mariage ok! but divorce ?

[pinky2006]

Hi Everyone,

None of us marry to think about divorce however I came from a really bad one and I wish to make sure I understand everything first.

 

So anyway, I was wondering if marrying in China or America made any differences in case of a divorce?

[Guest pushbrk]

Hi Everyone,

None of us marry to think about divorce however I came from a really bad one and I wish to make sure I understand everything first.

 

So anyway, I was wondering if marrying in China or America made any differences in case of a divorce?

182298[/snapback]

There have been two concurrent threads that discussed this extensively in the last couple of weeks. Find them in the "Our Stories" forum at this site. Start here:

 

http://candleforlove.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=15078

[david_dawei]

I'll answer this from a different angle...

 

Divorce for a chinese lady can bring tremendous shame to her and her family.. if she is already divorced, then there is an unwritten thought that 'divorce marry divorce'... since marrying a person already with a divorce can be bad luck... but don't take this too seriously...

 

Also, don't ever mention this "D" word to her...

 

There may be a lot to the chinese culture that will come as a surprise or shock to you...

[maiyademama]

Hi Everyone,

None of us marry to think about divorce however I came from a really bad one and I wish to make sure I understand everything first.

 

So anyway, I was wondering if marrying in China or America made any differences in case of a divorce?

182298[/snapback]

I am prepping for a divorce with my husband from China. We were married in China, so this is very problematic in terms of establishing visitation (have a child) and the division of assets. I sorely wish that we had gotten married in the US! It would make my life loads easier! If you get married in China you must have the divorce in China unless you don't mind that whenever you do go to China, you will be married in China even if divorced in the US. My recommendation is for you to Marry in the States.

[pinky2006]

Hi Everyone,

None of us marry to think about divorce however I came from a really bad one and I wish to make sure I understand everything first.

 

So anyway, I was wondering if marrying in China or America made any differences in case of a divorce?

182298[/snapback]

I am prepping for a divorce with my husband from China. We were married in China, so this is very problematic in terms of establishing visitation (have a child) and the division of assets. I sorely wish that we had gotten married in the US! It would make my life loads easier! If you get married in China you must have the divorce in China unless you don't mind that whenever you do go to China, you will be married in China even if divorced in the US. My recommendation is for you to Marry in the States.

182306[/snapback]

we are actually both divorced so maybe divorce marry divorce will be our luck

I do not intend to divorce at all but I wanted to know the difference.

thanks for everyone's help , I will read more in the "our storries"

[Guest pushbrk]

Hi Everyone,

None of us marry to think about divorce however I came from a really bad one and I wish to make sure I understand everything first.

 

So anyway, I was wondering if marrying in China or America made any differences in case of a divorce?

182298[/snapback]

I am prepping for a divorce with my husband from China. We were married in China, so this is very problematic in terms of establishing visitation (have a child) and the division of assets. I sorely wish that we had gotten married in the US! It would make my life loads easier! If you get married in China you must have the divorce in China unless you don't mind that whenever you do go to China, you will be married in China even if divorced in the US. My recommendation is for you to Marry in the States.

182306[/snapback]

I wonder if you would elaborate some on what you've found out. The way I understand it the Chinese government recognizes marriages that occur in the USA. It would seem that even if you had been married here, the fact that you are the Mother of a Chinese Citizen's child would cause complications with regard to taking your child to China, in that you might have to "consume" US assets to buy her way back out of China. There's nothing official the Chinese government can do to get your assets directly if they are in the US.

 

For those who do not have children with their Chinese spouse there are no such complications. They can marry in China and divorce in USA the same as if they had married in the USA.

[pinky2006]

Hi Everyone,

None of us marry to think about divorce however I came from a really bad one and I wish to make sure I understand everything first.

 

So anyway, I was wondering if marrying in China or America made any differences in case of a divorce?

182298[/snapback]

I am prepping for a divorce with my husband from China. We were married in China, so this is very problematic in terms of establishing visitation (have a child) and the division of assets. I sorely wish that we had gotten married in the US! It would make my life loads easier! If you get married in China you must have the divorce in China unless you don't mind that whenever you do go to China, you will be married in China even if divorced in the US. My recommendation is for you to Marry in the States.

182306[/snapback]

I wonder if you would elaborate some on what you've found out. The way I understand it the Chinese government recognizes marriages that occur in the USA. It would seem that even if you had been married here, the fact that you are the Mother of a Chinese Citizen's child would cause complications with regard to taking your child to China, in that you might have to "consume" US assets to buy her way back out of China. There's nothing official the Chinese government can do to get your assets directly if they are in the US.

 

For those who do not have children with their Chinese spouse there are no such complications. They can marry in China and divorce in USA the same as if they had married in the USA.

182311[/snapback]

so the complication of having a child is really just a custody issue and the fact that china is not a member of the Hagues convention for international children abduction.

 

I am definetely not up to speed on the custody issues with China but I if I can be of any help:

 

I was born in France came to America, got a child with an American woman, got divorced (had all the custody issues you can immagine, not to mention that this did cost all the equity we had in our home and got us both broke and dumb) got dual citizenship for my kid, french and american and then eventually, I became american as well and have dual citizenship.

After years of battle with my kid's mom we are now good friends and doing the best for our kid so if you need advises, ... feel free to ask

[jim_julian]

My recommendation is to get married in the US and have a pre-nuptial agreement.

 

You are right, none of us get married thinking we will get divorced BUT there always is some chance divorce will happen and it makes good sense for the parties to define the circumstances in advance.

 

Discuss a pre-nup with her. Get one developed in English and have her get it translated into Chinese. Unless her English is flawless tell her to consult with a Chinese speaking lawyer of her choice and provide documentation that she did.

 

There are many here who disagree with me on this and all are entitled to their opinions.

[pinky2006]

My recommendation is to get married in the US and have a pre-nuptial agreement.

 

You are right, none of us get married thinking we will get divorced BUT there always is some chance divorce will happen and it makes good sense for the parties to define the circumstances in advance.

 

Discuss a pre-nup with her.  Get one developed in English and have her get it translated into Chinese.  Unless her English is flawless tell her to consult with a Chinese speaking lawyer of her choice and provide documentation that she did.

 

There are many here who disagree with me on this and all are entitled to their opinions.

182366[/snapback]

JIM!!!!!!!! What did you bring up again?

 

Oh please, Dear God, no discussion about prenups again, again, again.

182415[/snapback]

hehehe LOL

thanks for the info, I will take my own decision when the time comes, no need to start a long discussion, I got info from both side, that's what I needed.

 

Thanks

[warpedbored]

Don is right. The topic of pre-nups surfaces every so often and always causes heated debate.