Interviewer Instinct

[PJ]

It's okay to fret and worry about the details (I sure did more than my share of it), but I would be careful not to let your fiancee know you are worrying and fretting and stressing.

 

I think a lot of the blue slips and unreasonable demands are caused by a VO sensing (whether right or wrong) that something is "out of place". These feelings can be triggered by simple nervousness. If they think everything's a-ok, I'm sure you can take a 2 year old bank letter. If they think something's amiss (again I'm not saying they're correct in thinking something is amiss, I'm just saying that's their thought) that's when they want videotape, all your bank statements for past year, etc. etc. etc.

 

About the "gut instinct" ... I have only been stopped and searched thoroughly going through customs once coming back from China. It was because I got in line and some a--hole had the nerve to tell me "I was here first, get to the back buddy". I told him "hey I was here first" and was irked by the time I got to the front of the line. I think the customs agents sensed something was "out of place" because that time my bags were thoroughly searched, all the clothes even dug through and every single zipper opened.

 

The rest of the times, they just asked me a simple question like "are you bringing in food?" and wouldn't even check the bags.

 

When you see so many people, genuine, and people pulling scams, you just sort of develop an ability to "read" and "go with your gut". I don't blame the VOs for this, I have no doubt I would do the same in their situation and I am certain that most people on Candle would as well.

 

The day before my fiancee's interview, we went shopping on Beijing Road in Guangzhou (you know all the stores and bright lights and stuff). We talked about purses, and what we would have for lunch the next day and the day after that. I don't think "interview" or "consulate" was mentioned more than once, just talk about purses and lunch.

 

P.J.

[mtbdude]

thanks for that, pj. beijing road sounds like a good diversion. yan zi is very confident, though. i think i am the one who is starting to feel the butterflies. i guess because it seems to be something that is out of our control, and maybe i have a little bit of control-freak in my makeup. but we have lots of points for us. i've been there 5 times and will be there for this, reams of emails, multiple phone calls per day, chats, photos of me with her family, a nice diamond on her finger, supporting her for 4 months now, lots of emails to gz and phone calls to dos, atty prep'd docs, and i work for another federal agency. i think our age difference is the only thing that could raise a question. i'm 51 and she's 28. just thinking out loud. less than 4 weeks!!! should be happy about this, but i'm getting worried. i'll re-read your post.

[PJ]

Beijing road my friend. Give her a couple hundred RMB tell her she can buy whatever she wants, it's her money, and all worries about pending interview will be forgotten. Not sure if it is setting a good precident for later on though.

[Guest blsqueaky]

PJ, very good post. I know that before Ling went for her interview, she was always telliing me that she was worried, and I had to keep telling her not to worry, because I was not worried, not in the least(yes, you belive this).

 

Ohhhh Beijiing Road, been there, done that, she loves it.

 

I think that if are SO's think that we might be worried, then they will worry. Still till this day, Ling always worry about me when on the road.