what's the difference?

[nygatl15]

I'm pleased that you've found your love and she is an American woman.

 

It is not easy to find the right woman anywhere in the world. I happen to

 

be attracted to Asian woman. My SO has lived in the US for several years

 

as a student. We get along very good. There are some cultural differences

 

but we don't really have any problems.

 

I was married to an american woman for 13 years, we just didn't work out.

 

I pray for you as I pray for myself and the other members here to have a

 

happy and healthy future in their futures. Good Luck

[itwontme]

maybe truth and trust sometimes..maybe one in the same..

don't see why so much complication between the two..not

now i don't anyway..maybe i'm wrong but most i've read about

that word culture for the most part was a mans doing..if ya realy

look the things that (truly) brings two people close..not much

difference at all i don't see..kinda like maybe all the rest is a set

of rules..i almost made worst mistake i could have ever made..

why...i almost let (truth) and a desire to know it stand alone..

almost seperated trust from truth...over some dumb little thing

i did not know all about at the time..i almost let the truth part

of trust over ride my mind...have a teacher though..a guide if you

will..she in very simple ways put them as one again..i didn't have

to get bent on finding the truth..asking..needing..to know..understand

all the why's..i set out on my own in this search..almost cost me the

one dream ever wanted..it was not culture difference had anything to

do with this...nothing to do with a set of some ones rules..it was truth

and trust put back in its proper place..without a burning need to know

truth..leaving half of that word out..trust..if you two truly have something

specail..if you realy have a bond...in many ways you will be shown all

just as a simple question in a careing..loveing way..don't listen to your

mind...don't think what you see sometimes with your eyes..say's it all..

just put truth..trust..love..respect..honesty..faithfullness..careing..to me

all these words are one..leave one of them out between you two...

it will tear you apart..don't fix in ur mind..something you think you say..read..or heard tell u all u need to know..and take off on your attack

for one word..sure somethings are plan to see..most is seen in real..everyday life...guess for most of us here a big part of our life before

we are one is spent on a web page..the web can help you find that one

person you want to spend your life with..and in a minute take it all away..

pls don't do what i almost did..don't read a email without really knowing

in your heart and mind all the reasons..right down to the date on it..don't

get bent sperating truth from trust..don't be a lawyer and put them on trial..i almost did that..i stopped to think about all we have together..all those words rolled into one..i let it go..only talked about our future as

a family..and my teacher placed it all before me..so it's not culture (a set of some ones rules) showed me the way..it was not taking trust away from truth that made us so much stronger..it was all those words put back where they should be..as one...take just one word away from your life with them...focus one that one word...it can rip u both apart...i almost made this mistake...almost lost her over truth alone..don't make my mistake..can cost you only life ever wanted..if thats truly what you seek......

Live long and prosper..(star trek)

[Dan R]

Joseph it is good to hear that you worked through things. I do think culture is more than rules. It is the way people in a place do things. It is how you learn to think of the world around you from thed time you are a baby. Because it is so ingrained you don't even think of it, it is very subtle. It is language and the way you think of things based on the imagery of the language.

 

Individuals can differ within a society. Different cultures will have different perameters within which one acts the norm. This is why it takes more trust in a cross cultural relation because you don't know what is the norm of the other culture. At the same time it is easier to abuse. We see both sides of this on CFL and 001.

 

In a nut shell, life aint easy.

 

Best Regards

[david_dawei]

nice post. Well thought out and a life example to boot ! This is one of those issues where I agree with two sides. I'm genetically allowed to, I'm a gemini !

 

We debate 'trust' and 'truth' on a philosophical level... passes the time as we wait for our SO !

 

I said earlier, Americans have a fetish with 'truth' and will go to any length to get to the 'bottom of it. That's a mentality I don't quite get and agree that this gets us into trouble more often than not... Anything that becomes my obsession (oops, does that include my SO?) , can ultimately bring me down.

 

Truth and trust can be seen as part of the same string (this is my 'string theory and only Paul will appreciate it) .. it doesn't matter if the string is used to tie something up or each end is connected to something else... they ultimately have a 'unified' part that makes them part of one and the same.

