Preston

As I am reading this it sends chills down my spine . Yan has a son who will come here to my home from china. He is 15 now. His father has had custody papers noterized and will be sent to us soon so we can begin the process. He has transfered the custody to yan. I have thought this proof of a relationship between parents and a child was a bit cut and dried. I see that I am wrong. We have not started any paperwork yet so what "proof" will we need to show a continuing relationship. Yan has used a phone card and hardly any mail has been exchanged between them . We do have a fair amount of photos of the two of them together. When I was in China to see yan her son was not too keen on this idea so we have no photos of the three of us together. Perhaps an oversite on my part. Right at this point there are no e-mails,snail mail or phone bills that we can quickly lay our hands on. I really did not think this was necessary. Proof of a relationship with your mother. Who would have thought about this. I will sponser the child as my stepson. Yan was K-1 The best advice I would give to you now would be to be sure the son is well versed about you, carries the custody transfer papers with him, has documentation of his mom/your wife already in possession of her green card and living in the USA, and he demonstrate a desire to come here. If it is at all possible, your wife needs to go to Guangzhou with him and the son needs to be sure to let the VO know she is outside waiting for him. It would be best if she can attend the interview too, but I'm not sure she can get past the Chinese guard or if they VO will allow it, considering that the boy is 15 already. You would think that the consulate would still consider him a minor and would want the mother to be there too, but I can tell you from experience that they hire morons as VOs and they see nothing wrong with putting a child through an interrogation process similar to a criminal proceeding. My step-daughter is a very shy girl to begin with and the interview terrified her. Her mom described her like this: "Her leg was same like earthquake and her body too!" I am sure she gave the most minimal answers and couldn't think straight under the circumstances. You would think the VO would have enough sense to see the girl was scared to death and would show a little compassion. But he only asked her 2 or 3 three questions and dismissed her out of hand...I'm thinking it was a foregone conclusion before she ever entered the room and they had no intention of issuing her a visa from the get-go. From what my wife told me, "Many, many people there get white paper today!", unlike when she went to her own interview and the majority received their visas. My wife pointed out the fact that the date was September the 11th and she thought that maybe THAT had something to do with it and I told her I didn't think so. But in retrospect, and considering the fact that nothing else makes sense, maybe she was on to something there..... You can never be too careful these days what with all the 14 yr old Chinese girls committing terrorist acts and blowing up embassies all over the world!! hahaha If your son shows a little enthusiasm and can talk a little about you,, I don't think you'll need all the other things you mentioned above, such as the letters and pictures. If he only has one picture and he can show that his mom is already here and that he really wants to come to the US, I'm thinking he won't have any problems unless the consulate has already made up their minds as I'm starting to believe they did in our case. If that's true, however, then you could show all the evidence in the world and it wouldn't do you any good. Here's hoping you won't experience the same ordeal we're going through and that your son will be with you and his mom soon. Best of luck to you

Thanks for sharing that. I understand how the in-laws can continue to have a good relationship (my wife was widowed) and will also take good care of the child. My first thought when I read the original post was "that poor girl". I'm glad to know she is not in as bad a position as I imagined. Once again: Best wishes in all of this. Thank you. It appears we're gonna need all the "best wishes" you can spare. Our daughter's safe-keeping and physical well-being is not a concern for us at the moment. The fact that she is in a boarding school during the school year and the father had custody these past few years means that she only saw her mother sporadically. While they (the ex's) had an every-other-weekend arrangement of visitation, this wasn't adhered to religiously as often times, the daughter would want to spend time with her friends, father's parents, mother's parents, etc., and missed the mother's weekend entirely. No one had a problem with this arrangement and the mother was always available and nearby so everyone was relatively happy with the situation. While this may have been ok in the past, the girl is 14 yrs old now and a 14 yr old needs her mom more than ever at that age. I'm more worried about her mental and emotional well-being now and wish the ^%@%$@%^$ VO had taken that into account when he conducted the interview. I SWEAR I cannot understand the thought processes some people of authority have and I wish I could talk to this jerk just to see if I could actually SEE the cogs moving in his head! lol Thank you again and take care

Reckon why we didn't get a blue slip?

