lele

I completely agree! I really most enjoy the *authentic* spicy Chinese foods: sichuan, yunnan, hubei, hunan, chongqing. I also appreciate other *authentic* spicy foods, such as Vietnamese, Thai, Malay, most of the main varieties of Indian food, etc. However, I like my food, when it is supposed to be spicy, to be spicy (like the time that I won money outeating all of the Chinese people in Chengdu). I also like my sour food to be sour and my vegetables and herbs to be fresh! I too do not appreciate guangdong food too much...if I wanted to eat that, I would get Vietnamese instead (and since I do not eat exotic animals, I guess that I do not need that aspect of it...remember, it was an exotic animal being eaten which started the spread of SARS). However, after I returned from China for my first time, I was never able to eat anything other than Authentic Chinese again (luckily in NYC there are a few places where one can at least get suantaiyu or shuijuoyu...but the authentic peppers, I still miss them...). I can still eat other varieties of SE and S Asian foods, but even then, I have become picky. *sigh* --- However, for spicy, so far Laos is the top! It is the only place I have ever been that I once had food too spicy for me. They served me this delictable shrimp, lime, mango, and chili salad. I told them I wanted it hot, and they did not believe me, so they cut up and mixed it up with 8 hot chillies. I tried some, and did not drink any of the coconut that they left for me. So, after two bites, they took it back and said that they would give it to me for real, and they added some more chillies to it. I must admit, after about 1/2 of it, it was too much for me, and that coconut tasted so good! It turns out they added 22 more chillies, to make the total of 30! **sigh** but the sweet, sour, and spicy taste together were really good.

I just got a friend of mine a ticket from Boston to Beijing for 795$US round trip (after all taxes and fees). From Beijing there are many planes every day that go to Chengdu for about 1200RMB, or about 150$US (or you can take the train if you have the time...which is far cheaper but will take 1.5 days), but this company can get it for you for 40% off too. However, the catch is that the airplane company is located in New Jersey (but an e-ticket was issued, so it was a piece of cake). I will not place an ad here, so send me a PM if you want any info on this option.

Actually, a V-nickel, even if in poor condition (you can just make out the V) is worth *at least* 10$US...but if it is in decent condition, it can be worth even more. I made a mint at a market once by purchasing an old "silver dollar" for 2$US...it turns out it was worth about 80$US to my father who collects coins, and he ultimately sold it for 85$US (naturally, since we are family, we do not pay each other money!). The best mistake of all (and if you can find one of these, I will pay you $100 for it) is a 1942 over 1941 dime (you can see that it initially was minted as 1941, but then a 2 is placed over the 1 on the coin).

It was in the topic header for this thread...at least that was my interpretation of it!

Thanks for the correction!!!

Best of luck to you in this intolerable situation. However, I hope that you have taught her to simultaneously juggle 2 razor-sharp knives, a flaming torch, and a live cat, just in case they ask for that one too...

You really got the money back? Wow! Is it *possible* that there was just a very high level of miscommunication and that it is worthwhile taking the risk to see things continue forward, or have you made up your mind. If you have made up your mind, what will you now next do? Good luck, and be happy! Do remember that sometimes people from different backgrounds and experiences can be good people and not understand each other very well, often spinning out of control until people get hurt. Naturally, i am being highly optimistic here, as I have seen the opposite too. Best to you and it was certainly a surprise to hear.

They speak in fractions (I can not recall the pinyon for it, but in chinese i can say it, it sounds like, for example sui fenzhe yi) would be 25% or 1 out of 4, or a quarter.

You make a fair point! The chinese were the first that were excluded legally (although slavery could be considered a form as well) and there were others too. It is sad... But you are also right. We can work for change, but we should always keep a smile and a positive attitude! Thank you very much.

I thought that you only needed enough co-sponsors to make it above the legal lower limit. And this is not something to be taken lightly. A co-sponsor can be held legally responsible to pay for her care if something is to happen. This is something that should be discussed carefully, and involve as few people as possible (IMHO). Good Luck!

