sylinchinastill Posted May 4, 2004 Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 I am an American girl marrying a Chinese man and we have out interview on the 19th. I feel very optomistic about getting the visa- I have lived in China for three years now and we have been together for two and a half and my fiance did his MBA in the US so- I'm still nervous but planning the wedding and etc. anyway. We have a small business and are preparing to ship things from our business and our personal furniture to the US by ship. I have been reading this site lately although I never post and I was looking back at some old posts and noticed that someone said they were picking up their wife's things in the US- (which were shipped from China by boat). We have looked into shipping from here but some of the estimates have been ridiculously high. Like $4,000 high- If anyone whose wife has done this knows about how much it was for them to ship- it will be a whole container- I will really appreciate it. Also- one more thing. I have a friend who came to China with me my first year and she did this process last year. At the interview her boyfriend was told to come back and pick up his visa but he wasn't able to get it for 6 months. The interview was in August of 2002 and they received the visa in March of 2003. Has anyone heard of this happening? Thanks! Link to comment
kimnjake Posted May 4, 2004 Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 hey syl!Don is right, it is Mari and I who are nearly the only two girls on here, although i have seen another kim lately??? anyway, i just married my chinese fiance in april. he got here in march. i too lived in china for a while and that is how we met. anyway, the part of your question about waiting 6 months for your visa, well that was back in the "black hole days" and there were a LOT of problems at that time. there are many people on this site that went through that as well, but as of late, this doesn't happen anymore. may God bless y'all on your interview date that will be here soon. just be very prepared and everything should go well! ask any questions you may have or express any fears, we would love to help y'all out in any way we can!!please ask! God bless you!kim du Link to comment
sylinchinastill Posted May 4, 2004 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 Kim- Congrats on getting the visa and your wedding. You guys sound so much like us. I have read a lot about your story and noticed that your honeymoon was in the area of the states I am from- I am from Knoxville, TN. I was thinking of doing the same type of thing on our honeymoon. We will be living in Memphis next year- that is where I went for undergrad and now I am going to law school there- actually I came to China the first time with a program from The University of Memphis. I'm glad the 6 month thing hasn't happened for a while- it better not actually because my wedding is on July 10th! (I had to go ahead and get a place before everything booked up.) I'm interested in how you and your husband met and I read some about his adjustment to the US- Hengli (my fiance) went to Vanderbilt for grad school and so I know he will at least know what he is getting into and he is almost as tired of China as I am- but still I am very worried that he will have a hard time. Good luck to you! Link to comment
robandbolor Posted May 4, 2004 Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 did someone say USC - as in University of Southern California ? I am an alum! go Trojans! Link to comment
mari Posted May 4, 2004 Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 Hi Syl, I'm the other gal around here, met my fiance more than two years ago, and now waiting for our NOA2. This is the second marriage for both of us, but we intend to make it last until the end of our days (well, that's the way it's supposed to be). You're very lucky that you have your interview coming up so soon, as any new thing that comes up should not affect you. I wish you the best of lucks and please let us know how it went. Link to comment
kimnjake Posted May 4, 2004 Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 USC, as in United States Citizen hehe Link to comment
kimnjake Posted May 4, 2004 Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 hey!wow, we were not too far from Knoxville. I have been near there before, my good friend from high school went to school in Cookeville, and her sister lives in Knoxville! I really like TN!! I love going there!! Our honeymoon was great. It was an adjustment for Jacob, he is a city boy, but our one day in Atlanta was enough for him to last the remaining few days of the Mountains of Blue Ridge!! Law School!?! Wow what a challenge!! I had to do the exact same thing. The wedding was all planned, invitations ordered and EVERYTHING just about done before Jacob even had his interview, it was a step of faith, but in the end God was faithful. I don't know if you read the reports on Jacob's interview, but anyway, it was terrible, but once