Starting from scratch

[evansfan]

We have mutual friends whose personalities would seem to mesh but unfortunately the language gap is massive, as of now they trade emails that are translated. Her last english class was many years ago. Even under these circumstances, My friend wants to see her for a week during an upcoming business trip, with not enough time for the upcoming english classes to help. Which leads to a group of questions,of course like microwave ovens your performance may vary

 

Was any one else in this position: Please share your experiences

 

did you use electronc translators was that enough or do you think hiring a human translator is worth the cost

 

How difficult was that first trip

 

 

WHat did you do to make it bearable

 

were any of you in a relationship and you visited to soon and the language gap sabotaged a promising start

 

ANy information will be passed on and greatly appreciated

 

Upon your SO's arrival to US how fast b4 conversational skills reached criticall mass

Edited November 4, 2007 by evansfan (see edit history)

[warpedbored]

There have been many of us on this board who's sweet heart spoke very poor or no English at first. My wife's English was very rusty and almost non existent when we first met. By the time we were married it was functional. At first we used pocket translators. then we progressed to using Yahoo messenger with web cams and microphones. Since she could read English better than listen to it I would type while speaking. This improved her listening skills enormously. Now after 3 1/2 years of marriage we hardly use our pocket translators anymore. While maybe not completely fluent her English is more than adequate to communicate.

[pkfops]

I have also heard that many of the wives here also use the mop

translation method.

[tywy_99]

Pocket translators are a good idea. They both could use one and they do work in helping to translate.

Today, my wife uses two thick dictionaries to help her translate.

The trips weren't unbearable and the language situation was okay. My wife didn't speak much english at first but she's getting better every day.

Her english is better but she'll never speak fluent, perfect english, I don't think. And I don't expect her to because, afterall, she's Chinese.

 

Even with the language gap, I think they will do just fine. It'll be a learning experience for both of them, and a joyful one.

 

-good luck

[lostinblue]

I believe that if they have not communicated much before this trip maybe a human translator for at least a day would be helpfull .Just to get some important structure into the relationship. Many issues could be discussed during this time that would help get things off on the right foot. Just have the woman hire maybe a student at a university . Yan said maybe $20-30/day depending on location.

[Guest Rob & Jin]

On our first meeting Jin's english was pretty poor, led to some misunderstandings. We have talked about that alot and how we assessed eachothers body launguage more than we normally would. Also that as a chinese woman she is more reserved in showing her feelings openly until she sees you do this first.

So i guess what i'm saying is be open first, dont view her as you would a western woman, once you open up you may well be susprised .

A pocket translator is good, jin still uses on occasion, but her speed in learning english is impressive to say the least.

[Shenzhen K-1]

On our first meeting Jin's english was pretty poor, led to some misunderstandings. We have talked about that alot and how we assessed eachothers body launguage more than we normally would. Also that as a chinese woman she is more reserved in showing her feelings openly until she sees you do this first.

So i guess what i'm saying is be open first, dont view her as you would a western woman, once you open up you may well be susprised .

A pocket translator is good, jin still uses on occasion, but her speed in learning english is impressive to say the least.

 

I agree with Rob and Jin, body language helps and a pocket translator helped in tough situations. In most Chinese restaurants they hand her a normal menu and then you will get the picture one for slow people!! We had a few misunderstandings as documnted before but not too bad. We only used a translator on the days we met family for the first time, could not keep up with the questions!!

[evansfan]

Thanks for all the wonderful advice please keep the suggestions coming

[Shenzhen K-1]

I really enjoy the posts about people packing for there first trip and questions!!!

 

It seems like just a few weeks ago we met for the first time and struggled through the whole language thing!

 

I was nervous as all get out and then she walked into my hotel!! We hugged and politely kissed and then sat down and just looked at each other for a bit!!!

 

Then she got out her translator and got down to asking questions!! She was more ready then me, did not care just was going.........

 

[Guest hi5pro]

I really enjoy the posts about people packing for there first trip and questions!!!

 

It seems like just a few weeks ago we met for the first time and struggled through the whole language thing!

 

I was nervous as all get out and then she walked into my hotel!! We hugged and politely kissed and then sat down and just looked at each other for a bit!!!

 

Then she got out her translator and got down to asking questions!! She was more ready then me, did not care just was going.........

 

Nice...I can feel the atmosphere !!

