TLB

Well Tsap, I for one continue to be amazed at your ability to take all this and continue to laugh. Your patience certainly outshines mine. Best to the both of you.

About 200 rmb for the marriage registration ; another 200 for notarial/ translational services ; US consul 200 rmb for certificate of marriagability. total about 600 rmb ; a little less than 100 bucks . {edit} quote tags restored Cool; thanks. I'm getting married in Shenyang next week! B)

What were the fees (if you don't mind saying)?

China has been removed from the "send to" pulldown menu... ========= Notice of Xoom Service Cancellation to China Starting June 18th, 2010, Xoom will be discontinuing our service to China. Any transactions that have been placed before this time will be processed as usual. We sincerely apologize for any inconvenience this change in our service may cause you. We have made this difficult choice because while quality of service was good for many customers, we were unable to provide the magical level of service for all customers sending to China, to which we hold ourselves when we serve a market. If you have any questions or concerns regarding this change, please send us an email through our Help Center at, or, call our Customer Service team at 877-815-1531 (within the U.S.) or 415-395-4225 (outside the U.S.). Our call center is available 24 hours per day, 7 days per week. Sincerely, The Xoom Customer Service Team

It probably does do that with some Chinese, but I read somewhere that Las Vegas is one of the favorite places in the US for Chinese to visit.

It's funny how Chinese and Americans can be so a like sometimes. Both love their countries, warts and all. Try having a rational discussion with your Chinese spouse about Taiwan or Tibet. or Cuba,Panama, Mexico, PRVN,Guam,Okinawa and Texas. Texas? TEXAS?!? The Chinese argue with people about TEXAS? Wow, we're even more important than I thought! (a dangerous direction for a Texan to go...) As for the "we got it from Mexico", actually (1) no, we didn't, and (2) to be truthful, pretty much every part of the USA was taken from somebody!

Texans sometimes have a line of defense to head this off before it happens... http://news8austin.com/content/top_stories...orning-shooting

Somewhere in the back halls of the CCP, someone is heard mumbling: "I wonder whether we should have opened that damned door after all..."

Nice try on your part, but I'm afraid nothing will ever put to rest the argument over what kills people That people kill people is obvious; the method of attack matters too though (that's why we don't let folks -- even in the US -- walk around with hand grenades). I heard on the US news (don't know if it's accurate) that the national Chinese news agencies were not airing this latest story, to try to avoid more copycat attacks. I haven't verified with my fiancee whether she's heard about it... those living in China -- was it on the national news?

It is sad that people target of all places schools. I'm not sure what the solution is. Sometimes I wonder if it isn't just a copycat syndrome. Heck, we have that in the US, too. This is shocking indeed; one difference it seems is that in the West most of these occur at high schools or colleges. Maybe because they're shootings instead of stabbings? If someone intends to kill others in the US, having explosives or guns means I don't have to care how big you are. In China, these folks, with knives and cleavers, appear to be looking for lots of defenseless people in one place so they can harm as many as possible before being apprehended. Armed with "only" a cleaver, adults might be able to fight back too much. With China's one-child policy, this kind of thing just adds tragedy to tragedy.

I think that's some of the best advice I've seen on this board, and goes for anywhere -- not just China.

Just saw this today: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/8658886.stm and wondered if anyone knows how easy it is now for PRC citizens to visit Taiwan -- do they still have to go as part of a tour? Looking for places to visit together (especially in winter) that are (1) out of the country so she can leave the PRC and then go back (maybe that will help later when I try to get her to the US), and (2) Chinese-speaking countries so she will feel at ease and I can continue to improve my Mandarin. Taiwan seems an obvious choice (assuming it's easy for a US citizen to get a visa).

One of my favorites, in the Zoo in Dalian, next to a Grizzly bear enclosure: "No Striding the Animal" -- like they REALLY had to tell me not to hop on the back of a Grizzly? After looking at the characters, I think they meant "Striking"

Good point Smitty; if it turns out there's not much to this (mistaken identity, no plates to show relationship to consulate, maybe resisting the handcuffs), then China's use of terms like "beaten" and (as I've seen in other reports of this story) "harassed and assaulted" are extremely irresponsible. I guess maybe they don't understand "innocent until proven guilty" or investigation before comment.

Looks like this is happening. http://finance.yahoo.com/ Click on "Report: China close to announcing currency revision" (sorry, the URL was too long to cut and paste here). Interesting article that outlines some of the back and forth within the Party on this issue. "The Chinese government is very close to announcing a revision of its currency policy in the coming days that will allow greater variation in the value of its currency combined with a small but immediate jump in its value against the dollar, people with knowledge of the consensus emerging in Beijing said on Thursday." "The model for the upcoming shift in currency policy is China¡¯s move in 2005, when the leadership allowed the renminbi to jump 2 percent overnight against the dollar and then trade in a wider daily range, but with a trend toward further strengthening against the dollar. For the upcoming announcement, however, China is likely to emphasize that the value of the renminbi can fall as well as rise on any given day, so as to discourage a flood of speculative investment into China betting on rapid further appreciation, they said." "China¡¯s commerce ministry, which is very close to the country¡¯s exporters, has strenuously and publicly opposed a rise in the value of China¡¯s currency over the past month. But it appears to have lost the struggle in Beijing as other interest groups have argued that China is too dependent on the dollar, that a more flexible currency would make it easier to manage the Chinese economy and that China is becoming increasingly isolated on the world stage because of its steadfast opposition to any appreciation of the renminbi since July, 2008."

