese who live within this area the more well healed. I often wonder how beggers and winos got here.

Dennis, I know you are in So Cal, but where exactly? Do you live near Monterey Park? Before I moved to China, I spent a month in that area immersing myself in the culture. I loved it there. Also spent time way out in Pomona (sp?) at Cal Poly Tech in language training.

[DennisLeiqin]

I could tell you many spitting stories I encountered in my five years living in China. What I have noticed, however, is there now seems to be more of it going on here in the States as well. I don't know if this is a southern things or it is nationwide. But I have noticed far more lugie tossing here in good old USA than when I moved to China from Miami back in 97. Anyone else notice this?

I live within and among the largest Chinese area within the US. Happily, I don't see this here. I believe that, once here, they quickly learn what is accepted as appropriate behavior. I also believe that other chinese teach and probably admonish those who attempt to carry on those China behaviors here.

 

And, don't think that those Chinese who live within this area the more well healed. I often wonder how beggers and winos got here.

Dennis, I know you are in So Cal, but where exactly? Do you live near Monterey Park? Before I moved to China, I spent a month in that area immersing myself in the culture. I loved it there. Also spent time way out in Pomona (sp?) at Cal Poly Tech in language training.

We were living in Alhambra and now live close to Chinatown downtown LA. I believe Monterey Park is something like 95% asian now. You can actually drive for miles down Valley Blvd and seldom see a non-Asian face or business. Yes, MOPA was a good place to immerse yourself.

 

As far as those disgusting behaviors back in China, I also believe that once here they understand that hawking lugies in public places could get them arrested. Yep, piss and water is everywhere inside a Chinese supermarket restroom.

Edited February 24, 2012 by DennisLeiqin (see edit history)

[knloregon]

"...The waitress, Wenyan, and I finally stopped gawkin' at the world largest mouth oyster and it's proud former owner, and the tiny butted waitress asked me what I wanted to eat?......what else says I???? "I'll take the oysters" I told her with glee. Man, that thang layin' there and quiverin' like it was shore made me powerful hungry for some reason. WhooooWee.."

 

"I'll take the oysters" well, ifun' you be a tidewater boy, the lil' lady be lookin' at yo sideways, knowin' smile at that point, full well aticipatin' what them oysterds gonna' do---and your next move ~ n' all started from that one--- "quiverin' on the floor!

 

Oysters "R" in season ~! and Lordy, yes they are!

 

[tsap seui]

"...The waitress, Wenyan, and I finally stopped gawkin' at the world largest mouth oyster and it's proud former owner, and the tiny butted waitress asked me what I wanted to eat?......what else says I???? "I'll take the oysters" I told her with glee. Man, that thang layin' there and quiverin' like it was shore made me powerful hungry for some reason. WhooooWee.."

 

"I'll take the oysters" well, ifun' you be a tidewater boy, the lil' lady be lookin' at yo sideways, knowin' smile at that point, full well aticipatin' what them oysterds gonna' do---and your next move ~ n' all started from that one--- "quiverin' on the floor!

 

Oysters "R" in season ~! and Lordy, yes they are!

 

Kim, I hears ya about them oysters n' clams, buddy.

 

This is my kinda thread right cheer. There is jes something appealing to my nature about a place where a man kin fearlessly write him name on the side of a downtown building , hock up big shoe stealing clams on the sidewalk, spit or blow yore nose on the marble floor of a restaurant, and burp or fart REAL DAMN loud when you need to....without anyone thinkin' twice about it.

 

I must ask, who by gum is more civilized, us'in or them? I say them....they don't play no cutesy crap with their biological processes.

 

tsap seui

Life is so much fun

[chilton747]

"...The waitress, Wenyan, and I finally stopped gawkin' at the world largest mouth oyster and it's proud former owner, and the tiny butted waitress asked me what I wanted to eat?......what else says I???? "I'll take the oysters" I told her with glee. Man, that thang layin' there and quiverin' like it was shore made me powerful hungry for some reason. WhooooWee.."

 

"I'll take the oysters" well, ifun' you be a tidewater boy, the lil' lady be lookin' at yo sideways, knowin' smile at that point, full well aticipatin' what them oysterds gonna' do---and your next move ~ n' all started from that one--- "quiverin' on the floor!

 

Oysters "R" in season ~! and Lordy, yes they are!

 

Kim, I hears ya about them oysters n' clams, buddy.

 

This is my kinda thread right cheer. There is jes something appealing to my nature about a place where a man kin fearlessly write him name on the side of a downtown building , hock up big shoe stealing clams on the sidewalk, spit or blow yore nose on the marble floor of a restaurant, and burp or fart REAL DAMN loud when you need to....without anyone thinkin' twice about it.

 

I must ask, who by gum is more civilized, us'in or them? I say them....they don't play no cutesy crap with their biological processes.

 

tsap seui

Life is so much fun

 

A redneck;s dream I's tells ya!!!

[knloregon]

" Pretentious people don't last long in China, but I still reserve the right to bump fists with the Chinese person rather than making full hand contact..." which reminds me of the the Sharon Stone (I think) story that in order to 'save the environment" she was committed to using only one square of TP after "#2" .... After much discussion online, of fellow said something like: "Look, I don't have a clue what's on her mind with this----but I'm pretty sure I know what's on her hand...."

 

 

[canrun]

Sorry to bring up a very old thread, but I have noticed a LOT of spitting among college-age students at SF State, where I attend. Someone earlier mentioned this behavior in the South...and as a Georgia born and bred guy, I can tell you I never, EVER saw this kind of behavior in the South.

 

Lewis Grizzard would NOT approve.

 

One of my classmates said: "San Francisco people have no manners."

 

I have to agree with him on this one...

 

(BTW...lived in China eight years...returning later this year...spitting still my #1 pet peeve, though I've learned to wear headphones wherever I go- that certainly helps. It's not the spit so much...it's the preceding hoooock.)

Edited January 27, 2013 by canrun (see edit history)