Making up

[Guest Duke]

To answer the original posters question... Flowers? not for my wife as it is a waste of money to buy something that dies.

Chocolates? No again because she does not want to be fat.

Beauty products? Perfume? Clothes?

None of these has ever worked for me so my advice is to not be a jerk and always be wrong even if your right!

 

Get my point?

 

I let her know I'm sorry for any part I had in any disagreement and then wait until tomorrow for things to return to normal.

[jim_julian]

Two points ...

 

1. Why not discuss it before hand? Everyone is different. Talk it out before there is a problem. We did that, and we have never had a serious disagreement in 2.5 years.

 

2. At this point in your relationship you should both acknowledge that she understands China and Chinese ways better and you understand the US and American ways better. Therefore, if the issue is particular to China or the US and there is a difference of opinion, it is likely that the party with the better understanding should make the final decision. We have taken this path successfully on several occasions.

Edited January 31, 2007 by jim_julian (see edit history)

[izus]

but i think we all fight for one reason

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

the make up sex

[NewDay2006]

I think I see where I've been doing something wrong.

 

You mean when she goes off you guys don't tell her to shut up her bitchin'? The way it works in our house, she goes off on some little thing that don't mean nothing. Then I tell her to put a sock in it and get a grip. Then she gets pissed at me cause I'm pissed at her. Some days later, one of us gets horny and then it's all over.

 

And the Don has spoken

[aclassic]

Your point is well taken

 

You have heard that “Long Distance Romances Don’t Work.” Well, here is a site that proves that statement wrong. Although one of the most difficult parts of your relationship will be the waiting and getting to know each other prior to her arrival, there will be a lot of conflicts and “misunderstandings” during this period. Its called the “SOFT ZONE”, because both of you are still in your own environments and feel comfortable no matter what is said.

 

Even after she gets here you will have a lot of misunderstandings and conflicts. The one thing to remember is that when she is here, she is by herself (no relatives in the USA) and sometimes she will be defending her own actions because she has no idea how to do things here like she did in China.

 

Let’s keep things in perspective, we may not like what the other person does (actions) but we still love the other person in our hearts – no matter what. Right?

 

With that all said and done, my experience in the beginnings with my wife was also a lot of “misunderstandings”, mostly not understanding each other, i.e. language barrier, mood swings, etc.. It wasn’t like I would say one thing and she would say another. No, No, No, that was in my previous life with my ex when I would say HOT and she would say COLD. What I mean is your wife/girlfriend may not understand each other. You both are in “training” trying to learn each other’s culture, lives, experiences, food, etc., etc..

 

Like Lee said in his post, it’s easier to say “I don’t understand” than to not talk at all.

 

Which reminds me of the old saying “You can catch a lot more flies with sugar water than you can vinegar”. – Try it!

[aclassic]

I think I see where I've been doing something wrong.

 

You mean when she goes off you guys don't tell her to shut up her bitchin'? The way it works in our house, she goes off on some little thing that don't mean nothing. Then I tell her to put a sock in it and get a grip. Then she gets pissed at me cause I'm pissed at her. Some days later, one of us gets horny and then it's all over.

 

Verrrrrrrrry funny

[warpedbored]

I think I see where I've been doing something wrong.

 

You mean when she goes off you guys don't tell her to shut up her bitchin'? The way it works in our house, she goes off on some little thing that don't mean nothing. Then I tell her to put a sock in it and get a grip. Then she gets pissed at me cause I'm pissed at her. Some days later, one of us gets horny and then it's all over.

Thats the natural order of things Don. (don't tell Xiahong I said that, she might tell Bing)

[SirLancelot]

To answer the original posters question... Flowers? not for my wife as it is a waste of money to buy something that dies.

Chocolates? No again because she does not want to be fat.

Beauty products? Perfume? Clothes?

 

 

I have yet to meet a single female anywhere who doesn't really appreciate flowers deep down inside. I've known girls who claim they don't care for flowers, and yet if a guy were to actually give them flowers, they'd have this huge beaming smile on their face. Chinese women may say "oh it's too expensive; it's a waste of money" but if you actually brought them flowers, I strongly suspect they'll love it deep down inside and they'll probably be bragging to their girlfriends that you bought them such expensive flowers.

 

I'd definitely suggest flowers as a good peace offering. I strongly believe it'll work every time and with every girl.

[Dennis143]

I have yet to meet a single female anywhere who doesn't really appreciate flowers deep down inside. I've known girls who claim they don't care for flowers, and yet if a guy were to actually give them flowers, they'd have this huge beaming smile on their face. Chinese women may say "oh it's too expensive; it's a waste of money" but if you actually brought them flowers, I strongly suspect they'll love it deep down inside and they'll probably be bragging to their girlfriends that you bought them such expensive flowers.

 

I'd definitely suggest flowers as a good peace offering. I strongly believe it'll work every time and with every girl.

