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credzba

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Posts posted by credzba

  1. When my wife came to America, she left a job as a senior supervisor at a pharmaceutical company.

     

    I make enough to support us easily, but she didn't want to sit around the house bored all day so she decided to get a job.

     

    She started out with a CNA certificate, takes 2 weeks of class, and a test, done.

    Jobs were easy to find, in fact she quit 1 job one morning, and had another that afternoon.

    However, CNA is the most degrading job I have seen, and it hurt my heart for her to do that job.

    The job is mostly taking care of obese people in poor health, or old people in poor health.

    Neither is easy, and both gripe and and verbally degrade the CNA that is trying to help them.

     

    It was a horrible job.

     

    Next she saw that a CMA had it easier, (certified medical assistant) all they did was hand out medicine.

    3 months for that certificate.

    They required she hand out medicine at the rate of 1 patient every 2 minutes.

    During that 2 minutes she was supposed to:

    push the cart to their room

    record the medicines being administered

    wash her hands

    prepare the pills, or whatever

    give the medicines to the patient

    wait until she saw them swallow it

     

    Keep in mind these are old, sick people. Sometimes it took 2 minutes for them to swallow the medicine, much less all the others.

    It was pressure, pressure, pressure ALL DAY.

     

    She quit the CMA job and went back to CNA work.

     

    Then, she tried massage therapy.

    9 months of school, and LOTS of studying then a test.

    She LOVES this job.

    People say "Thank you" when she helps them.

    People give her tips because they appreciate her work.

     

    In general, she can help people, and the work she does is appreciated.

     

    If I could suggest for you, skip CNA. Even RN, LVN nursing is a dirty job that my wife said she wouldn't want.

     

    Massage therapy, acupuncture, or a technician for sonograms or something like that, all are better jobs than CNA.

  2.  

    HI Joecy, glad to see you again! We are challenged not only with losing friends or being isolated. The big challenge is losing identity for us, the Chinese professional women who speak English. We are so much used working and interacting with people. You're also a people person by personality, I can see. I like your term of "transplanted" on the first issue of You May. We are really a growing tree being uprooted and transplanted into a new soil. So be patient. Allow yourself grow. We just need time to root ourselves again deeper into the American land.

     

    In my school book, there is a sentence like this, "What is heaven? Heaven is American house, Chinese food, French art, German car". I see American houses are very large with different doors and many rooms.

    Joecy, can you clean your American house the way you like in China?

     

    Catherine

     

    Catherine,

    You are so cute!

     

    No, I can't clean the American house the way I used to in China. The web mop won't work for carpeting. I still don't like vacuuming, the deadly heavy machine clunk my feet and it hurts every time! I'm not a good housewife, I do laundry once a week. Only clean the house if I can't stand it. And I'm pretty good at ignoring the dust, well, it's really not that dusty like in China.

     

     

    Joecy you do know you can replace carpet with wood or laminate flooring.

     

    In China, these things are all done by professional, but in America we do many of these things ourselves, and companies sell the flooring in such a way as to make it easy (easier anyway).

     

    So, if your bored .. you COULD replace the floor :)

    The true expert at this kind of thing is Tsap, as he has done tons of remodelling, but it is something you can do yourself, and then your house will be pretty, and easier to keep clean.

  3. What is a proper hug that won't make you or him feeling awkward?

     

     

    If I am in a situation where a hug is expected, but it isn't one of my family members i use a sideways 1 arm hug.

    I position myself so that my hip is next to their hip instead of face to face, and kind of hug their shoulder.

     

    It is not intimate, but meets the requirement of the situation.

    The difference for me is how much of my body touches their body.

     

    Outside people get a hip or shoulder touching, extended family, usually a cheek and I hug face to face, little kids I pick em up and hug them till they squeal, and the wife of course full frontal, and anything else I can get :)

    • Like 1
  4.  

    There is a more sophisticated argument for "frontloading" I-129F petitions, which is based on the notion that the U.S. consulate is not allowed to deny a petition based on a “re-adjudication" of facts already reviewed by the USCIS. The problem with his theory is that that U.S. consulates routinely disregard this constraint on their behavior. We've tried to argue it before the consulates many times and they simply ignore it based on their view that new facts have arisen during the consular interview and therefore they have every right to reassess the fiancé or petitioner’s qualification for the visa. The consular officers are especially emboldened by the fact that most of their judgments are subjective and that a consular officers decision may be challenged only based on mistakes in law, not on mistakes in facts or their evaluation.

     

    Yes - front-loading is NOT a time for true confessions or a confession of sins. Neither approval of the USCIS nor absolution by the Pope will let you off of THAT hook - the Visa Officer is REQUIRED BY LAW to deny your petition if he feels your relationship is NOT bona-fide. Don't help him out by front-loading the evidence.

