She lives permanently in Hong Kong, simpler K1 / K3 ?

[david_dawei]

THIS IS A LIFETIME COMMITMENT.. isn't it worth more than some chat and a single 1000$ vacation?

 

If you can't afford to invest more than a single trip in the relationship, how will you ever survive living together?

 

(Sorry, a little off topic, but sometimes I rant too.)

more good advice. If I had a dollar for every guy who starts this relationship posting on CFL with "I meet the love of my life" and then they come back a few years later to relate how all fell apart... I'd be a rich guy.

 

What most may not be ready to see is that their own honest motives for a relationship do not imply it's going to be "happy ever after".

[John Sawtooth]

Many thanks to all who have responded. Your advice is quite helpful.

 

I do in fact realize that 6 months of electronic communications is not the same as six months of seeing each other in person. We have happily not followed the common (?) trend of early and extreme enthusiasm. We're both quite candid and good communicators.

 

I have to consider this sort of interaction about the same as regular, brief 'coffehouse' dates, instead of something more profound. Still we've covered a lot of topics and worked through a few simple misunderstandings due to translation confusion. We're both amenable people it seems.

 

My Cantonese is of course novice level. Her English was in secondary school - so I'll see how much she has retained if any. We're both very literate in our native languages, so I am hopeful we will both progress in learning our new languages (I intend to continue studying Cantonese).

 

I am hopeful my trip from 30 September to 11 October will give us enough time together to test our ability to work through daily situations, test how robust our interest is, and truly assess what romantic spark we share. We're both excited and hopeful.

 

Thanks again for clarifying certain confusing aspects of this process - I don't plan on rushing. It looks like a second visit may be necessary , and I haven't met her family yet. We will have to see how the 'familial loyalty' aspect goes - though she is very independent with a good family relationship (and not an only child).

 

It seems like the HK residence and filing will have some helpful aspects if we ensure we are as legitimate as possible - thanks also for the idea of English tutoring and joint interview.