Arrested, Jail, Stupidity in shopping. Asians Need to Run for Office.

[Doug]

The crazy thing is she really could have simply left the items with a clerk explaining to hold them while going to car to drop off the shoes, and came back for them, I am sure they would have not immediately sold the items.

 

Cooky logic I see here.

Of dourse I asked her about this and we discussed all the could have should haves. She felt sheepish because she did not want to let the other clerks know of her pending deal with the Chinese clerk upstairs.

[dnoblett]

The crazy thing is she really could have simply left the items with a clerk explaining to hold them while going to car to drop off the shoes, and came back for them, I am sure they would have not immediately sold the items.

 

Cooky logic I see here.

Of dourse I asked her about this and we discussed all the could have should haves. She felt sheepish because she did not want to let the other clerks know of her pending deal with the Chinese clerk upstairs.

Yep, a learning curve is needed here. No special deal no matter who you deal with in the store.

 

Most stores even Macy's, have a price honor guarantee, if something goes on sale within 30 days of purchase simply bring in the receipt and the store will give credit for difference, some stores even go as far as 90 days.

[Doug]

Another thing that seems to have been overlooked is she could be deported if convicted.

Thanks Carl. I know it is serious. She really was in a snit when me and a good lawyer told her all the things this might affect. Macy's could call her bank and report this which might get her fired. She got mader than hell in the car after this guy, but it motivated her to get busy finding a lawyer she can understand and work with. Another Chinese man lawyer told me how the Asians don't want to remember anything that makes them uncomfortable, true!!! They put off getting a lawyer with excuses they have other things to do. He said put their head in the sand, to be exact.

 

I just got off the phone with the best lawyer who is the American we visited, (he called me) and who has never dealt with Asians. He has been an assistant DA in this County and is the prosecutor in another city. He told me the other day I should have been a lawyer and told her that I am advising her correct, which just surprised her and made him her enemy. Yet he is the only one who wants to jump on this and make a lot of noise to the DA office to try to prevent charges being made. He agreed with me that this large community of Asians do need to rise up and run for public office and fix the DAs office and perhaps make some other steps or laws in the process. Why? : Becuse of what I wrote earlier. In the Chinese ladies lawyer office the assistant told me how there is this large volume of Asians getting into trouble like this. Like I told this American lawyer, here it is we have this large volume of well educated honest Asians who don't know so much about local law and never had local police help with anything back in their native country, but in America the police are involved. Here it is Asians who have no criminal record ever and live in large homes and have good jobs and do everything the best they know how are constantly being threatened with having a criminal record because of stupid stuff. (We really talked freely and I made a friend even though she will never use him. He was intrigued I help start a city and on city council. So he got the point of people making laws and things locally to help with their local problems and unique situations. People rule this country, but you have to get involved and make it your business. Weiyan always thought it was not my business to be on a city council. She was wrong. IMHO )

 

I could sit here and ask where is the America I grew up in where the store would call a relative or parents of a teen to resolve this outside of the police. I could talk about how neighbor knew neighbor, & etc. Well we are way beyond that these years. These folks need to run for office and build in systems and in this case put more people in the DAs office to handle dumbass stuff. And you guys need to warn your a spouse about things like this. I know Chinese don't like to think bad things and only deal with things as they happen. But it apears in cities North of Dallas there they are getting into trouble and the local government is giving no slack unless all official.

 

Again I didn't start this thread to bad mouth my ex. I just wanted you guys to be aware. More than my ex are getting into trouble.

Edited March 5, 2012 by Doug (see edit history)

[Doug]

Who is an Adopted Child Under the Immediate Relative Process?

 

Under this process, an adopted child is considered, for immigration purposes, to be the child (or adult son or daughter) of the adopting parent if:

• The parent adopted the child before his or her 16th birthday (or before the 18th birthday under certain circumstances as described below). You submit evidence of a full and final adoption
  

AND

• The parent had legal and physical custody of the child for at least two years while the child was a minor
  
  • The legal custody must have been the result of a formal grant of custody from a court or other governmental entity
    
  • The custody and residence requirement may be met by custody and residence that preceded the adoption
    
  • The two years custody and residence requirements are waived for certain abused children
    

http://www.uscis.gov...000082ca60aRCRD

 

Thanks. I will pass this on, which should end this. Her brother and her were just wanting to get the girl educated in America, without a private school where the kid can't walk that far everyday. If adopted they thought she could walk to school with Lil One everyday.