again God showed us His faithfulness. July 10th will be here before you know it! Those last few months come so quickly- in regard to the wedding, but NOT in regard to getting the visa. The days pass like years when you look at the time you have to wait to be together, but when you look at the plans that have to be made, there just isn't enough time!! You shouldn't have to worry about the six month thing, i haven't heard of it happening for quite a while now. the only delay is if they asked for more evidence, etc, but that should be able to be taken of quickly!!!! So where are you now? Still in China or back in the states? That is a huge blessing that your fiance has been to the US before. It has be quite difficult for Jacob to adjust. No really due to adjusting to America but due to fact that i have to tell my husband that at this time he cannot work, cannot drive, and cannot really do anything. He just sits at our apartment most of the time, tries to find something to do, sometimes comes to work with me, and sometimes goes and plays golf with a friend (he really enjoys that). but more than just occupying his time though, he hates the feeling he gets from not contributing to our fianancial situation and feels like he cannot contribute to our "family" situation. jacob loves it here, and doesn't miss china one bit, but i think he will be a lot happier when he can feel more like a "man". jacob and i met the first time in 2000. i went to china on a mission trip with my church. he was a friend of some of the friends we went to see in china. they introduced us, but nothing came of it anytime soon after that. i went back to china a year later, summer 2001, and lived there for 2 months. i taught english and worked as a missionary there sharing with college students. that summer jacob and i became very good friends, but nothing more than that. we saw each other often, i helped him with his english (which is excellent) and we studied the Bible together. after i left that August to come home to finish college, we kept in touch over email. a few months later, he told me he loved me. i too had fallen for him but kept it all in because i was afraid his feelings wouldn't be the same. but anyway, we kept in touch over email from August until i moved back to china the next january (2002). i lived there that time for six months and this is when we first started really dating. it was a wonderful six months of teaching english, sharing Jesus, and getting toknow my future husband. i moved back to america that july and about 4 months later we decided we wanted to marry each other, and we began the preliminary parts of the visa process. i went back to china in jan. 2003 and he signed the papers and all that fun stuff, and we submitted the visa paperwork that february. we actually used an immigration lawyer (wasn't needed- waste of money!) and we got our first NOA in april of that year. we waited it out until i was able to go back to see him again in july/august 2003. while i was there my sister called and said we got NOA 2 and we were so excited. we though the process would end soon after that, but we were wrong. the months from september until he got here in march of this year were soooo sooo hard. but we made it, God is faithful. Jacob passed his interview on Feb. 26, got his visa on the 27th, and flew here on March 3. we have been together ever since, and we are so blessed. it is very difficult some days. we realize now just how different we are, and some days are harder than others. all the while, we know we love each other, God put us together, and we will always work it out!! i hope i haven't given you toooo much information! (probably more than you asked for!! hehe) but again, please let us know if there is anything we can help you with!! write again soon!kim du Link to comment
oregonknl Posted May 4, 2004 Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 Hi Kim, Allow me to introduce myself! I am the other Kim you refered too... I'm in Portland, OR --like more than a few---- Love of my life is my Fei, in GZ --- our application is in the Chinese customs black hole right now, since first week of April --- at least we hope it is -- GZ Consulate has no record of our GZ #....... (I'm a male OF COURSE!!, since Kim is (was) a perfectly respectable boy/man's name --- at least in the US --- it usually was given to boys in the 30's - 60's as a reference to "Kim" the main character (little boy in India) in the novel by the same name by Rudyard Kipling, first published in 1901. In the early 1960's Kim Novac hit the silver screen, basically ruining the name for American boys ---and starting a long run of girl-kims . And Kim, Jake -- my congrads too for "threading the needle" through this process! --Kim Link to comment
mari Posted May 4, 2004 Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 A boy!!! What a surprise... he, he Link to comment