     

    Front-loading CAN be used to good effect, however, by painting a picture of a loving relationship which will be in the hands of the VO at the time of the interview.

     

    Provide evidence which will HELP him approve your visa, NOT work against it.

     

     

    This makes so much sense, that I am surprised you even have to say it, but I am glad you did.

    Tsap is right, it is a crap shoot, but as in craps you should know your odds, and place your bet to give you highest possible chance of winning, even if its a loosing game.

     

    Front loading, as you say, is NOT a time for true confession. It is a time for YOU to know what your liabilities and strengths are, and to present the data to provide the best chance of your success.

     

    Reading that 19 page letter made me remember the process, and frustrated me.

    Will it move me to write to my congressman? Sadly, NOPE.

    There is no gain for me, I know that is selfish, but it has no upside for me to write congress, and has potential (albeit small) downsides.

  5. Blame the victim. Good job. Nobody has done it on a scale that the PLA has in the last 10 years. Are you defending them?

     

    Greg

     

    Yeah, I don't understand what your saying Greg.

    I was not meaning to blame anyone, just saying that corporate theft has been going on forever, and that internet form of corporate theft can be protected against.

     

    Certainly, if you leave the keys in your car while you run into the store, you don't expect it to be stolen.

    By that same token, if it IS stolen, your not going to find people as sympathetic to your cry of theft.

     

    Really, it just makes me tired the way companies act about this.

    There is no shortage of ways to protect themselves.

    Certainly there will always be thieves smart enough to find a way around todays defense measures, but if your secrets are very important, keep them off the network that has internet access. Doing that will provide 100% defense against network attacks.

  6. Greg,

     

    Corporate spying has existed since BEFORE the internet.

    Both domestic, and foreign companies and governments have attempted to steal anything that would benefit themselves.

     

    Of all the corporate espionage, internet attacks are the simplest to stop. If companies want to protect themselves, they can, even easier than the traditional attacks.

     

    I have no sympathy at all for a company (or government agency) who looses secrets or confidential data via internet attack.

    Worst case of all you totally separate your corporate network and the outside network .. cut the wire, its that simple !

     

    Obviously, there are reasons companies want to keep the networks bridged, but I don't listen to the poor me, I was infiltrated by those mean internet hackers.

    There are plenty of solutions, and if companies are not willing to protect their secrets, well then its public information in my mind.

    • Like 1
  7.  

    I see American men crazy in a different way.

     

    (1) They want to grow very tall so they get rid of their hair at a very young age. Without any blocks, they are growing taller and taller until some day they can reach the sky with their big hands. Why? Because they want to protect all the women and children in the world.

    Catherine,

     

    You have a beautiful way of seeing this.

     

    I heard lots of western man losing hair when they are young is because they are too CRAZY about exercising. Certain chemical produced from exercising result in hair loss. Then they just get ride of the rest of the hair and go bald.

     

    Not sure whether this is true?

     

    I don't know if exercise makes the hair fall out, or genetics, or maybe crazy Chinese wife ?

    Anyway, the process for me was as you say.

     

    Hair got thinner, I got tired of messing with it, one day while shaving, I just didn't stop till whole head was empty.

    Now, shaving in the morning is routine, the whole head gets shaved.

    The warmth and vibration of the electric shaver is even comforting.

    • Like 1
  8. When my wife came from China, we met some friends and ended up going to Chinese church on Sundays.

    Not being interested in the Christian doctrine, I sat listening and strengthened my Mandarin.

     

    I have mixed reviews on the church.

    At first it was a lot of fun for the Chinese ladies. All the "mixed" couples would bring food, and after the sermon we would meet in a room and eat and talk.

    Then, our success was our doom. One of the "leaders" started coming, and pushing after lunch bible reading.

    The time went from an hour or so for fellowship, to 2.5 hours of suffering.

    The ladies were not meeting to do bible study, they were meeting for friendship, as a result fewer and fewer people came, and lunch stopped.

     

    For me, this is standard Christian (perhaps all churches) behaviour. They were so interested in spreading their doctrine, they destroyed the fun.

     

    Still, the ladies stayed in touch, and so for that network the church was useful.

    The ladies helped each other with job ideas etc., but in fact it wasn't very beneficial.

    The problem is the ladies who come to America as wives have varied experience, skills, and education.

    As a result, what works for one is not practical for many of the others.

     

    I did see the church help women find jobs, but they were all very low level jobs (child care, cleaning etc.).

    Again, helpful for some of the people, but not a majority for sure.

     

    I think the churches can provide a network, people with a common language, maybe even job or transportation help, but you have to be able to tolerate their indoctrination process if you want what they offer.

     

    My wife finally went her own way, and seldom goes to church any more.

    I am still trying to get her to my Buddhist temple.