I agree that you should follow with what she wants, and that as parents, you and your wife should help her to gain information. However, even adoption is not an easy answer and often times fails. I have two examples. A relative of mine (identity to not be released, for reasons that the person is still alive today and I do not want her to go to jail), almost 30 years before the Roe decision, was pregnant and decided that she would keep the baby, since it was illegal to have an abortion and since she was very young at the time. It turns out that after 4 months, she was too young and too scared and the pregnancy went astray. There are definite connections between stress and problem pregnancies today. We know this. Although it would have been easy to have a back street abortion quickly, at this stage, it was not for her. Not only would the procedure be tough, but the chances of doing it discreetely were very narrow. She, in the end, went to Canada (only time she left the us) to have it done, and it saved her life. The second case was a school-mate and good friend of mine. At 19, he and his girlfriend were going to have a kid. They already fought with each other verbally, and he sought help. All 4 guardians encouraged them to have the kid, 2 to keep and 2 to adopt. I strongly recommended to him to consider the abortion. His gf was open to that too, but in the end they decided to keep and adopt. Well, it turns out that, like many couples, when they actually have the kid, they no longer want to adopt, at least the girl did not anyway. And legally, if one parent does not want to adopt, it makes it nearly impossible to adopt the kid. Well, now today they are still together, and fighting, and who is suffering the most -- The poor kid. I do not want to say that these situations, both of which are for people I personally know, are typical, but they certainly are possible and have happened to millions of people, in addition to all of the wonderful stories that we hear too. So, I want to wish you the best with your difficult situation. I hope in the end, whatever is decided allows everyone to learn and to grow and to feel comfortable with themself, in as informed a manner as possible. All the Best!

In China, they have a similar system (1, 2, 5 fen), (1, 5 jiao), 1 yuan. What I have done is found coins from each category in the US that are her birthday and given them to her. This way, she has something from her birth year and the coins to become familiar with.

I am sorry about your situation. And no, it is *not* fair. On the GZ website, it clearly says that the process will take 3-5 months for an IV from when the first get the documents. This means from the time that DHL places them there. If people from the consulate are not going over to physically pick them up (as compared to the Chinese gov't holding them, and we all know that they will not pick them up too frequently as they already have enough to deal with), then that is already ticking off of the 3-5 months time. And given the fact that the world-wide average based on State Department statistics is a mere 2-4 months, from the time the NOA-1 is issued, this is intolerable. It has caused me great frustration, on and off depression, and a feeling of wanting to learn what happened to the US that I was taught about in High School, as it seems that the US from those days does not exist anymore in my mind in ways. I am grateful that there is a process and that I will hopefully, sometime soon, be able to have a chance to be reunited, forever, with my darling precious! But, I was told a story by a guy from Holland who is engaged to a lady from China, and he said that after 3 weeks of waiting, and filing a few documents, that a 180 day visa was issued for her to come and visit him. Then they spent the time together, got married, and it took only about 1 month for her to have some type of pass issued which seems to be similar to a US green card, but for the EU nations. Why is it that Europe (or at least Holland in this case) can seem to do this with so much more efficiency? But, at least there is hope that we can all, someday, be together, and that we are so lucky to have met such perfect and amazing people for us to live with and share our lives with. Mari, good luck! Everyone, good luck! LeLe

I would think they spend more than 15 minutes on each interview. They probably review the file, before the actual interview. And then there are coffee and toilet breaks, and whatever breaks. jimb Yep! I gather that. This is why I only have them working on interviews for 4 hours each day. My assumption is that the rest of their time is spent reviewing case files, having some fun (which is not supposed to count towards their 37.5 hours a week), having lunch (which they are permitted to have for at least 30 minutes a day, paid, so long as they work at *least* 37.5 hours a week, and hence how they get a 40 hour work week!), etc. I did not factor in sick days, and this usually runs to be about 8-10% in the US. Since the pollution in GZ is much worse, it could run as high as 15% even, but that is not too significant in terms of narrowing the gap by the amount it would need to be lowered by.

Your math is a little flawed. Don't forget about the re-interviews from blue and yellow slips. Notice, I said they were working for 4 hours a day! But, as government employees, they are supposed to work 37.5 hours a week, which comes out to roughly 7.5 hours a day. I am assuming that the other 3.5 hours a day is sufficient for them to do this. But, as has been pointed out, due to inefficiency, lack of caring, logistics, or other issues at hand (or just a lack of effort or energy) that they may not be performing up to my idealized assumptions! I just wanted to get an *order of magnitude* estimate. Even if the estimate is off by 30%, it still shows that there seems to be a serious shortfall out there.