 

Best wishes,

 

Gino & Lulu

[Dennis143]

We have mutual friends whose personalities would seem to mesh but unfortunately the language gap is massive, as of now they trade emails that are translated. Her last english class was many years ago. Even under these circumstances, My friend wants to see her for a week during an upcoming business trip, with not enough time for the upcoming english classes to help. Which leads to a group of questions,of course like microwave ovens your performance may vary

 

Was any one else in this position: Please share your experiences

 

did you use electronc translators was that enough or do you think hiring a human translator is worth the cost

 

How difficult was that first trip

 

 

WHat did you do to make it bearable

 

were any of you in a relationship and you visited to soon and the language gap sabotaged a promising start

 

ANy information will be passed on and greatly appreciated

 

Upon your SO's arrival to US how fast b4 conversational skills reached criticall mass

Personally, I don't think that just any man (or woman) can make this trip and be successful without a mindset knowing there is a language barrier and that that barrier is a wall that cannot be climbed. They realize what the quest is and what the potential rewards may be. Impatient people need not apply. We look beyond what cannot be said. And, we look at (body language) the unspoken acts. Beauty can intoxicate. So, if it comes to fruition and she (or he) is with you, the test (of patience and of love) begins, for both.

[warpedbored]

Personally, I don't think that just any man (or woman) can make this trip and be successful without a mindset knowing there is a language barrier and that that barrier is a wall that cannot be climbed. They realize what the quest is and what the potential rewards may be. Impatient people need not apply. We look beyond what cannot be said. And, we look at (body language) the unspoken acts. Beauty can intoxicate. So, if it comes to fruition and she (or he) is with you, the test (of patience and of love) begins, for both.

Good point Dennis but it really is amazing how much you can make understood without a common language.

Edited November 8, 2007 by warpedbored (see edit history)

[Dennis143]

Personally, I don't think that just any man (or woman) can make this trip and be successful without a mindset knowing there is a language barrier and that that barrier is a wall that cannot be climbed. They realize what the quest is and what the potential rewards may be. Impatient people need not apply. We look beyond what cannot be said. And, we look at (body language) the unspoken acts. Beauty can intoxicate. So, if it comes to fruition and she (or he) is with you, the test (of patience and of love) begins, for both.

Good point Dennis but it really is amazing how much you can make understood without a common language.

Isn't that the truth, Carl. That was essentially what I was trying to convey.

 

Leiqin was with my family a few weeks back. In the past she would not even attempt to talk. She's still a bit shy about it, but one evening with my sister and brother-in-law Leiqin became quite the chatter box. The interesting part to me was how Leiqin would state something (in English) and my sis and her husband would look at me for interpretation. And, I would interpret. Leiqin and I have developed our own way of talking...communicating. It's not unlike a mother who can understand what their toddler says, as an American woman pointed out to me.

[AmericanRooster]

sorry for the delay, I've been in China for the last couple of weeks...

 

1. did you use electronc translators was that enough or do you think hiring a human translator is worth the cost

 

Julie knew practically zero english the first time we met... she had one of those little white electronic dictionaries that helped considerably, but doing any kind of travel together is still a significant pain in the rear when it comes to choosing hotels, getting information on where you are now, etc...

 

2. How difficult was that first trip

 

It had some difficult moments, but nothing exceptionally bad. At the end of our first trip together, we knew we were right for each other in spite of the communication challenges. You can know a lot about a person from watching how they treat others... in Julie's case, it was easy to see what her heart was like.

 

3. WHat did you do to make it bearable

 

Patience, laughter and that little white electronic dictionary.

 

4. Upon your SO's arrival to US how fast b4 conversational skills reached criticall mass

 

Julie started taking full-time english classes in February 2007. After about 8 months of classes, we talk a lot and only look up about 5 or 7 words a day. Her grammar isn't perfect but it's almost good enough for any english speaker to understand her meaning. Most of the issues now are just expanding her vocabulary to include things like "mop", "garlic", "preference", etc... I'm impressed with how quickly she picked up english.

 

To add a flip side... this easily could have been a disaster... it depends on the emotional maturity of both... there are plenty of motives for either person to be deceptive... if that happens, your friends could wind up with a lot of heartbreak down the road. Nothing can replace good communication... I think I was very blessed to find Julie the way I did.

[warpedbored]

At first we used pocket translators a lot. As we talked more the English she learned in middle school started coming back to her. It took off from there. Now we still use pocket translators but only if it is a word she doesn't know. We sometimes go for months without using one.