kimnjake Posted May 4, 2004 Report Share Posted May 4, 2004 Hey Kim! Sorry, didn't know you were a boy, hope i didn't offend you. I have met one other male Kim in my life. So, I had heard of that name for a male before, but it has been a while! How neat! I have actually had several people ask me if knew that Kim was a boy's name!?! It is also a Korean last name!! too funny! anyway, welcome to Candle, Kim, it is good to meet yoU!! Link to comment
Robert S. Posted May 5, 2004 Report Share Posted May 5, 2004 Kim really is supposed to be a boy's name like the Kipling character who finds a life in "the Great Game." Here in Alabama I have known several men who have girl's names including two named Lynn, one Opal, one Joyce, and other assorted weird things like that. Good luck to all of you. Link to comment
mari Posted May 5, 2004 Report Share Posted May 5, 2004 Kim seems ok for a guy, but I would hate to introduce my husband as "Joyce". Link to comment
sylinchinastill Posted May 5, 2004 Author Report Share Posted May 5, 2004 Thanks to everyone for welcoming me! I still can't find the shipping info so if anyone knows where it is and could post it here it would be very helpful. Hello to the girls- Kim and Mari- and the other Kim too (haha). Kim- I read the post about your interview- it sounds quite difficult. I know Hengli's English is fine so I'm not worried about that- I am worried about him losing his cool though- My mom is his sponsor even though Hengli actually has enough money on his own to sponsor himself unfortunately all the money from our business is in an account with his name on it and so it looks like I have barely any money. I just think that they will ask a lot about it in our case and I really hope he doesn't get frustrated when they ask him about it. How long until Jake is able to work? Do they have to issue a work permit for that? Did he do college in China or is he interested in going to school in the US or continuing education there? I'm glad Hengli's business will still be able to go on the way it is now. Even with a degree he had a hard time finding a job after he got his MBA (911 happened at the same time as well) and so he just started the business and came back to China to run it. My friend (the one with the 6 month delay problem) told me that they have had a long wait for the green card but that he does have his work permit now. I have heard that the wait for the green card can be up to 2 years- but I'll worry about that after the interview. Yes- I'm excited and ready for law school- that's why we HAVE to get it on the 19th and get back- I need some time with my family and to relax before I start what my mom refers to as the most difficult years of my life (she is an accountant in a law firm- so I guess she knows). Anyway- I'm rambling but it is great to meet everyone and if anyone has info on that shipping thing and could post it that would be great. Thanks! Link to comment
kimnjake Posted May 5, 2004 Report Share Posted May 5, 2004 So where are you now? Still in China or back in the states? well i guess if i read your name on here i could answer my own question!hehe we dont know how long the wait will be for jacob's work permit. we hope it wont be too long. but the estimation of the length of the wait depends on who you ask. there is a part of the website that says if he hasn't received it in 90 days then he can go to the office and get a temporary one. there is another part that says that he should get it in about 30 days. and then i have also heard it could be 3 to 6 months.....soooo who knows! i just pray it is soon! or at least we will hear something soon. this part of the wait is better in some ways because we are at least able to be together, but on the other hand, i feel it is putting a strain on our marriage in a way because he is so anxious to work to contribute as well as to have his needs and desires met during the day! being a man i know it makes it harder for him!!! (and maybe even being a chinese man makes it even a little harder as well!) but anyway, God will be faithful, we are sure of it! kim du Link to comment
sylinchinastill Posted May 5, 2004 Author Report Share Posted May 5, 2004 Thanks so much for the shipping info- that is definitely helpful! Kim- yes- I am still in China- I have been here for pretty much the whole time- only going home to visit. The wait for the work permit must be hard. I know here- even though we run our own business- if I'm not teaching or in school it is very hard for me to feel fulfilled. I think you guys are very lucky though because your faith is so strong and that is such an important thing to have and to share together. Hopefully something will work out soon with that. I will ask my friend how long her husband's took. I would think it is hard on both men and women to wait until they can work but definitely more so on men. And you're right about the Chinese man- Hengli is very focused on making money and I never think about it at all. He's been there about two months already right? So it should be about time on that. Maybe soon Link to comment
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