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jasal

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  1. A snipet from a 34 yo Chinese woman's blog. She's a married K1 living in Oregon. With her permission, I am posting her blogs here. Maybe it will give a bit of insight into a Chinese woman's thoughts...maybe not...maybe, it will simply entertain...maybe not. :) She formerly made post here at the Candle... :o

     

    man&his woman---honor&disgrace together?

    When I worked for book department in a store, I sometimes saw a white man and his Japanese wife come to shop. When they came into our store, the man walked behind the wife by keeping some distance and watching around with caution. He seemed to worry about onlookers' attitude to them. When the wife asked me whether we had books about birds, I already could tell from her accent that her nationality was Japanese. She asked me my nationality and I told her I was a Chinese. We had a short friendly chat and I helped move a chair for her to stand on it when she could not reach the books on the shelves because she was only about 140cm tall. When the white husband heard his wife was treated with respect, he showed up from behind the closest shelf with some worrying expression just relieved but you could still see he was not spontaneous. I wondered if he was not comfortable to show up with his lady before public why he chose her? He looked a little ashamed of being with her. I wonder if he was not with this small asian lady but with somebody who could make him proud of according to the social criteria, whether he would still keep distance when walking with her to show that they seemed not related with each other.

     

    A man and his woman, when they choose each other, they should know from then on they will be together honor or disgrace---荣辱与共. They will face everything together, not that when something happens, one pushes the other out, instead of protecting and supporting each other. I often see when a man is very confident with a different race woman, people hardly feel uncomfortable with them, but treat them with respect spontaneously. If I notice a man keeps distance with me when showing before public, I am not going to give him more than three times chance to feel "ashamed" of being with me. The man that shows confident and strong before public with his woman is the one admired because he shows he is the master of his life and he lives for his own happiness, taste and desire.

     

    Expect to see more... :o

    Seems to me that she made an observation based on her own thoughts and opinions and not backed up by credible evidence that the husband was indeed ashamed to be seen with his wife. Making assumptions without facts is just as damaging as gossip.

  2. I :angry: hate to post a serious topic but... :huh:

     

    OK, for a couple of years now my wife has complained from time to time about our conversations. When I do it right she is very pleased with me and tells me so. Other times it goes South in a hurry and though I am told what was wrong, I just didn't get it until maybe yesterday.

     

    The subject was "How to be a good leader". She was telling me all about a questionnaire she read and thought it good material for her and her boss. So along the way I began to think of her situation and how to apply it to her so she can improve, WRONG.

     

    I can't help it. I try to apply things I learn to myself. My wife just wanted to discuss the topic without applying it to either of us. We talked about this for awhile and she informed me how her father listens very closely to what she says and it is enjoyable, she had talked to him that day. So we should just speak in academic terms? I know she does not like for me to relate any topic with something I know about or tell her of an example of the subject either.

     

    OK my wife has a few college degrees. Is it just academics or is this some cultural thing I don't grasp? My wife feels I am so self focused and selfish sometimes in conversation. I don't seem to have this trouble with others that I know of and she says that with me I am the only one she has trouble with.

     

    I don't know if I can explain what the whole problem is to be honest. I told her I felt we have some difference because I am doing what I always have and never had this trouble. I told her today that usually I have no idea what I did wrong in her eyes. She smiled and thanked me.

     

    Is it her, me, or does your spouse have some differences in conversation with you that make it un-enjoyable for them?

     

     

    Sounds like an American wife. But women are women no matter where they come from and trying to apply logic to what a woman does or does not do will drive you crazy. Women don't think or act the way we men do. You shouldn't have to apologize for being yourself. And where does it say that men should give up being men to please their wives? We're different for a reason and changing yourself will only make you into something closer to being a woman... dude, you're a guy, act like one and let your wife make some adjustments too. Why does every guy here always post that we men have to be more this or that, that we have to give up what and who we are... Our wives, be they Chinese or not, can make changes too. We don't have to give up who we are to enjoy our marriages. I haven't and my wife and I have an enjoyable and happy marriage.