    • Like 1
  9.  

    I was traveling last Wednesday (July 9, 2014) to Beijing and was passing through the Seattle airport. I had about 1000 rmb's with me and thought, since I had some time, I could buy a bunch more in the Seattle airport, in the S gates area where my Hainan Airlines flight was departing. I noticed the Foreign Exchange booth was not posting their rates so I had to ask how many yuan she would give me per dollar. She said 5.3. I had a general idea it should be over 6 so said "wow" and kept my dollars.

     

    I just got into an ICBC here near my hotel today and got 6.145 per dollar. Maybe most of you know better (I think I usually change in the target country) but I post this here for some searchable content: if you can, buy most of your yuan in China. I traded 800 USD today; had I done so in Seattle, I would have lost 676 rmb.

     

    I'll try an ATM next.

     

    Greg

     

     

    I can get a similar exchange rate through my Bank of America ATM card, but they charge a 3% currency exchange fee, so it's not worth it. Banks are the way to go, but the ATM card would be more convenient.

     

     

    Randy,

    BofA used to be free at China Construction bank, did that end?

  10. Simpetus.

     

    You are a visitor to their country.

    EVEN If they required you to leave and re-enter the country every month you have only 2 choices:

     

    1) leave and re-enter the country every month

    2) leave and don't come back

     

    Whether in America or China makes no difference, you must obey what the government enforcers require. (note I didn't say what the law requires)

    In America, and in China you could go to the court, but there is no guarantee you will win in either country, and if you make the law enforcement officers loose face, in either country trouble will find you, especially if you win in court!

     

    We don't mind if you complain here, I would also complain, but do not cause yourself MORE pain than necessary.

    Work with the psb, do as they ask, and make them happy.

    My opinion is that in China, guan xi is often the best solution to problem.

     

    You are there, you know this, perhaps you just wanted to vent.

    • Like 2
  11. I hope some of my answers can ease your trials and tribulations. This is a new areana for you now. Look at your new journey as the great explorers did in the 1500s. One hell of an adventure. Its not going to be boring.

    Old Chinese proverb: “Experience is a comb which is given to you when you are going bald.”

    Good luck. :victory:

     

    (1) I can't stand the ice in any drinks. So I asked a cup of warm water at a restaurant but given a cold one. I was surprised. Then I was told they didn't put ice in my cup which meant it was warm. Later I had to explain that I needed hot water with hot vapor uprising above the cup. This time I shocked the waiter who asked me promptly, "Why? What for?"

     

    If you wish to have hot water with your meal order hot tea. They will charge you for it but don't use the tea bag. They are charging you for the tea bag not the hot water. In America we sell the sizzle not the steak.

     

    (2) I didn't understand, "Cash back" at the counter of a store, I was told to say no for the first time, so from then on I went to bank for cash.

     

    Cash back is a sales tool that helps the merchant build customer loyalty. It provides you an immediate or future discount on goods and services you need and want. It gives you/me the sense of getting a good deal. Remember a good deal is a state of mind.

     

    (3) I went to postoffice to mail a birthday card for my friend while my postbox was right standing in front of my gate.

     

    I don't really understand this last question. Sorry. :nonono:

     

    I think #2 "Cash Back" is referring to when you pay with an ATM debit card. There is an option to withdraw money from your account in excess of the purchase price, and receive the difference in the form of "cash back". Just as if you pay for a 5$ purchase with a 20$ bill, you receive cash back. With an ATM debit purchase you can receive as much back as you wish.

     

    #3 You CAN (usually) mail a letter from your own postage box. If your mail box has a metal flag on the side, this is used to tell the mail man you have outgoing mail.

    If you put a stamped letter into your mail box, and raise the flag, the mail man will collect the letter next time he comes by, and lower the flag.

    The dis-advantage to this is it could add a day to the mail time, because the mailman may not come by your box until 1 day later.

     

    This can get more complicated as some places have community mailboxes, and those have a special slot for outgoing mail.

    I am certain there are other mail situations, but most have some way to send mail as well as receive mail.

    • Like 1
  12. One of the mods here (Randy) lives long term in China, he is American citizen and his wife is Chinese citizen.

    I am certain he can tell you exactly what to do, and in fact I know there has been a discussion of this before.. maybe look some.

    Randy is on China time, so he wont be online for a bit yet.

     

    I'd give you the reference, but I forget where it was discussed.

    Seems I remember you just go to your local .. forgot the name .. the place your supposed to register when you stay in China, and show your marriage book, where you live with your wife, and whatever else they ask for, and they can upgrade your visa to a year or more.

    Then you just keep going back to get it upgraded each year, no need to leave the country.

     

    After some number of years living in China, I think they give you a long term visa.

     

    As I said .. Randy is the expert, so I am sure he'll tell you what to do.

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