Some very good advise here..do not delay any more. Your daughter maybe in good hands in China, but she is still very young and feeling rejected. She has been rejected by her father, by the asshat of a VO and she will soon not have her Mother with her(another rejection). Change the ticket or eat the cost..it's never to late to stop your wife from coming back...She needs to be with her daughter during this time as well. Have your wife go to the consulate and raise hell over the interview and her being denied entry. Raising Hell at the consulate would only satisfy our need to vent; it will not change the outcome and could even have an adverse affect on any future negotiations or interviews. As much as I'd like to go there myself and demand to speak to this moron that conducted the interview, the result would only be a waste of time and resources, both of which are very limited to me. I don't make much money and have had to scrimp and sacrifice in order to come as far as we have now. Having to file 2 separate petitions, as opposed to the 1 if the ex-husband had initially agreed to the transfer of custody, the sky-rocketing of ticket prices due to the cost of jet fuel, the cut-back of my hours at work (60 to 70 hours/wk to being thankful if I get 55 hours. My job is a construction-related occupation and my boss is ANOTHER moron lol), the multiple unexpected home and auto repairs that have cropped up (my co-worker swears I must have gremlins ), not to mention the rise of inflation that we're all experiencing now, has me walking the tightrope with my expenditures and I need to be careful so that I will be able to cover the cost of the appeal and travel expenses I know are forthcoming once we have resolution of this matter. "Eating" the cost of the ticket is not an option and with the uncertainty of how this will evolve and from what I've been told about the length of time that an appeal can take, I have no idea of the date to re-schedule the ticket. It's a very troubling and uncertain time for us right now and with the denial catching us totally off-guard as it did, we feel as if we're lost at sea and not sure if there's a lifeboat on the way or not. Ying wants to come home now and I need her here too. We'll just have to re-group and get ready for the next battle. I've contacted my Senator and his office immediately opened a file on this and has already contacted the DOS for us for more information. As of yesterday, DOS has not replied to them so I'm not sure of our options yet and hopefully will hear something next week when everyone goes back to work. Knowing how our government works however, I'm thinking we're in this for the long haul. Thank you all for your input and encouragement and if any of you are planning a trip to Chongqing, China and feel like you can fit a 14 yr. old girl in your suitcase on the return trip home, I won't be able to pay you very well but I'll paint your house, wash your car, do your laundry, rake your yard, etc.,etc, etc.

The father in China has custody and decided to allow the child to immigrate when he remarried. Well actually, he has been remarried for quite some time now and only changed his mind after the new wife wanted a baby. (remember the 1 child policy there?)

Our daughter is in very good hands there in China. My wife tells me her ex mother-in-law still loves her ("her" meaning my wife) and takes care of our daughter most of the time. Other times she stays at my mother-in-law's and she really doesn't see her dad very often anyway. During the school year, she goes to school on Monday and stays there until Friday so maybe she sees her dad one weekend a month. As for the reasoning behind him changing his mind, WHO CARES!!!! hahahahaha That's what I was wanting from the very beginning and you would not believe how happy I was when I got the news. Can you imagine how guilty I was feeling about taking her mom 10,000 miles to the other side of the world? 2 days before our wedding I pulled my wife aside and told her maybe we shouldn't get married; maybe it was a bad idea and maybe we should wait until she was older or I could move to China. Family is very very important to me and I lost my own mom when I was the same age as our daughter. The thought of taking her mom away from her tore me apart and almost put a stop to the whole thing. Ying and I sat up all night discussing this and only the fact that the ex had custody and there was nothing we could do about it and we could come back once or twice a year to see her until she was old enough to make her own decisions helped us to decide we had to consider our own happiness too, and go on with the wedding. And although I am a little discouraged tonight and some of the air has been let out of my balloon, so to speak, all is not lost and I don't give up a fight until I CAN'T get up. Take care and thank you for your thoughts

It's too late to keep the wife (Ying) in China as I've already purchased her ticket for her to return home on the 11th. She's been there since the end of July because her mom got sick and I told her to stay until the interview. (we hadn't been notified of the interview at the time but I thought it wouldn't be long and her mom was in pretty bad shape) I e-mailed Senator Jeff Sessions (R. Alabama) Sunday night and had a message on my phone from his office Monday evening when I got home from work. Not only was I surprised at the promptness of their reply, but the young lady I spoke to was very courteous and eager to be of help. She told me to obtain a Privacy Release form from their web site, sign it, fax it to them tomorrow so that they would have authority to examine my petition, and she would see if there was anything they could do to help us. I can only hope for the best. While I was looking at their web site, I followed a link concerning Visa denial and was informed there that I would get a letter from immigration explaining the reason for the denial and whether or not an appeal was possible and what I would have to do to begin it. It mentioned an appeal fee would have to be paid but it didn't say how much the fee would be so I'm in the dark about that, but the most disturbing thing I read there said that the appeal process had to be started within 30 days of the denial. The "denial" now,,,,not the receipt of the letter immigration's supposed to send me. It's already been 2 weeks since the interview and I haven't received the letter yet. Had I not written to Senator Sessions, I wouldn't know this and I would still be waiting on the letter. Considering the slowness of every other step in the petition process, I think a successful appeal would be nearly impossible in the time frame allotted to me even if I got the letter tomorrow. Oh well,,,,,wish us luck. Thanks for all the input here from everyone and I hope I can come back here soon and tell ya'll everything's ok. Take care

We have the notarized documents from the father relinquishing custody to her mother and nothing is being said about us needing to provide additional information or that the petition is incomplete in any way. According to what my wife told me, the only explanation given was their belief that she (the daughter) and I don't have a "bona fide" relationship. That's all I know at the present