[Doug]

... my father's voice and me as a very young boy. I can still hear him say, "Ignorance of the law is no excuse!" What your ex-wife did was dumb ass. But, I will tell you that with my experience in China, dumbass works a lot. They are much more forgiving of the dummass plea, which does not carry weight in America.

My Dad told me the same thing several times growing up. I agree fully about your "dumbass" statements, . (I am jaking with words here a little, I agree fully with you!)

[Doug]

Golly Bawd Howdy Doody n' pop my dadgum suspenders!!! Doug, you do write up some very interesting storys. It's like you are a script writer for Seinfeld and a "bizaroo" version of the Honeymooners where Alice and Ralph's roles and personalities are reversed.

 

I am truly sorry you are having to live this comic book tale of craziness, and hope you find happiness in love without the egomaniac aspect.

 

I can hear the "defendant's" version of events in the courtroom now.

 

"Your honor,See, my friend in Macy's and I were going to pull a legal switcheroo on the clothes I had bought at a higher price then resale them to me for a cheaper price.....then I found 3, make that THREE pairs of thigh high boots that I just had to have, and I didn't want to walk off and lose the clothes. So I took them with me to the car, fully intending to come back inside and pay for them.

 

Your honor, it is all my damned ex-husbands fault here....that jerk wouldn't go shopping with me and carry my Melda Marcos's closet of boots out to the car for me so I could run upstairs and make the switcheroo on the clothes......IT'S HIM your honor, MY EX-HUSBAND, that should be standing here right now, not me.

 

I SWEAR I was going to come back in and pay for those clothes. HONEST I was !!!!! "

 

Or maybe she can try the ol' "cultural difference" plea...LOL

 

Hope it all works out for you buddy....damn if'n you don't tell some funny stories though.

 

tsap seui

 

Being our anniversary today me n' the lil' rabbit is off to play switcheroo in a jewelry store. Being Chinese she has to have Rolex and being American I thought she said Timex. Wish us luck. Do you think they'll notice I took the Timex apart and wrote Rolex on the face? I used an extra fine tip Paper Mate ink pen to write Rolex. If caught, maybe my wife could play the "cultural difference" card...or is that cultural immunity? I git so confused with all these here new terms.

TZapper you wrote this much more clear than I did. Haha, Thanks!

[tsap seui]

Doug, for your and your ex-familys sake I hope the woman gets off of this...and "maybe" even learns her lesson.

 

AS I do with everything for the past 5 1/2 years I have been on Candle, I ran this past my wife this morning. Her reaction...."woman stupid. This is not what China people do. China shop have camera, woman think American shop no have camera? China people understand is wrong to take and no pay.".

 

My wife sure doesn't think it is a cultural difference that your ex-wife didn't understand. I highly doubt you'll find too many other Chinese wives from Candle who would agree with that as an excuse.

 

Yes, long ago in small town America the shop keepers would hold a kid and call his/her parents instead of the police. Doug, that part of America is extinct. Business theft has become rampant and kills bottom lines every year. I've had business I owned that had thefts, even had thousands of dollars worth of tools stolen from my locked building when I was in patient in a PTSD clinic trying to get back on track in the human race. I can tell you I wanted BLOOD and a HEAD on a PLATE.

 

I highly doubt Macy's or Penny's or you name it are going to want to hear an excuse as lame as the one your ex has...especially if they knew the cute lil' scam she and her Macy's employee friend had cooked up. They are only looking at one thing here.... goods were taken out of their store without being paid for PERIOD.

 

I truly hope this woman gets out of this jam she created for herself.

 

But I don't think China with it's many faults teaches it's people that theft from others is okay....yes, in China bribery money gets paid to clear things up like in the crook who sold this woman's parents home to someone else. In America we don't call it "bribery to get things fixed....it's called "attorney's fees".