  3. I must get out of bed by lifting with my arm, NOT swinging my feet in the air and then down to see-saw out of the bed. (British way referenced as correct.)

     

    Get foot surgury done on heel. (Embarressed how I walk, when her father comes and meets me.) (Think I will just wear a cast that month.) :crutch:

     

    Tidy-up the garage. Remodel kitchen. New tile floor, maybe have her father come help with this one, she says. (I'm having thoughts of --- wasn't it Carl who remodeled his house just to tear it down and put up a new one? Mine HATES log houses though she said last weekend it could look pretty good.)

     

    Put both arms on table when eating. (Chinese way, because less mess with food. DON'T put unused hand in lap, even if American or British manner.) (Contradicts British way of exiting bed.)

     

     

    All that matters is if you like the way she treats you (orders you). What the rest of us think really doesn't matter. The same situation wouldn't work for me though. I wouldn't/couldn't put up with that type of attitude. I get in and out of bed the way I want to. I walk the way I want to, etc... I don't tell my wife how to walk, sleep, talk and she doesn't tell me. It works out rather well this way.

    Don't relate any subject we are discussing to me or her. Just stay on the topic and don't apply it to own life. :Dah:

     

    Get back mobile phone money from ex-step-daughter for all months since marriage. :bangin:

     

    Well, ---- at least I DON'T have to replace a forboding mattress. Anyone else have orders?

  4. I'm sending in paperwork today for the I-485. I'm also sending in I-131 for Advance Parole. The fee for the I-485, including biometrics is $1010. When sending in the AP paperwork at the same time, is there an additional fee for the AP or is it covered under the $1010 fee?

    thanks everyone.

     

     

     

    Thank you very, very much.

  5. I'm sending in paperwork today for the I-485. I'm also sending in I-131 for Advance Parole. The fee for the I-485, including biometrics is $1010. When sending in the AP paperwork at the same time, is there an additional fee for the AP or is it covered under the $1010 fee?

    thanks everyone.

  6. Well, now that my Lily and I are together, I guess it's time to give my report on our interview. Sorry for the delay, but I wanted to make sure she got here OK before I said anything that could come back to haunt us. Her VO was a black man about 30 years old, and he spoke fluent Putonghua and Cantonese. Lily answered all the questions in English however. There was a younger white man and a middle aged white woman also conducting interviews. The white man gave the quickest and easiest pink slips, and the white woman's interviews were the longest. Here is about how the interview went:

     

    VO: May I see your passport?

     

    SO: Gives him both passports.

     

    VO: Briefly looks at both passsports and asks how many times have we met?

     

    SO: This is his 6th visit

     

    VO: How did you first meet?

     

    SO: On the internet

     

    VO: How long have you known him?

     

    SO: Two years.

     

    VO: May I see pictures?

     

    SO: Gives him 30 pictures spanning a 21 month period.

     

    VO: Examines pictures while SO explains where they were and when they were taken.

     

    SO: I also have e-mails and phone records, would you like to see them?

     

    VO: No. Do you know he is recently divorced?

     

    SO: Yes, would you like to see his divorce papers?

     

    VO: No, Have you met his parents?

     

    SO: No, but I have talked with them on the telephone.

     

    VO: No. Does he have children?

     

    SO: Yes.

     

    VO: How Many?

     

    SO: Answers question.

     

    VO: How old are you?

     

    SO: Answers question.

     

    VO: (Looking surprised) So you were XX years old when you met?

     

    SO: Yes

     

    VO: Let me see his divorce papers.

     

    SO: Gives divorce papers

     

    VO: Examines the divorce papers for about 5 minutes, briefly consulting another official.

     

    VO: How old are his children?

     

    SO: Answers question.

     

    VO: What do they think of your marriage?

     

    SO: Answers question.