My wife is due back on the 11th and I can read the "white paper" myself then but I am sure it doesn't say anything about needing additional information. It is my understanding that if that was the problem, she would have received a different color paper. I called immigration and while they didn't have the reason for the denial, they are the ones that told me I can appeal it. They told me I would receive a letter explaining the denial but I haven't gotten it yet and I have no idea how the appeal process works... I was hoping someone here had already experienced something similar and can give me more insight. Thanks for replying so quickly and if you hear anything that might will help,,,I would appreciate it. A denial is final. They will return the file to the US with a recommendation to revoke the original I-130 petition. You MAY get a chance to appear at a hearing and present your case as to why it shouldn't be revoked (in one case this was even done by mail), and should be re-affirmed and returned to GUZ. But approval or denial is in the hands of the folks at GUZ. If it truly was denied with intent to deny, this is easily the most vicious thing I've ever heard of them doing. Picking on a 14 year-old child? What is the issue here? I wish I knew...it doesn't make sense to me and to be quite honest, I never worried about whether or not she would get the visa...I was more concerned about getting her in school and the problems I was looking at because of her poor English skills. It never occurred to me that she would be denied and I've racked my brain trying to figure out their reasoning behind this decision. How can anyone justify leaving a 14 year old girl 10,000 miles from her mother? What does my relationship with her or the lack thereof have to do with her relationship with her own mother? This just doesn't make sense to me at all.

My wife is due back on the 11th and I can read the "white paper" myself then but I am sure it doesn't say anything about needing additional information. It is my understanding that if that was the problem, she would have received a different color paper. I called immigration and while they didn't have the reason for the denial, they are the ones that told me I can appeal it. They told me I would receive a letter explaining the denial but I haven't gotten it yet and I have no idea how the appeal process works... I was hoping someone here had already experienced something similar and can give me more insight. Thanks for replying so quickly and if you hear anything that might will help,,,I would appreciate it.

My step-daughter was denied her visa and received a white slip. My wife's ex-husband had custody of their child when we filed for my wife's CR-1 and wouldn't let the daughter come here too, but then changed his mind half way through the process. (He is married again and the new wife wants to have a child now so he relinquished custody) All the forms were in order and all the fees paid but she was denied the visa because, according to the white slip, she and I didn't have a "bona fide" relationship. This sounds like total BS to me and my relationship with her shouldn't be a major priority considering her mother is already here and the child is only 14 years old and needs to be with her mother. I sent my wife back to China to go with our daughter to the interview ( on September 11th) but she was not allowed to attend the interview and no one bothered to give her the reason behind the denial. (she sent me her version of what was written on the white slip and I have not received anything from immigration so I have to take her word for the explanation given there) My wife told me that "many many people get white slip" that day and I'm thinking maybe immigration had met it's quota for the period and the denial was based on that. Whatever their reasoning, what do we do now? I was told we can appeal but what am I looking at now? Do any of you know how long the appeal process takes or anything I can do to speed everything up? I will certainly appreciate any input or advice you might can share with me/us and if any of you have already experienced this and can tell me what to expect, maybe I can get started on the appeal process even before I get the letter from immigration. Thank you and I hope you have a good day. Preston

I posted this one time before but I don't see it anywhere and I haven't gotten a response.... Maybe I did something wrong ( I'm quite the computer illiterate, you know. lol) so I'll try again. My wife's interview is scheduled for the 25th of February and as much as I'd like to be there to help her with her belongings and to ensure she doesn't have any problems making flight connections on her trip here, my finances are a little strained at this time and I'm very limited on the amount of time I can be away from work. While I have plenty of time for the trip to and from the interview, I'll have to go immediately back to work when we get back and I feel it's important to spend the first few days here at home with her until she gets accustomed to her new surroundings. I know the decision is ultimately mine to make but maybe it would be easier to decide if someone here can clarify something for me. I have been told that it's best if the spouse (me ) is present during the interview process (even though the spouse is not allowed in the interview itself) because it adds legitimacy to the marriage thus increasing the likelihood of her visa approval. Have any of you "spouses" foregone the interview process and if so, did it cause any difficulties for you? I would appreciate any input here and welcome all opinions. Thank you, Preston

My wife's interview is February 25 and while I know I can't attend the interview itself, I've been told that my presence in Guangzhou is recommended so as to add legitimacy to the marriage and to improve our chances of obtaining a visa. Is this true? I want to go so that I can help her with her belongings and also to insure she has no problems at the various flight changes on her trip to the states, but there are certain circumstances that I don't want to get into at this moment that would make it better if I DON'T go.... What are your opinions? Should I make plans to be there or does my presence matter at all? I don't want to jeopardize anything at this point but it may be best for us for various reasons that I stay home and hope for the best. Any suggestions?

Thanks for the quick reply Jim. I was kind of expecting the outcome but you never know, do you? lol I would never have guessed I could claim the wife last year if someone hadn't suggested it to me and I didn't even think about her daughter until I started this years returns and thought it might be a good idea to look in to it. I appreciate your input Jim and I wish you all the best. Sincerely, Preston

I'm sorry,,,, I made a mistake about my initial petition date; I first filed for the CR-1 visa in January '07, not '06! lol