Gosh darn it, Lance. I've often thought of buying that bouqet of roses from that guy on the side of the freeway off ramp, but figured she'd think it was a waste. And, now I will be very hard pressed to resist that temptation.

[SirLancelot]

I have yet to meet a single female anywhere who doesn't really appreciate flowers deep down inside. I've known girls who claim they don't care for flowers, and yet if a guy were to actually give them flowers, they'd have this huge beaming smile on their face. Chinese women may say "oh it's too expensive; it's a waste of money" but if you actually brought them flowers, I strongly suspect they'll love it deep down inside and they'll probably be bragging to their girlfriends that you bought them such expensive flowers.

 

I'd definitely suggest flowers as a good peace offering. I strongly believe it'll work every time and with every girl.

Gosh darn it, Lance. I've often thought of buying that bouqet of roses from that guy on the side of the freeway off ramp, but figured she'd think it was a waste. And, now I will be very hard pressed to resist that temptation.

 

I think your precious SO is worth more than the $3.99 bouquet of roses from that guy off the streets. Try 1-800-FLOWERS or FTD.

 

Here we go; I think your SO deserves this treat:

http://www.ftd.com/522/catalog/product.epl...d=product_roses

 

[izus]

I have yet to meet a single female anywhere who doesn't really appreciate flowers deep down inside. I've known girls who claim they don't care for flowers, and yet if a guy were to actually give them flowers, they'd have this huge beaming smile on their face. Chinese women may say "oh it's too expensive; it's a waste of money" but if you actually brought them flowers, I strongly suspect they'll love it deep down inside and they'll probably be bragging to their girlfriends that you bought them such expensive flowers.

 

I'd definitely suggest flowers as a good peace offering. I strongly believe it'll work every time and with every girl.

Gosh darn it, Lance. I've often thought of buying that bouqet of roses from that guy on the side of the freeway off ramp, but figured she'd think it was a waste. And, now I will be very hard pressed to resist that temptation.

 

I think your precious SO is worth more than the $3.99 bouquet of roses from that guy off the streets. Try 1-800-FLOWERS or FTD.

 

Here we go; I think your SO deserves this treat:

http://www.ftd.com/522/catalog/product.epl...d=product_roses

 

 

that sort of thing is much more expensive then usuall this time of year...

my chick gets happy friday flowers almost every week.....

 

our house is loaded with plants these days.

 

Publix has decnet prices on flowers, i think walmart does too.

you might say buying flowers from walmart?

but if you buy flowers every week you need the resource.

plus when they are sitting ontop ourkitchen table in one of her little pretty vases no one can tell they are from walmart or target bytheway.

[david_dawei]

I have yet to meet a single female anywhere who doesn't really appreciate flowers deep down inside. I've known girls who claim they don't care for flowers, and yet if a guy were to actually give them flowers, they'd have this huge beaming smile on their face. Chinese women may say "oh it's too expensive; it's a waste of money" but if you actually brought them flowers, I strongly suspect they'll love it deep down inside and they'll probably be bragging to their girlfriends that you bought them such expensive flowers.

 

I'd definitely suggest flowers as a good peace offering. I strongly believe it'll work every time and with every girl.

Gosh darn it, Lance. I've often thought of buying that bouqet of roses from that guy on the side of the freeway off ramp, but figured she'd think it was a waste. And, now I will be very hard pressed to resist that temptation.

this is yet another area our wives are similar.. mine chews my head off for spending money so wastefully.. then tells me I should of bought them at the cheaper place... it's so worth it to see her take care of the flowers every day, trying to prolong their life.. metaphor for how they also try to prolong our lives together...

[PapaBear]

"to see her take care of the flowers every day, trying to prolong their life.. metaphor for how they also try to prolong our lives together..."

 

Yes, I see the metaphor.......and I like it! Never looked at it that way intentionally.....but you know each and every time I give her flowers I know that is what's happening!!

 

Awh....flowers do lift the spirit and sets the atmosphere to a higher plane!

 

PapaBear

[yuehan123]

Our roses are real plants, she planted 'em out front, and she cares for them just like David said.

We have real roses because 'cut flowers are a waste of money' and I don't want mop slapped anymore than I have to.

 

When we have an argument- I mean, when she gets angry... I have learned to be quiet, wait a few minutes and then some mutual hugs solve whatever the problem was. The other day when she went to town she was soooo mad. But, when she got home, parked the car and came inside she hollered out her usual 'honey, I'm home.' Then, all she could do was laugh because she forgot to be mad.

[aclassic]

I think I see where I've been doing something wrong.

 

You mean when she goes off you guys don't tell her to shut up her bitchin'? The way it works in our house, she goes off on some little thing that don't mean nothing. Then I tell her to put a sock in it and get a grip. Then she gets pissed at me cause I'm pissed at her. Some days later, one of us gets horny and then it's all over.

 

the get horny part will do the trick every time