     

    VO: How many times have you met (second time asking this)

     

    SO: This is his 6th visit.

     

    VO: May I see his taxes

     

    SO: Gives entire folder with all financial information.

     

    VO: Examines documents carefully for a few minutes

     

    VO: Hands documents back and asks how many children does he have? (again)

     

    SO: Answers question

     

    VO: May I see a copy of his passport (asks for this despite having seen the original)

     

    SO: Gives him a notarized copy of my passport.

     

    VO: Looks it over carefully, hands document back.

     

    VO: Why do you want to go to the USA?

     

    SO: To be with my fiance because I love him.

     

    VO: I am concerned that because of your age difference that you may not have a genuinine relationship with this man.

     

    SO: I have know him for two years and we love each other very much.

     

    VO: I will give you the visa but I am still a little concerned.

     

    SO: Thank you.

     

     

    I found it very interesting that he asked for the copy of my passport at the end of the interview when he had already looked over the real thing. It kind of confirmed a theory I have. Some on this site believe that they decide who they are going to pass or fail prior to or during the interview. My view isn't quite so jaded. I believe they DO decide who they will scruitinize before and during the interview. If they see something they don't like, they look for I's that aren't dotted and T's that aren't crossed. After all, this is America, they can't discriminate on the basis of age, sex national origin, right? But they will take any factor they decide they don't like and then sruitinize the application for very minor things they could give a blue slip for. In our case he looked for the copy of the passport. If she didn't have it, I bet Lily would still be waiting in GUZ for her overcome appt. right now. The VO already knew we had the rest of our bases covered.

     

    I really believe they they will scruitinize a application they are not happy with for whatever reason by going after specific things like SSN and residence evidence for EX's, lack of a common language between petitioner and beneficiary, presence or absence of statements of relationship between petitioner and beneficiary and petitioner and EX, and even a notarized copy of a passport when they have already seen the original as well as other tickytack paperwork deficiencies.

     

    I hope this helps any of you that are preparing for your interview.

     

     

     

    Congrats!! May I ask what is the age difference between you and your fiancee?

  7. I have a question for those guys that have their Chinese wives already over. I was chatting with my fiancee this morning about things we will be doing once she is here. She brought up a remark that I had never heard of and wondered if it were true with other Chinese wives.

     

    She asked me that when she was having her monthly period, if I would help her wash clothes and do the dishes, etc. I said I have done these chores for many years and don't plan on stopping to do them once she arrives. I asked her why she asked, just during her period. She said that during her period she does not touch or drink any cold/cool water. To do so would be bad for her health. She does not wash clothes in cold water, clean dishes or any chore that involves the use or drinking of cool water while she is having her period. I have a gynecologist friend at UTMB that I want to ask that question to. I have never heard of this in any of my previous relationships including a Japanese. Doing the chores are not a problem, but it is a cultural thing that I had never heard of. Anyone out there familiar with this issue?

     

    As aye,

     

    Jim

     

     

     

    Shortly after my SO arrived in America she begun her period. She refused to drink or eat anything cold until her period was over. I had never heard of such a thing and thought she was a bit nutty. I went online and typed in a search on Yahoo asking if there was anything to this. There must have been 8-9 articles about this. Apparently there's some truth to it... that women on their period do not need to be eating and drinking COLD drinks. It didn't say anything about touching cool or cold water.. just drinking it. And these were webpages from American doctors, not Chinese doctors.

  8. its all in your attitude....

    if you wanna be depressed about life in the US of A...

    im sorry to tell you but you aint gonna be happy anywhere.

    The cow always sticks his head through the fence for better grass.

    and you got the freshest grass in the world right now in the States.

     

    i mean if your girl is currently living in BeiJing and she moves to a place with one traffic light and one store in a town of about 300...

    this is just not going to be an easy transition, ontop of everything else she will endure for leaving everything she has ever known.....be ready.