Fascinating; it appears the banks' votes are in on this one...

Thanks for your reply . You are right , that's what they did on her Hukou. Just put a rubber stamp indicating they have divorced. The issue is now there is only one hukou . Her ex may want to use it and she will definitely need to use it too when she applies for her marriage certificate at the Ming Zen Ju office . She went to them to ask if they could make a certified copy and they said no. Also, PSB doesn't want to make a certified copy either. Really, it becomes two divorced parties need to hold on to one Hukou and they can't get a certified copy so each of them can hold on to one. Strange in my opinion ... Any comment ??? Thanks again. I hope this doesn't take us too far off topic, but my fiancee's first husband died in an accident some 15 years ago -- will she also have to get a new hukou or a stamp in her current one? Will she need other papers (death certificate or analogous Chinese document)?

Where is it that you want the relationship to "go"? language is wonderful in many ways -- it often contains depths of wisdom I too easily overlook. Relationships, I think, are always "going" somewhere: closer, further apart, stale, dying... If this is "just" a girlfriend (meaning you haven't decided to marry) then you're probably doing all you can do except add trips to China: there is nothing that can substitute for the intimacies possible in sharing the same physical space, and I'm not sure the relationship can go much further without that. My fiancee and I skype several times a week for about an hour, often text each other good morning and good night (that frequent light touch means a lot to me), sometimes email, and I send flowers or other gifts every couple of months. Other than that, what keeps us "going" is the quality of our conversations: besides the obvious smalltalk (what are you doing, how's the weather, how's Mom and Dad), we relive our moments together from the last meeting, plan for the next meeting, and of course exchange how much we miss each other, maybe we play some with each other. For example: it seems that every time Skype video doesn't work on her end -- about half the time -- she then tells me she's not wearing much (note to self: add "taking cold showers" to my list of daily activities"). I think, as others have said, you're doing about all you can; all that's left is to go see her, and of course take care of the quality of your exchanges.

Oh no, you don't get out of this that easily; you have lots to experience yet. Wait til that child brings home a significant other from another country and culture!

jin, what is your answer? who would you save? your husband or children, and please, only 1. husband of course, then can make more children . My son of course, only one of him but millions of women to replace wifey. sperm talking ? Read chinese romance and what a husband will sacrifice for the love of his wife, or a lovers to each other, maybe never marry,its both selfice and sacrifice mixed, all I try to do is help you think chinese women Thanks Jin, as you can see, you have indeed excited quite a few folks judging by the responses! What would a Chinese woman want a man to answer to this? Or is that a question that can be answered?

Jin, as you've figured out by now, Western men are absolutely no fun when it comes to this kind of game. I have a question for you: would Chinese men struggle with answering this as much as we do, or would the answer be obvious and easy for them? Tim

I'm a strong swimmer, so I'd want to take both of them at the same time; maybe we'd all three drown, but I couldn't leave either of them. Or else the wife would insist on my taking the child and leaving her back, which I'd probably then do. Remember this: "If me and Buster were hanging over a cliff..." the silliness of the commercial reflects, I think, the attitude most Americans (men anyway) have toward such hypotheticals...

First of all, I want to give kudos and gratitude to all posters on this topic: in the USA, we often stay away from discussing politics and religion because we all think we're right and we take our points of view very seriously on these issues. The posters so far have represented a diversity of opinions and have done so with great tact and mutual respect, which is wonderful. As for the OP's issues, it sounds like there is pressure felt to go to church and the OP is uncomfortable with that; whether that pressure is really coming from the friends or from something the OP is imagining is not for me to say. It is true that many Christians (as well as those of some other major religions) feel that part of their worship is to bring more people into their church; whether they do that for the glory of God or to make themselves feel more holy is also not for me to say. If I were in the OP's shoes, which I'm not (and I don't even know what the shoes would feel like because this is based on one posting), I'd tell the friends "when you ask me to church over and over, I feel like our friendship is dependent on my becoming a Christian. Is that the truth?" People in all kinds of groups (religious, political) are great at making "us versus them" realities for themselves (that's what gets us wars), and you're either in the group or you're one of "them." Asking them something like this directly might make them aware that they're making you uncomfortable, and it might have an affect on their behavior. I'd also ask this of these friends: "If I decide I'd rather become a Buddhist than a Christian, can I invite you to my temple and give you some Sutras to read and would you read them?" There are hypocrites inside churches and outside of them, and wonderful and spiritually wise folks inside churches and outside of them as well, in my experience. And I would never speak for God, but in my own heart I have doubts that God wants you to start going to church just to satisfy your friends' needs. All just the finite and limited point of view of one man, subject to change at any moment.

can we dream that someday China will be on that list?