Gift giving

[Guest Pommey]

Face

 

= the most thing to Chinese, and I s**t you not, its so imbedded in their phyce it guides them evey day in thought and action.

Can we define it, in your dreams can you accept it ? you have to, its not going to go away.

 

Face is one the biggest challenges in a chinese/ westen relationship , actions words and interaction both within the couple and with others is always perceived in face.

Now you may not see this as important, but you can bet your ass they do .

[weiaijiayou]

Face

 

= the most thing to Chinese, and I s**t you not, its so imbedded in their phyce it guides them evey day in thought and action.

Can we define it, in your dreams can you accept it ? you have to, its not going to go away.

 

Face is one the biggest challenges in a chinese/ westen relationship , actions words and interaction both within the couple and with others is always perceived in face.

Now you may not see this as important, but you can bet your ass they do .

From my understanding it's important -- it's a motivation just like the desire for security. I just don't see how it's central to what happened with timb. From what he and his wife said it seems like the other lady made his wife feel insecure. The woman seemed to timb's wife like a potential threat and home-wrecker. I just don't see what the face concept adds here -- and the cryptic way it's often talked about here makes me wonder if it's just being used as a way to say "oh, they're just different, they feel and do weird things, and we can't understand or explain it."

[timb]

Delusion no. I think this is more along the lines, is my gf put up with Lina, and remained friends with her up until her and I could communicate on a good level and I could understand her. She probably didn't respect Lina as a person, and felt Lina is not the sort of friend she liked.

 

There were things along the way that gave me the impression my gf didn't like Lina and didn't trust her. Lina asking for $100 to put her photos and information on a free website is one of them.

 

Perhaps it's things Lina confided in her that gave her the impression Lina was a capitalist and if the opportunity arose, she would, or could interfere with the relationship.

 

In any case, I'm taking my time to really understand this girl and not jumping in with two feet. I'm proceeding down the path to be with her, but I know anything can happen. So we will see.

 

 

 

Glad you got it resolved. It was starting to sound more and more like this kind of situation as your posts went along. Sometimes it's a man-woman thing and not a Chinese-Western one...

I guess it's only resolved if Lina is TRULY after Tim... and if she's not... then someones a bit delusion or jealous in a scary way.

[hannahsu]

none of those make any sense~~~~