     

     

    I agree with IZUS and I'll go one step further. America has many faults and definitely needs some changes. BUT.. having been to many different countries over the years and having enjoyed each visit to those different countries, I wouldn't swap any of them for my little piece of America. Dullsville? Uncle Samville? Hmmm.. I think that maybe it's not America that's dull and boring but maybe the way you live your lives. You can be bored to death and be living in Paradise, but isn't life what we make it? I'm not one that needs to hit the party scene nor is my SO. We both love to read, go for walks, do simple things and just enjoy being together. When we want to be active and go and do things, then we do... and when we want to be lazy, then we do that too. My city is small (100,000) compared to my SO's hometown of 10 million. She has always wanted to have a quieter life with not so many people crowding around. America is still a great place despite it's many faults and I kind of like it where I'm at.

  9. Just a silly question, but I thought I would ask now before I leave. My Chinese Visa is set to expire on the 8th of September. I am leaving for China on the 18th of Aug for a month, returning on the 17th of September. I will be in China 11 days after my Chinese Visa expires.

    I heard, do not know if this is true, that as long as it is valid when I enter, it is OK if it expires while I am there. If this is not trure I need to pay for a new Chinese Visa ASAP.

     

    I do not need a hassle at the airport as I am about to get to my plane to return to the states.

     

    Thanks

    You are good to go my friend. You will get no hassles. I arrived in china with only one day before mine expired and no trouble whatsoever.

     

     

    I guess China is different than Russia. I was in Moscow about 6 years ago and my tourist visa expired due to some unforeseen events that kept me there 5 days longer than my visa was good for. As I was departing Moscow at the airport, I was pulled aside, taken to an interview room, asked many questions about why I hadn't departed prior to my visa expiring. Bottom line was that after a 30 minute lecture about what they could do to me in such events, I had to pay $100 on the spot and they extended my visa by one day and then after getting that stamp in my passport the immigration folks finally let me through and I was able to catch my flight (barely). Since that eposide, I've always kept my visas current and travel within the set timeframes.

  10. As some of you know, my former SO got cold feet at the 11th hour. It was too big challenge for. She was Director/Controller of a bank. She held a fairly high position in the party. She had a lot to give up and her future was promising. She looked and found the smallest things to worry about and turn them into red flags, in her mind. In the end, I understood that I can never lose what I truly never had.

     

    Give her space? Yes. That means no emails. No phone calls. No correspondence for a few days. Tough to do after being conditioned doing it for so long, but you've got to let her breath and think things through. It's her call not yours. And, no amount of pleading and cajoling is going to change her mind, especially after this long of time together.

     

    Just my very humble opinion...

     

    Good luck and stay strong.

     

    she already said she wants to be friends and split, you think she might come back to me after giving her some space?

     

    what is SO? and did you run into problems with her Dennis?

    so significant other, by bhe by I have a wife not a so :D

     

     

     

    Seems to me that she's already made up her mind. You can give her all the space you want, but based on any relationship with any woman, when they say they want to be only "friends", they generally mean exactly that. As a man you're expecting her to act like we would act in a similar situation, but women don't think that way.... No matter how hard it'll be for you, it's time to move on. Going back to China won't make it better and you'll just be wasting your time and money. In the end, you'll be much better off finding someone who's completely committed to you and moving to the U.S. to be with you will be at the top of their list of thing they want to do. An old saying holds true... "If in doubt, don't."

  11. So it's a deep-southeast thing then--probably like Mexico and Central America: too hot to do anything else. My visit to Guangzhou was my only SE experience. I've only been a little south of Shanghai, southcentral as far as Shangri-la, central to Jiuzhaigou, and northeast to Shenyang.

