Sleeping together can be tough

[tonado]

I talked in my sleep last night and she complained this morning.

As long as you wasn't calling another womans name that is ok.

She said just now "Don't snore and talk in your sleep tonight". Sure, I can really control my snoring and dreaming.

[oregonknl]

Tony,

 

RMark has some very good ideas... but one that I would like to add is exercise... Don't know what level is appropriate, but if you and her form a routine of early rising, and it could be any of a number of activities --- but it must be physically challenging for her --- in order of physical stress: (which is important) Brisk walking (40 min min.), hillside hiking (30min min.) Swimming (crawl or other real swimming --- not doggie paddle --- 30 min. min) Jogging (20min min.). Rowing (20 min min)

 

--- you get the picture --- my guess is that your Honey isn't getting to the level of physical fatigue that you are --- If she (and possibly, you too) do the early morning thing, I'm betting your problem will be solved. Sometimes, it might also include an after dinner walk, for both of you ...... Just don't see how she can stay awake after both morning and evening exercise......

[honeydooooo]

I am a light sleeper also,but i really found a good way to fall in sleep later: Using Ear Plugs!!! Pre-shaped foam Ear Plugs is much better than others. Just try it tonight and you will find it out.

[tonado]

I am a light sleeper also,but i really found a good way to fall in sleep later: Using Ear Plugs!!! Pre-shaped foam Ear Plugs is much better than others. Just try it tonight and you will find it out.

I bought foam ear plugs for her but she refuses to use them. She said they hurt her ears. Instead, she stuffs cotton ball in her ears which don't work well. My wife doesn't like to try new things. Last night, she slept better.

[alaskagypsy]

No I havn't introduced myself and my sweetheart yet. I am busy here getting ready for my trip to China August 14th - engagement trip. There are quite a few Chinese in Fairbanks, Alaska and it gets cold here. They seem to handle it well, better than me (I've been here 24 years).

I do plan to move to warmer climate - had planned to this fall, but my trip and engagement is priority one. May move to Santa Fe, NM. But may have to stay here while the Fiancees application is going through.

The select comfort bed works. I never wake myself up from snoring any more. Have even run a tape recorder and it records next to nothing. Once you find the right setting for the bed, you sleep like a rock.

[skibum]

Tony, How much time did the two of you spend together before getting married and why did the problem not show up then?

[Guest blsqueaky]

I have to say that Ling has the same problem at times, now and then I snore, she will tell me about, one night she caught me talking in my sleep, well 2 nights later, she was doing the talking.

 

When we are on the road, I pull a refer trailer, and she at times will complain about the noise, have ear plugs, she will not use, but when driving down the road, she will get in the sleeper and fall sound asleep. This I can not figure out. At home if I know that I am going to have a bad night, on the floor I go.

[tonado]

Tony,  How much time did the two of you spend together before getting married and why did the problem not show up then?

I guess not enough. On my first trip to Nanning, we went to Guilin together with her sister sharing one small motel room (two nights). She didn't complain about me snoring. Also, we took the train there and she had no problem sleeping by my side. On my second trip to Nanning, she didn't want to go on a small trip together. Her excuse was that it was too cold and the hotel won't have heat. She did tell me earlier that she does have a sleep problem. However, she didn't say that we won't be able to sleep in the same room. The funny thing we slept in the bed once she got here. She didn't complain much. After we got married a month later, then she started to complain more and more.

 

This is a serious problem because we might have to take separate vacations (can't even share the same hotel room or share a room when we visit family and friends).

[MarkLuvsShuPing]

Dude! Take another look at these suggestions, how many have you tried? The solution is here, something's got to work. Hell take your vacation money and buy a Select Comfort bed, there really is no reason to sleep seperately.

[oregonknl]

I'm With RMark ~~

 

I have seen this issue cause great distance in what was a close relationship (sleeping in seperate rooms)....

[skibum]

Tony,

 

Before spending money on beds and such, have a good talk with her and tell her that you will be sleeping together as is the American way. Ask how much money you should spend before she trys the ear plugs and simple things.

It does sound to me that she just does not want to sleep with you as harsh as that sounds but it seems like a problem that can be solved. You really need to get to the bottom of it and I will bet it is not noise.

Best of luck and you may tell her that the chicken will be frozen if she does not sleep with you!!

[TimD]

Hats off to my wife in this regard. I have always had a hard time sleeping if the conditions just weren't right. I need a cool room and some kind of background noise to sleep. I also normally go to bed around midnight.

 

Since I've been here we've adapted to each other sleeping habits. I now go to bed when Vicki does but I will stay up and read until I fall asleep. We sleep with the AC on, but have an extra blanket on the bed to keep her warm. I like a soft matress but she like a hard one, so here we got a stiff matress, and I've adapted to that.

 

In my opinion sleeping together is like eating together. It's give and take and compromise.

 

As a side note, even though we've been married for almost 2 years we're still on our honeymoon so sleeping apart has never been an option.

 

-Tim

[IceBreaker]

My fiancee said she liked my snoring. wow, maybe it's too soon to tell.

 

When all else fails, use chemicals. The sleeping pill Ambien works wonders (it's prescription only. Far better than any over-the-counter stuff.) I had terrible insomnia and this drug saved me from going insane. A good night's sleep is so important!

 

Of course one cannot rely on drugs forever. I think if men sleep on their side they snore less.

[tonado]

Harvard University is looking for volunteer for insomnia study. And my wife agrees to try it out. No drugs involved and all treatments are at home. I will call them to see if they will accept her. Participants will get $300.

[tywy_99]

Quite the thread, Tony! I don't know how I missed it.

So far so good on the snoring front but we share alot of the other issues mentioned. My wife said that the bed is too small. I tend to agree but haven't said anything. I have been thinking of getting a king size. The full size we have now is a little small. But that's the least of our differences/problems. I guess the biggest is our climatic differences. In the winter she kept the house cold and in the summer hot! I just can't understand it but a few weeks ago, I had all I could take! Working outside one very hot and very humid day, I come into the house to cool off where there wasn't any difference then being outside! I might as well have gone into the shed to kick back. I put all the windows down and cut the AC on until it got frigidly cold! The central air in this new house was the biggest thing I was looking forward to and don't hardley get to use it. What a bummer!

Anyways, that's some of our differences, yes, as hot as the weathers been, she wraps up in a comforter when all I need is a sheet!

Just have to grin and bear it, I guess..........

 

I hope you can get things worked out O.K, Tony. And that goes for everyone