So that's the state of our nation. That's sad A few years back, I saw a survey that when given a globe of the world (without any words or political boarders drawn on it), only 70% could find the USA and less than 10% could find their home state. I know that it was a few year old, but it makes me so sad to have read that article.

Wow! Tough situation. I am sure that it will work out well. I will *not* offer my own opinions, as they likely will conflict with what your daughter has already decided (I would personally have an abortion in this case, and surround myself with family and friends and work to chart out a plan of action of how I can move to a state in my life where I will feel more secure and stable --- but I have seen far too many couples be torn apart by staying together in this case, usually to the detriment of the kid). What I can tell you however is that in the north of China at least that termination is very common in a situation like this (based on stories of what my darling's friends have gone through, she seems to be the only one who has never been pregnant and all of the others have terminated or used some type of long-term birth control to prevent this from happening). However, in one case where the person had the baby, there was a problem. The man was not *legally* old enough to marry the woman (I think that in her province you need to be at least 25 as a man to marry). She also tells me that when married, the woman must join the *baby's father's* family, not the mother's. Sorry, it is only a set of opinions and observations based on limited data. It also seems that the culture found in urban cities in the north may not be applicable as well to the case of the culture that your daughter was raised in. But the best of luck to you and I hope that it all goes well.

Currently in Boston there is already oversaturation in this market for the average person wanting to learn. When I was on the T yesterday (the "T" is the subway in boston), the subway car I was in had advertisements for no fewer than 4 language schools, all displaying Chinese near the top of their language choices. However, if you were thinking of a *full time* chinese instruction school, that would be a different idea, and could work. Or if you were thinking a program which would work with university aged people or business professionals, that market is also under-utilized at the time too, however, by the time you come, it may not any longer be that way. My advice would be to persue this, but start making contacts now! Good Luck!

This is good advice- my wallet has been stolen 3 times in China and my cell phone was almost stolen- the guy had it in his hand then xiao ming saw him and he gave it back to us. Be especially careful on the busses. Be really *careful* on the sleeper trains. I always sleep with any valuables I have either in my pocket or under my pillow. One time, there was a person snooping around, but he never would have dared to do anything other than rummage through bags on the floor... However, the trains are good in that if it is stolen, but you can notice before the train stops, and you ask the police nicely, they can hunt through the train to help you track the thief down...but luckily I never needed to use this option!

Every year the us gives away 50,000 Green Cards, free. The only restrictions on applying (they are given away by lottery) are that you come from a country, or that one of your parents comes from a country, that has an immigration number which is below a certain level. For many years now, China, India, Canada, and the UK have always exceeded that level, and hence people from China are *not eligible*, unless one of their parents has a passport, which is current, and is not a Chinese passport. Since only very few people do have them, and since very few people in Mongolia apply every year, I do not see why this is even something for them to consider as taking up their time at the consulate. Unless I am missing something here?

Thanks for the info!!! There are *very* few people from China who can even apply to the DV lottery! You can not apply if you are chinese, unless at least one of your parents is not chinese. And if you are Hong Kong or Omen, you need to apply via Hong Kong, so I am not too sure about that argument. Ok, so if there are 9 VO's and they do 15 minute interviews for 4 hours a day, that is 144 a day, and at 20 days a month, it is 2880 a month. Do they *really* have a backlog of 14,000, and hence require many months to clear it out???

I never use g-mail anymore, because it requires cookies to be turned on. I was always getting too much spyware being added to my computer when I used it. I am not sure if hotmail does that these days too or not (I have not used it in over 8 years). Is it possible that cookies are blocked from your computer?

What about Raise the Red Lantern (is that the correct title) also by the same director?

Well Put!!! Hey, although I am a male and will never know what it feels like, I do know that if I were in pain, I would want to be cared for, so it only seems natural to care back.

2. Right now, if you stay married and in china for not much longer, so long as she remains a citizen, you can apply for a Chinese green card, which will entitle you to all of the rights of a citizen there and also, it is *hard* to get an employment visa as a FORMER Chinese citizen to work back in China again, unless you have some type of advanced degree (PhD/Law Degree) or are investing *large* sums of money. However, if she obtains a green card, she does not need to give up her Chinese passport, and it will not prevent you from obtaining an easier status. Since it seems you want to live in China, I would strongly recommend if anything your moving closer to being able to stay in China, rather than her giving up your link to China! Just my own 2cents however.