     

     

    Many years ago I dated a Korean woman from Seoul. She napped EVERY day. She had live in U.S. for about 2 years, attended graduate classes at an American University.. but she still napped for about 2 hours EVERY day. My Chinese fiancee takes naps also. I know that many times when we've talked on the phone, she's told me that she's going to take a nap.. normally around noon.. but sometimes later. The company where I work only allows 30 minutes for lunch. An hour would be much better. I may want to take a nap after lunch but I know that if I was given a one or two hour nap time, then I wouldn't want to go back to work.. my momentum would have been broken and my desire to work would be gone. I live in the deep south and our summers are HOT and very HUMID. If anyone should need a siesta, then it's us. But alas, work is called that for a reason.. you work and naps are taboo. When my SO comes to live with me in America I'm sure her nap routine will continue and if/when she goes to work, then it'll be hard for her to adapt to not being able to take a nap when she wants to.

  12. What is ACH? I've seen this abbreviation in the Interview forums, but a search for this brings up nothing. What does it stand for? I suppose it is an information session before your interview. Am I right? If so, how do you set it up? Thanks.

     

     

    American Citizen's Hour (ACH) For K-1 Fiancee Visas it's on Fridays at 2:20 p.m. You don't need an appointment. Just go to the American Consulate around 1 or 1:30 p.m. and go up to the 5th floor and get in line. They take you through a metal detector and you stand in line for a number. You sit down and wait for your number to be called. You then can go to the window and ask a VO anything you like about your petition. They do give you a form to fill out prior to you talking to a VO. You're supposed to give it to the VO at the window. On the form they ask for your SO's GUZ number and name. You're also supposed to write down on the form what questions you might have. Some question whether going to ACH is worth it or not... but for me it wasn't such a big deal. I went to the Consulate at 1:45 p.m. went in and stood in line for about 10 minutes... waited for about 30 minutes to talk to the VO. Spent about 5 minutes with the VO and left. The VO was very nice and made some good comments on my file. I think going to ACH is simple and painless. Does it help? Hmmm.. can't say for sure, but it doesn't hurt either.

  13. America has many issues and problems... the main one is obesity. Americans are too damn fat and lazy. We are fast going the way of ancient Rome wherein we think we are the best... and we've become too relaxed in our way of life, too sensitive about everyone's "rights" and not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings. Hogwash!! Everyone needs to get a good spanking if they do something wrong. Kids playing inside on computers instead of outside is the parent's fault. Kick their fat butts outside and make them play outside and actually interact with the other kids in the neighborhood. As for Chinese technology.. do you mean all the things they copied from us, stole from us...?? American medicene isn't perfect but neither are herbal remedies. China is fast becoming the number one polluter on the entire planet. Do they care? Nope. They want what they want and they want it now and aren't willing to pay for immission control, at least not until the government can make a dollar from it. Right now funneling American and European money into their confers is much more important than human rights or pollution control. Given all the facts, right or wrong in how Americans perceive Chinese people, do you want to live in China or America?

  14. Where in Alabama do you live? I live in Anniston which is about 50 miles east of Birmingham. My last wife was an immigrant... she was from Uzbekistan. When we had our Adjustment of Status interview it was in Atlanta and they did the fingerprinting there in Atlanta. But when she needed biometrics done (fingerprinting) for something to do with her 10 year green card, she went to Birmingham to do it.

  15. My SO speaks almost perfect English (is there such a thing), so we don't have many issues with misunderstanding most things. No Chinglish words. The only time she uses chinese is when she talks to her parents on the phone. With me everything is always in English. She was using English curse words long before we met and she knows what they mean and when you're supposed to use them and when you're not. As for "sleep" in your eyes, she calls it "stuff", the same as boogers in your nose. I can see where it would be difficult explaining to someone how you can have "sleep" in your eye and "boogers" in your nose. But... if you live in some regions of America.. the thing you use to put your groceries in at the store is a cart.. other regions it's called a buggy. And if you're going to take someone somewhere in your car.. some people in the U.S. would say... "I'm going to take your Mother to the store." Other people would say.. "I'm going to carry your Mother to the store." Seems okay to most of us.. but some might think to themselves, "carry" them to the store, they're going to "carry" them? We have alot of strange idoims in the American language that will forever be hard for us to understand, so how much more so for our chinese wives?