 

My wife ain't perfect by any means...and hell, after 5 years of reading on Cand about how Chinese women are "supposed" to act, maybe she isn't even Chinese, but I asked her if she thought she would ever do something like this, in China or America.....she looked at me, laughed, and asked me if I thought she and Chinese people were dogs who had had no upbringing by their parents.

 

If Chinese folks are getting prosecuted for theft, is it really because of a culture difference they didn't understand?

 

Good luck buddy. Looks like you are in for drama for a long time.

 

tsap seui

[Doug]

Tsapper, I am glad you told your wife. She needs to hear this dumnbass story as a reminder and that ignorance is no excuse in the law. BUT, it is Asian people putting things in their pocket and forgetting. It is people getting emergency phone calls, when there is a real emergency proved, and they run out of the store forgetting what else is in their hand. There are others stories. Yes she knew not to go out the door but got overly dumnassyfied. Some of these folks just get too dang excited or something and forget themselves, so I was told in lawyers office. I know her, how she is one high strung nervous twit I would never compare to any other Chinese woman for sure. Hey, she has a lawyer now. She can work this out, whether I think she is doing it the right way or not.

 

For anyone of any race, I just think with no pryor record there can be some kind of slack given for the circumstance, especially if there is a high number of cases. Think about the criminal checks and all the things these imigrants had to do to get here. I am just sayin... ...and they also need to get involved in Govt, IMHO, and if they do maybe they will be even tougher on themselves. Hahahaha

 

You know they have the large size thick Yellow Pages phone book all in Chinese and nothing but Chinese businesses. One big community here, but spread out enough so there is no defined Chinatown like in Houston/Bellair, TX. I did notice Asians holding public office down there - good for them!!!

Edited March 6, 2012 by Doug (see edit history)

[DennisLeiqin]

Tsapper, I am glad you told your wife. She needs to hear this dumnbass story as a reminder and that ignorance is no excuse in the law. BUT, it is Asian people putting things in their pocket and forgetting. It is people getting emergency phone calls, when there is a real emergency proved, and they run out of the store forgetting what else is in their hand. There are others stories. Yes she knew not to go out the door but got overly dumnassyfied. Some of these folks just get too dang excited or something and forget themselves, so I was told in lawyers office. I know her, how she is one high strung nervous twit I would never compare to any other Chinese woman for sure. Hey, she has a lawyer now. She can work this out, whether I think she is doing it the right way or not.

 

For anyone of any race, I just think with no pryor record there can be some kind of slack given for the circumstance, especially if there is a high number of cases. Think about the criminal checks and all the things these imigrants had to do to get here. I am just sayin... ...and they also need to get involved in Govt, IMHO, and if they do maybe they will be even tougher on themselves. Hahahaha

 

You know they have the large size thick Yellow Pages phone book all in Chinese and nothing but Chinese businesses. One big community here, but spread out enough so there is no defined Chinatown like in Houston/Bellair, TX. I did notice Asians holding public office down there - good for them!!!

I'd wager the judge will give ex-wifey community service for first offense. At least if they're anything like California justice. And, 40 hours of community service can seem like a life sentence to some - believe me, I know. She best hope that she doesn't spend the next 4 to 8 Saturdays wearing an orange vest picking up trash along the highways.

[IllinoisDave]

Thanks Doug, you've given me a good heads-up on something to warn Christine about. It's not about training. It's about avoiding potential problems that don't need to be. She still isn't driving yet so whenever she's gone shopping it's either been with me or one of her friends. I'm gonna definitely have a chat with her about being careful when she does go alone because she has a bit of an ADD problem when it comes to these things and I can see her walking right out to the car with stuff just like your ex did. That's if she can find the damn car to begin with.

[dnoblett]

Thanks Doug, you've given me a good heads-up on something to warn Christine about. It's not about training. It's about avoiding potential problems that don't need to be. She still isn't driving yet so whenever she's gone shopping it's either been with me or one of her friends. I'm gonna definitely have a chat with her about being careful when she does go alone because she has a bit of an ADD problem when it comes to these things and I can see her walking right out to the car with stuff just like your ex did. That's if she can find the damn car to begin with.

