Citizenship questions & result

[dcwfn]

Mei went to Norfolk this past Wednesday for her "interview". It definately didn't go well at all. In this case she had a young black woman to conduct her interview. If I didn't know better I'd swear that the infamous "Black Betty" from GZ is in Norfolk now. According to what she checked off on her evaluation sheet she didn't think Mei was able to speak, read, write or understand English well enough. Maybe it's because we've been married for 14 years now but it's probably a damn good thing I didn't get to speak to that female afterwards. There was/is nothing additional on the form to say what to do next or when to do it. Nothing at all. I have no idea whatsoever what to do next. We went through so much as some of you may remember just to get her back over here and this latest deal simply pisses me off. In short, I feel tapped. I have no more to give for this effort. All the way back to Richmond on I-64 Mei kept going back over the civics questions and listening to the audio cd that she irritated the hell out of me. Since we've been back home she has been a total pita. I'm done, where's the fork? I can count on one hand the words she has said to me in English since we got back as if this thing is entirely my fault. Maybe that's why or at least a part of why I feel so tapped out. Of course the "Little Emporer" (soon to be 29) is still at home. I honestly believe that he is maybe /not all of course but a big part of why she did not pass her test. Since he has been here since 07/2008 whenever both of them are at home there is only one language used and it isn't English. Yes, I've mentioned that to him several times and his response is always that he uses Cantonese because it's easier for his mother. Well guess what sunshine? Your idea sucks a big one! Look how it turned out! Thanks for letting me rant for a bit. I just honestly do not know which way to turn or when. Like I said, I'm done.

[Greg.D.]

Sounds like her crushing outcome for the long-awaited day caused her to transfer her despair to you - as in "this is all your fault". And, that does not put you at your best (not me either).

 

I can only suggest you try to control the things you can - which is yourself and your reaction - and try to be patient and forgiving. Try to see the big picture, say you will try to find out what you can do to fix it. Somehow you have to overlook the bad feelings of this weekend and believe the sun will rise again and you guys will be okay.

 

You may be right about the lack of English immersion contributing to her unsatisfactory performance. But you are also blaming the son, the gender and color and demeanor of the interviewing officer. And, Mrs.Dcwfn is blaming you, etc. You both are letting the events of the day and possibly the actions of other people completely unsettle your family. Hang in there, tough it out, you will come out of this and fix things.