  16. Aren't "ignorant" people fun to deal with? They only have one point of view (their own) and seem to ignore that anyone else might have a different opinion. Maybe your cousin should be reminded that all of us are immigrants to this country and that at some point in time, our ancesters lived in some other country and "immigrated" here to the USA. Speaking of American citizenship... the people who live in areas designated as American-held terroritories such as Guam, Wake Island, Puerto Rico, American Virgin Islands... have all the benefits of American citizenship without ever actually being one. My only take on immigration is that EVERYONE that immigrates here should go through the paperwork process and become legal... even if it takes many years. Crossing the border and entering this country illegally shouldn't be tolerated and those people should have NO rights in our country at all. They should be found and returned to their country of orgin. If they want to live in the U.S., then file your paperwork and wait to enter legally.

  17. I don't know anything about Mr. Yang or the other place in the consulate building. I've read everything posted here about those two places and everything seems kosher, but I suppose anything can happen, even with the Yang's. You had a very bad experience, something no one wants to go through. Thanks for posting it. My SO and I stayed at the Victory Hotel on Shaimen Island the first time I visited Guangzhou (July 2006). Great place!! The Island itself is a wonderful place too. I got great rates (only $35.00 a night), room was extra clean and bed was actually "soft" in comparison to most beds in China. But Shaimen Island is a bit far from the Consulate so we elected to stay closer for our interview trip. We stayed at the Concordia which is an apartment complex (30 story building and it's all apartments). There are several more in this same complex. They form a kind of circle around a huge swimming pool, tennis courts, garden area and place where kids can play safely on playground equipment. Our apartment was on the 5th floor, the A/C worked great, computer hookup and use included in price of the room. An oven, a washing machine, a microwave, nice size refrigerator, sitting room, small kitchen, nice bathroom and the atypical "HARD" bed. Lots of TV channels (mostly Chinese but 3 were English). Apartment was cleaned every day. You call ahead and check on availability of apartment. If they have one, they'll hold it for you. We didn't pay them any reservation money, we paid them the day we arrived and the room was ready. They have a security guard at the ground floor door. You have a key to your apartment and a card that you use to open the ground floor door (security card reader just outside the main floor door to the building). Security Guard stayed outside the door most of the time we were there but he also has a station just inside the door. Our daily rate was $32.00 USD a night. I paid for 10 days and other than the extremely HARD bed, the place was very satisfactory. The Concordia is located about 2 blocks to the left of the Consulate on the same side of the main road, less than a 5 minute walk, and sits kind of behind the Consulate on a smaller side street. No touts, no shills bothered us. Lots of small stores to buy some food items, you can walk to the subway (5 minutes) and ride over to T-Mall if you want to see a movie or do your shopping there. There are tons of places to eat within easy walking distance. I'm not telling anyone to stay at the Concordia Apartments, but it was a nice enough place at a good price. Just offering an alternate place to stay when in Guangzhou. And yes, the brand new Westin Hotel next to the Consulate is open and is super nice. We walked by it many times. Always very busy and I'm sure it also has the 5-Star price, but if that's your thing, then it would be the place to stay.