 

The arguments I like to make about trust is along the line you make: Don't make truth a desire to know stand alone. It then gets elevated to a level it is not intended to be...

 

What I prefer to do personally is to drop the whole 'truth' thing.. and focus on 'trust'. I can build trust with someone.. truth would naturally follow and I prefer for it to be less my focus.

 

 

The word 'truth' is interestingly told in the old ancedote: "The trouble is that we are told truth is at the bottom of a well; but each one looking therein sees only his own image."...

[itwontme]

Thanks Dan R.

And David.......

Just makes no sense why all this has to be so complex..

What do most people do? read a book or live a life?

Yes..some do say its your parents..things that happen

around you shapes your life..But for me it's something

i always had..for what ever reason..i had it in me.

And i see it in my (our) kids..Oh..culture thing..guess

who it was made them two really start to see who they

really are?? I've done my best but dads can only go so

far..sure be a friend also..but that has limits.............

Still have to be dad..One specail lady from a country

rich in (culture) made them two and a american man

see them..who they realy are..can be..................

Culture didn't do that did it?? ............................

It was one specail woman..with every word truly

holds meanings in your lfe..all in one package..

Yes..she's from China...What difference that realy

means..i do not know...I see none at all

[James]

Could you tell me in your opinion what's the difference between chinese girls and the US girls?

Gather 'round you beardless youth, and still your voices so that your ears may be filled with my words of wisdom:

 

There are only 2 key differences between the women in these two great nations:

 

1- The women in China speak English as a second language, while the women in the USA speak English as a first language.

 

2- In the USA you are far more likely to find that the carpet does not match the drapes.

In the USA they're also more likely to have no carpet.

[david_dawei]

Could you tell me in your opinion what's the difference between chinese girls and the US girls?

Gather 'round you beardless youth, and still your voices so that your ears may be filled with my words of wisdom:

 

There are only 2 key differences between the women in these two great nations:

 

1- The women in China speak English as a second language, while the women in the USA speak English as a first language.

 

2- In the USA you are far more likely to find that the carpet does not match the drapes.

In the USA they're also more likely to have no carpet.

Seriously? In the houses I was in, in China, I never saw a carpet... and I brushed it off as their pragmatism: Easier (and cheaper) to sweep than vacuum.

[James]

I feel fairly certain you saw carpet while in China ... what method was used to clean it, I have no idea ...

[david_dawei]

I feel fairly certain you saw carpet while in China ... what method was used to clean it, I have no idea ...

I was assuming in personal homes.. you also?

 

Carpet is like grass.. I never saw much point to it, and it's expensive and time consuming to keep up...

[James]

Personal homes are the most likely location, but other places are certainly possible.

[david_dawei]

Personal homes are the most likely location, but other places are certainly possible.

ok.. yes.. one small throw rug/carpet... cuz if I got on it, I was always told to take off my slippers!!

[Dan R]

I only saw rugs not carpet (wall to wall tacked down).

 

Those were hung and beaten or spot cleaned with a towel at businesses.

 

Most homes I was in were wood or linoleum or stone flooring. Slippers worn all the time.

[david_dawei]

I only saw rugs not carpet (wall to wall tacked down).

 

Those were hung and beaten or spot cleaned with a towel at businesses.

 

Most homes I was in were wood or linoleum or stone flooring. Slippers worn all the time.

except no slippers on the rug, right? I got jumped on! I learned very quickly from my SO..

[James]

I only saw rugs not carpet (wall to wall tacked down).

 

Those were hung and beaten or spot cleaned with a towel at businesses.

 

Most homes I was in were wood or linoleum or stone flooring. Slippers worn all the time.

except no slippers on the rug, right? I got jumped on! I learned very quickly from my SO..

Did these match the drapes? I am not sure about that hanging and beating stuff ... the spot cleaning might be best.

[david_dawei]

They did not match the drapes... but I think the point was , it really doesn't matter to them the way it does in the US...