Have not learned to drive yet?

My wife was a hard learner but has had the driver's license long enough to get two moving violations, the first I insisted going to court, so she got a taste of court, got the speeding knocked down to failure to obey a traffic control device. Second one was for making a turn during a time that did not allow for making the left turn, she failed to see the sign, we paid that on online.

 

We had a chat tonight about this, getting into serious trouble with the law can be a big problem for green-card holders, I am glad my wife is well beyond this, and is a US Citizen, no worries about deportation. And yes when applying for citizenship, I insisted she note the two traffic infraction on the N-400.

[Doug]

Thanks Doug, you've given me a good heads-up on something to warn Christine about. It's not about training. It's about avoiding potential problems that don't need to be. She still isn't driving yet so whenever she's gone shopping it's either been with me or one of her friends. I'm gonna definitely have a chat with her about being careful when she does go alone because she has a bit of an ADD problem when it comes to these things and I can see her walking right out to the car with stuff just like your ex did. That's if she can find the damn car to begin with.

I was somewhere close one night and got a call. She had been shopping at the same mall. She looked for her car in the cold for over 2 hours and could not find it. I went and picked her up then got Lil One and found it after hours or early in the morning. Seems her panic button does not work for some reason.

 

ADD about shopping is a perfect description too. I have never seen such an almost out of control person. This really is a case by case judgment. Be sure and tell her it is the door where the store must stop chasing. The parking lot does not mean she has not left the store, some of her reasoning. car parking lots are seldom dealt with in China I imagine.

 

Oh and she has one moving violation going down a one way street strait into a cop. I hang up on her if she calls me while she is driving. Lets see 4 little wrecks in the new car and a couple in the first old one. She is better now. I have a garage I can put 4 Mustang size cars in, with an extra wide double door. I cleared it out as well as the driveway and still she manged to ram the the outside wall entering the garage, first wreck on the new one. Whatta Ya gunna do?

Edited March 6, 2012 by Doug (see edit history)

[Yuanyang]

Macy's has damn near everything in their stores with alarm tags. Didn't the alarm go off when she walked out (did I mis-read?)? You always stop. You turn around and walk back into the store. I know that. My wife knows that. If you keep on walking you will get arrested.

[Doug]

Macy's has damn near everything in their stores with alarm tags. Didn't the alarm go off when she walked out (did I mis-read?)? You always stop. You turn around and walk back into the store. I know that. My wife knows that. If you keep on walking you will get arrested.

Bob, actually she had an alarm tag on one of the return items at home, and no receipt so it must not have worked back when she bought them. She went to the Frisco Macy's and had a receipt reprinted and the tag removed up there first. I guess it did not work when she first bought the item. This was all part of the conversation between her and I that morning. We figured out and she verified that they can reprint a receipt from her credit cards. She was nervous about her whole day of shopping and really wanted me there for multiple reasons.

 

I forgot to mention I think, that on Monday when out of jail and before she even had a chance to brush her hair or clean up, she asked to go strait to the furniture store, and then the mattress store where a 1K bed marked down to 750 somehow she managed to negotiate a price of 629 and put down a deposit. So she finished paying for it, so Lil One had a larger bed. Then she still wanted to buy those clothes back from Macy's at the discount. All showed in their computer to be returned but the sales lady could not find any of it.

 

 

 

PS: It won't surprise me is she is in trouble again someday, not that I wish it on her. She pushes her daughter too hard and I think that is going to explode one day. Nothing will surprise me from jail time to going back to China for good, and it was my thoughts some time ago. Now that I wrote it, maybe it won't happen, I hope. I know this is opposite of Chinese thinking, never think about bad things or say them, but for me if I think it through and talk about it, then it doesn't happen. I am not superstitious or anything.

Edited March 6, 2012 by Doug (see edit history)

[dnoblett]

SHOPPING FOOLS. Best to avoid Macy's for a while. Direct her to Dillard's?