  18. I'm just back from Guangzhou. I went over for my SO's interview, which was on June 26. I went earlier enough to make ACH on Friday, June 22. There were alot of people at ACH, mostly blue slips and a couple of white slips with questions. There were a few K-1's (like me) there to ask some questions. The line was long but the wait was only about one hour and I was number 41. The VO was a young white woman and she was very nice. My SO had made a one page list of all the items that we had and I asked the VO if I could give the list to her and have her look at it to see if we might be missing something important. She took the list and looked it over and said everything looked very good. She then typed in her computer that I had attended ACH and that I was there showing support for my fiancee. She also typed into the computer on our file that in her opinion everything looked very good to her and that our documents and paperwork was in order. That was it. I didn't really have any questions for her. Time at the window, about 5 minutes. My financee went to her interview the following Tuesday, waited a total of 3 hours from lining up outside to getting her pink slip. Her VO was a young white guy who only asked her a few questions such as how many times had I been to China to see her, looked at some of our pictures together, commented favorably on the pictures of my fiancee and me with her parents. He didn't look at any of our emails, took only the certified tax returns (2006, 2005 and 2004). He didn't ask for the I-134 or any other paperwork that showed my financial position. I had included all that with my original I-129F paperwork. He didn't ask if my fiancee belonged to the Communist party (she doesn't). He did ask one question about my previous marriage. That was it. He was very satisfied with our documentation as presented with the original I-129F. I had included tax records, letter from my bank, supervisor, had submitted additional informaton why my previous 2 marriages had ended in divorce, included both divorce papers. I'm thinking that since I had included so much documentation in my original I-129F filing with USCIS is why the VO didn't ask alot of questions or request very much additional paperwork. My fiancee has never been married with no issues in China. She's a university graduate. I was married 19 years to an American for my first marriage. About 7 years after that divorce I married again, this time using the K-1 finance visa. I was married to her for 6 years and she and I divorced. She already had her 10 year green card and she stayed in the U.S. after our divorce. She changed her name back to her maiden name, filed for a name change on her green card. I explained all this with letters in my I-129F submission to USCIS. About a year or so after that divorce is when I met my current fiancee. We courted for over 6 months before meeting for the first time. I went to China 3 times. I'm 32 years older than her. Our case seemed to suggest that we might have some "red flags" based on the dialogue that you read on CFL and I was a little concerned that we might get a blue slip for additional information. My fiancee had two packages of pictures, all the documents that they would normally ask for and many others that they "might" ask for. But in the end, not so many questions, no requests for additional information or documents. Age difference wasn't discussed by the VO. Pink in less than 10 minutes. Two days later, we picked up her passport with the fiancee visa in it. Sorry for such a long post. I thought maybe some of the info might help someone else.

  19. Or..........as my very cynical SO just pointed out, maybe the number of pink slips will be going down over the next month so the USCIS can hit them with that new fee increase.

     

    Geez, she's even getting more cynical than me now, hahaha :unsure: p)

     

     

    Too cynical. The Consulate is Dept. of State, which has nothing to do with USCIS. Two different governments. The increase in fees at USCIS has absolutely nothing to do with DOS and DOS doesn't benefit from any of those fee increases.

  20. Jim, interesting post that seems to be getting a lot of attention.

     

    I see many of the same, "new is better" comments, but it's important to frame it properly. Let Jen know that these things are of interest or important to you. Hopefully, she will see your meaning and respect your opinion even if she doesn't share it.

     

     

    I agree with you. Everything should be taken in perspective. You like old things. She doesn't. Maybe the "old" Chinese stuff offended her... find out if it's just that or if she has no interest in anything that's old. If that's the case, then it's time to mend any broken fences with her, but you can't just quit being yourself and stop liking things you like. You're not perfect but neither is she. I've learned that the cold shoulder that always works when our SO's give it to us, is equally effective when we give it back to them. Marriage is about both of you... both of any of us who are already married or getting married. Why do we men always catch the blame and the "coldness" when a good deed turns sour? There may be cultural differences but what I see is just the normal, everyday "women versus men" outlook on life. Men see the world one way and interact in it according to a few, basic rules. Simple, effective.. Women see this same world in a completely different way and their rules change from moment-to-moment and you'll never know what rules she's applying, so don't even try to figure out their system. They don't have one, least not anything we men can understand. She'll forgive you when she wants to and not a second before.

  21. Many Civil Surgeons don't understand the K-Visa and like to insist on full medical, we had this problem, and the solution is to take form I-485 instructions with you to the doctor, and point out the USCIS instructions for K-Visas. I pointed this out to the doctor and he stopped insisting on the full medical and did the supplement for $35.

     

    Highlight this on page 3 in the instructions and show to doctor:

    Fianc¨¦(e)s.

    If you are a K-1 fianc¨¦(e) or K-2 dependent who had a medical examination within the past year as required for the nonimmigrant fianc¨¦(e) visa, you only need to submit a vaccination supplement, not the entire medical report. You may include the vaccination supplement with your adjustment of status application.

    http://www.uscis.gov/files/form/i-485.pdf

     

     

    I was under the impression that if you were a K-1 and your SO had a medical examination within the past year (such as the one she got in Guangzhou prior to her K-1 interview) then we wouldn't have to go to a Civil Surgeon at all. But we would need to submit vaccinations with the AOS paperwork. Am I right in my assumption or way wrong?

  22. It has been six weeks since my fiancee has mailed the P3 forms. GZ tells me they have them processed and the background check is done, but no interview date yet. Is this normal? I don't recall anyone else having to wait so long....

     

     

    thanks,

    Jeff

     

     

    Ours took nearly 8 weeks from P3 to P4. Others that submitted after us got theirs before us... and that nearly drove my SO nuts. Finally we got our P4.. interview date.. she's already done her medical and got the results back... sealed envelope, chest X-Ray and all. We're just waiting on the interview to happen (26 June). Good luck. I hope you get your P4 very soon. Calling DOS.. (after recording comes on, hit 1, new recording, hit 0 and then you're in the waiting queue for someone to help you. I never waited more than 10 minutes for a live person to come online to answer my questions.)

  23. Each year, I was giving up one foot, 6 inches etc... of easement to the city of Murrieta, California because of municipal development.

     

    Started off with a nice plot of land and it was so changed by the time I sold. My great view I had really bought that house for was blocked by development.

     

    Growing pains I guess!

     

    My wife's friend is from Chongching and knows where that development is (She said)

     

     

    House of Nails is now gone. They tore it down. They dug away more of the hill and then a tractor climbed the hill and took the house down one piece at a time.

  24. My fiancee and I began this journey back in August 2006 and recently we got our N0A2 approval from the California Service Center. We're now waiting for it to arrive at the NVC. My fiancee was talking to me today about something she was concerned about when she went to the interview in GUZ. She's concerned because I had a previous K1 approval from 6 years ago, a marriage that ended in divorce. Even though that K1 didn't involve anyone from China (it was Uzbekistan), my fiancee is worried that the previous K1 on my record will convince the VO at GUZ to give us a white slip. She had read on the Chinese forum where an American man had a previous K1 that ended in divorce (his previous K1 was from the Philippines) and the VO asked that Chinese fiancee for his passport and tax returns. Then without asking for any further paperwork or evidence or asking her any questions, he issued a white slip and asked the Chinese fiancee to leave. My fiancee seems to think our chances at the GUZ interview are not very good because of my previous K1. Does anyone know of any such instances where the Chinese fiancee or wife is turned away with a white slip or even a blue slip because the American citizen had a previous K1 that ended in divorce? Thanks in advance for any enlightenment.

  25. :huh: I got my N0A2 in late November from CSC. The hard copy said that my petition had been approved and was being sent to the consulate that I had listed in my petition. It said if I had any questions regarding the status of the petition that I should contact the consulate. When you folks got your N0A2's did it say that it was going to the consulate or to the NVC? A couple of people at VJ told me that their N0A2's said their petitions were being forwarded to the NVC and gave specific guidance on how to check on their petition at the NVC. I called the NVC but never got a live person, so I input my WAC number into their system and it said no record of my petition was in their system yet. I'm concerned if my petition is still sitting at CSC, is in transit to NVC or is in fact headed to GUZ, having skipped the NVC based on what my N0A2 says. Any and all thoughts/answers are welcome.
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